by Tamryn Tamer
“You’ve been dosing my food with fucking poison?” Slade said as they turned another corner.
“It’s perfectly safe!” Hestia said, pivoting down a dark alleyway, gradually getting closer to the northwest wall. “It’s no different than when I was giving you Green Poppy, Wyrmtongue, and Vilethorn.”
“Those are also fucking poisonous! How long have you been poisoning me?” Slade said, accessing his abilities and seeing that over the last month he’d built up resistances and immunities to at least dozen different poisons and paralytics.
“I’m not poisoning you!” Hestia said defensively, stopping in her tracks as she stared him down. The guards rushed around the corner and fired off a volley of magic and arrows that Slade and Commander Grey deflected. “I would never poison you! It’s medicine!”
“Fucking tell me then!” Slade shouted.
“Now’s not the time for this,” Commander Grey said while shoving Hestia along. The elf angrily glared at Slade before reluctantly continuing toward the northwest wall.
“What was that look for?” Slade asked angrily. “You’re not allowed to be angry at me! You’re the one that’s been poisoning me!”
“Commander Grey,” Hestia said. “Tell Baron Slade that I’m not talking to him until he stops being mean.”
“I’m not being mean!” Slade shouted.
“She did save your life back there,” Commander Grey said. “And she is still saving you now. And you’re yelling at her for…”
“Fucking poisoning me!” Slade yelled.
“She doesn’t know any better,” Commander Grey laughed. “The crazy elf fucking doses people. You’ve known this for almost as long as you’ve known her.”
“But it’s fucking poison!” Slade said through clenched teeth.
“So’s alcohol but I don’t see you bitching at the bartender!” Hestia snapped angrily.
“The bartender isn’t secretly giving me alcohol!” Slade shouted as they reached a warehouse.
“This is why I didn’t tell you that I was giving you medicine!” Hestia shouted as she turned around and threw two emerald orbs at the alleyway’s exit, forcing the royal guards to backtrack and find an alternative route. “Everybody gets angry when you give them medicine!”
“It’s not medicine!” Slade growled as his heart continued pounding as if trying to break through his ribcage. “It’s poison!”
“Ninety percent of medicine is poison!” Hestia growled back. “I know what I’m doing! And you’re lucky that you’re all hopped up on Ragebloom or else I’d be very angry with you for yelling at me!”
“Hopped up on Ragebloom?” Slade said, following Hestia inside the warehouse. “I would still be angry if not for the Ragebloom!”
“The exit is in here,” Hestia said.
“Hold on,” Slade said, realizing there was only one entrance to the place. He smiled while turning toward Hestia. “Give me all of that fucking poison you have left.”
“All of it?” Hestia asked. “Okay.”
She nervously handed Slade nine emerald orbs and several other vials of various dangerous poisons. He was a bit disappointed that he wouldn’t be able to cut Count Royce and that fucking knight to pieces in front of his soldiers but melting them from the inside out them was just as good.
“What are you doing?” Hestia asked, as Slade set several of the vials on top of the door while attaching wires to others and setting them in different locations. By the time he finished he could hear the footsteps in the distance as they came rushing from their alternative route toward the warehouse.
“Teaching them a lesson,” Slade said he glanced up at the various vials and marbles primed to kill anybody who entered the warehouse. “Am I immune to all this shit as well?”
“Nobody is immune to Emerald Decay,” Hestia said as she walked toward a large pile of crates near the back of the warehouse and pulled a hidden lever. One of the crates opened leading to a large tunnel that could easily fit a wagon if they’d had one. “The only way to survive it is to have imbibed Blackwyrm Venom within the last twenty-four hours. The Blackwyrm Venom nullifies the decay.
“Blackwyrm Venom will kill a person in five fucking minutes,” Slade scoffed.
“Which is why you need to have imbibed Eternal Dream several hours before that,” Hestia said nonchalantly as she stepped into the tunnel. “And in order to imbibe Eternal Dream without falling into a coma you need to drink Vileoak and if you don’t want thorns to grow all over you better eat some Blightroot.”
