by A. M. Myers
Fuck.
It scares the shit out of me to think about giving her the ability to crush me again but what else can I do? If the last week has proven anything to me, it’s that I have to get her back. The pulsing ache that has been a constant in my life since she left is fading each time I’m around her again and for the first time in a long time, I can see my future, painted so clearly in my mind. Before now, I was walking around in a fog, only able to plan the next step but blind when I tried to gaze further ahead until she walked back into my life. So, she can fight me as long and as hard as she wants but I won’t stop.
Her front door opens as I pull up in front of her apartment and she looks up, her eyes widening as we stare at each other and I can see the moment she shuts down, locking away her feelings for me in an attempt to protect herself. Why the hell does she feel like she needs to protect herself from me, though? After climbing off my bike, I walk up the sidewalk to her front door as she turns away from me to lock it.
“Pip,” I say as I come to a stop a couple feet from her. She takes a deep breath as she turns around and meets my gaze.
Aw, hell.
She’s pissed.
“What are you doing here?”
I shrug since it should be pretty fucking obvious. “I’m here to see you.”
“Why?” she hisses, trying to push past me but I block her path. “Didn’t get enough last night? I hate to burst your bubble but I’m on my way to work and I think the neighbors would have an issue with you bending me over the bushes.”
Yeah…
Walking out without a word after I fucked her up against the counter was probably not my smartest move.
“I’m sorry about last night, Pip.” I place my hand over my heart. “Honest.”
She glares up at me, her gaze dropping to my hand before meeting my eyes again and I swear I can see a trace of pain shining back at me. “Well, at least we both agree it was a damn mistake.”
“Hold up. I didn’t say that. I’m apologizing for just walking out on you afterward… that was the mistake. Not us, never us.”
“Stop saying us like that’s a thing,” she sighs, trying to push past me again but I pull her into my arms.
Fuck.
She fits against me like she was made for me and it only hardens my resolve to work things out with her. She is the only woman in the world for me and I can’t believe it took me this long to figure it out.
“It is a thing. It’s always been a thing and you know it.”
Shaking her head, she looks up at me and defeat slips into her gaze. “What is it that you want, Wyatt? I don’t have the energy to play this game with you anymore.”
For the first time I notice the dark circles under her eyes and I can’t help but wonder if she was up all night thinking about us just like I was or if the nightmares of her past still haunt her. Reaching up, I brush my thumb along her cheek and she leans into my touch for just a second before jerking back.
“What’s keeping you up at night, baby?”
She sucks in a breath. “Don’t call me that.”
“Why not?”
“You know why, Wyatt,” she breathes, her voice full of pain as she looks away from me. “I haven’t been your baby in a long damn time.”
I nod, tucking a stray lock of red hair behind her ear. “Yeah, about that…”
Her gaze snaps to mine.
“I’ve been thinking lately that maybe we should revisit things, you know… re-evaluate.”
She jerks out of my arms and stares up at me like I’m insane. “What does that even mean?”
“It means I want my wife back.”
“But,” she whispers, her eyes wide and her mouth agape. “I cheated on you…”
I shake my head. “No, you didn’t.”
“Yes, I did.”
“Pip,” I scold as I reach out and pull her back into my arms. She struggles for just a second before her body practically melts into mine and she meets my gaze. “You know you’re lying. I know you’re lying. So let’s just stop and you tell me the real reason you left me back then.”
She shakes her head. “No.”
“I’m getting real damn tired of that word,” I growl, remembering how much it annoyed me last night as she refused to give me what I wanted. Scoffing, she slips out of my hands again and tries to push past me. With a sigh, I stop her and she glares up at me.
“Let me go. I have to get to work.”
“As soon as you tell me why you left.”
She rolls her eyes in mock annoyance but I can see the fear underneath the attitude. “What does it matter now?”
“Fine,” I snap, her words grating on my nerves. What does it matter? It’s fucking everything and I don’t know why she can’t see that. “I’ll make you a deal. You look me in the eye and tell me you don’t love me anymore and I’ll never bother you again.”
Her gaze slams into mine and she doesn’t need to say anything. The nineteen-year-old girl I left behind when I deployed is staring back at me, love shining in her eyes as she shakes her head again.
“Just stop, Wyatt. The rocks you’re poking under are not pretty.”
I scoff as I pull her back into my arms. She can run as many times as she likes because I’m never going to make the same mistake I did ten years ago. This time and all the times in the future when she runs, I’ll be right behind her.
“I didn’t sign up for pretty, Pip. I signed up for forever, for better or worse. So, one way or another, you are going to tell me what happened back then and when you do, we are going to figure out how we can move forward from here.”
“It’s not that easy, Wyatt,” she whispers and I get the feeling that she is talking about more than just us. Whatever split us up ten years ago, whatever drove her away from me, is big and our biggest hurdle is going to be getting Piper to open up to me again.
“No one said it was going to be easy but I’ll be damned if I let you walk away from me again.”
