“Comfortable?”
I settled my bag between my feet. “Yes.”
Nathaniel flicked the reins and the carriage moved smoothly away.
*
For the first hour of the drive, I divided my time between watching Nathaniel’s hands on the reins and trying to come up with something to say, but every subject seemed trite when I turned to look at him, and the lock of hair falling over his forehead and begging to be brushed back didn’t help my concentration. Nathaniel kept his eyes on the road as the horses flew along.
So I started watching the road myself. I recognized very little of what I saw until Nathaniel guided the horses with one hand and pointed to a small track through the woods. “That’s the path to the manor house.”
When I wasn’t looking at him, it was easier to talk, easier to remember him as the panther that had become my friend somewhere along the way. “Then this is the cursed forest?”
“The edge of it. It’s much warmer now that Crawa’s gone, isn’t it? The troll should be fine now. He’s much farther to the west now, nothing for us to worry about.” He turned to smile at me and scrambled the bit of sense I’d managed to pull together. To cover, I said the first thing that popped into my mind.
“How will we get through the maze?”
It must have sounded sensible, since Nathaniel answered. “I think we can go around. Without the spell, the forest is turning back to normal, to how I remember it anyway, I’m not sure it was ever truly normal, but we shouldn’t have any trouble.”
I’d used up all of my good conversation, such as it was, so we drove in silence for a few more miles before Nathaniel said, “I think Mrs. Boswell packed some cheese sandwiches in a basket in the back, if you’re hungry.”
I twisted around and found the sandwiches and a flask of tea just behind us. Nathaniel pulled the carriage over to the side of the road and we had a picnic lunch. Distracted by the food, I found it easier to talk, and we were soon chatting about the changes to the castle. Nathaniel told me about his plans for a larger library, and how surprised he was by the number of servants who had stayed even when they thought he was dead.
The rest of the journey passed in silence, but now it was comfortable. I watched the scenery fly by, trying to recognize what I was seeing from our journey, or watched Nathaniel guiding the carriage around the twists of the road.
The sun was still high above the horizon when I saw the small stone building in the distance. Now it was sitting in the middle of a perfectly normal field, and I could see it clearly. It was not unlike the shed where Nathaniel had been imprisoned at the manor house, small and squat with white stucco walls and a tile roof. I could see the small windows that had allowed Nathaniel to see the castle. There was a door now, plain and heavy with large hinges that could be seen even from the carriage.
I could see the maze, too, just a line of green on the horizon. Nathaniel followed my gaze. “We walked a distance, didn’t we?”
I smiled, but didn’t have to respond since Nathaniel’s full attention was on the horses again, guiding them down a path that had not been there before. Nathaniel drove the carriage right up to the door and leapt out, rushing around to help me down, but letting me go too quickly for me to enjoy his touch before he went to see to the horses. As I walked past the back of the carriage, I noticed several other bundles. Nathaniel noticed me looking.
“Those are mine. I’m going to camp out here tonight and drive back in the morning. I don’t fancy finding my way at night, with human eyes and shifting magics.”
“Thank you for going to the trouble.”
Nathaniel shrugged and opened the door to the shed for me, holding my hand and guiding me over the threshold. This time I had time to enjoy the light touch of his fingers wrapped around my hand. He did not seem to be in a hurry to let go, either.
*
The mirror was still there, against the wall, glowing faintly. I took that as a good sign, a sign the mirror still held power. The door to the stone room was still open. I could see that everything was as we had left it. Even the bolt cutters were still leaning against the wall near the cell. Nathaniel grabbed the edge of the mirror with his free hand. “I probably still need to manipulate the magic. I don’t think you’re considered part of it. I think I still can.”
I nodded. I wasn’t sure I trusted myself to talk just then.
Nathaniel couldn’t seem to stop talking. “Thank you for everything. And I’m sorry if I was … too caught up in my search for what I thought I needed to appreciate … “
I would have been uncomfortable with that gratitude no matter who it had come from, but from my handsome friend Nathaniel it was doubly embarrassing. I managed to mumble, “I’m glad I could help.” I tried to curtsy, but I wasn’t sure that he could tell that’s what I was doing.
Nathaniel nodded and turned his attention to the mirror. He held the side of it and concentrated. The glass turned milky; then it cleared and I could see the reading corner of the library, almost exactly as it had been. It looked like they’d gotten a new pillow. Nathaniel turned back to me. He looked like he was going to say something else, but didn’t know what. His hand tightened around mine, then he brought my hand to his lips and kissed it, his eyes never leaving mine. Before I could recover, he had guided me over the edge of the frame. I had enough wits about me to squeeze his hand and say, “Goodbye.”
When I was completely through the mirror, Nathaniel let go of my hand, the soft suede of his gloves slipping back through the mirror. His fingers stayed in the room for a moment, then he pulled back and the mirror became milky, then solid, showing nothing but the shabby chair and torch lamp of the reading corner. I was back.
Chapter 32
The library was the same as ever, the fluorescent lights making it impossible to tell the time of day, the lack of students telling me it was either early or late. I did not want to stay near the mirror, looking for signs of the other side. I went out to the parking lot.
