by S A Clayton
“I probably shouldn’t have stayed for that whole conversation,” I admit, hoping it breaks some of the tension that’s oozing off her. My fingers trace the line of her jaw, loving the way her head absently leans into my touch. I stop at the edge of her lips, wanting to know so badly what they taste like but knowing this isn’t the time.
“You’re probably right,” she says, looking down at the one hand that still hasn’t let go of the front of her shirt. “It’s not a secret that my mother and I don’t get along. Working here has always been a point of contention, and I guess me breaking it off with Cole has pushed her over the edge.”
I say nothing as she takes a deep breath and continues.
“She feels that because he comes from money, that I’d be set for life.”
“It sounds like she wants you to have a sugar daddy.” I’m joking but from the look on her face, I’m not far off.
“It wouldn’t surprise me if that was her ultimate goal. She’s had a few of her own since my dad died. All rich, all expendable in the end.”
That’s just sad. Living your life never really loving anything, just the money they bring to the relationship.
“I should probably get going,” I whisper, watching her fingers land on my belt as I close my eyes and will myself to step away.
“Shit,” she murmurs. “Of course, you have to leave.” She pulls her hands away and ducks under my arm. “You have a game tomorrow.” She averts her eyes as she gathers up her things and I can’t help but stand there and take her in. That dark gray skirt and white blouse are every man’s fantasy and I sure as hell will be dreaming about that lace bra until I can see it again.
“Harper,” I begin, making my way closer to where she’s standing, needing to feel her one more time before I walk out that front door.
“Josh.” The tone of her voice has my heart sinking and I know she’s going to fight this again. She’s fighting this so hard and I still don’t understand why.
“I’m not going to ask you anything tonight. I think we both know that what happened tonight was amazing.”
Her eyes flare, her chest rising with the breath she takes as I grasp the sides of her face with both of my hands.
“I know you want this; I can feel it with every look and every catch of your breath when we’re together.”
“I don’t…” I place a finger on her lips, letting her know I need her to stop talking.
“What is so terrifying about being with me?”
When she doesn’t answer, I place a soft kiss on her cheek and step back.
“I will change your mind, Harper Stevens.”
And with that, I walk out of her office, down the hall and toward the front door. I take one last look behind me as I open the door, seeing Harpers head pop out of her office and I give her my best smile.
“Good night, Josh,” She blushes, the curve in her lips subtle.
“Good night, Sunshine.”
14
Harper
It’s been three days. Three days since I had a sneak preview of what Josh Anderson is capable of, and three days of dreaming about the man that has taken over every aspect of my life. The second I step foot into my apartment after work, I regret living alone. Usually, the silence is comforting at a time like this, but right now the emptiness is suffocating. All I can seem to do is think about Josh and the way his lips felt against my skin, and the way his hands felt gripping my body. I need a distraction because the more I stand here thinking about Josh, the more I want to find him and continue what we were doing the other night.
Instead of sitting around all night fantasizing and reminiscing about exactly what Josh could do if I had let him finish what he started, I decide to go to Paul’s. Maybe drinking away the memories will help me sleep tonight.
I make my way over to my closet, pulling out every piece of clothing I can see that might be appropriate for a night out on the town, but after ten minutes I sit on the edge of my bed and pick up my phone.
Do I text Mel and ask her for help? I really want her to know everything that’s going on with Josh, but even though I will tell her eventually, I don’t really feel up to it right now. So I walk back toward my small closet and pray that I can find something I can wear that isn’t full of holes or is a white T-shirt. And that’s when I see a glint out of the corner of my eye. I snag the black sequin dress and hold it up in front of me. I know for a fact that this is not my dress, and there’s only one other person this could belong to; Mel.
She must have left it here after one of our girls’ nights, and right now I'm grateful because it’s perfect. The second I put it on, I realize how short this thing is, but it’s better than everything else in my closet so I roll with it.
I get to Paul’s and groan at the number of people inside. After a few minutes, I finally find an empty seat at the bar and order a beer, needing some alcohol to start this pity session I’ve decided to throw myself. I finish my beer in record time and just as I’m about to order another beer one is set in front of me. I peer over at the bartender, confused, since I know I didn’t order it. He motions to someone behind me and for a split second my heart races, thinking Josh is here, but when I turn around, Cole is standing there with that smug look on his lying face.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” I yell as our eyes lock, and I can’t help as my entire body starts to shake with rage. My nostrils flare as he sends me that smile he thinks will melt me into submission. It used to, but all it’s doing right now is making me want to punch that look right off his face.
Seeing him here brings back all the memories I’ve been trying to forget and that’s exactly the opposite effect this night was supposed to have.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I scream again over the music as I make my way to where he’s standing.
I slowly take him in, eyeing his T-shirt and worn jeans and seeing the boy I fell in love with all those years ago. His tall stature, dark hair, and dark eyes scream mysterious and were once something I loved about him. But now? The way his eyes get darker when he looks at me, or the way his body feels against mine sends a sickening feeling through my entire body.
