journey. I wasfive-and-twenty; I had completed my studies, travelled for a couple ofyears, and was about settling down to my own home and itsresponsibilities--for my father was dead, and I was an eldest son--whenthe curtain rises for the third and last time in this simplest ofdramas. I was unmarried, yet no misogamist, nor was there theshadowiest of reasons why I should not marry; rather, considerably even,the other way. My family wished it; I wished it myself in the abstract.I had money enough and to spare. I loved my home, and was ready tolove it still more; but I had never cared for any woman as I knew I mustcare for _the_ woman I could make happy, and be happy with, as my wife.It was strange--strange and disappointing. I had never fallen in love,though I may really say I had _wished_ to do so. Never, that is to saysince I was fifteen, and the gleaming locks of my Bronzie--likeAslauga's golden tresses--had irradiated for me the corner of the gloomyold London church where she sat.
That was ten years ago now, yet I had not forgotten my one bit ofromance.
It was Christmas again. For the day itself I was due at home, ofcourse; but on the way thither I had promised to spend a night withGreatrex, a friend of some few years' standing, whom I had not seensince his marriage, at which something or other had prevented my beingpresent. He had invited me before, but I had not felt specially keenabout it. He was rapturously in love with his wife I could see by hisletters, and that sort of thing, under the circumstances, made me feelrather "out in the cold"--not unnaturally. But at last I had given in:I was to stay a night, possibly two, at Moresham, Greatrex's home,where, as he had written, on receiving my acceptance, "You will see herat last," for all the world as if I had been dying to behold MrsGreatrex, and counting the hours till my longings for this privilegeshould be gratified.
Greatrex met me at the door. It was afternoon, but clear daylightstill, though December, when I drove up.
"So delighted, so uncommonly pleased, old fellow, at last," heejaculated, shaking me vigorously by the hand; "and so will Bessie be.I don't know much about your taste, but you can't but agree that _I_have shown some, when you see her. One of her great beauties is herhair; I wonder if you'll like the way she--; what's the matter?" as thefootman interrupted him with a "Beg pardon, sir," "Oh yes, I'll tellBarnes myself;" and he turned back to the groom, still at the door."Excuse me one instant, old fellow. Bessie is in the drawing-room."
"Don't announce me. I will introduce myself," I said hastily to theservant. A queer, a very queer feeling had come over me, at thatmention, by her husband, of Mrs Greatrex's _hair_--could it be? Andher name was Bessie. I could not imagine Bronzie by that name--mystately little maiden--what if it _were_ though? and my dream to endthus?
I stepped quietly into the room. She was standing by the window; therewas snow outside. I saw her, all but her face, perfectly: I saw _it_--the hair--and for an instant I felt positively faint. It was _it_--itmust be she; the way she wore it was peculiar, though very graceful; thehead was pretty, but the small figure, though neat and wellproportioned, was by no means what I had pictured Bronzie as a woman.But what did it matter? She was Greatrex's wife.
"I must introduce myself; Mrs Greatrex," I began, and then, as my wordscaught her ears, she turned, and for the first time I saw the face--theface I had so often pictured as a fit accompaniment to that glorioushair.
Oh, the disappointment--the strange disappointment--and yet the stillstranger relief! For she was Greatrex's wife! But she wasn't Bronzie--my Bronzie had never been. There _was_ no Bronzie!
Yet it was a sweet and a pretty little face, and a good little face too.Now that I know it well I do not hesitate to call it a very dear andcharming little face, though the features are _only_ pretty; the eyesnothing particular, except for their pleasant expression; the nosedistinctly insignificant.
I exerted myself to be agreeable. When Greatrex came in, a moment ortwo afterwards, he was evidently quite satisfied as to the terms onwhich we already stood. Then followed afternoon tea. It seemed to goto my head. I felt curiously excited, reckless, and almost bitter, andyet unable mentally to drop the subject as it were. The absurdity ofthe whole filled me with a sort of contempt for myself, and still therewas a fascination about it. I determined to go through with it, topunish myself well for my own fantastic nonsense, to show my own follyup to myself.