Chapter Fourteen
Piper
“You almost here?” Lillian asks as I pull into the parking space outside of the restaurant and I sigh, putting the car in park as I lean my head back against the headrest. It’s been one hell of a day and somehow I let Lillian talk me into going out to dinner when I should have just stayed home with a big glass of wine and my comfiest clothes.
“I just parked.”
“Oh, the waitress is here. Do you want me to order you a drink?”
I nod as I turn the car off and grab my purse out of the passenger seat. “Yeah, a berry sangria and make it a large if you can.”
“It’s been one of those days, huh?” she asks before relaying my order to the waitress and I nod to myself as I step out of the car.
“Yes, it has.”
“Well, get your butt in here so you can tell me all about it. I gave them your name at the hostess stand.”
We hang up and I’m just about to slip my phone into my bag when it starts ringing again. I let out a groan. Between dodging Eden and Wyatt’s calls today, I’m about ready to just shut this damn thing off and be done with everyone. Glancing down, I roll my eyes at Wyatt’s name on the screen before declining the call and slipping the phone into my bag.
I honestly don’t know how to take my conversation with him this morning. For so long, all I knew was that I ruined us and anything we could have had so to have him show up and declare that he wants me back just as soon as I tell him what made me leave has me… off balance. Not to mention, that anytime he pulls me into his arms, I want to beg him to never let me go again but I have to force myself to close off around him and push him away. Although, now that he knows I didn’t cheat on him, I don’t see that happening. Telling him the truth, though… I just don’t know if I can. I’ve run it through in my head a hundred times and each time, all I can see is the look on his face - the one that says I’m weak, the one that will be full of disgust once he knows everything.
Shaking my head, I step into the restau
rant and a young brunette looks up from the hostess stand with a smile. “Hi. Just one?”
Party of one?
That’s me.
I resist the urge to scoff… or burst into tears.
“No. I’m meeting someone. My name is Piper.”
“Oh, yes,” she replies with a nod. “Follow me, please.”
She turns and I follow her as she walks away from the entrance and into the dining room. The smell of tomato sauce and garlic bread hits my nose and my stomach growls. I press my hand to my stomach as my mouth waters. Oh, God, I’ve been so consumed with what Wyatt said before he left this morning that I forgot to eat anything. At least I didn’t have any in-studio shoots scheduled for the day so I didn’t have to be around Eden and keep up the silent treatment.
“They’re in the back corner,” the hostess says, pointing toward one of the tables and I scowl. They? I follow her outstretched hand and stumble when my gaze lands on Eden, sitting across from Lillian and looking guilty as hell. I grit my teeth as I close the distance between us and cross my arms over my chest.
“What the hell, Lil?”
She holds her hands up in surrender. “Listen, you guys need to talk and I knew you would never hear her out unless I forced you to.”
“I would have… eventually.”
“Well,” she replies with a shrug. “Eventually is now. Have a seat.”
With a huff, I sit next to Lillian and take a sip of the large sangria in front of my plate before leaning back in my chair, arching a brow and pinning Eden with a look. “Well?”
“Pippy, I’m so so sorry, okay? You know I love you like a freaking sister and I just hated seeing you in pain all the time so I thought if I put you guys together, things would… you know?”
I nod my head. “Oh, yeah… I know and guess what, your little plan worked. Wyatt knows I didn’t cheat on him and he wants me back just as soon as I tell him all the ugly, nasty details about what happened ten years ago so thanks for that.”
“Wait, what? It worked? You guys are getting back together?” she asks, barely resisting the urge to clap her hands in glee and I level a glare across the table.
“No! Yes… I don’t know. Did you miss the part where I have to bare my soul to him?”
She shrugs. “So do it, Piper. All I’ve heard for the last six years is how much you love this man. Why would you let him go again?”
“You know what,” I snap. “Not the point right now. I’m still really mad at you and it doesn’t matter that it worked because you went too far. I’ve trusted you with some very deep secrets and you almost lost that trust.”
“Only almost?”
I keep my glare on her for another second before sighing. “Yes, almost… just don’t do it ever again and I suppose I can accept your apology.”
“Done,” she answers with a nod. “Now, can we go back to why you won’t just tell him?”
Lillian raises her hand. “Back up. We’re going to start with what happened after the texts Eden sent because I feel like I’m missing a whole chunk of information here.”
Sighing, I launch into the whole story, telling them about Wyatt coming over to my apartment and demanding answers before we both got caught up in our feelings and we ended up sleeping together. Eden slams her hand on the table, her eyes shining with interest as she stares at me.
“You slept together?” A slow grin spreads across her face. “This is even better than I imagined. How was it?”
I scoff. “Not the point, Edie.”
“Oh, I disagree,” Lillian adds, smiling. “I think it’s exactly the point.”
They both look at me expectantly and I roll my eyes as I take a big sip of my drink before leaning back in my chair. My thoughts drift back to last night and the way Wyatt pressed me up against the counter and demanded every ounce of pleasure from my body. I drop my gaze to the table, my cheeks heating as I shrug.
“I mean… it was all right.”
“All right, my ass,” Eden says with a laugh, smacking her hand on the table again. “That look on your face tells me everything I need to know.”