Outside, it was mid-afternoon. Students were just getting ready to leave school, so I didn’t want to stick around. I didn’t think I was capable of casual conversation and I didn’t want to see anyone. My car was right where I’d left it, and my keys were still in the bottom of my knitting bag. They seemed so small compared to the keys in Nathaniel’s homes. But the car started and there were no tickets, so I pulled out of the lot and drove home.
*
Home was the same too, a bit dusty and in need of vacuuming, but essentially the same as it had been when I left. As I came through the door, I tripped over a pile of unopened mail waiting for me on the hall carpet. The answering machine was flashing so quickly I couldn’t count the calls waiting for my attention. I dropped my keys on the hall table and hit the blinking button on the answering machine so I could listen on my way to the kitchen.
I hadn’t planned on being gone so long, so even though I had expected to have to throw out the milk and the salad mix and a couple of other things, I had thought there’d be something I could eat in the refrigerator. Now I had my doubts. As I investigated the freezer hoping for a pizza or some frozen pasta, I could hear the answering machine finish rewinding itself and the click it made as it switched to playing.
“Ella? It’s Katie. I was expecting you to sub for Camilla today.”
“Ella, how are you dear? Are you back from your trip yet?”
“There was a budget meeting and Brown’s on the warpath today. He’s trying to cut staff, so try to take the next job they call you for.”
“Ella, honey, just calling to check on you.”
“Ella, Mr. Brown’s going to call. You’d better have a good excuse for disappearing ready for him.”
“Ella, you said you’d only be gone a couple of weeks. Just call so I know you’re all right.”
“Miss Peterson, you have not accepted an assignment in three weeks. That and the altercation with Miss Simmons makes me question your dedication to this institution. Therefore, we are terminating y
our employment. Come clean out your locker.”
“Ella, honey, I’m getting worried. If you don’t call me today, I’m coming over.”
I gave up on the food quest and went to the phone. Hopefully I could catch my mother before she started the two-hour drive. I wasn’t looking forward to explaining my absence to my mother, but I knew I had to get that over with. I promised myself a good bit of take-out once I got through that conversation.
As soon as I dialed the number, I considered hanging up and putting it off, to get a good story I told myself. But each ring made it more likely I’d get the machine, and then she’d know I was all right and I wouldn’t have to call first thing in the morning.
Six rings. The machine would pick up after six rings. On the fifth, I heard, “Hello.”
She must have been in the basement. Too late to hang up now. “Hi, Mom. I just got in.”
I was not surprised when the first words out of her mouth were, “Where have you been? Why didn’t you call me?”
I stuck to the story I’d used when I left, “I told you I was going to stay with Joanne while she was recovering.” As I was saying it, I was hoping I’d said it was Joanne I was going to see.
“And there was no phone? No way to call me? Email? Fax?”
“Mother, you don’t even have a fax machine.”
“Fine; if you don’t want to tell me where you really were, then don’t,” and she went on to tell me about her last visit with my aunt.
But she went back to it, asking the same questions again when she’d finished her story, and again after I’d told her my dinner plans, and kept asking them until I gave in. I told her more or less what happened, starting with the library mirror and Nathaniel in the cage, skipping over the knight completely, making it sound like I’d only watched the final battle, and giving an edited version of the rest.
Mother listened in silence. When I was done, I could hear her doing some deep breathing, probably trying to sort out what I’d just told her. And then she said, “Fine, don’t tell me,” and started telling me about the new coffee spot opening on her walking route. She let the subject of my disappearance drop for good.
With the hardest conversation over, I dug out my take-out menus and treated myself to a delivered gourmet pizza, which I ate in the dining room after I cleared the table of mail and library books. I spent the rest of the evening in the living room, not watching whatever was on the television, slowly working on the knee socks that had been through the mirror and back with me. Knitting them reminded me of the adventure. I didn’t want to think about how I’d feel when they were done, since they were my last link to Nathaniel and the rest of Greenhaven.
*
I woke up the next morning expecting to feel soft fur against my side, when I didn’t, I felt around for it. That’s when I realized I was comfortable, in a bed, with a mattress. I opened my eyes, expecting to see bed curtains and maybe Clara with some tea. Then I looked around and I realized where I was. I resisted the temptation to stay in bed and try to get the feeling back. I knew I had tea in the kitchen, and I had seen a box of pancake mix in the cupboard. Breakfast might be possible.
The kitchen looked friendly as I put the kettle on and got down the mix. It only needed water, so I was in business. While I mixed up the batter and waited for my pan to heat up, I considered what I’d do with my day. Obviously, there were no subbing jobs today. It would have been a good day to have caught up on my sleep, but I was already awake and my pancakes were already half-done. So I would go and clear out my locker in the teachers’ lounge. That was a good project. After all, I wanted to get everything back in order as quickly as possible; at least, that’s what I told myself as I finished my breakfast and put on my work clothes. It had absolutely nothing to do with needing a distraction or something to keep my mind off Nathaniel. I repeated that to myself all the way to the school. It didn’t help that my jacket had a faux suede collar that brushed my cheek at odd moments and caressed my neck as I leaned into the trunk to get out the plastic storage boxes I’d brought.
