* * *
THERE REALLY WASN’T any decision at all. Robin understood why Seth had worried that she might feel pressured. It was right for a man with his sense of integrity. She’d gotten mad, but really he’d been trying to protect her. Again.
She stepped forward, smile tremulous. “Good.”
His arms came around her hard. She held on tightly, too.
“Will you go up to my bedroom?” he asked, voice rough. “Let me do a last check down here.”
“Okay.” She let go, feeling his equal reluctance as he released her. “Hurry.”
Robin dashed upstairs, pausing only to release the spring-loaded gate at the top and reattach it when she was on the other side. Along with corralling Jacob, it would slow down an intruder.
She rushed to the bathroom to brush her teeth before tiptoeing into her bedroom to check on Jacob. Sometimes he curled into a tight ball to sleep; other times, like now, he sprawled in a careless way that made it easy to picture the future when her little boy would be taller than her, with a deep voice and whiskers.
She cocked her head. Had she heard a bell tinkling? That was strange. Robin tugged Jacob’s covers higher and then stepped out of the bedroom to find Seth coming down the hall toward her, his eyes locked in on hers.
Her mouth dried. Just like that, she was a woman, not a mother. His purposeful stride was pure male, predatory in a good way.
He glanced past her into the guest room. “Asleep?” he murmured.
She nodded. “I heard something.”
He nudged her a few steps down the hall and into his bedroom, dominated by a king-size bed. “I tied bells to doorknobs downstairs and to both child gates.”
“You set up the one at the bottom, too?”
“I did.” His voice was as intense as his eyes. “I want you to feel safe.”
“To be able to think about nothing but you.”
“Yes.”
“I can do that,” she whispered, and he kissed her, possessive, greedy...and tender.
Chapter Thirteen
Seth steered her to his bed, where he turned on a lamp. Robin was briefly jarred from the mood when he reached behind his back and produced a handgun that he set on the bedside stand.
Then, instead of kissing her, he began slowly undressing her. After pulling her shirt off over her head, he unhooked her bra. Robin wriggled her shoulders so the straps slid off and the bra dropped to her feet. He stopped for a long moment, his eyes heated as he looked. Matching desire lit coals low in her belly.
She wanted to see him, too. He stood still while she unbuttoned his shirt, but took over to shrug out of it and toss it away. He was beautiful with those wide shoulders and powerful chest, defined muscles that tightened and jerked when she splayed her hands on him and explored. Finding the circle of puckered skin on his side below his ribs, she paused for a brief moment of combined fear and thankfulness that he’d survived. He lasted a whole minute or two, then said, “I want you naked.”
They stripped in record time, her able to kick off her slip-ons, Seth having to kneel to untie his boots. She heard a thud when one hit a wall. While he was unbuttoning his trousers, Robin pulled back the covers and crawled onto the bed.
In seconds, he was with her, over her. Kissing her with such tenderness, her bones seemed to dissolve. At last he kissed his way down her throat, rubbed a scratchy cheek on her chest and then reared up to take her nipple into his mouth. She cried out, whimpering when she felt the rhythmic pull all the way to her toes. She kneaded what she could reach of his back. Weight on his elbow, he switched to the other breast.
By the time he returned to her mouth, Robin was desperate. Her fingers dug into those strong muscles as she tried to pull him closer. She wanted him inside her with unfamiliar urgency, but if anything he slowed down, stroking her body and finding every sensitive spot, until finally his fingers slid between her legs.
Her back spasmed into an arch as she felt herself tightening, tightening. “Please,” she heard herself say. “Now.”
He was there, pressing against her, when suddenly he lurched away.
She heard a ripping sound and within seconds, he was back, seating himself deep with a long thrust. And then he did it again, and again, and her body instinctively matched his pace.
This felt glorious, and yet she was frantic, too. She didn’t have to chase an orgasm; it slammed into her. Even as she spasmed, he made a guttural sound and went rigid.
When he sagged down on her, he rolled, taking her with him. Robin ended up with her head on his shoulder, where she could both feel and hear his racing heartbeat. She laid her hand right atop his heart, where it seemed to belong.
And then a chill trickled through her bloodstream. She’d been afraid he wouldn’t trust her if she told him all her secrets, but her silence suddenly felt wrong.
She had to tell him everything...but not now. It wouldn’t be so terrible if she waited, would it?
He planned to work from home for a few days, so she could talk to him in the morning. Give herself the rest of the night. Soak up all the memories she could, in case his reaction to her confessions was what she expected. Of course he wouldn’t be able to ignore the things she’d done...and not done.
But he was hers for tonight.
* * *
HOLDING ROBIN CLOSE, stunned, Seth knew he should say something but had no idea what. The thoughts he was having were wildly premature.
