by J. H. Hayes
As they left the gathering area, Azaria craned her neck, searching in all directions for one other person. She finally spotted him standing off to the side. Her heart racing, wishing she could run to him, she set her emotions in check, settling instead for a warm smile. When his sparkling, hazel-shaded eyes smiled back at her, she knew nothing had occurred during her lengthy absence that would change what they’d begun. They would continue where they'd left off.
As she walked with her father up a rather steep hill to the southwest, Azaria demanded to know what had happened to her mother, as if she expected him to account for the changes in her appearance. She knew her tone was overly interrogative, but her panic had only grown as she'd sat with her sickly mother after her return, afraid to even leave her side. It was only her deep need to question him that compelled her to leave her mother at all.
They stopped when they reached the top of the hill, and stood atop a bluff overlooking a wide valley below. A small pack of red deer grazed beneath them and farther off a much, much larger herd of aurochs was slowly passing through. Azerban made a mental note to inform Irizahner, Dogahn's father, of the sighting. He was planning a hunt for the end of summer, and would appreciate the information. Above, a small black mass appeared on the horizon. Azerban watched it grow as he pondered a reply to his daughter's question. The size of the cloud was increasing rapidly as it approached them, a formless mass, now taking up a good part of the sky. He watched as it approached the setting sun and then eclipsed it, blocking all its life-giving rays. The giant shadow the cloud created fell on them and the sky darkened. Several very long moments passed while Azerban stood speechless, awe-struck in its shadow, although he'd seen the same phenomenon before. Then, just as abruptly as it had come, the mass passed the blazing, golden orb and diminished as the infinite flock of small avians continued their migration.
"She’s ill, Azaria," he answered, as gently as he could manage. "Her little cough has grown, and is now overwhelming her. It drains her energy and saps her strength. I'm grateful you're finally back, but I'm afraid your stay will be brief. I wish I didn't need to ask this of you, but you must return to the Temple and speak to Fahim. She’s our most skilled healer, as you know, an expert in treating the ill. I need her guidance. The remedies Takur and I have tried have done little to help her. I'm at a loss as to what to try next."
Azaria was speechless at first, worried sick and helplessly frustrated. "Of course I’ll go father. I'll leave right now. I can be there and back before the sun rises." She turned and walked toward the heart of their encampment, her head down in consternation.
"Azaria, you can't go tonight. You’ll leave at dawn."
"Why, father? We need help now!" she said, turning back to him.
"There's too much danger, Azaria. Predators prowl at night. They'll have no inhibitions in attacking under the curtain of night's shadow - even on a well-traveled path."
Azaria, realizing the truth in her father's words, acceded reluctantly. All at once, the built up emotions of the past few suns, added together with the shock of returning to find her mother ill and the frustration of helplessness, exploded in an outpouring of tears. She threw her arms around his neck, letting his sturdy arms envelop her.
Before the sun had risen the next morning, Azaria had memorized every word her father had told her. They went over the instructions again before she left, to make sure she had it right. Azaria needed no refreshing.
She ran with the wind, starting off at a much faster clip than she had during the Long Run. She assumed she wouldn't be able to keep it up for the whole run and slowed slightly to pace herself, but kept on at a rate that would’ve far outpaced every other runner. I can rest when I get there. I'm sure it will take Fahim a while to come up with instructions and then I'll pace myself on the way back - if I need to. Tonight I can sleep, but now I must fly. I wish Fahim was correct, she thought ironically as she bounded forward. I wish I was a Bird-Runner, and could sprout the sparrow's wings.
When she arrived, just as the sun was showing itself, both Izyl and Fahim were shocked, questioning her more than once on exactly when she’d left and how she could’ve made the run so quickly. In a way though, Fahim wasn’t surprised. She’d suspected her Second’s daughter was special. The feat only affirmed her belief the Watchers loved her and that a great destiny awaited her.