Katie Crawford was planning her Computer Science midterms at one of the computer terminals and smiled at me when I unlocked my locker for the last time. “Sorry I couldn’t warn you sooner. They discovered they needed more money for spring sports when you weren’t here, and of course it was on the day Mr. Brown was on a rampage about you not taking any jobs. I think Mrs. Simmons called about a problem with Louise in the Math Department that morning, so you were on his mind.”
“Thanks for the effort.”
Katie shrugged. “Not that leaving here is that bad.”
I grinned as I filled my box.
I was trying to get the lid to snap in place without breaking the glass in my picture frame when Mr. Brown came by. “Miss Peterson, I see you’ve come back.”
I nodded at my box, reminding myself I needed to salvage what I could for a reference. “Just clearing the last of my things.”
“I was very disappointed in your behavior, but I have considered your record with this district, and I am willing to overlook this anomaly and offer you your job again.” Mr. Brown made it sound like he was doing me a great favor.
I looked around the teachers’ office, safe, familiar, and miserable. I had crossed a cursed forest and helped defeat a wizard. It made my decision easier. “That’s very kind of you, but I’m sure you have already made other arrangements. Thanks anyway.”
Mr. Brown went on without hearing me. “I suppose it’s too late for you to start today. Put your things back, and tomorrow you can get back to work. Leonard has jury duty ,so we’ll need someone to cover physical education, and Kate has a workshop next week, so we’ll need a week of Computer Science.”
I pressed the lid into place. It made a loud snap as it locked. “No, Mr. Brown. It’s very kind of you, but I will not be coming back. Thank you anyway.”
Mr. Brown looked shocked that I had turned down the job, then glared at me, and I had the definite impression that the other arrangements were not going well. Mr. Brown went to grumble at someone else.
Katie grinned. “I’d love to do that myself. Are you going to be OK?”
I nodded. “I’ll be fine.” And I realized I meant it.
Chapter 33
A month passed uneventfully, even by my pre-mirror standards. Once I’d gotten the explanations over with, things started to fall back into place. I didn’t think anyone I’d had to lie to knew my college friends, so the chances of someone talking to Joanne and catching me were slim, especially since I stayed very vague about what exactly Joanne was recovering from. My finances were in fine shape. I would have said I didn’t know what adventurers did before e-billing, if I had had anyone to say it to. I had gotten over losing my job as soon as I’d returned to the teacher’s lounge to clear out my locker. Compared to the moody and nit-picking Mr. Brown, the inattentive jocks, and the openly hostile cliques, Nathaniel at his most condescending seemed a joy.
Mom really did let the subject of where I’d been drop. I think she was more worried about how listless I was becoming. It came on so gradually, it took me a long time to realize it, but I was losing interest in everything around me. My routine seemed dull and pointless. I would lie in bed and stare at the ceiling, not able to sleep, not wanting to get up. I couldn’t even settle on a book to read. Everyone seemed to think it was the loss of my job that was doing it. I went along with that story, even though I knew better. I finally broke down and bought myself a black faux fur throw. As long as I was sleeping under it, I was able to sleep through the night, even if I did spend a good bit of the night going over the last part of the journey, in the carriage, analyzing everything I had said and wondering if it had sounded as stupid at the time, worrying if my clumsy curtsies had looked as awkward as I had thought, and trying to remember exactly how Nathaniel had sounded.
But, whatever the cause, I knew I had to do something before this malaise became a full-blown depression. I couldn’t walk around with a faux fur blanke
t thrown over my shoulders.
A vacation. It came to me as I sat curled up in front my living room fireplace with a cup of tea, staring at the small opening at the end of the toes of the second sock that was waiting to be grafted closed. A change of scene. That was what I needed. Someplace new and different. A little adventure. I went to my bookcase and took down every travel book I could find, spreading them out on the floor around me and sitting in the middle of them.
The problem was where to go. I had always wanted to go to England, but as I flipped through those books, every picture of a castle made me wonder how Nathaniel was. The stately homes reminded me of my time with Feste at the manor house. I did no better with my books on France. I finally came to the decision that I could not go anywhere with a castle. That ruled out every place in every travel book I owned.
So I found myself back at the library, this time the travel section, looking for someplace I could go with no reminders of panthers, castles, or manor houses. I had fought the temptation to dress up, to put on a pretty blouse, or even a summer dress. It was just the library, nothing fancy, nothing special. I was not going to meet anyone. Jeans and a T-shirt would do just fine, although I did pick my most flattering sapphire blue shirt.
I could see the reading area as I pulled books from the shelves. The mirror was still there, just as it had been. That surprised me a bit; I’d half expected it to be gone when Nathaniel and Feste no longer needed it. I tried to keep my mind on the books. Maybe the mirrors in other worlds like this one hadn’t been enchanted, only the one Feste passed through. Maybe I could go someplace in Canada.
There was a footstool in the corner again. For a crazy moment, I thought of Feste, but this one was red and shabby, and anyway, Feste was no longer enchanted. I went back to the books. I took down a couple on Niagara Falls and flipped through, checking for castles.
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