by Kahlen Aymes
"I love you, Cade. I love you, okay?" I started to sob a little bit, I couldn't help myself and he rolled with me onto his side so he could look in my face.
His hands were gentle as he pushed my hair off my face and kissed my mouth.
His thumbs wiped at my tears. "Okay." His mouth raised slightly in a soft smile as he looked at me. "Okay, Brook." He placed a soft, slow kiss on my trembling mouth.
The piano intro of Breathe Me came on the iPod dock as we lay there and it caused more tears to fall from my eyes. "This song... " I couldn't continue right away.
Cade just lay there gazing at my face, wiping my tears and softly brushing my body with his fingers, constantly stroking my skin.
"This song, says everything I needed to tell you. I only ended up hurting myself more by leaving you and it was my fault because I didn't try to talk to you. I needed you to save me... I was dying without you." He reached out to me as the chorus played and folded me in his arms as I cried. "I was so lost without you. It was so hard."
"Me too, love. I holed up with your diary for weeks. I wouldn't have survived without that lifeline to you. Seeing concrete proof that you loved me is what saved me. I was dying too." His blue eyes were liquid as he looked at me.
"I'm sorry," I said softly. I wasn't sobbing, but the tears wouldn't stop raining from my eyes.
"Shhhh, Brook. Hush. It's over. We're together now and I'll never leave you. It's going to be okay, my love." He kissed the tears from my face, his voice barely a whisper.
"I'm sorry I cry so much, I just... " I brought my eyes up to his and couldn't look away. I reached to brush my hand against his strong jaw. I needed to touch that beautiful face, so soft with love in his eyes.
He shook his head. "Brook, it's okay. I love you, so much. It's okay."
"That's why I cry." More tears silently fell on the pillow.
"What? You cry because I love you?" His fingers ghosted over the trail of tears on my face as we lay on the pillows together.
"No, it's because I love you. It's like my whole heart and every cell of my body... is so full of you, that there isn't any place for all that love to go, and there's more and more of it all the time. More than I can even deal with, so it just... spills over.” My voice cracked on a sob. “It spills over... "
He gathered me close and buried his face in the curve of my neck. "I fucking love you more than I ever thought it possible to love anybody, Brook. I'm going to tell you a million times in the next eight hours, and a million times throughout my life. I love you. I love you so much."
"I know. That's the beautiful part. But, this much love; it hurts, doesn't it? I wouldn't trade it, I want it, but it hurts, and it will hurt more. That is the price for such unspeakable ecstasy, isn't it? This unspeakable agony? But, it's so worth it to me."
"I'll never let anything hurt you, my love."
"You can't stop it, Cade. One day one of us will lose the other."
He looked at me as his brow crinkled slightly and he brought his hand back to my cheek.
"Do you mean when we get old and die, because that is the only bloody way that will happen, Brook."
I nodded. "Yes." I smiled through my tears. "Even in seventy years, I don't want to lose you."
"Oh, honey. You're so precious." He took my left hand and ran his finger over the ring on my third finger. "Thank you for this," he kissed the ring and then the top of my hand. "And thank you for tonight in the restaurant. You were brilliant, my love. It made me want you so bloody much. I wanted to take you right there in front of everyone."
I smiled at his crooked grin. "I know. That was so fun. I never knew I could be such a bitch."
He shook his head at me. "You weren't a bitch. You were just making sure she knew to keep her mitts off what was yours. It was bloody brilliant."
His hands were roaming all over my body, down my thigh and up again. As his hand moved upward the hem of the gown came with it and he brought it further up, his hand moving up over my ribs to my breast.
"Mmmmmm...," he whispered as his fingers found the nipple and I felt it harden in his hand. He propped up on one elbow so he could look down on me and let his other hand continue its exploration of my body. His hand moved up to the side of my neck and his thumb brushed my jaw as he bent to take my mouth with his.
My hand moved down his chest until it closed around his manhood and he groaned in my mouth. He was hard again and I wanted to give him pleasure. I was on my back and I turned toward him, my free hand running up his chest and into the back of his hair as I pulled him closer during the kiss.
