Deuces Wild Boxed Set: Books 1-4: Beyond the Frontiers, Rampage, Labyrinth, Birthright

by Ell Leigh Clarke

  “Four of us. You always forget me,” Achronyx complained.

  Tabitha would have snarked him into submission, but she was still sore about the treatment he’d received on Zaphod. “Four. Sorry, Achronyx. The four of us have got it under control. But Bethany Anne?”

  The Empress tilted her head expectantly.

  Tabitha let it all out in a rush. “This place is weird as all hell. They enforce their tech ban with the tech you gave them. They don’t recognize digital entities as having rights, and they all act freaky. I can’t show you proof because my HUD was disabled at the time, but I met all these monks—”

  “The Order,” Bethany Anne cut in. “Yeah, they do things a little differently there. Was it Silan’s tonsure that did it?”

  Tabitha nodded wide-eyed. “Understatement much? So they sent your communication as normal, or so they said. Personally, I think the Skaine had something to do with it not getting to you.” She shuddered. “I’ve got to ask—did you check this place out before you gave them the planetary defenses?”

  “No, Tabitha, I just had BMW design a defense system for a planet I knew nothing about.” Bethany Anne arched an eyebrow. “What do you think?”

  “I think you must have sent Bobcat to look the place over. Only a drunkard would think this setup is nothing to bat an eye at.” Tabitha shrugged. “What? You asked. Do you know how the Order pays for all the charitable work they do?”

  Bethany Anne waved a hand. “Of course. They have all the entertainments on the station. They pay for everything that way. I liked the idea. Is that not working out?”

  “All except the adult entertainment,” Tabitha expanded. “The courtesans have been vanishing without a trace. Which, added to your missing communication just screams of people trafficking, and oh look, there’s a Skaine in the picture.”

  Bethany Anne pressed her lips together. “It sounds like your deduction is missing a few steps. What makes you think the Skaine is involved?”

  Tabitha huffed in exasperation. “Well, it’s not going to be the harmless human monk. I’m pretty sure he’s too high on good deeds to even think impure thoughts. The Yollin was the same. Nope, my money is on the Skaine.”

  Bethany Anne pursed her lips. “What bet did you all make?”

  “I bet that the Skaine is the bastard doing this. Ryu refused the bet at first, but Hirotoshi took it and went for the human. He’s wrong, though. It’s definitely the Skaine. There’s no such thing as a good Skaine.”

  Bethany Anne shrugged. “I’m inclined to agree. However, you are operating as an ambassador of the law, and you have to act like one. Do you have any proof the Skaine is involved?”

  Tabitha winced. “Well…not yet. But I’ll find it, and I’ll find out what happened to the missing workers.”

  Bethany Anne nodded. “I know you will. I also know that you would never take action without proof.”

  “What do you take me for?” Tabitha leaned in. “And when I’m done, I’m going to have a serious talk with the Order about their prejudices.” Tabitha folded her arms. “Poor Achronyx is too traumatized to even sass me.”

  “That is not true,” Achronyx cut in over the speaker. “You just don’t deserve my snark today.”

  “Aw, Achronyx, that’s sweet,” Tabitha cooed. She put a hand to the side of her mouth and stage-whispered to Bethany Anne, “See, totally out of character. If he were organic, I’d take him to the doctor.”

  Bethany Anne lifted an eyebrow. “Remember what I said about keeping things quiet, Tabitha. I will speak with the Order about making an exception for our EIs, but otherwise, you need to respect their wishes. You are not actually hurt, are you, Achronyx?”

  “No, my Empress,” Achronyx answered sheepishly. “I am simply bored.”

  Bethany Anne nodded. “So suck it up. You’re a big EI. Tabitha, see your assignment through within the strictures of local law, then get your ass home.”

  Tabitha sighed. “You’ve got it.”

  Chapter 4

  Tabitha and Nickie

  K’nthel System, Traveler’s Rest, Entertainment Level, Arena Three

  Hirotoshi and Ryu stood back to back in the center of the wide oval and worked a less deadly version of their craft than usual. The crowd bayed as one opponent after another fell at the hands of the ancient Japanese vampires.