“Oh, yeah,” Lillian agrees and I glance up at them as she starts fanning her face.
“Stop it,” I growl, the back of my neck feeling like it is on fire. The waitress stops by our table, saving me from further embarrassment and I chug half my drink as Eden and Lillian order their dinner. When she gets to me, I order the lasagna and another sangria before finishing off my first. She takes the glass from me and as soon as she is gone, Eden whips her head in my direction again.
“Okay, so you guys had super hot sex in… wait, where did it happen?”
I cover my face with my hand. “In the kitchen.”
“Oooh, kitchen sex, even better. What happened afterward?”
“We just stared at each other and then he stormed out of my house without a word,” I answer, meeting her gaze with a glare. It may be a good story for her but it hurt like hell for me and I’m not nearly as giddy about it as she is. Her lips part.
“Oh…”
“Yeah. It was a ton of fun.”
She sighs. “Please tell me he called you today, at least.”
“Nope,” I answer, shaking my head. “He showed up as I was leaving for my first session today and demanded that I tell him the truth since he knows I didn’t cheat on him.”
“And what did you say?” Lillian asks and I shrug.
“I don’t know. I was mostly trying to not give into him but I think I said something about the past not being pretty and he should stop poking around.”
Eden nods, leaning forward like she can’t get enough. “Then he said?”
Sighing, I replay the rest of the conversation for her, word for word, and by the end, she is practically bouncing in her seat and clapping her hands.
“Oh, this is excellent.”
I roll my eyes. “Can you please stop acting like a cartoon villain as you plan out my love life?”
“No, I can’t. Honestly, I was hoping you guys would talk and maybe, just maybe, you would work things out but this is even better than I imagined.”
“Hold on,” Lillian says, ever the voice of reason. “Let’s go back to why you can’t just tell him what happened when you left him.”
I sigh, shaking my head as I fiddle with my silverware. “Because it’s dark and ugly…”
“Yeah, but… he’s your husband, Pippy. This isn’t just some man you met and or some guy you’ve been dating.”
“Don’t you see, Edie. That just makes it worse. This would be so much easier if I was trying to tell some guy that I just met or some guy I was dating but it’s not. It’s Wyatt and I don’t know how to tell him…”
She reaches across the table and grabs my hand. “Well, maybe a little more tactfully than you told me.”
“Eden,” I cry out, my eyes widening as she starts giggling and releases my hand. Shaking my head, I remember my drunken rambling as I tried to explain it all to her and start laughing right along with her. “God, you’re no help sometimes.”
“But other times, I’m loads of help. I mean, look at you and Wyatt now.”
I shake my head again. “Don’t say that like things are magically fixed. Even if I told him everything and we tried to work through things, it wouldn’t be easy or simple.”
“True,” Lillian says, studying me. “But from what you’ve told us, he’s willing to do whatever it takes to fix your relationship.”
“Pipes, you could have everything you’ve ever wanted from your life,” Eden says, reaching across the table again and grabbing my hand with an encouraging look on her face. “All you have to do is be a little brave and tell Wyatt the truth.”
“I’m scared.”
Lillian nods, wrapping her arm around my shoulder. “I know but everything will be okay.”
“And if it’s not,” Eden adds, giving my hand a squeeze. “We’ll go kick that idiot’s ass for hurting our girl.”
“I’ll think about it,�
� I tell them and they both nod in approval. Lillian releases me and I lean back in my chair, fingering the scar along my neck as I think about what I need to tell Wyatt. I’m terrified of his reaction but I’m also terrified of living the rest of my life without him which leaves me in a pretty shitty spot. I’ve never been all that good at pushing myself out of my comfort zones which is why Dr. Brewer says I gravitate toward people like Eden and Wyatt who will force me to do the things that I don’t want to do but it still doesn’t make it easy for me.
“Piper?”
My head jerks up and I blink as James, my ex, stops next to our table and smiles down at me. “Uh… hi.”
“How are you?” he asks and I scowl as my mind struggles to catch up. Nodding, I sit forward and try to paste a pleasant smile on my face but it’s a struggle. James and I broke up because we didn’t want the same things and if I’m being honest with myself, I was never really that into him. I was just into the idea of him, of finding someone and finally starting a family like I’ve always wanted.
“Uh, good. How are you?”
“Really good,” he answers with a nod before his gaze flicks down to my chest. He lingers there for a moment and I resist the urge to cover myself as he meets my eyes again. Seriously? How did I not notice how sleazy he was when we were dating? “You look amazing.”
“Thanks,” I mutter, shooting a confused glance in Eden’s direction. She rolls her eyes and shrugs. I peek over at Lillian who just shakes her head, looking almost embarrassed for James. Someone calls his name from a couple tables over and he glances back at them before turning back to me with a grin.
“Listen, I’ve got to go right now but maybe we can grab lunch sometime. I’ll call you.”
I force a smile to my face but he doesn’t even wait for my nod before he turns and heads over to the leggy blonde waiting for him. Arching a brow, I watch him sit down before turning back to the girls and shaking my head.
