“Mr. Links, I never…I didn’t intend...” Tasha blew out a deep breath, “I don’t want to make it seem like I’m not taking responsibility for my part in the affair with Tim. No one put a gun to my head to be with him. There are so many things I wish I could have done differently. I guess what I’m trying to say is…I thought he and I were friends. It grew into something more, I’m not even sure when.”
“Have you talked to him?”
“No. There’s no point.”
“Are you sure? I know you. You don’t love easily. So, I know you must have had some pretty strong feelings him. I hate what happened, and hoped Sabrina’s marriage would last but I know my daughter.”
“Mr. Links, I’ve had some time to think about how things went wrong between Sabrina and me. I think the root of it is she just wants your approval. For some crazy reason, she thinks you love me more. And, I know she’s mentioned to me on more than one occasion that she didn’t think you were proud of her.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“I know. But, it’s what she believes.”
“She really thinks that? Then, I’m going to have to set it right with her.”
“Yes.”
Mr. Links looked around the apartment. “I was never any good at goodbyes. They always make an old man like me get emotional.”
Tasha smiled, “Me too.”
“Don’t forget about me. And, call me when you get settled.”
“I can never forget about you. And, I’ll call as soon as I get to Dallas.” Tasha hugged the man who had loved her through it all since she was fourteen years old. “And, Mr. Links…thank you for everything and I love you too.”
Chapter 33
Sabrina spent almost three hours in her home fitness gym trying to work herself into exhaustion hoping it would help ease her mind. It hadn’t.
Work hadn’t even provided the typical reprieve either. As a matter of fact, she’d walked past her home office several times and not once did she have the desire to go inside.
In the past, working always gave her a sense of purpose and direction. She drew strength from it. However, since moving back into her condo, she’d been unable to find peace in anything.
She’d called her assistant earlier to tell her that not only was she not coming into the office but that she would be completely unavailable for the rest of the day. Her assistant was so shocked that she was tempted to make a home visit to ensure Sabrina wasn’t being held at gun-point.
What irked Sabrina the most was that Tim wasted no time filing for divorce. A couple of days after their fight, his lawyer contacted her lawyer wanting to settle it as quickly and quietly as possible. They were even willing to add a financial incentive outside of the prenup to do it.
It pissed Sabrina off because she knew that he was doing this to protect Tasha. He had enough dirt on her to leave her with nothing. Well, not exactly nothing. She would have been a fool to not have taken advantage of the opportunities that being married to him gave her. So, she may not be getting exactly what was spelled out in the agreement, but she wouldn’t be leaving the marriage empty handed either. Especially since Tim had been willing to exchange two million dollars for confidentiality and expediency. Her lawyer wanted five million.
Sabrina plopped down on her sofa and mumbled to herself, “No matter what everything seems to always revolve around Tasha.”
She was still reeling from her betrayal with Tim. Never in her wildest dreams would she have expected Tasha capable of that type of betrayal.
“I guess she had us all fooled. I wonder what daddy thinks about his little precious Tasha now?”
Everyone had flaws including Tasha. No longer could her father prop Tasha up as the model daughter anymore. And now Tasha can finally understand when two people fall in love how shit can happen.
Even though she never said it out loud, Sabrina always knew that Tasha thought she was weak and lacked discipline when it came to men.
“I didn’t lack discipline. I grew up and learned from my mistakes.” Never would she fall that deep in love again like she did in college. Sabrina still remembered falling in love in for the first time with Ryan. Ryan Witherby.
Sabrina had been having trouble with one of her math classes. Ryan had been a math tutor at the learning resource center. That’s how they’d met. She’d been immediately drawn to him which surprised her because she’d never been attracted to a white man before. Thinking back on it, it was his wicked smile and sparking gray eyes that first got her attention. But as he continued to tutor her, it was his intellect that really drew her to him. He was a pre-med student.
It wasn’t long before they started dating hot and heavy. Sabrina still held a dull ache in her chest thinking about him. He’d made promise after promise after promise to her. She believed every one of them. And, wouldn’t her father would be so proud that she’d met a wonderful man that was going to be a doctor!
Even though Ryan and Sabrina used condoms most of the time, there were a couple of occasions where things had moved way too fast and they hadn’t. She got pregnant.
The memory caused Sabrina to absently rub her stomach. And, her throat started to thicken.
Sabrina didn’t feel the least bit scared or nervous. In fact, she was ecstatic that they were going to have a child together.
Ryan held her in his arms as he explained his feelings to her, “Sabrina we’re not ready to be parents yet. You’re still trying to finish your degree and I’m still trying to get into med-school. The timing is just not good for either of us. I can’t believe I’m saying this to you because I love you so much, but we should terminate this pregnancy.”
“What? Ryan? Are you serious? This is our child. How can you even think that?”
“Do you think that it’s easy for me to want to do this? It’s not. But, I love you. What would your father think about you not finishing college and getting pregnant? I want to marry you but we still have so much school ahead of us. How would we even support a baby when we’re both still being supported by our parents? I can tell you now my parents would cut me off. That would end any chance I have of ever being able to finish school.”