  The fighters surrounded them but lost the advantage of numbers when they attacked in twos and threes, which made it easier for the Tontos to defend. Why do they always want to play the big hero? If they all rushed us at once, they’d maybe have a chance. Ryu punched a Yollin in the mandibles, pulling his fist back on the snap before the Yollin bit down. Surely they know they can’t win this way. We’ve been fighting for over an hour now. It’s obvious we’re not going to tire.

  Hirotoshi’s eyes sparkled as he spun and kicked the unknown alien in front of him, then followed through with an elbow to the face of the one who replaced it. This is the best workout we’ve had in a while.

  At least since we broke up that Skaine slave meet, Ryu agreed. I’m getting bored with this. Want to do the wall of death?

  Only if you promise to never tell Tabitha we cut loose like this. I have a reputation to uphold. Hirotoshi chuckled. The fighters appeared to have realized their lone-wolf tactics weren’t working. They are closing in a little. You may do the honors. They rotated a few steps and linked arms, then Hirotoshi lifted Ryu and spun him in a fast circle. Ryu stamped and kicked his way around the fighters, sending them flying like bowling pins.

  Hirotoshi released Ryu, and they closed in to protect each other once again. The only way to get backstage was to fight and win, and newcomers were expected to lose quickly. The fight boss had seen the potential and thrown everything he had at the Tontos. Consequently, they were surrounded by thirty fighters of varying disciplines and species.

  These odds aren’t exactly fair, Ryu bitched. Only thirty? Where’s the challenge?

  The challenge here is not to kill anyone. Hirotoshi punted the oncoming Yollin into the crowd. He knocked down a pair of burly humans, who promptly dragged the Yollin to his feet and began laying into him.

  True. Shall we end this? Tabitha will be returning soon.

  Hirotoshi agreed, and they stepped up their speed to vampiric levels. The fighters dropped like flies around them faster than the crowd could see. The crowd began to howl and throw their trash into the ring, skating the edge of uproar.

  The referee decided enough was enough and signaled the end of the fight. Of course, there was no way a tinny whistle could be heard above the melee. The klaxon to end all klaxons blared, dropping everyone present to their knees with the ear-splitting noise.

  The fight boss nodded to Hirotoshi and Ryu and waved them over, then handed them an envelope each and patted them on the back. “Great fight. I’d love to talk to you both about becoming regulars here. You know Harry will take good care of you.”

  Hirotoshi didn’t break the human’s hand since that would have been rude and they needed him for the moment. However, if Harry kept referring to himself in the third person, Hirotoshi wasn’t sure he would remain so restrained. “We might consider such an offer if the circumstances were right. Is there somewhere we can clean up before we speak?”

  The boss summoned a young man. “Take these gentlemen to the VIP changing area. Bring them anything they ask for.”

  The kid inclined his head and led Hirotoshi and Ryu through the maze of brightly-lit corridors in the backstage area to a sumptuous suite. “There are robes to wear while your clothing is in the autocleaner,” he told them enthusiastically. “And the bar is stocked with human-friendly food and drinks.” He dipped his head and left them to get settled.

  Hirotoshi waited until the door had closed behind their escort to glance at Ryu, whose head was buried in the fridge.

  “Human food,” Ryu announced. “Is this…” He dumped a wrinkled cucumber on the side. “And this.” He pulled out a small tub and opened the lid to sniff the contents
. A pungent sourness filled the air.

  “If that is yogurt, I do not want to know which animal they procured the milk to make it from,” Hirotoshi stated.

  “There are some crackers. Actually, I’ve changed my mind about being hungry.” Ryu sealed the pot and shoved it to the back of the fridge. “I wonder how long Tabitha will be.”

  “Long enough for us to investigate behind the scenes here.” Hirotoshi headed for the door. “I cannot hear anyone outside. Let’s go search Harry’s office. Something about him did not sit right with me.”

  They made their way along the corridor, looking into each room they passed. When they reached the junction in the corridor, they chose the opposite direction from the one they’d been brought along earlier. It led them past a series of storerooms, most of which were locked, and eventually ended at a large door.

