EARLY BIRD BOOKS
FRESH EBOOK DEALS, DELIVERED DAILY
BE THE FIRST TO KNOW ABOUT
FREE AND DISCOUNTED EBOOKS
NEW DEALS HATCH EVERY DAY
The Courtesy of Death
Geoffrey Household
I had never thought of the bungalow as lonely. It was separated from The Green Man by only thirty yards of straggling roses and lawn and all the showy annuals which you find in a pub garden. Its other side faced a cart track beyond which was an abandoned yard, grass and nettles growing through the paving, where former stables and a half-roofless coach house formed an L-shaped block.
I was sitting up doing accounts in the kitchen, because the light was better. In the other room the lamp was so placed that you could only see to read or write in bed. It was after twelve, and a man coming down from the hills would not have seen another lit curtain for miles.
I don’t think he knocked. He probably leant on the back-door and its latch at the same time, and both opened. His clothes were torn and he was plastered with dried mud. His hair was hanging over his eyes and matted with filth. Because it was fair and lank it looked all the more dishevelled and pathetic, like the forelock of a dun horse which has pitched on its head in the mud and got to its feet, without dignity or sense of direction but still game.
About his eyes there was nothing at all pathetic. Within the tangle they reflected the light or, perhaps, projected it. As he rose, very wobbly, from the kitchen floor, I had the impression of a desperate string of muscles carrying about a brain which could no longer give a sensible order but wouldn’t stop issuing them. He reminded me of a very busy man with a bad attack of malaria.
I shut the door and eased him into a chair. I then saw that skin as well as clothes had been ripped. He was oozing blood from long, shallow scratches; it was that rather than mud which had matted his hair. He stretched out his arm on the kitchen table and rested his head on it. When he looked up at me from that angle, his eyes were even more disturbing. I thought he muttered:
‘I want a woman.’
A normal enough remark in private among friends. But as an explanation to a complete stranger of one’s arrival it was a danger signal. My immediate reaction was to wonder if he would stay quiet while I went over to the pub to telephone a doctor or the police. Only a journey of thirty yards which was never taken. Later on, I was often to think of that.
When he repeated himself in a higher voice, it was clear that he had actually said:
‘I want my woman.’
The ‘my’ made a difference that any barman would recognise. If a customer mumbled after his second whisky ‘I want a woman’ you would give him a likely address and get rid of him; but if he said ‘I want my woman’ you would expect the matrimonial confidences which cartoonists insist are frequent—though in fact, due to this country’s licensing hours, a barman is seldom long enough alone with one customer.
‘Who has taken her?’ I asked, hoping that he would reveal enough of his trouble for me to begin to decide what I ought to do.
‘Nobody.’
‘How did you get here?’
‘I don’t know exactly.’
‘Are you sure she exists? As a person, I mean.’
That was hurrying it a little; but one cannot be expected to have the patience of a psychiatrist. However, he gave to my remark a second or two of whatever he could manage in the way of connected thought.
‘I think she must,’ he said. ‘If she did not, what would I have done it for?’
‘Done what?’
‘Run here. To you.’
‘But she is where you came from,’ I answered very positively, afraid that he might have convinced himself that she was, for example, in my bedroom.
‘She is? Why do you think so?’
‘You couldn’t know where you did come from unless she was there,’ I said, entering far too boldly and irrevocably into his world of obsession. ‘So I don’t suppose anything has happened to her.’
‘Happened to her? Of course it hasn’t! Not to her!’ he exclaimed in a voice which was suddenly shrill and clear.
The upward jerk of his head disturbed his balance—his physical balance, I mean—and I just caught him as he toppled over on to the floor. That eased for the moment the question of what I ought to do. Some elementary first-aid was urgent.
I brought him round with whisky and warm milk, which was all I had in the bungalow since I took my meals over at The Green Man. Then I helped him to undress, sponged and disinfected the scratches and put him in my bed with all the blankets I could find on top of him—a precaution though he showed no sign of shock, only of exhaustion and some inner excitement. He was thin, but sinewy as a bird’s leg. I remember noticing his very openwork undervest, a complicated cat’s cradle of woven string. It suggested that he had brought it through the advertisement columns of some health magazine.
I hung up his tweed suit to await next morning a clothes brush and a sewing machine, turned out the bedroom light and returned to the kitchen to draw breath. My visitor had dropped off to sleep, and there was no urgent need to make a nuisance of myself to hard-working police and ambulance men unless he became violent. Once off the subject of his woman he showed no sign of aberration, thanking me with odd formality for my assistance and curling up like a child.
Like a child, too, he offered no further explanation of himself, handing over to me his inert body with complete trust that I would do something about it. I suppose that it was primarily this simplicity which made me feel so responsible for him. He was neither short of money nor suspiciously rich. He had a few pounds in a neat wallet. His name, marked on his clothes with such care that he was either a rather prim bachelor or had a fussy wife, was H. B. Fosworthy.