“Can’t a man buy a beautiful woman a drink?” he asks, looking down and taking in my dress.
I can tell from the way his eyes flare that he likes what he sees, and that look has my fingers pulling at the hem and tugging it as far as it will go.
“Not for me you can’t,” I say, crossing my arms across my chest, fully aware of how it makes my boobs look, but too pissed to care at this point. “I need you to leave, Cole. I need you to leave this bar and stop showing up everywhere I am. I mean it this time.” I go to turn back toward Mel when his fingers latch on to my arm, anchoring me in place.
“Come on baby, you know we were good together. Why can’t you remember that?” he pleads as I continue to scowl in his direction.
There is nothing this man can say that will make me go back into his arms. Nothing.
“I still love you, Harper. I would do anything for you.”
I burst out laughing because this has to be a bad joke, right? There is no way he’s being genuine right now; Cole doesn’t know the meaning of the word.
“You love me?”
I shake my head, I can’t believe I am still having this conversation. It’s like talking to a brick wall. “You don’t love me, Cole, and I don’t love you anymore. The minute I saw you between another girl’s legs, you lost me. It’s over.”
His eyes widen as if this is the first time he’s heard those words come out of my mouth.
“Harper, please,” he pleads, stroking the side of my cheeks with his thumb. “I miss you…” His eyes connect with mine and I don’t see sincerity, I see determination and I recoil, shaking my head. This is fucking insane; I need to get out of here.
“No!” I scream at him, hoping this time it starts to sink in. “You are not allowed to do that; you gave up the right to miss me.”
His eyes never leav
e mine and that’s when I reach the end of my rope.
“You know what? I can’t do this anymore. I don’t have to stand here and listen to you. You need to leave me the hell alone, okay?” I turn around, avoiding his outstretched hand, and make my way to where my purse sits at the bar. I motion to pay for the one drink I actually wanted and once that’s done I turn to leave.
As I turn and walk away, I peer behind me and see Cole standing there, eyes on me the whole time.
The air outside is cool, making me shiver since the coat I’m wearing doesn’t really cover anything that the dress doesn’t. Holding the fabric closed, I begin to walk down the road, knowing that my apartment isn’t that far away. The fresh breeze cascades over my exposed skin as I bask in the calmness of the night. Yet, when I hear those telltale footfalls sound behind me, that calm evaporates.
“Harper, please, I’m begging you for another chance.” He reaches for me but misses, his fingers barely grazing my arm as I step farther away. “You have to still love me…”
I stop in my tracks, unable to stop the cackles that leave my chest at the idea of ever loving this man again, and when I turn to tell him that, all I see is anger. Anger I never knew he possessed until I started telling him no.
“Cole, I don’t know how many times I have to say this for it to get through your thick skull, but my love for you was catapulted out the window when you cheated on me.”
I start to walk away once more when, all of a sudden, his arm wraps around my waist, pulling me flush against his chest. He doesn’t keep me there for long, he spins me, pinning me against the darkened building behind us. The coarse texture of the brick cuts through the fabric of my jacket and I grit my teeth at the sting. His face lowers, inches from mine and with wide eyes, I watch as his hand comes up and grasps my neck.
“You think you can just walk away from me?” he snarls, becoming a stranger right before my eyes. “You listen to me, you little bit—”
My fist works of its own accord as it connects with the side of his face. The impact of my knuckles hitting his face takes a few seconds to register before the blinding pain surges up my arm.
Fuck! They really don’t tell you how much punching someone hurts…
“You piece of shit!” I snarl as I move away from him. “You are going to listen, because I’m sick of your shit. No one touches me without my permission, even you… especially you,” I grit through clenched teeth as I grip my bruised hand to my chest and hope it’s not broken. “Yes, we dated, yes you cheated on me, and fucking yes that gives me the right to deny you whatever I want.”
His eyes narrow, his hands shaking at his sides, but I keep going.
“As of this moment, we are DONE. You are not to come near me again, got it?”
His eyes bore into mine, no emotion registering on his face.
“I will press charges next time,” I say with as much strength as I can muster in this moment, but that sly smile fits over his features and the uncertainty settles over me once again.
“Press charges?” He smirks, getting closer and closer before he stops, bending down and looking me straight in the eyes. “You remember who my father is, right?”
My entire body freezes as a cold sense of dread spreads through every limb.
“Ahh, it looks like she remembers…” He kisses my forehead as I recoil, my head hitting the brick wall behind me, sending white dots over my vision. “Oh and just in case you get any ideas, what you just did? Punching me?” His face leans down as his eyes sear into mine. “That’s called assault, baby. Wouldn’t want to tarnish that perfect persona you have going on with a criminal record.”
I freeze, realizing he has a very good point.
He gives me one last smile before he turns and leaves, the dull throb of my knuckles the only reminder that I actually stood up for myself. Because right now I feel about four feet tall. How did that just happen? How did he take away all of my power with a single sentence?