  Hirotoshi took point. He opened the door and slipped inside while Ryu kept an eye on the corridor.

  It is clear, Hirotoshi announced a moment later.

  They padded silently through the reception area and made short work of the lock on Harry’s inner office. Hirotoshi made his way straight to the row of filing cabinets that lined one side of the office.

  Ryu opened a desk drawer and began to rummage through the contents. This is a little like the old days, he remarked. You know, before we had ADAM or Achronyx to do all the legwork for us.

  It is certainly nostalgic. Hirotoshi got to work searching the filing cabinets. He flicked through the drawers one at a time, pulling a folder out every now and again to get a closer look at the contents. He came across a section of unmarked files in the middle of a drawer which was at odds with the careful labeling of the others he’d examined. Ryu, I have found something.

  Already? What have you got? Ryu left the drawer he was searching and came over to the desk.

  Hirotoshi handed Ryu the file. I am unsure at the moment. However, this information is at odds with the rest of the accounting data I discovered. It looks as though Harry has been taking bribes.

  Ryu leafed through the paperwork. Not just Harry. There are a lot of hints about other people’s involvement here. This assignment is getting more complicated. What have we stumbled into?

  Hirotoshi was quiet for a beat while he searched for any other unlabeled files. It seems that our initial impression of a society working together for the good of all was just that, an impression. I am certain the Empress will be happy to know we are here to take the matter in hand. He sighed and removed the documents from each file before putting the empty folders back. I suppose we should be grateful that Harry is the arrogant type. He sighed and showed Ryu another sheaf of papers.

  Ryu peered at the document and shook his head in disbelief. He’s skimming from the profits as well? No wonder they don’t argue the no EI rule. This kind of fraud would be discovered in less than a minute. How do they sleep at night?

  See this? It gets worse. This goes beyond financial skullduggery. Hirotoshi handed Ryu the memo he’d just found tacked onto a financial breakdown.

  Ryu’s eyes widened as he read. He pointed out a name printed on the bottom of one of the documents. That is one of the leaders—the human who remained silent at the meeting, I believe. Tabitha is not going to take this well.

  You have been working on your gift for understatement, I see. Hirotoshi grimaced. I am not sure if Kemosabe will be able to restrain herself when she finds out about this.

  Finds out about what? Tabitha’s voice cut in. We’re back. You can meet me at the dock and tell me everything.

  On our way, Hirotoshi replied. He hesitated for a moment, then gathered the papers up.

  Tabitha made her way to the exit ramp. I’ll be back soon, she told Achronyx.

  I will be here hiding. His voice was small in her mind. I may decide that this tech-ban world is not so bad if you continue to be so nice to me.

  Don’t push it, she teased. You’re still a pain in my ass.

  Hirotoshi and Ryu were waiting when the ramp dropped. They strode up the ramp and past Tabitha.

  “What gives?” she asked, perplexed.

  We should discuss this somewhere we cannot be seen, Hirotoshi stated.

  Ryu nodded. You’re not going to like what we found one bit.

  Tabitha took in the deadly serious looks on both of their faces as she followed them aboard. “What? What have you found?”

  Hirotoshi handed the thick stack of paperwork to her.

  She scanned quickly through the documents, discarding each page as she finished it. The line between her eyes deepened with every sheet of paper she dropped, and she finally looked up with reddening eyes. “This will not stand. I will not allow it to stand.”

  Hirotoshi nodded. “I did not expect any less, Kemosabe.”

  Tabitha looked up at them, the last piece of paper scrunched in her hand, forgotten. “We’re going to turn this nest of snakes over and follow the trail of corruption right back to the source.”

  “And when we find it?” Ryu asked.

  Tabitha’s face was as hard as stone. “We’re going to cut its head off.”

  Rebus Quadrant, Themis Colony, Aboard the Penitent Granddaughter

  Nickie emerged from the ship in search of breakfast. Her days of eating cold food from a can were well and truly over. She’d been spoiled by Grim’s cooking.