Azaria set out again after the sun had passed its highest point, a treated leather pouch filled with precious medicine in her grasp and a soaring, grateful spirit in her heart. Her pace nearly matched the one she started out with that morning, but she soon realized she’d not be able to sustain it. Her earlier courageous sprint had come with a price. Very quickly Azaria found herself winded, standing frustrated in the middle of the path, clutching her side. It became a struggle to put each foot in front of the other, as if heavy logs had been bound to them. Each breath was tortuous, sending shivers of pain along the muscles in her lower torso.
Her mission was too important to abandon however and Azaria kept on, although the sun was already falling with almost half of the return journey remaining. A nagging fear was eating at her, growing in strength as the brightness eased. Alone, hungry and compromised was a scary proposition with a dark night threatening. A cloak of stifling panic was collapsing around her, when she was come upon by a four-legged savior - Grayfoot, who was luckily out that way hunting or scouting or doing whatever it was young dogs did. She gratefully commanded him to fetch her father and was soon greeted again by a couple of Boar Camp hunters.
The first man stopped in front of her. "It seems the great Bird-Runner has had her wings clipped, Jochan.”
Azaria ignored their laughter. “Jochan, Brutim! I’m so happy to see you. I need help!”
“Ahhh...” Brutim continued. “So she needs our aid. What should we ask of her in return?"
"Be quiet, Brutim!" the other man chided, his laugh turning to concern. "The Watchers look unkindly on those who take advantage of one in need. Brutim was only having his fun, Azaria. Are you hurt? Your father has been anticipating your return."
"Always playing the hero, Jochan! I was only joking - of course we'll help you, Azaria."
Although she knew the hunters and recognized Brutim posed little threat, she didn't like his smile nearly as much as Jochan's. "Thank you, both!" she answered. "I’m not injured so much as sore. Did you happen to see Grayfoot on your way here?"
"Was that black terror Grayfoot?" Brutim asked. "I almost put a spear through him I was so startled."
"I've never seen anything run so fast. He didn't even look at us as he ran by. Wherever he was going, he was determined," Jochan added. "And he came out of nowhere. He certainly gave me a fright too."
"Yeah, that sounds like Grayfoot," Azaria laughed.
"Get on my back, Azaria," Jochan said. "We’ll carry you the rest of the way."
It was an uncomfortable ride, but she was thankful for the two hunters’ willingness to interrupt whatever they'd been doing.
Soon Azaria saw her Father running toward them down the path, Grayfoot nipping at his heels, barking loudly. "Father!" she yelled as Jochan let her down. "Father, I have the medicine! How is mother?!"
The imposing Second Ta'araki of Boar Camp ran toward his daughter and enclosed her in his arms, easily picking her up and swinging her around. "Azaria!! You've returned."
"Father!" she exclaimed. "How is mother?"
"She's sleeping, young one, although Grayfoot woke her for a moment. But why was Jochan carrying you? Are you hurt?"
"Not injured as much as sore, Father," Azaria said, ignoring the specifics. "Jochan and Brutim were kind enough to carry me back. They deserve something in return." She turned to smile at the two bronzed men.
Jochan was the first to object. "There’s no debt, Ta'araki. Our hearts are with your hearth. We only wish we could do more. And we didn't carry her far. I'll take her the rest of the way, if you wish to bring the medicine back to your mate."
"Thank you, Jochan! A
nd Brutim!" Azerban embraced each man as he spoke their names. "I’ll take you up on that offer. There is a debt however. Call on me when you find need." He hugged his daughter once more before sprinting back to Boar Camp with the precious pouch full of medication in hand.
When Jochan let her down again, safely returned in front of her shelter, Azaria reached up to embrace each of them. "Are you sure there’s nothing I can repay you with?" she asked, looking from one to the other.
Brutim smiled and shook his head. On the way back she'd gotten to know the two mature men a little better and decided Brutim was one of those with tough talk, but a kind heart. She also noticed he was better behaved in front of her father. "And you, Jochan?" she asked, taking note of his strong facial structure and muscular build.