"Sweetheart, that feels so good," he breathed out the words, and I felt his delicious breath fan over my face. His hands moved down my body, until he was parting the flesh between my legs, seeking, searching...
"Uhhhh...,” I sighed. “Cade." I was just as breathless as he was, both of us touching the other. My hands were moving up and down on him and when I got to the head my fingers tightened and pulled slightly, and I could feel the drops of pre-cum start. I knew he was excited and I loved that I could bring him to this, at the same time that he gave me so much pleasure.
His fingers continued to tease, and finally, he slid two of them inside me.
"Uhhh... God... Brook. You're so wet for me, but so tight. I have to be inside you." He groaned against my mouth as his tongue slipped between my lips. I slipped my tongue toward his, my mouth opening and pulling on his. This kiss got deeper and wilder as he moved over me, and began his slow, tortuous play with my body.
The slippery sensations it caused were so incredible. Again and again he teased, until we were both moaning.
"God, Cade... please," I begged as I dragged my mouth across his chin and down his neck, sucking on the skin. "Please."
He slid deep inside me in one full thrust, and I wrapped my legs tightly around his waist.
"My God.” He had me gasping.
"Hold on to me, Brook." I did as he asked and wrapped my arms around his shoulders as he lifted me with the arm that was tight around my waist. Our bodies never separated as he moved back to his knees and both of his arms slid beneath my hips and ass to move me up and down on his body.
My head fell back at the amazing sensation and Cade began to run kisses down my neck and across my shoulders. Our breathing sped up and I raised my head to look into his blue eyes. His lips were parted, his hair wild from my hands raking through it, and his cheeks were flushed with desire.
"It feels so fantastic. I love the way you fill me up. I can't get close enough to you."
My hands fisted in his hair because I wanted more and more of his kisses. I licked at his lips with my tongue and pulled the top one in to lightly suck on it.
"I know. It will never be close enough, Brook. You were made for me; your body fits mine like a glove. I want to be inside you for the rest of my bloody life," he said just before his mouth smashed into mine, to hungrily devour my mouth.
Again, my heart rushed. We moved in perfect unison, the muscles in his arms taking my weight effortlessly and my arms and legs wrapped around this man I loved so much.
His arms wrapped around my hips to anchor me as he moved within me and he rested his forehead on my collar bone, I felt his hot breath coming in hectic bursts on my skin as his muscles tightened underneath my hands and both of us started to tremble. Again and again he thrust into me, by body tightening around him; I felt my orgasm building within me as I clung to him.
"Brook," he hissed out my name. "I can't hold off anymore. I need to come. Ahhhh! Oh, babe."
"I want you to—I want you to... " I couldn't breathe as my body started to spasm around his. I was amazed our lovemaking was always so satisfying. It had never been like that with David and I was sure it was because the emotions with Cade were so intense.
Cade’s greedy mouth came back to mine as he tensed and held on to me even tighter. His body flexed and stilled against mine, but his mouth continued its sucking and teasing of mine. The kisses growing softer, but still deep, as his arms s
lid up around my back to the back of my head. He held on to my hair and kissed me again and again. He continued to make love to me with his mouth, his tongue tangling deliciously with mine.
I couldn't get enough. "I could kiss you forever," I whispered against his mouth as I drew back and he pulled on my lower lip with both of his. I dropped my head to his shoulder as we both struggled to regain control of our breathing. My arms were wrapped around his shoulders and my hands played with the hair at the back of his neck and his hands moved up and down my back to my hips.
They settled on my ass and he looked into my face and nuzzled my nose with his. "My God! That was incredible."
I felt a soft smile come to my lips as I nodded. His eyes were languid and there was a soft sheen of perspiration on his skin. I could taste the salt on my tongue when I kissed his neck. I turned my face toward him, as I nestled into him and he lowered both of us back to lie down on the bed.
"Are you tired, my love?" His hands played lovingly in my hair.