  The problem was that Grim hardly bothered to cook aboard the Granddaughter anymore, since his culinary skills were much more appreciated by the colonists who attended the communal meals. She had no choice but to join them if she wanted a decent meal.

  She entered the mess hall and wove through the diners until she reached the serving line and found her epicurean Yollin. She grabbed a tray and joined the line. “What’s for breakfast, Grimmie-baby?”

  Grim’s entire body twitched in distaste. “Same as it was yesterday, doll face. Now get your eggs and stop holding up the line.”

  Nickie narrowed her eyes in mock-rage. “Touché. You win this round.” She grinned and held out the tray and Grim dumped her food onto it with a wink. “We’re working on the irrigation system today, right?”

  Grim nodded. “Durq is already out at the dome. I saw him just after dawn. He said something about Lisa having the afternoon shift and wanting to work in silence.”

  “Whatever. As long as he does his share.” Nickie half-shrugged and took her tray over to a table that had just been vacated. She had barely taken a mouthful when a shadow fell across her. She looked up with a scowl. “What?”

  Raynard took an involuntary step back. “I was just going to ask if you wanted some company. I can see you don’t, so I’ll go.” He turned to leave.

  Nickie waited for Meredith’s rebuke, but it didn’t come. She sighed. “Just fucking sit down already.” She caught sight of Adelaide hovering behind Raynard. “You too, Adelaide.”

  Adelaide gave Raynard a little shove with her hip and slipped onto the bench next to Nickie. “I wanted to talk to you about today’s tasks. I’m hoping that today is the day we get the water running. To the dome, at least.”

  Nickie wasn’t so sure. “I thought you still had a long way to go with the water line?”

  Raynard smiled and patted Adelaide’s arm. “Addie and the others have made great progress.”

  Adelaide nodded in agreement. “We’re almost there. It’s the last stretch before the colony. The buildings in that area were destroyed completely in the Skaine attack. We have to clear out the rubble and dig down to get to the pipeline before we can even think about repairing or replacing it.” Adelaide shrugged. “But I’m not going to let a little thing like that get in the way. We have the equipment to get it done, and you have an onboard EI who can interface with it…”

  Nickie frowned. “If she will. She’s quiet this morning.”

  Of course, I will, Meredith interjected.

  Oh, so you didn’t decide to deactivate yourself. I was beginning to wonder.

  I was giving you some space, Nickie. You might show a l
ittle gratitude.

  Someone woke up on the wrong side of the amygdala this morning.

  “Nickie?” Adelaide was waving a hand in front of Nickie’s face.

  Nickie snapped back to reality. “Meredith and I will operate the equipment. Let’s get this bitch dug.”

  Raynard laughed. “You know, that reminds me of what Pete would have said in this situation.”

  Adelaide giggled. “Oh, you’re right!”

  He and Adelaide put their heads together and chorused.

  “If it ain’t a bitch to get it, then it ain’t worth it.”

  “Who the hell wants an easy life?”

  A woman from the next table turned around. “What about ‘life’s a bastard, then you die?’ That was always my favorite.”

  “Yeah, that one too, Sue.” Raynard pushed his food around with his fork. “I always appreciated his outlook; it made the morning interesting. Things are a little different around here without Pete’s unique take on things.”

  “You mean without his constant grousing,” Sue retorted.

  That raised a laugh, albeit a small one.

  The conversation turned back to the day ahead, then Raynard and Adelaide left to get started. Nickie headed back to the breakfast line to see if there was any chance of seconds. Grim joined her shortly after with his own breakfast once everyone had been served. He sat across from Nickie and began to eat. “Did you get your ‘things’ taken care of last night?”

  Nickie looked up from her food, frowning for a moment until she remembered that she’d left dinner early last night. “Oh, yeah. It wasn’t a big deal. Something fucking hilarious happened after I left, though. I got a message.”

  Grim lowered his fork, intrigued. “A message? From who?”

  Nickie pointed at him. “That’s what I wanted to know. And when I found out, I wished I hadn’t bothered to open the damn thing at all. I thought we were pretty much hidden out here, but somehow the Federation knew where to find me.”

  “The Federation?” Grim asked.