I could tie her hands above her head with my belt—stretch her out to fully appreciate her beautiful body. Could tease her for hours until I finally took her. I want to hear her moaning my name as I fuck her, as I mark her as mine forever…No! He had to get hold of himself! Taking a deep breath, Xairn fought for control.
“Relax,” Lauren murmured, her warm breath tickling his ear. “You’re tight as a wire, baby. Don’t you like snuggling with me?”
“It’s very stimulating, this…snuggling,” Xairn admitted in a strangled voice.
“Well, it’s supposed to be relaxing.” Humming contentedly, she slipped a hand into his shirt to stroke his chest. Her fingertips slid, cool and ticklish, over the raised letters of the brand the Judge of the Market had put on him. Xairn jumped. “I’m sorry.” She looked up at him. “Does this still hurt?”
“No,” he said stiffly. “I am a fast healer.”
“Your eyes…” She bit her lip. “For a minute they went back to their old color.”
“Did they?” He shrugged. His eyes felt hot again in their sockets and he wondered if that had anything to do with it. “Don’t worry,” he told Lauren, who still looked concerned. “It wasn’t because it hurt when you touched me.”
“It was hard for me to watch them do it,” she whispered. “To know you were being hurt for my sake and there was nothing I could do about it.”
Xairn felt some of his tension melting at her soft words. “I didn’t mind,” he assured her softly.
“Well, I did.” Leaning over him, Lauren unfastened his shirt and pulled it open, baring his chest. Her long black hair trailed over his skin, raising chillbumps along his arms and setting his nerves afire with need. “Xairn…” she murmured, looking up at him once more. “I wish I could have done this earlier, to take the pain away.” Gently, she pressed her lips to the brand, kissing the places he was marked with her name.
Xairn felt like he was going to explode. Her mouth was so warm and soft and wet and when she finished kissing the brand, she began to move lower. He clenched his hands into fists at his sides as her lips trailed over his tense abdomen and lower, to the waistband of his black flight pants. When Lauren reached for the fastening of the pants he bolted upright.
“Oh my God, what? Are you okay? Did I hurt you?” She looked up at him anxiously, her amber eyes filled with concern.
“I’m fine. I just need some…some air.” Xairn sat on the edge of the bed, breathing raggedly, his chest pumping like a bellows. His eyes felt like they were going to burn a hole in his skull, they were so hot, and his primary heart was thundering in his ears. In his mind’s eye, a scenario was playing over and over again.
Lauren on her knees, naked. Her hands tied behind her back and a black blindfold covering her eyes. She would be helpless, completely under my control. First I would place the collar on her and then I would pierce her nipples. Two small hoops of silver—the contrast of the bright metal against her dark skin would be beautiful. The piercing would sting but I would kiss the pain away and stroke her body until she was ready for pleasure. Then I would take her over and over, marking her with my cum. Bonding her to me.
The scene was so vivid Xairn couldn’t stop seeing it. Couldn’t stop imagining how it might go. He saw himself pushing down his pants and rubbing his cock against her soft cheek. She would turn her head blindly, unable to see but searching, trying to find his shaft. He would feel her warm, wet mouth closing on him, taking him in, sucking him. But not just his secondary shaft—no. She would suck and stimulate his primary shaft—his bonding shaft.
He would thrust into her mouth, his hands buried in her long, silky black hair and she would moan softly as she sucked him, as he fucked her mouth. And then when both his primary and secondary shafts were hard, he would take her. Fill her completely both front and back and bond her to him until she cried his name out loud and gave herself completely, until she was his forever…
No! Xairn tried to get hold of himself. No I can’t let it go that far. Can’t ever bond her to me. Because he knew if he ever let go of his control enough to do that, he would hurt her, would break her fragile body with his rough fucking and fierce sexual demands.
It’s not safe, he told himself angrily. Damn it to the seven hells, none of this is safe. Her mother is right not to trust me—I can’t even trust myself!