"No, of course not, Bird-Runner," he smiled. Azaria was surprised to find she didn't flinch at his use of the moniker. "Unless..." he began, continuing when she raised her brow expectantly, "unless I could have your arm for a dance at the Matrimonials?"
"Of course!" she responded. "I’d be honored." Azaria's smile widened as she met his gaze, not noticing the small grin on her father's face. Jochan returned the smile before the two left. She watched them go before hurrying to her mother’s side.
"Mother, mother, I'm back," she said softly.
Zephia's eyes opened slightly. "Azaria?" Her voice was hoarse, little more than a whisper. "Where've you been? I've missed you," she coughed.
"It's okay, mother. Don't speak. I'm back now." She handed her father a flat, round stone Fahim had given her, bearing a mess of incomprehensible scratches on one side. "I forgot to give this to you. Ta'araki said you’d know what it meant."
He stared at the stone intently, turning it over before he spoke, "Yes, daughter, I do. I wondered why she'd not given you instructions. I held off on administering the medicine, hoping you may have forgotten. Fetch me a cup." He mixed a small amount of the dark liquid with fresh water, sniffed at it briefly and placed his hand behind his mate's head, lifting it gently as he brought the bone cup to her lips, "Drink this, Zephia. It will be bitter, but you must take all of it."
Zephia did as commanded and coughed again, dribbling a small amount down her chin. "It's disgusting, Azerban," she exclaimed. "You’d poison an old lady? Hoping for a fresh, young woman?" Despite her obvious discomfort, Zephia smiled lovingly at her mate. Azaria watched in disbelief, astonished her mother could tease under such conditions. Seeing the tears pool in her daughter's eyes, Zephia turned to her. "You cry too easily, daughter. You must learn to be strong..." She stopped short, her face tightening into a harsh grimace as she fought to stem a new bout of coughing.
"Mother, don't try to talk," Azaria smiled. "Don't worry, I'll chase away all the young women."
Happy for the rest, Azaria sat with her mother until she slept, recounting the events of her journey. Zephia was moved and somewhat horrified her daughter had gone through so much for her. Azerban listened with pride and wonder, but turned stony-faced when he learned of the exceptional interest Fahim had displayed in his daughter’s amazing feat.
---
As the hottest suns of summer passed, the blinding orb continued to set a little farther south on the horizon with each pass. Azaria was sitting at the top of a small mound outside of Boar Camp, wishing the intense heat would break soon. She and Dogahn came to the little hill regularly now, a site young couples often visited as it afforded a spectacularly romantic view of the setting sun and was far enough away from the bustle of the three camps to allow a little privacy. She was sitting between Dogahn's legs, leaning back into him with her arms folded over his. She watched as magnificent cumulus fractus clouds transformed from white to lavender, soft raspberry and several stunning shades of orange and dull gold. It always amazed her how many different colors the Mother used to paint Her world, from the vibrant flowers in the earth and the birds on the wind to the ever changing subtler colored layers in the western evening sky. Just when she thought she'd seen them all, the Mother would present a new one, as if to remind Her Children of Her infinite power.
Azaria wondered if Dogahn was able to detect all the subtle shades. Of course she knew everyone could see the basic colors: the blue sky, the green trees, the yellow sun. But was he able to make out the little differences between the colors like she could? How the end of that cloud was just a little redder than its beginning? Of course he could, she decided - if he were paying attention. He's just more interested in my neck right now.
Dogahn’s lips were pressed against the area between her ear and shoulder. She could feel the tip of his tongue flicking lightly against the sensitive area, sending chills down her spine. She sat still with her head slightly bent, watching his right hand move down her thigh until it found the end of her bottoms. As if it had a mind of its own, it pulled the trim up a little and massaged the inside of her upper leg. She let it continue until she could bear no more, the ticklish sensations overcoming her. She swiped at his hand and when it didn't move, put her hand over it, clasping the meandering fingers within her own.