“We could figure it out Ryan.”
“Sabrina be realistic. I promise you once we’re done with school, I’ll make you my wife and I’ll give you as many children as your heart desires.”
Sabrina aborted the baby. That was still the hardest decision she’d ever made. She’d gone on the pill immediately after that.
However, the second hardest decision she’d ever made was a year later, after getting sick and taking an anti-biotic, getting pregnant again. Sabrina saw this as the universe’s way of giving her back a child she’d lost. There was nothing Ryan could say this time that would make her give up this baby.
He started out with the same old tired excuses. They fell on deaf ears. However, one afternoon changed everything.
“Sabrina we’re not ready to be parents! I don’t want to have this child.”
“Well, ready or not, we’re going to have a baby.”
“And just how do you think we’re going to support him or her?”
“We’ll figure it out.”
Ryan was furious that she’d gotten pregnant again. He lashed out at her, “There is no way my parents would ever accept you or this baby. They’ll disown me first!”
Sabrina felt a chill throughout her whole body, “What are you talking about? They wouldn’t do that.”
“Yes. They would. They don’t believe in mixing the races Sabrina.”
“Then, it’ll just be me and you and our child.”
He wouldn’t look her in the eye, “I can never give up my family.”
Sabrina screamed at him, “but we’re your family too!”
“I love you but I won’t give up my life for you.”
Two days later Ryan moved out of his apartment and changed his phone number.
Sabrina didn’t know what to do. Ryan had literally walked…no ran out of he
r life and she didn’t really have any money to much of anything. There was no way she could tell her father. She felt hopeless and helpless. She’d have no other choice but to call Tasha.
Tasha spent over nine hours taking a train and two buses from school to be with Sabrina. She’d sat with her, prayed with her, and ultimately tried to talk her out of a decision she regretted for the rest of her life. When it was evident that Sabrina was determined to do anything to cut all ties with Ryan, Tasha had taken money that she’d been saving for a car to help her.
The day of the procedure, Sabrina lay in a bed in a cold clinic and made a promise to herself. She promised she would never feel hopeless or helpless again. But, more importantly, she promised she would never trust or love a man again the way she had with Ryan. Men couldn’t be trusted.
*****
Several hours later, her father attempted to ring her door bell just as she opened the door.
“Dad, what are you doing here?”
Smiling warmly he responded, “Oh…I was just doing some visiting today and thought I’d drop in to check up on you. Can I come in?”
Sabrina moved out of the way so that her dad could come inside.
“So, how are you holding up?”
Trying to sound tough as if she weren’t hurt and drained, Sabrina responded “I’m fine.”
Mr. Links didn’t believe her for a second. Sabrina always exhibited a tough exterior but he knew deep down inside she was hurting.
“Have you talked to Tim?”
“Only through our lawyers.”
“I see. How much longer do you think this process is going to take?”
“He could end it tomorrow if he would just agree to my terms.”
“What’s the hold up?”
“He wants to offer me two million in exchange for signing a confidentiality agreement. I want five.”
“Sabrina given all that’s happened don’t you think that’s excessive?”
Sabrina spat at him, “I knew you would take her side!”
Genuinely looking incredulous, “What are you talking about? Who’s side?”
“Hers. Tasha’s side. She cheats on me with my husband and you still take her side. And, Tim is worth BILLIONS, five million dollars is nothing to him! He’s only doing this to protect her. He doesn’t want me to tell the world that your little princess cheated with my husband.”
Mr. Links remembered what Tasha had told him just hours ago about how Sabrina really felt about their relationship. Maybe she was right.
“Sabrina, why would you think I would take Tasha’s side?”
Sabrina actually started to cry, “Because you always have! She was always the child who brought home the good grades. She was always the child who you praised and no matter what I did…I could never please you. I could never measure up to her.”
The last time Mr. Links had seen Sabrina cry she was twelve.
“Sabrina Links. I owe you an apology.”
Looking perplexed she angrily swiped away her tears.
“For what?”
“For making you feel like you were never enough. Sweetheart, I love you and you’ve always made me proud.”
She looked at him as if she didn’t believe what was coming out of his mouth.
He let out a deep breath, “Can we sit down?”
Sabrina led her father over to the sofa and they sat.
It took him a moment before he spoke again. “Sabrina, Tasha was always a shy little girl and when Mr. Stevens died, she had nobody. In trying to show her that she wasn’t alone, that she was loved, and instill in her the confidence that you already possessed maybe I didn’t realize how uneven I handed out the praise. That was my mistake. I never loved her more. I loved her equally. I still love her equally.”
Sabrina whispered, “Even after everything that she’s done to me you still love her?”
“Yes. I’m not always happy with the choices either of you make, but it’ll never stop me from loving her…or you. I’m hoping in time you’ll learn to forgive each other. No matter what we’re still family. A crazy family but family none the less.”