Ought I to send for a doctor? Well, there was nothing more that a doctor could do for him beyond shoving a needle into him for luck. As an ex-mining engineer I know temporary exhaustion when I see it. I would have liked to wake up Mrs Gorm and get some eggs or whatever she had in the larder. I decided to do so if Mr H. B. Fosworthy could not sleep. Otherwise there was no point in disturbing him till he woke up and started to demand breakfast.
I poured myself a night-cap and tried to make some sense of my lunatic or criminal or deserted husband or whatever the hell he was. I was about to unpack a Lilo and turn in on the kitchen floor when there was a confident knock on the back-door. I said to myself that it was obviously the police and opened up.
The man who entered was very English and certainly not a policeman. At least I unhesitatingly assumed he wasn’t, though aware that my knowledge of plainclothes detectives was entirely drawn from TV and the cinema. He had a manner which nicely combined courtesy with the assurance that everyone else was as reasonable as himself.
‘I hope you will excuse me calling so late,’ he said, ‘but I saw your light on.’
That meant of course that he had either come along the cart track or down from the hills. It was a little suspicious. If he had a clear right to look for my visitor, one would have expected him to follow the road and call with his enquiries at the front of The Green Man. So I pretended to misunderstand him.
‘I’m afraid the pub has shut down for the night. And they haven’t any rooms anyway. Just this bungalow at the bottom of the garden.’
‘Oh, I didn’t want a room. The fact is: I am looking for somebody. And when I saw your light I thought that perhaps I might ask.’
‘Man or woman?’
‘A man. It’s rather a sad case. He gets off by himself sometimes, and that leads to embarrassment. We don’t want to put him under any restraint.’
Still playing for time and hoping to avoid direct questioning, I said that I had been led to b
elieve that mental hospitals in these days could nearly always cure.
‘Well, yes,’ he admitted. ‘But when it is just extreme eccentricity, one hesitates. … You haven’t seen him then?’
‘I thought I heard a noise in the stables some time back,’ I said, with the idea of protecting myself in case this were a genuine enquiry.
‘Do you think anyone would mind if I had a look round?’
‘Well, I don’t. And everyone else is asleep.’
‘I’ll do that then,’ he said.
‘Do you want any help?’
‘No, don’t bother! I’ve disturbed you enough already. Very many thanks.’
I saw the beam of a powerful electric torch thoroughly searching the deserted buildings. Curious to see where he went when he had finished, I slipped out of the bungalow’s front door into the pub garden. From behind the hedge I watched him hesitate about calling on me again, then climb a gate and disappear across the fields.
It reinforced my guess that he had come that way. I wondered why he had firmly refused help, why he was looking for his eccentric friend on foot instead of proceeding by car from village to village and police station to police station. If he had arrived openly, called first at the pub and then walked across the garden to the bungalow with Gorm, I should at once and thankfully have handed over Mr H. B. Fosworthy. As it was, I felt that morning would be soon enough for decision. The man in my bed was certainly peculiar, to put it charitably, but I now had a worrying presentiment that he was also very much afraid. I doubt if I had spotted it earlier.
I had no friends or connections locally. Not many anywhere in England, if it came to that. My practical experience as a mining engineer was extensive, but my qualifications were not. So when I made a small killing in Canadian tin—owing to the generosity of a grateful Board in financing my purchase of shares—I decided to give up a profession in which I could never reach the top and to start a new life in my own country while I was still young enough to be enterprising. I intended to buy an inn and a garage, near a main road but not on it, and develop the pair together. Mine was not a high ambition, but I was confident that I could pull it off. I’m a good mechanic myself and can spot in five minutes whether an employee knows his job. As for catering and comfort, I have lived for fifteen years in camps and hotels and can smell what a customer likes and what he doesn’t.
That was what had brought me to The Green Man. My agents told me it was on the market. I was having a look at the bar takings which were not very big, the available space which could easily be converted into eight bedrooms and baths, and the garage—which did not exist but could well be made from the coach house and stables provided one metalled the hundred yards of cart track.
Being a stranger, therefore, I had nowhere to go for advice and no judgment to rely on but my own. I would have been happier if this emergency had hit me in some camp on the edge of the tundra where one hopes for the visitor who never arrives, rather than in a tame but unfamiliar English hamlet. For the moment it seemed best to continue to lie low and say nothing. So I locked all the doors and windows and went to sleep.
There wasn’t a sound out of Fosworthy. About seven I looked in on him. He was wide awake, lying on his back and watching the ceiling so intently that I followed his eyes to see if there were a mosquito or a leak or something.
He thanked me in precise language, but very warmly, and assured me that there was nothing wrong with him except that he was stiff.
‘I’d better tell you at once that someone was looking for you,’ I said. ‘A close relation, I think.’
‘Not a relation. Dear me, no! A former colleague would be approximately correct.’
‘He seemed to be sure you weren’t far away.’
‘Yes. If my impetus had not carried me half-way over the wire, he would have caught me. He even got a hand on my shoe.’
‘What wire?’ I asked, with some vague mental image of concentration camps or Berlin walls.
‘Two fields up there. On the edge of the downs.’
Then I knew what he was talking about, for I had noticed the formidable hedge and heard from Mrs Gorm why it was there.