“Blightroot is poisonous too!” Slade snapped. “Everything on that list is poisonous!”
“But you can build up an immunity to Blightroot,” Hestia said as she stepped into the cave. “It’s like I said! Poison is medicine!”
“Crazy fucking elf,” Commander Grey said, glancing back at Slade. “Are you fucking coming?”
“Not yet,” Slade said as he watched the warehouse door. “I just need to be sure…”
“Fucking psychopath,” the grey-haired bastard said as he watched with him as the door opened.
Slade watched as Count Royce came barging through the door with the other royal guards as the vials shattered at their feet. Slade smiled as the guards panicked and screamed as their bodies petrified while deadly poisons burned them from the inside out. A dozen different poison related deaths took the men in a matter of seconds.
But he saw Count Royce and the man that dared to lay his hands on Hestia, their bodies burning and breaking as they screamed in agony. More importantly, they saw him. His smile was the last thing they saw as they melted away.
“Now we can go,” Slade said as they closed the passage and rushed through the tunnel.
The tunnel exited a little over a mile from the city proper in the stable of a small homestead. They found horses and a stable boy that didn’t seem inclined to ask questions as they took the animals.
“I better take the reins,” Hestia said as Slade found himself struggling to climb on the horse. “It looks like the Ragebloom is wearing off.”
“Maybe he should ride with me,” Commander Grey said, mounting a large muscular horse. “I can hold him.”
“He’s my darling,” Hestia said, climbing on the horse behind Slade. The emerald-eyed elf reached around him to take the reins. “It’s my job to take care of him.”
“Suit yourself,” Commander Grey said. “But we have a bit of a ride ahead of us.”
“I’m fine,” Slade grumbled as everything started to go dark.
“I know,” Hestia said sweetly in his ear. “But if you close your eyes and go to sleep, I promise everything will be better than fine when you wake up.”
CHAPTER 20
Frost was relieved as the wagons containing the courtesans arrived before sunrise. Knowing that the escape was happening the previous night, he found himself completely unable to rest or relax. If he wasn’t pacing, he was drinking to take the edge off. He wasn’t the only one worried as Lysandra, Desdemona, and even Fiora waited with him at the edge of the village.
He wanted to meet them halfway but Fiora insisted that he let her men handle everything and that his movements would draw unnecessary attention.
“Princess Fiora,” a holy knight leading the caravan jumped out of his wagon and bowed deeply as the other men lifted up the various monster corpses and skins that were hiding the courtesans. The knight glanced at Frost, freezing as if unsure of what he was seeing. “Have we met somewhere?”
“Sir Herald!” a geomancer waived excitedly. “Here I was thinking we’d never see you again! What are you doing here?”
“That’s it!” the knight said, punching his fist in his palm. “I never expected to see you here! Are you part of the Princess’ personal guards now? I wouldn’t be surprised given how strong you are!”
“Hey, Timothy!” the geomancer shouted. “Sir Herald is here too!”
“Really?” a knight poked his head out from behind a cart. “I suppose the bastard got bored of his wives and w
ealth again and decided for another adventure, huh?”
“Sorry about him,” the holy knight shrugged. “You can’t really blame him though. You are a bit of a bastard. Oh! I apologize for my language princess. Please forgive me.”
“A bit of a bastard is an understatement,” Fiora said, ignoring the apology as she glanced at Frost. “Herald Frost is quite a bit worse than your standard bastard.”
“Herald Frost?” the man chuckled. “Huh?”
“Oh!” Frost snapped his fingers as he finally remembered where he knew the men from. “Simon, Timothy, and Riley, right?”
“Ridley,” the geomancer corrected. “Wait, Herald Frost?”
“Herald Frost!” Madam Gardenia rushed toward him happily, practically tackling him as she wrapped her arms around him. The redhead pecked him several times on the lips before releasing him. “I knew I could count on you.”
“It was actually me,” Fiora said, glaring at the fox-eared woman.
“Oh?” Madam Gardenia said, tilting her head at the blonde princess. “Does that mean you want a hug and some kisses?”