“I’ll never forgive her and more importantly she’ll never forgive me.”
“Never is a long time. The anger will fade in time and when it does, I hope you can find a way to rebuild your friendship…no your sisterhood.”
She couldn’t image it.
“Daddy what are you doing? I’m taking off my coat. I figured if you didn’t have anything else planned I would stay the afternoon and watch a little tv. Is that okay with you?”
Sabrina smiled for the first time in a long time. She gave him the remote and snuggled up into the crook of his arms just like she did when she was a little girl. They spent the rest of the day that way.”
Chapter 34
Tasha had been in Dallas for several months now. It was different from Chicago but it was definitely a fresh start.
Although, she was still finding her footing as the Director of Cultural Awareness with the AllenDyne Foundation, she loved it.
There was so much to do helping at risk youths, that she could literally work twenty four hours and still not get everything done. Being busy helped to ease some of the loneliness. She still hadn’t made many friends outside of her co-workers.
However, tonight, some of the ladies from the foundation were going out to celebrate a huge contribution from an anonymous benefactor. He or she would be revealed next month at a luncheon in their honor.
It was the end of the day when her co-workers, Lauren and Janice, popped into her office.
Janice sat on the edge of her desk, “Tasha you’ve got to come out with us tonight. You always say no. But, tonight we’re not taking no for an answer.”
Lauren sat in the chair opposite Tasha, “Yes and if you’re lucky, maybe I’ll hook you up with my husband’s brother, Jeremy. He’s a nice guy.”
Tasha propped her elbows up on her desk and placed her chin in her hands. “You guys, it’s been a long week and I’m exhausted. I’m just going to go home, have a glass of wine and relax. And, I’ve told you both a million times, I’m not interested in dating anyone right now.”
Lauren and Janice exchanged knowing looks. Then, Janice spoke, “Hmm…and just why is that? Is there a special guy?”
Tasha smiled, “No. There is no special guy. I just moved here. I’m still trying to find my way around the city.”
Janice stood up, “That’s interesting because there is this really gorgeous guy out front who says he’s a friend of yours from Chicago. If he’s only a friend then I’m going to flirt with him. Did I mention his taste in flowers is incredible?”
The smile that had been on her face completely disappeared. She tried to act nonchalant but wasn’t very convincing, “Did he give you his name?”
Janice and Lauren both said in unison, “Timothy Horne.”
Tasha swallowed hard. What was he doing here? He heart was going to beat out of her chest.
“She looks nervous to me. What do you think Lauren?”
“I think he was more than just a friend from Chicago and I can’t wait to get the story.”
Tasha laughed nervously, “You guys do realize I’m standing right here.”
Janice responded, “Are you going to stay in here talking to us or leave him standing out there?”
“Can you give me a minute and then send him in?”
Lauren smiled, “Yes. We’ll let him know. Since we’re the last ones in the office we were just going to take off after that if that’s okay? Or, should we stay until he leaves?”
“Oh no, your shifts are over so you can take off. I’ll be safe with Mr. Horne.” At least she hoped.
Janice followed Lauren out of her office.
Tasha hadn’t talked to Tim in almost six months. She needed a minute to get herself together before she came face to face with him. She stood up to smooth her skirt and dry her sweaty palms.
Why was she this nervous to see him? He’d hurt her.
She should hate him. Yet, he still starred in all of her dreams every night when she went to sleep. There was soft knock on her door. Janice brought Tim to her office.
“Ms. Stevens, Mr. Horne is here.” She stepped out of the way so that Tim could enter. “Lauren and I will be leaving unless you need anything else.”
“Thank you Janice, I’m fine. Have a great weekend.”
Breathing was next to impossible when Tim walked through the door. Janice closed the door when she left.
Tim stood there looking every bit as handsome as she’d ever seen him. He appeared to be just as nervous as she felt.
He couldn’t get enough of looking at her. It had been six long months. Tim had waited to try and see her because he needed to give her some time and some space.
“Hi…I um…brought you some flowers. I didn’t know what your favorite flowers were so I had them put one of every kind in the vase.”
Tasha walked around her desk, “They’re beautiful. Thank you.” She took them and turned her back to him as she sat them down on her desk. She needed just another minute to get her nerves under control so she took extra care in smelling and admiring the flowers.
“They’re not even close to how beautiful you are.”
Tasha closed her eyes. She spoke softly, “Tim…what are you doing here?”
Tim wiped his brow, “I was hoping maybe…you’d let me take you to dinner.”
She turned around, “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.”
“Tasha, I know that I messed things up pretty badly. But, I need you to know that I never intended for things to turn out the way they did. What I felt for you was real then…and it’s real now.”
“But you knew, Tim. You knew about Eric and Sabrina before we were together? How do I know that…you weren’t just trying to hurt her?”
Tim was dying to touch her. He saw the pain in her eyes and couldn’t believe he was the one who put it there.
The Stranger Next To Me Page 17
