Instinct

by Sherrilyn Kenyon

  She laughed. "You're so sweet and naive. It's what I love best about you."

  Yeah, right. That, he knew better. "Naive" was a word no one in their right mind could ever apply to Nicholas Ambrosius Aloysius Gautier.

  "Please. I was born jaded." With serious trust issues where the world was concerned. No one pulled the wool over his eyes.

  A slow, insidious smile curved Livia's lips. "That's what you think. But trust me, you're way too innocent for your own good."

  "How so?"

  "Bubba said he'd never hurt you--that he'd always look out for you, no matter what, and now he's dating your mother. How do you think that'll end? He put his own selfishness above your best interest. Sooner or later, all things come to an end. He will hurt you. You both know that."

  Stepping away from Nick, she bit her lip seductively. "When this affair with your mother implodes ... and it will ... you won't ever speak to him again. Because it'll be too painful for your mother for you to have a relationship with him. So the only real father you've ever known will be ripped out of your life. Bubba knows that. You know that. Maybe it's what he really wanted. Maybe he wanted you gone and just didn't want to come out and say it."

  Those words slammed into Nick. Could there be any truth to that? Could Bubba truly want him out of his life?

  Was it possible that he was nothing but a nuisance to the big guy?

  "And what about Mark?" she asked. "Do you really think he enjoys playing babysitter to you all the time? They're grown men, Nick. You're just an annoying little kid. And you're not even theirs. You're nothing to them. Just a cling-on they can't get rid of."

  He ground his teeth as those words stung him hard. She was right. He'd had those fears in the past, but hadn't wanted to believe them.

  Now ...

  "Then there's your boss, Kyrian. The two-thousand-year-old Greek general who hid that truth from you of what he really was. Servant to the goddess Artemis. And don't get me started on the secrets Acheron keeps. He's not just a Dark-Hunter, Nick. Nor an Atlantean. He's an ancient god. Yet he would die before he ever allowed you to know that about himself. And when the day comes and you find out the truth, you will become his worst enemy. He will condemn you to death for your knowledge. And that curse is what will set you down the path you can't divert. That very path you're trying so hard to run from."

  A shiver rolled down his spine as she confirmed something about the ancient Atlantean he'd long suspected. Something that Acheron had deflected with great skill anytime Nick had tried to ask about it.

  "As I said, you are surrounded by liars you can't trust. People who constantly lie to your face. They all keep massive secrets. Why? Because they're not your friends, in spite of what you think. They don't care about you, Nick. Not really. If they did, they'd tell you everything and keep nothing from you. But they don't want you to be close to them. They don't want you to know them or the truth, because you mean nothing where they're concerned. You are nothing."

  The truth of those words bit him deep inside his heart. But he refused to let her know she'd hit her mark with them. He wasn't the kind of guy to ever give that power to another person. He kept his hurt to himself. Only Kody and his mother were allowed to see his pain. "I need to check on Zavid."

  "Someone else who speaks one truth to your face and another behind your back."

  "What?" he gasped before he could stop himself. "What does he say?"

  "He doesn't trust you, either. He thinks you're weak. A mama's boy who can't tie his shoes without her help. He pities you."

  Offended, Nick glared at Livia. So much for keeping his emotions in. But this ... this had blindsided him.

  He'd had no idea that Zavid had felt that way, especially since Nick had saved his life.

  "I'm not the one who said it." She blinked at him innocently. "I'm just telling you this for your own good. You should know how they really feel. What they say when you're not around. I would never treat you that way. I think too much of you to do that."

  Biting her lip, she stepped closer to him. "I know what it's like to be alone and to have no one to trust. To have nowhere to turn." She stood on her toes to kiss him.

  Nick stepped back before their lips met. While Livia was a very attractive female, she wasn't the kind of girl he was interested in and he'd never hurt Kody like that. He wasn't that kind of guy and he had no intention of ever being that type of slime ball. Hearts were sacred things and when someone entrusted theirs to you, it was your duty to keep faith. Nick had no intention of breaking his honor for anything. "I need to find out why Zavid left Caleb alone."