"Not at all. I have a surprise for you." I smiled happily.
"Strawberry Twinkies?" His mouth broke into a grin. Okay, so he was telling me he was hungry. I rolled my eyes. Typical of Cade to be starving after sex.
I laughed. "No, although, I'll be happy to get them for you, babe."
I moved from him reluctantly and pulled the nightgown down as I went to the basket of snacks that Stephanie had ordered for us. "Should we open the champagne? It sounds good with the strawberries, doesn't it?"
His eyes followed me around the room but he didn't say anything, so I looked at him pointedly. "Cade? Do you want the champagne? Hmmm?" I held up the bottle and pointed to it with raised eyebrows.
"Oh, sure, love. I'll open it. Give it here."
I walked over to him with the ice bucket and the bottle and went back to grab the glasses, strawberries and his God-forsaken Twinkies. "Where did you go there?"
"Nowhere. You're just so beautiful. Sorry if I was staring."
My face flushed in pleasure and I couldn’t help the pleased smile that spread across my face.
Jesus. You are the beautiful one, I thought.
"Okay, so what’s my surprise?" he asked as the champagne cork flew across the room and the bottle overflowed on the floor. "Shit. I should have gotten a towel first."
I sat on the bed in front of him, my legs curling under me. "I'm not on the production schedule tomorrow." I raised my eyes to his as I ripped open the cakes.
His face split in a big grin. "Really?
"Uh huh." He reached for the back of my neck and leaned in to kiss me.
"That's just brilliant. It means I really can make love to you all night." He grinned at me as he poured the champagne into the two flutes. "How'd you manage that?"
"I just told Martin I had a heart ache and needed the day off. After I lost it the other night, he understood.”
Cade's face softened as he remembered that night, a small frown knitting his brow.
I reached out and took the glass from him and set it on the bedside table. "Hey, no frowns. It's working out to our benefit, isn't it?"
"Brook..." I leaned in and kissed his mouth before he could say anything.
"No being sad. The feelings between us just made these movies that much better. There is a ton of pain in this one and now I have something to harness. Think of it like that, okay? I know you love me, Cade. You leave me in no doubt."
He smiled softly. "Okay." He reached out to take my hand in his.
"What have you been up to? Any new projects on the horizon?" I realized how long it had been and how much had gone on that we didn't know about each other.
"Um, I read for a new movie that would schedule between the second and third movies. It's in New York, so at least I won't be half way around the world."
"What kind of movie is the new one? What's it called?" I was genuinely interested.
"Only Us. It's about people who have horrible family lives and the romantic connection between them that basically saves them both."
I involuntarily stiffened. "That sounds deep. It was bound to happen. Everyone wants to see you panting and kissing. I should know." I smiled slightly despite the discomfort I was feeling over it.
"I know what you're thinking, Brook. Just stop." He ran his hand down my arm to take my hand.
"Oh? What am I thinking?" He thinks he knows me so well.
"That my method acting will make me fall in love with this new co-star. It won’t happen."
I didn't say anything but just squeezed his hand.
"Anyway, that isn't what happened with you, Brook. I loved you before we were even born, okay?" He leaned in to place a soft kiss on my mouth as his fingers traced my cheekbone.
"I know. I'll live through it, I guess." I joked. I knew in my heart he loved me and I had to trust it. "Just remember that when it's me smooching some other dude on the big screen, got it?"
He nodded and kissed me again. Mmmm, he tasted so good.
"Will you do something for me while I stuff strawberries up these Twinkies asses?" I giggled at him. He burst out laughing as I began pulling the hulls from the fruit. Good, that's what I hoped to accomplish.
"Anything. What do you want?" He was still laughing as I held out the first strawberry filled Twinkie for him. Cade grabbed it and took a big bite.
"Well, I haven't heard you play in months, so will you play something on my guitar for me?"
"Mmmm, these are so great. Sure, what do you want to hear?"
"It doesn't matter. You pick," I said as I took a bite of his dessert. It really did taste like strawberry shortcake. Yummy.