How could I be stupid enough to think I could threaten him with something like that? Of course, his father would protect him.
That was so fucking stupid.
15
Josh
“Have a good night,” Henry calls from his office as I make my way to the front door. I decided to come sign some paperwork tonight since I had the time, and ever since my disaster of a game, I haven’t had much of that to go around.
As I walk outside, I stop, taking a deep breath, hearing footsteps behind me.
“Josh?” Harper’s voice echoes in the night as I close the door and turn, shocked that she’s here. “What are you doing here so late?” she asks, looking down, and my eyes can’t help but do the same.
“I came to see Henry.”
The confused look in her eyes is adorable, and so I give her a small smile.
“To sign some paperwork, you know the boring stuff that you leave for Henry.” I wink, knowing it’s actually the opposite.
She gives me a small laugh and I bask in it.
“So you’re going through with the deal?”
I nod. Will asked me the same thing this morning while we were practicing. I was told early on in my career to be mindful of small business contracts, but to me, this was a no-brainer. Stevens Place might be small in comparison to some other contracts, but they are a staple in Toronto. They love their clients and more importantly they love baseball, which is something that will never waver for me, and seeing that same dedication in someone else is refreshing.
“Yeah, I thought it was a good move, and I can’t deny the perks are pretty good…” I wink, loving the blush that’s dusting her cheeks.
My eyes can’t help but take her in once again, but this time in more detail. The heat of my gaze has her fidgeting and to be honest, I love the way she gets nervous around me. If I knew for one second that she wasn’t into this, I would leave. Yet, seeing the heat in her gaze as I take her in, I know she wants this, almost as much as I do.
When a gust of wind comes and whips her hair across her face, her hand comes up to touch her face, I suck in a breath, noticing the blood on her knuckles.
“Jesus, Harper, what the hell happened?” I growl, stepping toward her and gently taking the exposed knuckles and lightly brushing my fingers over them. When she flinches, pulling away from me, my eyes flick to hers.
“Nothing happened.” She averts her gaze, my first clue that she’s lying, but I can also see the fear in her eyes and at that moment a pit forms in my stomach.
“Sunshine, did someone do this to you?” My concern is thick as her gaze turns grateful, which sends a sense of calm over my entire body.
“Actually, I did this to someone else.” She smiles, almost like she’s waiting for me to laugh, but I don’t.
The idea of someone threatening her to the point she had to defend herself makes me angrier than I like to admit.
“I went to a bar with Mel and Cole showed up.”
I say nothing because as much as I want to know what happened, I have to restrain myself. But I don’t have to wait long before she answers that question for me.
“He wanted to get back together and didn’t like the fact that I said no.”
“Sunshine, that could have been so much worse,” I admit, my mind playing out all the other scenarios that could have played out. Before she can respond, I’m in front of her, both my hands cradling her face as I touch my forehead to hers. “You have no idea how much worse that could have been…” I admit, not knowing if I’m talking to her or myself. I know I’m trying to reassure myself that she’s fine and standing in front of me, but her hands come to rest on top of mine and her eyes lift.
All I want to do is kiss her.
“I’m okay. I showed him the business end of my fist,” she whispers, that slight smile killing me with every passing second. She keeps that up, I won’t be able to keep myself in check much longer.
“We need to get you cleaned up before this gets infected.” My hands leave her face as I cradle her
s in mine. “Were you headed home?” I ask as her eyes travel to our hands. I can tell she’s in her own little world right now, so I squeeze her hand as her eyes jerk up to mine.
“Um, yes. I’m going home. Don’t worry, I have a first aid kit and everything,” she says way too quickly. I can see the flight in her eyes, and that sense of panic hits my gut once more.
“That’s good,” I say, coming up with a plan on the spot. “Because taking care of these cuts without one would be pretty hard.” That smile is back, but that nervousness is still creeping up the edges of her body, and I can’t have that.
“So, I’ll see you later. Better get home before I decide to punch any more men.” She chuckles to herself and starts to walk away.
I lightly grasp her arm and turn her back toward me. “Did you really think that I would let you walk home alone after what you just told me?”
She shrugs and I know that’s exactly what she thought would happen. Not on my watch.
“Plus,” I say, taking her hand in mine and leading her away from the gym and down the street. “I’m an expert at first aid, I think for safety reasons I should be the one to take care of you.” I don’t let her talk me out of it. I just keep on walking, her hand gripping mine with all her might.
“That’s either extremely nice of you or one of the worst pickup lines I’ve ever heard.”
“I’ll let you decide which one it is,” I tease, winking as I drape my arm around her shoulder, letting her lead me toward her apartment.
“Where’s your first aid kit?” I ask as she turns the key to open her front door. As it opens, I get a full look at her space and I can’t help the smile. It’s so Harper. It feels lived in and homey with a sectional couch in the corner that sits in front of a very large TV. I secretly wonder if she watched me play on that TV. The walls are painted white, yet pictures adorn every spare inch, which are comprised of mostly art but I see a few family photos scattered around.