  "Malachai!"

  He ignored her call and kept going. Every molecule of his body told him to put as much distance as he could between them, as quickly as possible.

  For once he listened. He had to think through this without hearing her voice in his head, alongside the ones that told him how worthless he was.

  Nick ran the rest of the way down the stairs and out the door, looking for Zavid. The moment his feet hit the street outside the protected barrier, the Memitim attacked like screaming, love-sick fangirls all over their latest fixation.

  Cursing, he threw his hand up and zapped them away from him. "Demons, please! I ain't your hell-monkey. Really don't have time for this!"

  The one nearest him had the nerve to hiss like a cat. "The Malachai protects Malphas? Why? We served you well. And here you dare to side with our enemy after he betrayed us all? How could you?"

  Nick was aghast at his fury. "First, you didn't serve me. You fought for some ancestor I don't even know the name of. Dude, for real? Put that card back in the deck. It ain't gonna win this round. Second, Caleb fell in love and walked away from that war you're talking about. Who can blame him for that? You're the ones who came at him when you should have just left him in peace to live with his wife and be happy. If you didn't want him to kick your butts, you should have stayed at home. That's on you. Not him."

  The leader Memitim cawed loudly. "He knew our secrets to betray them to our enemies. We could not suffer him to live with such knowledge when he could destroy us."

  "And you knew his.... Assured mutual destruction. Again, you could have chosen to leave him alone. Yet you didn't. Fair's fair. You came at him. He defeated you. Now grow a set and deal. Let him be."

  They rose up again into a dark cyclone to attack Caleb's barrier. But at least they were no longer after him.

  Nick wasn't sure if he should be happy or not.

  Weary and sick, he sighed at their stubborn determination. "Do I have to banish you back to whatever hole you crawled out of? For real? This is what you want to do with your freedom?"

  Their answer was to continue their assault. So, yeah. This was what they wanted to do with their newfound lives.

  It made no sense to him whatsoever. Why would they continue down this path when they could do something positive or constructive?

  Like get a beignet. Grab some coffee.

  Get a girl and have some happy private adult fun time.

  Why choose death when they could choose life? Weren't there girl raven-demons for them to pursue? Really?

  Stunned at the waste, Nick stood back in the storm to watch them as they flew in wave after wave against Caleb's protection barrier. He wasn't sure if he should be appalled or impressed by their raw, single-minded determination.

  It also said a lot about Caleb's power that it could hold even while he was drained. Still ... he felt bad for both sides. The Memitim for not being able to let it go after all these centuries, and Caleb for not being able to move on because of their obstinacy.

  Why dwell on the past when you have a perfectly good tomorrow to look forward to screwing up? Mark's favorite saying went through his head. There was definitely something to be said for that. Especially while watching them pursue their madness. They were so focused on Caleb that they'd destroyed themselves trying to strike at him.

  Was it worth it?

  Definitely not.

 

Gah, I hope I'm never that stupid. 'Cause let's face it. I basically hog all the dumb, most days.

  But there was nothing he could do to help them with their idiocy today. And right now, he had a renegade demon who might be neck-deep in trouble and needing his help to locate. A mom to guard. Funky weather to avoid.

  And a strange mystery to solve.

  He stared at the Memitim. How do I get rid of those? And again, he had that off, hollow feeling in his gut that something wasn't right.

  That his time was running out.

  All of a sudden, the Memitim scattered as if terrified. Yeah, that had to be a really bad sign.

  Nick cringed at the omen as more lightning flashed, narrowly missing him. That was stunning, but not as much as the beautiful teenaged girl who stepped out of it and eyed him with great curiosity.

  Completely dry in spite of the weather, she had rich caramel skin with dark hair that fell in intricate braids around a perfect face. But it wasn't her beauty that made his senses stir, it was the amount of power that emanated from her. This was a preter of unparalleled Source power. If she announced herself to him as Azura, he wouldn't be surprised.

  Her powers were that strong.

  Dressed in a short skirt and a halter, she met his stunned expression with a shrug as she approached him with a slow, seductive walk. "You wanted them gone. They're gone now."