“That was amazing,” he said after a moment.
Robin murmured something indecipherable.
Apparently she hadn’t taken offense, because they made love twice more during the night, and, having awakened to the gray light of dawn, Seth had just cupped his hands around her breasts when a perplexed “Mommy?” came from the hall.
“Damn,” he muttered.
Robin shot up, disheveled and disoriented, clutching the covers. “What? Where—Jacob?”
“Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.”
“Jacob?” Robin breathed. “Seth, I don’t suppose you can reach any of my clothes.”
“Uh...” Seth leaned over the edge of the bed and was able to snag her panties and jeans. And, stretching, his shirt.
“I’m in here,” she called.
“Mommy?” Jacob appeared, wafting the smell of urine. “The bed is wet.”
“I can handle this,” Seth suggested. Beneath the covers, he yanked on his knit boxers, then swung his feet to the floor and stood. “How about I start you a bath while Mommy gets dressed?”
“Yeah!” Jacob snagged his hand.
Seth grinned over his shoulder at Robin, who still looked discombobulated.
An hour later, the sense of happiness and optimism he’d started the day with had waned. He’d known that sleeping with Robin would change their relationship. How could it not? What he hadn’t expected was her to shut him out.
Her smiles were polite and didn’t reach her eyes. She jumped up and left the table when Jacob finished eating. Seth was left to finish alone. When he wandered after them to the living room, she concentrated her attention on Jacob. Tiny worry lines scored her forehead. She kept her distance, pretending not to notice when he held out a hand to her.
She did focus on him after he called the hospital. “Will they let your dad come home today?”
“He needs to wait to see the doctor around eleven. He says the nurse thinks he’ll be released.”
“Oh. Oh, that’s good.”
Jacob tugged at her shirt. “Mommy, look!”
She admired the tower he’d built and clapped when he toppled it.
Feeling invisible, Seth went back to the kitchen and poured another cup of coffee.
What was going on? He’d swear the night had been as good for her as it was for him, so why would she regret anything about it?
Brooding wouldn’t help, so Seth ope
ned his laptop and went online to check his email. He scanned the list. Nothing new from Hammond. Had the sergeant been able to leave an officer watching Winstead’s house? Likely not, given the usual budgetary restraints.
His phone rang, a county deputy letting him know that two houses on the outskirts of town had been broken into during the night and the usual electronics, wallets and jewelry taken.
“Fits the profile,” the frustrated deputy reported. “One couple was out of town. It was a neighbor who saw the back door open and called. The other family slept through the intrusion.”
Frowning, Seth tipped his chair back on two legs. “They’ve been careful so far not to enter homes when people are there.”
“Method of entry was the same.”
Mostly flimsy back-door locks had been jimmied. Why did people bother with dead bolts on the front if they were going to make it so easy to break into their houses through other doors or windows? Seth particularly disliked exterior doors that had glass panes. Witness yesterday’s break-in here. He had so far been unable to persuade his father to replace the damn door, although he’d already made up his mind to do it without asking permission.
“You going to try for fingerprints?” he asked now.
“Captain says yes. He’s ticked.”
“I am, too. Haven’t heard yet, but I’ll let you know if anyplace in town got hit last night.”
As he set down the phone, he saw Robin hesitating just inside the kitchen. Jacob was settled in watching a movie.
“Are you busy?” she asked.
“No.” He nodded at the chair across the table. “Coffee?”
“I think I’ll pour myself some water.”
She did so and sat down. He could only call her expression bleak. “There are...things I haven’t told you.”
No kidding. He raised his eyebrows while keeping his mouth shut.
Her gaze slid away. “I should have told you before we...” She stole a look at his face.
“I’m listening.”
She shifted in place, moistened her lips and blurted, “I killed a man.”
The front legs of his chair crashed back to the floor. “What?”
“I think I killed him,” Robin said more softly.
“You think.”
“I didn’t hang around to be sure, okay?”
Seth stared at her. “Start at the beginning.”
Hot spots of color on her cheeks and tightly clasped hands betrayed how artificial her calm was. “It was after the divorce. When I saw the chance to sneak out of Richard’s house, there wasn’t time to go back for anything. I didn’t care about clothes or... But I kept some things that were important to me in a box on the shelf in the closet.”
He didn’t like where this was going.
“I read online that Richard would be away for a few days, on some kind of conference in San Francisco. I chose a day the housekeeper would be off. I’d have been out of luck if he’d changed the gate code and lock, but he hadn’t, so I let myself in. The house was completely silent.” Her throat worked. “I hurried upstairs and felt so lucky to find the box where I’d left it. I grabbed it, but when I turned around, he was there.”