"Well, when I was in the studio in December I heard a new song from an American band. They were there recording after I finished doing a demo for a producer. It isn't released yet, but I really loved the acoustic guitar and the piano, so I've been learning it."
"Are you telling me you only heard it once and you remember the entire thing?" I shook my head. He was so fucking amazing and he didn't even see it.
"Yeah, I guess." He shrugged as he picked up the guitar. I took a sip from the champagne and it was so sour after the sweetness of the Twinkie that my face wrinkled. Cade openly laughed at me.
"Ugh! Something has to be done about that." I took a large strawberry and squeezed it over my glass, letting the juice from the fruit mix with the champagne. I dropped the mushy mess into my glass and licked my fingers.
"Wait," he said as he pulled my hand toward him and sucked the juice of each of my fingers. His tongue swirled around and my heart thumped in my chest. "Mmmmm. You make that strawberry taste so delicious." He grinned at me.
"Okay, Cade. I know how talented your tongue is, but right now I want to hear the talent in your fingers."
He went to pick up the guitar as I went to wash the stickiness from my fingers in the bathroom.
"Are you sure you don't want to feel my talented fingers, instead?" I stopped and shook my head. I could hear the smile in his voice.
"Um... that is tempting, but why can't I have it all?" I flirted with him outrageously and knew he loved it.
"You know I'll give you anything you want." His eyes bore into mine as he settled back down on the bed with the guitar. Naked Cade and my guitar. Could it get any better than that? I bit my lip as I watched him begin to strum and pluck at the guitar.
"What's this song called? I love the melody."
"Call your name... I used to think about you a lot when I was in London this last time, during all that happened. I'd play this song over and over. I missed you so much and this song sort of spoke to me through my confusion."
"I'm so sorry."
He shook his head and looked at me with serious eyes, as he started to sing.
The words were perfect and the lyrics so spot on to our situation. I felt my chest constrict and the tears start to well in my eyes as I watched him. He was so beautiful, so talented and amazing. The pain behind his eyes was vivid as he sang. I figured he’d been singing this son
g to me every time he played it over the past three months, and I couldn't believe I caused him so much pain. All because I was afraid to talk to him; to confront the possibility that he might not want me. I should have known that was completely and utterly impossible. I dropped my head and first one then another tear fell. Stupid me.
When he finished the song, Cade's eyes were glassy as he set the guitar down and moved toward me. He gathered me close and his hand came up to the back of my head as I buried myself into him. My arms slipped around his back and I breathed him in.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," I said sadly. "I never meant to hurt you like that, Cade. Forgive me."
His arms tightened around me and I felt his lips at my temple.
"I'm sorry too. We both made mistakes but we're not going to make those mistakes again. I love you, so much. We have forever to be together. All of this bullshit just made me love you more, Brook, okay? Every time you touch my heart, whether it's pain or joy; I'll always love you more and more."
I gasped as a sob escaped my chest. I nodded and pulled back to look at him. His blue eyes were filled with tears too. I closed my eyes and the tears squeezed from my eyes and I felt my heart would explode. "Me too, see? I'm spilling over again. I'm fucking overflowing."
It was too much, so much emotion. Cade took me back in his arms and pulled me across the bed, his mouth latching onto mine. He made love to me again and again all night long, and it was more than I could ever dream of. Crying, laughing, loving, touching, devouring; we couldn't get enough of each other. By some miracle, I knew we never would.
It was always going to be this beautiful between us.
THE KNOCK ON my hotel room door startled me because I wasn't expecting anyone. As I dragged myself out of bed and made my way to the door I glanced at the alarm clock on the nightstand. It was only 11 AM and I didn't have to be on set until evening, so I’d been looking forward to sleeping in.
Crap.
Cade was with me until the early morning hours and we'd spent the night in each other's arms, doing little sleeping. It was so beautiful, but our insatiable appetite for each other was taking a toll on us. Even when we weren't making love, we were talking about anything and everything.