  Yeah, but he wasn't quite sure he should be thanking her for it. Or running in the opposite direction and screaming like a kindergartener on Benadryl who'd just met Freddy Krueger.

  His gut voted for the boogeyman bolt.

  "Who are you?"

  She smiled. "Don't you know?"

  "Not a clue."

  She paused beside him to sniff at his shoulder and hair. Kind of creepy. Yeah, he was leaning even more toward the boogeyman scenario. "You are the Malachai?"

  Nick hesitated at her tone that was almost insulting. Even so, when a being this powerful asked that question, it was never a good idea to give a straight answer. "Uh ... Malamaybe?"

  Cupping his face, she pressed her cheek to his and took a deep breath. "You are not Monakribos." That was the name of the first Malachai, who'd been cursed ... she must know a lot about his kind to have the given name of his ancestor. Most had no clue about that.

  Or, like Xev and Caleb, she was older than dirt.

  "I'm..." Nick hesitated. Technically, he was the Ambrose Malachai, but he was superstitious about taking that name yet. Even though it was correct, it just seemed like a really bad idea to call down that kind of mojo right now. The longer he could keep from becoming the monster he was destined to be, the better. "Nick."

  Pulling back, she curled her lip. "That's a stupid name for a Malachai. What fool named you?"

  "Excuse me? My mother is a wonderful lady."

  Her brow shot up and Nick remembered too late that Malachais were supposed to hate their mothers. Not defend them.

  "You still haven't told me who you are."

  Cocking her head, she studied him with a scowl. "How can a Malachai so powerful not know me on sight?"

  Maybe because he still hadn't quite mastered all of his powers? But again, he wasn't about to own up to that when dealing with someone who could mop the street with him.

  "Are you Yrre?" It seemed the most reasonable guess that she'd be the rider who'd almost mowed him down in school. It made sense. They were both dressed in white, came out of nowhere, and left him totally baffled.

  She shook her head and laughed. "Do I look like that cow-faced dog?"

  Uh, no. She looked pretty hot, actually. Hot enough to get him into serious trouble if Kody caught her standing this tight to his personal space.

  Nick stepped back.

  She followed. With an adoring expression, she brushed her hand through his hair. "Do you not feel your connection to me?"

  He only felt a traitorous part of his body that wanted to be connected to her. But he knew better than to listen to that part of himself. It had a mind of its own that could get him into all kinds of nightmares if he let it. "Not sure what you mean."

  "Yes, you do. You know exactly of what I speak. You feel the blood that tells you who I am."

  "Nope. I feel nothing." Except the urge to get away from her before she got him into all kinds of trouble no amount of apologizing could get him out of--not even a shiny object from Jared's. He'd meant what he said. He would never, ever break Kody's trust or her heart.

  Not intentionally.

  Nick froze mid-step as a peculiar image went through his mind. He saw the girl in ancient armor, wrapped around a multiheaded dragon. An inherited memory that came from one of his Malachai predecessors. In that instant, he knew the goddess's name. "Tiamat."

  She inclined her head to him. "See, you do know me."

  Sort of. And one thing he knew about her ... "You're supposed to be dead."

  Her laughter rang like music in his ears. "No one can kill something as powerful as I. You only change my state of being. So why have you summoned me from my slumber, Malachai?"

  A chill went down his spine at that question. "I didn't summon you."

  Scowling, she gently fingered his cheek. "It's always about you, Malachai. Haven't you learned that yet? Besides, who else would dare disturb me?"

  "Someone with a death wish?"

  She laughed aloud at that. "You're a cheeky one, aren't you?"

  Not at the moment. At the moment, though, it pained him to admit it even to himself, he was rather afraid. This was one of the most dangerous of the chaos gods. She had birthed more monsters than Echidna.

  Come to think of it, she might have even birthed Echidna. He never could keep all that mythology straight.

  Lowering her head, she stepped back as if she was listening to the aether voices that constantly drove Nick crazy whenever he tried to understand them. Her eyes glowed a deep, scary red. She dropped her hand from his face. "As much as I would love to stay and chat, I have much to do and little time to work it."