But then he risked a glance to his side and saw Lauren’s lovely, worried face. This was what she wanted—to touch and be touched. She wanted his hands on her almost as much as Xairn wanted to put them there. People who love each other show it by being close and touching, she’d said. But how could he do that without losing control?
“Forgive me,” he said roughly. “I’m just…this is difficult for me.”
“Because it’s new?” Lauren touched his arm anxiously and he flinched away before he could stop himself.
Xairn hated to see the hurt look on her face. “Because I want so much more,” he said, looking down at his hands. “Because…because I’m afraid of what I might do to you.”
Lauren sighed. “You’re not going to hurt me, Xairn. Just touch me—I won’t break.”
His hands clenched into fists again. “I…I don’t know how,” he confessed in a low voice. “You know I have never been with a female, Lauren. I don’t know how to…to bring you pleasure without going too far and hurting you.”
“Then I’ll teach you.” She smiled at him. “Will you let me?”
Xairn closed his eyes tightly. Could he bear this? Would he be able to keep control of himself well enough to give her pleasure without snapping and taking her completely?
“I…want to,” he said slowly. “Maybe…maybe if you allow me to do the touching and don’t try to touch me in return.”
“You wanna be in the driver’s seat, huh?” She gave him a playful smile.
“More like I need to be,” Xairn said truthfully. He looked at her. “I…I think I can control my darker urges if I am the one in control. But if I feel your hands and mouth on me again…” He shook his head. “I just don’t know.”
“All right then.” Lauren nodded thoughtfully. “We can do that.” Gracefully, she got off the bed and knelt on the floor in front of him. “I am yours to command, Master.” Her amber eyes danced playfully. “What would you have me do?”
“Stop it,” Xairn said hoarsely. Seeing her submissive posture brought his Scourge desires to the surface as nothing else could. His shaft throbbed painfully in his pants and he closed his eyes briefly, fighting for control. “I know you’re joking but please…please don’t.”
“I’m sorry.” Lauren rose and came to stand between his legs. She was close enough that Xairn could feel the heat of her body but she was obviously being careful not to make contact. “I…I don’t know why I did that,” she confessed, sounding confused. “So…what do you want to do?”
“I want to touch you,” he said honestly. “Touch you but not hurt you. But first I want…I want to see you.”
Her eyes widened slightly. “You mean…naked?”
“Yes. If you don’t mind.” The times he’d glimpsed her naked body were still burned into his brain. Especially when she’d offered herself to him if he would save her from his father. Now she was offering herself for a different reason—because she loved him. Xairn wanted desperately to return that love without hurting her but he wasn’t sure he could.
“Well, I’m a little shy…” Lauren bit her lip. “I know you’ve seen me before, but…”
Xairn shook his head. “It’s all right if you would rather not.”
“No, I want to. I do.” Lifting her chin, she pulled the t-shirt over her head, baring the lacy undergarment that cupped her breasts. It was white and the contrast of the pale fabric against the creamy light brown of her skin was breathtaking.
“Beautiful,” Xairn breathed, reaching up to stroke the outline of one nipple, visible through the white fabric.
Lauren sucked in a breath and smiled. “How about if I lose the bra?
” Before he could answer, she was unfastening the back of the garment and slipping it off her arms. It fluttered to the floor and lay there in a small heap of white lace, baring her breasts to him completely.
Xairn felt his eyes go blazing hot for a moment as he took in the lovely sight. Her breasts were high and full, just the right size to fill his palms. And her nipples were tight—ripe berries at the tips of her breasts. Hesitantly, he reached for her and Lauren thrust forward, pressing her warm mounds into the palms of his hands. She moaned softly, a sound that seemed to go straight to the hard ridge of his cock and make him even harder.
“Lauren…” he murmured, looking into her eyes. “I want…I need to put my mouth on you.”
“You want to kiss me?”
Xairn wanted to do more than that. He longed to strip her completely naked and lick and suck and bite every inch of her skin until she was wholly and utterly his. But he had to be careful—couldn’t risk losing control. “Yes,” he said at last. “But I need you to be still while I do it.” If he felt her moving against him, thrusting her breasts closer to his face, offering herself, he knew he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from taking her, hurting her. “Here.” Taking her arms, he folded them securely behind her back. “Keep them like that,” he warned, looking into her lovely amber eyes. “Don’t move and don’t reach for me. Hold perfectly still while I touch you. While I kiss you.”