“No,” Fiora scoffed before turning her attention to the men of her unit. “Thank you very much for your service. I’ll take note of it during the next…”
“So, Sir Herald is Herald Frost?” Simon said, still trying to make sense of things.
“Wait,” Timothy said nervously. “Didn’t we say some things about Herald Frost while…”
“We said a lot of things,” Ridley nodded while backing away slowly. “A lot of very bad things.”
“Why are we helping him anyway?” Simon asked Fiora, crossing his arms. “And are we going to be in some sort of trouble?”
“As I was saying,” Fiora’s eyes narrowed. “I’ll take note of your service during the advancement ceremony next month. In the meantime, until Herald Law leaves Blackwater, I recommend that you remain in Pluma Territory.”
“So, we are in trouble then,” Simon groaned.
“Fuck,” Timothy said worriedly. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
“I for one am simply happy to be of service to you Princess Fiora,” Ridley said, bowing like a gentleman. “If you ever need anything, I want to assure you that Sir Ridley of the Blackwater Monster Regulators will always be at your service.”
“Hold on now,” Timothy said, pushing Ridley to the side. “I never said that I wasn’t honored to be of service to Princess Fiora. Whatever she needs, she can count on Sir Timothy.”
“And Sir Simon,” Sir Simon said, shoving his little brother to the side.
“Good to know,” Fiora said, clearly disinterested in the men.
“Oh,” Frost chuckled while shaking his head. “Yeah, I forgot that you were all big fans of hers. You may want to sit down…”
“Sit down?” Sir Ridley asked. “Why?”
“Well,” Frost nodded at Fiora. “The little princess there is currently betrothed to King Darius Asmund of Rilia.”
“Betro…” Ridley’s voice trailed off as his face contorted. Simon and Timothy looked like their hearts were simultaneously stomped on. Several other soldiers standing around wore similar expressions.
“Herald Frost,” Lysandra yawned, exhausted from staying up all night with him. “You didn’t need to be so blunt. These men helped all of these women. You should be nicer.”
“She’s right. You could have been nicer,” Desdemona nodded as her stomach growled. “Oh, sorry. It’s about breakfast time.”
The soldiers all took several steps back while carefully watching Desdemona.
“Oh! Not you!” Desdemona said worriedly. “I eat pigs, not people!”
“You just ate a person last night,” Fiora corrected, causing the soldiers to take another step back. “How did the Prophet Elias compare to a pig?”
“Can we not…” Frost started to say.
“So good,” Desdemona said with a smile, showing off her sharp fangs as her crimson eyes burned with excitement. “His heart and brain tasted soo…”
“Des,” Frost patted her head. “No. Just no.”
“But she asked!” Desdemona pouted.
“She was teasing you,” Frost said.
“So,” Sir Simon chuckled nervously as he stared at Desdemona and Lysandra. “These were the wives you were talking about.”
“Two of them,” Frost said, pointing at the nearby treetop where Lishri’s house resided. The men stared at the web covered stairway leading to the top and quickly did the math. “That’s where Lishri lives. And Brynn’s currently in Blackwater. Hopefully she’s alright.”
“She undoubtedly is,” Fiora said confidently. “Even if Herald Law could prove she was involved in some way, she’s a princess and there’s absolutely no evidence implicating her or any of us for that matter.”
“I wouldn’t say that,” Commander Grey said, approaching on horseback with Hestia and Slade beside him. Just minutes behind the caravan of courtesans. “Somebody’s definitely implicated.”
“That’s Baron Slade,” Simon said, pointing at Slade like an excited fanboy, forgetting completely about Princess Fiora. He began shaking his brother’s shoulder excitedly. “That’s Slade the fucking slicer in person!”
“I can’t believe we’re actually this close to him,” Sir Timothy said.
“And that’s William Grey,” Ridley whispered, pointing at Commander Grey. “The Southern Spider! Do you think he’d sign something for me?”
“What do you mean implicated?” Fiora said irritably. “How implicated?”
“Don’t worry,” Slade said disdainfully while hopping down from the horse, nearly falling over as he landed on the ground. “Fucking cunt, that hurts.”