  Before he could blink, she was gone.

  Rain poured down over him as soon as she was gone. Crap. He had a bad, bad feeling deep in the pit of his stomach.

  Suddenly, everything around him stopped. Even the rain. No. Not stopped. It froze in place like a painting. Nick turned a slow circle as he tried to make sense of what was happening.

  He felt so out of sync with everything. Out of time. It was like being in the Nether Realm or the darkness that existed between dimensions. Only he wasn't lost or misplaced. He was in his time and correct plane.

  Just not lined up right.

  Like a cog that was ever so slightly misaligned. And then he felt it ... that presence that had been missing for so long. "Ambrose?"

  "Find the Eye." It was the faintest of whispers.

  "What? What eye?"

  "The Eye of Ananke." Ambrose appeared to him as nothing more than a mere translucent shadow with red eyes. The only way he knew for a fact it was him was the faint outline of Artemis's double bow-and-arrow mark on his cheek. It marked the spot where the Greek goddess would one day remove his soul from him.

  That familiar red demonic gaze burned into Nick. "I shouldn't have tried to reset the past. We were born a damned abomination that should never have been conceived."

  His breathing labored, Ambrose fell to his knees on the sidewalk beside him. He looked up with an expression of woeful abandon. "Listen to me, Nick. You have to find the Eye and follow your true course. The one we were meant to follow before I screwed up so badly. Fast! It's the only hope we have. You have to stay true to our original course. Trust me on this. Please! Do not stray from our path!"

  For a moment, his eyes turned to the shade of blue Nick saw reflected in a mirror whenever he gazed in one. "Of all the mistakes I've made, the one I regret most is robbing you of the years where you were able to dream of normality. At your age, I knew nothing of Kyrian's world. Of Dark-Hunters, ancient gods, and Were-Hunters. I was just a stupid kid, with stupid kid dreams." He laughed bitterly. "I thought I was going to be a fancy uptown lawyer. That I'd have a wife and kids..." His eyes returned to red. "I'm so sorry I took that from you. I just wanted to save us. Give us something to hope for."

  "Wide is the gate that leads to destruction," Nick said, quoting his mother's favorite saying, "and many are those who enter through it. But the gate is narrow and the way is straight that leads to life, and few are those who find it."

  Ambrose snorted. "It's why there's a highway to hell, but only a single stairway to heaven." He looked up at Nick. "I've lost the war. By fighting, I only made it worse. Find the Eye and reset our course. We have to go back in order to move forward. It's the only hope we have. The Riders are out and they are about to take you down, little brother. Move fast, with purpose, or we're both lost. There's so much you have to do, that I can't even begin to tell you how to fix it. But the Eye can." He rose slowly to his feet. "I won't be able to help after this. You're on your own."

  Nick gave a short half laugh. "I'm good with that. I came into this world alone, and that's how I'll leave it.... I was born standing up and talking back. Cajun proud and Cajun strong from my first breath to my last."

  Wings shot out of Ambrose's back as he changed from human to full Malachai form. His skin marbled red and black as his eyes turned to full-on pret. Fangs and claws flashing, he grabbed Nick's jaw in his fist and tilted his head until they locked gazes. "We are Malachai above all else. Now and forever. Never forget that." Throwing his head back, he let loose a horrific blast of blue-tinged fire toward the sky before he vanished.

  Shaken and trembling, Nick stood there as everything returned to normal and the rain again saturated him. But in his mind, he saw what Ambrose did. Nick saw the bloody future that awaited them, and there in the cold, winter rain, he refused to be intimidated. He refused to allow fate and Ambrose to win.

  I will not become you, old man.

  He would find this Eye and figure out where Ambrose and the others had gone wrong. He would stop whatever hell-monkey was currently loose and messing with his friends and family.

  But most of all, he would make sure that he never fulfilled the destiny that said he would destroy this world. Kody believed in the prophecy that said he was the Malachai who would save their line. And he believed in her.

  Since the day he was born, he'd been defying the odds. Today was not the day to stop that trend. Unlike Ambrose, he wasn't about to give up or give in.

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