"You may be surprised, Mrs Greatrex," I said, suddenly, "to hear that--I feel sure I am not mistaken in saying so--that I have seen youbefore."
She was surprised, but she smiled pleasantly.
"Indeed," she said; while "where? when? Let's hear all about it. Whydidn't you tell us before?" exclaimed Greatrex, in his rather clumsyway.
"Can you carry your memory back, let me see, nine, ten years?" I asked."Do you remember if at that time you spent a winter in London; or wasLondon your home?"
She shook her head. "No, it was not; but I did spend the winter of inLondon."
"Had you--can you possibly recollect if you wore a large, ratherslouching, felt hat, with a long feather--grey, the hat, too, was grey--that fell over the left side? and a coat of grey, too, some kind ofvelvet, I think, trimmed with dark fur?"
Greatrex looked extremely astonished.
"Come, now," he ejaculated.
Mrs Bessie smiled.
"Yes," she said, "I remember the whole get-up perfectly."
Greatrex looked triumphant. I did not, for I did not feel so.
"And," I went on listlessly, almost--I felt so sure of it now--"did younot come to church for several Sundays that winter; and on ChristmasDay, to Saint Edric's, in ---Square?"
For the first time Mrs Greatrex shook her head.
"No," she said. "I never remember being in Saint Edric's in my life."
Greatrex's face fell; he had been quite excited and delighted, poorfellow.
"Come, now," he said again, in a different tone, "are you sure, Bessie?I think you must be mistaken."
"I think so, too," I added, a little more eager myself now. "You mayhave forgotten the name. Saint Edric's is--" and I went on to describethe church.
"You came with a lady who looked like a governess," and I concluded withsome details as to this person's appearance.
"Yes," Mrs Greatrex said, "that sounds like our governess--Mrs Mills;she was with us several years. But it is not only that I was never atSaint Edric's; I was never at church all those weeks in London at all.I had a bad attack of bronchitis. I remember particularly how vexed Iwas not to wear my new things, especially as we--" suddenly a curiouschange of expression came over her face, and just at that instant herhusband interrupted her.
"I have it," he began excitedly, but he got no farther. "_Bessie_," heexclaimed, with almost a shriek, "my dearest child, you've scalded me!"and he looked up ruefully from the contents of a cup of tea deposited onhis knee.
"No, no," his wife exclaimed, "it was only a little water I was pouringinto my cup, and it was not very hot. But come along, I have a cloth inthe conservatory, where I was arranging some flowers. I'll rub it dryin an instant."
She almost dragged him off--with unnecessary vehemence, it seemed to me.I could not make her out. "An odd little woman," I thought. "I hope,for Greatrex's sake, she's not given to nerves or hysterics, or thatsort of thing."
But they were back in two minutes, Greatrex quite smiling and content,though he has owned to me since that his knee _was_ scalded, all thesame.
No more was said on the subject of reminiscences. Indeed, it seemed tome that Bessie rather avoided it, and a new idea struck me--perhapsGreatrex was given to frightful jealousy, though he hid it so well, andhis wife had got him off into the conservatory to smooth him down. Yes,his manner _was_ queer. Poor little woman! I forgave her her hair.
We strolled off to the stables, then to have a smoke, and thus idledaway the time till the dressing-bell rang.
"We're very punctual people," said Greatrex, as he showed me to my room.
So I made haste, and found myself entering the drawing-room some fewminutes before the
hands of my watch had reached the dinner-hour.
"_She_ is punctual," I thought, as I caught sight of a white-robedfigure standing with its back to me, full in the light of a suspendedlamp, whose rays caught the gleam of her radiant hair. "Not--not verywise to be down before him, if he has the uncomfortable peculiarity thatI suspect. By Jove! how much taller she looks in evening dress!Strange that it should make such a difference!"
"So your husband is the laggard, in spite of his boasted punctuality,Mrs Greatrex?" I began.
She turned towards me.
"I am not Mrs Greatrex," she said, while she raised her
That Girl in Black; and, Bronzie Page 13