“All…all right.” Lauren looked puzzled but she did as he asked, holding perfectly still as he leaned forward to press his face to her chest.
The skin between her breasts was softer than anywhere else on her body. Xairn rubbed his cheek against her there, breathing in her scent, trying to keep control of himself. It helped that she was holding perfectly still, not provoking him in any way. If she tried to reach for him or worse, tried to run away, he was certain his predatory Scourge instincts would be so aroused that something disastrous might occur.
Tentatively, he put out his tongue and lapped the inner curve of her right breast. Lauren moaned softly but didn’t move and he felt his shaft harden even more at the delicious, slightly salty taste of her skin. Gods, he wanted to taste her more—to taste her lower! But he knew he couldn’t control himself if he did that. Instead, he pressed his lips to the tight bud of her right nipple. Lauren moaned again.
Xairn looked up. “I’m not hurting you, am I?”
“No, baby.” Her pupils were dilated and her voice was slightly husky. “You’re just driving me crazy, going so slow.”
“I have to go slow,” he said truthfully. “I need to be sure I don’t lose control.”
“You won’t,” she said softly. “Just do what you want to do.”
Xairn felt his eyes get hot. “I want to suck you,” he admitted, cupping one breast in his hand and rubbing his thumb gently over the tight nipple. “I want to take you into my mouth completely and hear you moan while I taste you.”
Lauren’s breath seemed to catch in her throat. “Do it then,” she whispered. “I told you, do what you want.”
If only you knew everything I really want, you’d run from me. But he didn’t say it out loud. Instead, he parted his lips and took the tight bud into his mouth, sucking softly at first and then harder, listening to her soft cries of pleasure as he fought to hold himself back.
Lauren couldn’t stop watching the erotic sight of her tight nipple disappearing between Xairn’s lips.
He sucked her softly at first, as though he was afraid to hurt her. Then he seemed to gain confidence. He opened his mouth, taking as much of her breast between his lips as he could, and sucked fiercely, as though he couldn’t get enough of her.
Lauren longed to run her fingers through his thick black hair, to stroke the broad, muscular shoulders knotted with tension as he pleasured her. She started to reach for him but Xairn must have felt her movement. His arm slid around her waist and one big hand suddenly locked around both her wrists, keeping them in place behind her back. Lauren moaned and wiggled a little in protest and he released her nipple and looked up at her.
“Hold still.” His voice was hoarse. “Please, Lauren. Just don’t…don’t move.”
“All right,” she whispered, nodding. She had no idea why he had to be in such complete control but it was his first time doing anything like this, so she supposed she could cut him some slack.
Still, it was incredibly hard to just stand there and watch as he sucked her other nipple as deeply and fiercely as the first. She wanted to move against him, wanted to press closer and feel his big body, hard against her own. She could feel her pussy getting wet and hot under her tight jeans. Getting ready for him. The long weeks of sexual tension between them were finally coming to a head and she wanted him so badly.
“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured hoarsely, looking up at last. “I want to see more of you. All of you.”
“We…we can do that,” Lauren said breathlessly. “You’ll have to let me go if you want me to take my jeans off, though.”
His eyes glowed red-on-black briefly. “I’ll undress you.”
Without waiting for an answer, he unfastened her jeans and pulled down the zipper with a low, purring sound. Lauren bit her lip as her pink cotton bikini panties came into view. She’d been so glad to get back into her regular clothes as soon as they came back to Earth. Now she was just as eager to get them off.
Xairn pushed the jeans down until she could step out of them. Then, when she was naked except for her panties, he pressed his cheek against the small pink triangle covering her pussy and inhaled deeply. When he looked up at her, his eyes were red-on-black again. “Your scent… You smell so good.” His voice was hoarse with emotion—with need. One large hand slid up her thigh to cup her mound carefully. “I want to see you here. Want to spread open your pussy and explore you.”