“My love,” Hestia said worriedly as she jumped down from the horse and wrapped her arm around his waist, supporting him. “You need to rest.”
“I’ll rest in a bit,” Slade argued as several guards pointed and murmured. “Want to speak up so I can hear you? I just got done killing a couple dozen royal fucking guards and feel like fucking death but I fucking promise I have enough energy to cut out all of your fucking tongues if you want to say something!”
The gossiping men went silent as Slade and Hestia walked past. Every one of them growing progressively more uncomfortable as Hestia lovingly doted on the silver-haired ninja.
“Explain,” Fiora said coldly.
“The fucking cunt knew something was happening,” Slade said. “He was watching us and probably saw that the fucking patrols shifted too early or fucking something. Maybe he just fucking knew that the devil-fucking cunt right there wouldn’t leave things be. Who fucking knows? But it was a very public fucking massacre.”
“Half the fucking city saw it,” Commander Grey chimed in. “I’m not eager to go back there myself and I technically didn’t even kill anybody.”
“And how does that impact me?” Fiora snapped angrily at Slade. “Do you have any idea…”
“Don’t you yell at him!” Hestia said, her emerald eyes seething rage as she released Slade and threateningly stomped toward Fiora. “My darling is tired and needs rest and he nearly died getting everybody out safely!”
“Hestia,” Slade grabbed her shoulder, attempting to turn her toward him. “It’s fine…”
“No!” Hestia said, pulling away and turning back to Fiora. “It’s not fine!” Hestia aggressively poked Fiora’s chest several times. “You are not allowed to talk to my love like that! He did everything he was supposed to and now we’re going to go to bed! If you don’t like that, too bad! He needs proper sleep!”
“You’re not implicated,” Commander Grey said, trying not to laugh as Hestia dragged Slade off. “The man took everything on himself. He’s an annoying foul-mouthed fuck but when he takes a fucking job, he really goes all out.”
“How the hell did you get out of the city?” Frost asked curiously.
“About that,” Commander Grey chuckled. “That crazy fucking elf had a fucking poison I’ve only heard about. Watched as royal guards melted
in a matter of fucking seconds. Right now, there are a lot of fucking skeletons wearing blue armor lining the street. Herald Magnus is going to be pretty fucking pissed about that.”
“Oh no,” Lysandra said worriedly. “I told her that she’s not allowed to make poisons like that.”
“You knew she could mix something like that?” Commander Grey asked in disbelief.
“Hestia can mix most things,” Lysandra said, staring at Hestia’s small cottage. “But she’s not allowed to mix love potions, mind altering potions, and deadly poisons because we have children in the village.”
“But she wasn’t in the village,” Frost said.
“Well,” Commander Grey pointed at the cottage. “I wouldn’t be surprised if you start seeing some travelers searching her out after that fucking display. There are only a handful of alchemists on the fucking continent that can mix shit like that because every alchemist that fucks with that type of shit ends up killing themselves on accident.”
“Oh,” Lysandra said. “I better go talk to her. She knows she’s not allowed…”
“Let her rest,” Frost said. “I’m sure she knows not to mix it up while in the village.”
“She poked me,” Fiora said, as if it just registered with me. “That pointy-eared bitch poked me. I’m a princess of Zira and she poked me.”
“I’d let it go,” Frost said, shaking his head. “If you make Slade choose between you and Hestia you’re going to lose.”
“She poked me!” Fiora repeated, jabbing Frost in the chest several times. “Like this! Just like this! She poked me!”
“Really?” Frost asked, somewhat confused. “Was that the first time anybody’s ever poked you?”
“Yes!” Fiora shouted angrily.
“Oh,” Frost laughed. “Well, welcome to Pluma Territory. No rules against it here.”
“Herald Frost,” Madam Gardenia leaned on his chest, brushing her tails against his back as she wrapped them around him. “We’ve all had a very long night. I don’t suppose you’d have a place for us all to sleep?”
“We’ve also been up all night,” Lysandra said, grabbing Frost’s arm possessively. “Desdemona can find you a place to sleep.”