Opinions for and against field sports ran strong and very deep in that countryside. The farmer who owned the land between The Green Man and the western slopes of the Mendips objected to fox-hunting. His boundary fence reflected his determination to keep a heartless world out rather than to keep his cattle in. It was a high, double hawthorn hedge, well trimmed and ditched, with two quite unnecessary strands of barbed wire down the middle.
I could understand Fosworthy’s condition on arrival. If his ‘impetus’ had carried him into the hedge—presumably head first—he must have been in it for long minutes trapped and writhing while a more cautious arm felt for him. And all this when he was exhausted after a cross-country run!
‘You got through it?’ I asked, amazed that he wasn’t still helplessly stuck.
‘Yes. And then I saw your light and forced myself to run again.’
The pursuer had never attempted the hedge, for his clothes were not torn. I suppose he trotted along it looking for some break. When he found that there was no way out, he retraced his steps to the upper gate or gap through which they had stumbled, followed the boundary round to the road and at last came down the cart track in search of the lit window which he, too, had noticed.
‘Look here!’ I said. ‘Shouldn’t you be having treatment of some sort?’
‘I don’t think so. The scratches are all very shallow, and I never suffer from infections.’
I gave up that line. In any case the innuendoes of the other man were probably lies. Fosworthy did not seem at all unbalanced in broad daylight.
‘You’re on the run? Some trouble with the police?’
‘I’m a vegetarian,’ he said.
‘What has that got to do with it?’
‘Quite a lot. But it doesn’t matter. I just mentioned the fact to show you that I do not take life if I can help it.’
‘I didn’t mean I thought you were a murderer,’ I assured him. ‘I was just wondering about the law—or, well, politics.’
‘Nothing to do with either,’ he replied. ‘They both avoid essentials.’
‘For example?’
‘Metaphysical animism. What is your religion?’
‘Well, I put myself down on a form as Church of England.’
‘We are not considering the purely sectarian,’ he rebuked me. ‘You are a Christian then?’
‘Naturally.’
‘It’s not particularly natural. But it’s a good start. I think I had better be going now.’
Suppressing yaps of pain, he hauled himself out of the bed and sat on the edge of it.
‘Where to?’
‘I have to see her again. Affinity is surely undeniable. Loving her as I do, she must be ready to love me. Then we could go far away.’
‘Hadn’t you better tell me a little more?’
‘Definition is so often destructive,’ he replied. ‘It may help you to know that to myself I call her Undine.’
I couldn’t care less what he called her. But he produced this sentimental nonsense with so serious an air that it was up to me to show interest. So I asked why.
‘She has blue veins.’
‘Don’t we all?’
‘My good sir, I was not referring to the back of your hand! I meant that her skin is so pellucid that she might, to my eyes and if I may put it so, be the nymph of an enchanted lake. That perfection is indeed the reason why I find myself in your care, for I have recently become convinced—’ he looked at me as if I were an intelligent schoolboy about to be enriched by an eager master ‘—entirely convinced that when our bodies are ethereal we may not distinguish the extremes of physical beauty.’
I replied politely that no doubt he was right.
‘What do you believe happens to you when you dissolve?’ he asked.
That was the first time I heard this word which was to become so det
estable.
‘Well, it’s a bit difficult to know, isn’t it?’
‘Then if you suffer from all the absurd anxieties of mankind, I think you had better get out of here,’ he replied with sudden, disturbing return to everyday life. ‘He’ll borrow a dog and be back with it this morning. The dog will track me here, but so long as this bungalow is locked up and I lay a trail, he will assume I hesitated at the door and went off again. The dog cannot tell him that I entered under your charitable roof. That ensures that you will be unmolested. I fear that I have been instrumental in working my friends into a sad state of excitement in which they are quite likely to commit acts of violence that afterwards they would regret.’
I told him patiently that I was a simple, uncomplicated engineer, and that at least he owed it to me to put things clearly.
‘All I’ve got so far,’ I said, ‘is that you are frightened but that it wouldn’t be important if you hadn’t fallen in love with a girl one can see through.’
‘Though crudely objective, that is about it,’ he admitted.
‘But forgive me if I say it seems inadequate.’
‘Love and death? Inadequate?’
‘I’ll see about getting you some breakfast,’ I said, giving up.
‘I don’t want to involve anybody else.’
‘You won’t. I’ll manage without giving your presence away.’
‘And how about this?’ he asked, turning back the sheets. ‘My word, what a mess!’
In my far too hasty Good Samaritan act I had not foreseen the state of sheets and pillow-case. Or rather I had not thought it important. I never suspected that in the morning there would be any reason for secrecy. The linen was nowhere soaked, but of course spotted by far more blood than could be explained by a shaving cut.
He went into a huddle with himself, quite unembarrassed by silent thought, and at last emerged to ask me what I had done with his clothes. When I replied that they were in the cupboard, he hopped inside to have a look.
‘Thank you,’ he said, peering round the open door like a tame crow, eyes bright with his own incomprehensible cleverness. ‘Would you care to give me your hand?’
The Courtesy of Death Page 1