Lauren’s breath caught in her throat. “Do it, then,” she whispered. “Go on, Xairn. I…I want you to.”
Slowly, he pushed the little pink panties down, baring her completely. Lauren was glad she’d taken a shower as soon as they got home. She’d taken the opportunity to do a little personal grooming and now the soft patch of black curls that covered the mound of her pussy was neatly trimmed.
“Spread your legs,” Xairn said and it wasn’t a request.
Feeling suddenly shy, Lauren did as he asked. Was she the first woman Xairn had ever seen this way? Was she going to be the standard by which he judged all other women in the future?
“There won’t be any other women,” he murmured hoarsely. “Just you. Only you, now and forever, Lauren.”
Did I say that out loud? Lust was clouding her brain, making it hard to think. She must have said it instead of thinking it though, because there was no way Xairn could read minds. That would make him way too much like the AllFather for comfort.
“So beautiful,” he whispered, running both hands up her thighs until Lauren shivered. His hands came to a stop on her pelvis, his thumbs framing her pussy. “I want to touch you here,” he said, looking up at her. “But I don’t know how.”
“Just be gentle. You’ll do fine…more than fine,” Lauren tried to tell him but he shook his head.
“I want you to show me. Lie on the bed and spread your legs. Show me how you like to be touched.”
Lauren felt her cheeks getting hot. “You’re serious? You want me to…to touch myself in front of you?” It was something she regarded as private—off limits. Something she’d never done with a lover before. But Xairn didn’t seem willing to take no for an answer.
“Show me,” he insisted. His big hands slid up her thighs to her arms and he took her by the shoulders and looked at her intently. “Show me how to touch you, Lauren. Show me how to make you come.”
His eyes flickered red-on-black again and the raw need in his voice made her shiver. “All…all right,” she whispered. “But I’ve never done this before when anyone was watching.” Feeling awkward, she climbed on the bed beside him and then lay back, resting against the pillows.
“Spread your legs,” Xairn commanded. “I want to see you—all of you.” Something about the demanding tone of his voice made her feel wet and hot and swollen between her thighs.
Heart pounding, Lauren parted her thighs obediently, letting him see.
“Good.” His voice was a soft growl. “Now spread your pussy open for me. Let me see how wet you are.”
Hands trembling, Lauren did as he demanded. Sliding her fingers down, she opened herself for him, spreading her outer pussy lips to reveal her swollen inner folds.
“Gods.” Xairn’s voice was hoarse with need. “You’re drenched, Lauren.”
“Can’t help it.” Lauren was blushing so hard she felt like her cheeks were going to catch fire. “The way you sucked me…sucked my nipples… It made me want you.”
“I want you too, but not yet. Slowly,” he cautioned. “Show me first. Show me what feels good.”
“This…” Feeling hot and cold all over, Lauren slid two fingers into her pussy. Slowly, she stroked the sensitive side of her clit, caressing the little bundle of nerves gently as Xairn watched her give herself pleasure.
He watched intently for a long time as Lauren continued to touch herself. She tried not to moan but she couldn’t quite help it. It wasn’t just the pleasure she was giving herself that turned her on, it was the forbidden act of touching herself while he watched. And even more than that, she liked the look on his face, the open desire as he watched her fingertips slide over and around her sensitive button again and again.
But just as she was getting close, the pleasure tightening in her belly like a wire, he suddenly grabbed her wrist. “Stop.”
“What?” Lauren looked at him uncertainly. “Is there a problem?”
“No problem.” His eyes flashed again and he lifted her hand to his mouth. “Gods, your scent is sweet. Let’s see if you taste as good as you smell.”
Lauren bit back a moan as he slipped her fingers into his mouth and began to suck and lick, cleaning away her juices carefully with his tongue. When he was finished, he looked at her. “I want to try it—try touching you. But I don’t want to kneel over you. I want you against me. Like this.”
Brides of the Kindred Volume One: Books 1-4 Page 146