He whispered something into her ear that she didn't quite make out. She turned her head toward him and met his waiting lips with hers. She felt his tongue slip between her lips and nipped at it with the tip of hers. Azaria swiveled her torso just slightly to reduce the strain in her neck. As soon as she opened her mouth again, he entered aggressively, poking and prodding the insides of her mouth. She sucked lightly on his tongue, pulling it deeper inside, a maneuver she knew would make him recoil. She smiled to herself and let out a small titter of amusement as he pulled back. She also knew the retreat would be fleeting. Not a moment had passed before she felt his mouth again against hers. She opened it to his and met his tongue halfway, rolling it against his and delighting in the sensation. She loved kissing him, relished the tingles it produced deep within. When she was with him, all her worries over her mother's illness dissolved, if only for a few brief, wondrous moments. He possessed what she felt was a magical ability to distract her from her troubles. She could never get her mind off him. When they were separated, she pined for him to be near. Although she wasn't exactly conscious of it, those precious thoughts helped keep her concern for her mother from consuming her.
But she was also feeling less and less comfortable when they were alone. Their interludes had started out innocently, but as the summer matured, his constant and overpowering urge for her felt like a giant boulder blocking her path - their path. She didn't know what to do about it and the dilemma frightened her. Azaria felt his frustration whenever she was alone with him, even if he didn't mention it. She could feel his need pressing against her back and wished it would go away. She'd told him more than once he could go relieve himself if he wanted, but he always refused, usually making some excuse about how he could prove himself to her until she was ready. The problem was, he wanted her to be ready now. He’d asked her once if they could mate and pushed her for a good reason when she refused. He seemed to think the normal rules didn't really apply to them, since of course they’d be together forever. When she asked him what her father would think of his reasoning, he quickly dropped the subject. But the point had been breached. It was out there now. She knew what he wanted and that she couldn't give it to him. She didn't think the disagreement would break them, but still it was there and would be until they were tied. All she could think to do was to try to ignore it until it resolved itself properly.
As if his fingers could read her thoughts, she felt them migrating higher up her thigh. She kept her hand on his while it explored, a last resort guardian. It moved up to her mid-section and then back down into the dark hairs that grew just below her waist. She wasn't sure if his fingers should be there or not, but let them linger for a moment before tightening her grip on his hand. His fingers massaged the area briefly, perhaps surprised to have reached this unknown land, before sliding further down. Azaria finally grasped his hand tightly and pulled. She could feel the muscles in Dogahn's hand tighten, resisting her o
bjection. "Please," he pleaded lightly in her ear, "I just want to know what it feels like."
Azaria tolerated his trespass briefly before saying, "Dogahn, that's enough."
"Can't I play just a little while longer?" he whispered before taking the bottom part of her earlobe between his lips. When she didn't respond, he slid his hand down past the tuft of hair again.
"Aaahhhh!" Azaria exclaimed, tugging his hand back.
"What is it?" he asked. "What's wrong?"
"We've had enough fun for now," she said firmly.
"I'm sorry," he quickly said, having detected a note of anger. He shifted position to look into her eyes and could see she wasn't truly angry, perhaps more startled that he’d moved so suddenly. "I won't do it again."
"It's okay," she said, reaching over to press her lips against his. "I shouldn't have let you go so far. It's not your fault." Turning around, she lowered her body back down until all her weight was resting on his, now facing him with her legs straddling his frame. Her skirt was still hiked high on her hips and he knew the only thing between himself and the spot he was just exploring was his thin leather garment. He wished it wasn't there.
"Azaria?" he whispered after a long kiss.
"Yes?"
"Maybe you could explore me a little now..."
She leaned back, taking his head in her hands, peering into his brilliant, hazel eyes. She could see all the longing that had dammed up over the last moon, ready to burst at any moment. No, over our whole lives, she realized. Since we were children we were attracted to each other. I always wanted to play with him and he with me, even when the other boys teased him for it. Now she wanted to please him, to do what he asked.
But it was forbidden.
What she’d already allowed went too far. She had to be the one who kept some semblance of discipline between them. "You know it’s wrong, Dogahn. We've already talked about it. I'm sorry."