“The bodyguard,” Seth guessed. Dread filled his stomach.
“Yes. I’m sorry, I do know his name. It’s—it was—Brad McCormick. He gave me this nasty smile and said, ‘The boss knew what he was talking about. Here you are, right on time.’ And then he grabbed me and started dragging me toward the door.” Her voice wobbled.
“Robin.”
Naked anguish in her eyes, she said, “Let me finish.”
He managed a nod.
“I dropped the box on the bed. I was fixated on not letting anything get broken, which sounds stupid, but—” She hunched her shoulders. “I fought. He...seemed to enjoy it. I thought he might rape me.”
He wasn’t sure he was capable of speech.
“I managed to scramble away enough to get my hands on the lamp. The base was wrought iron and stained glass, and it was really heavy. I hit him in the head and he just...fell over. I picked up my box because if I didn’t anyone would know I’d been there, and I left. Waiting for the bus, I was shaking and my teeth were chattering and I knew I should call 9-1-1 in case he wasn’t dead, but how could I? So I didn’t do anything, which is one more thing to feel guilty about.”
“He assaulted you.” He didn’t recognize his own voice.
“But I was trespassing. With the divorce final, I didn’t have any right to be there.”
Seth shook his head. “You should have been able to pack the things that were important to you when you told your husband that the marriage was over.”
She let out a shuddery breath that might have been a sob. “I did have a social worker call and ask him for the small things that were important to me. She offered to meet him. He laughed and hung up on her.”
“So you tried doing it the civilized way.” Was he making excuses for her? Seth discovered he didn’t care.
Robin squeezed her hands together so hard it had to be painful. “I watched the newspaper. I kept expecting to get arrested. But the police never came, and I never saw anything about the death in the paper or online.”
“I can’t believe Winstead wouldn’t have accused you if he found his employee dead in the master bedroom.” He hesitated. “Were there surveillance cameras?”
Shock slowly altered her face. “I...don’t know.”
“You might have only knocked him out, you know.”
“I hoped, but I hit him hard. There was a lot of blood.” She closed her eyes. “I’ve been so afraid ever since then that I’d be arrested and convicted and he’d get Jacob.”
Unable to sit still any longer, Seth shoved his chair back. “I swear that won’t happen.” His commitment to the letter of the law had just been supplanted by something more important.
“How can you promise that?”
“Unless he has time-and date-stamped footage showing you entering the house, how can he prove you were there? That you hit this Brad McCormick over the head? There could have been burglars in the house. He could have been in his boss’s bedroom because he was in league with them, only there was a falling out.” Seth stalked toward the patio door.
She protested, “But my fingerprints would be on the lamp!”
He swung around. “Sure they were. You shared that bedroom for two years. The surprise would be if your prints weren’t on the thing.”
“The housekeeper...”
“Dusting doesn’t remove fingerprints.”
Robin’s headshake looked dazed. “If I hadn’t already known I was pregnant, I would have gone to the police. I hope you believe that.”
He went to her and crouched beside her. “You have to know I do,” he said roughly.
Her eyes shimmered. “There’s something else you need to know.” She became fascinated with the the tabletop.
Seth stood, looking down at her. In this light, he could see the auburn roots of her hair better. It made her look vulnerable, as if she’d quit protecting herself from him.
“Will you sit down?” she asked timidly.
Was she afraid of his reaction? Hating to think that, he confined himself to a nod. He walked to the doorway first to reassure himself that Jacob was okay. The boy seemed engrossed by the Disney movie.
Then he forced himself to sit across the table from Robin again. Her face was as colorless as he’d ever seen it. Against that backdrop, her eyes were dark and bruised.
“I’ve mentioned my sister.”
He braced himself.
* * *
“A FEW YEARS AGO, Allie—short for Allison—was diagnosed with a kidney disease called glomerulonephritis. Doctors don’t know what caused it. A lot of the common triggers don’t apply to her. It turned out she had only one kidney.” Keep
ing her gaze deliberately unfocused so she didn’t have to see Seth’s reaction, Robin kept to a near-monotone. “She had to move home. At first she kept working, but she couldn’t when she started dialysis. I was still married when her doctor started talking about a transplant. I got tested and was a match.”
Of course, Seth had seen her torso and knew she had no scar from surgery.
“When Richard found out I’d been tested, he flipped out. His wife wasn’t giving away a body part. He seemed repulsed by the idea that I’d be left with a scar.” She took a deep breath. “I had already made up my mind to leave him, and Allie wasn’t desperate.”
“But by the time you were free, you knew you were pregnant.”
“Yes.” When the pregnancy test came up positive, she felt so conflicted that it was like the shocking aftermath of a car accident. She had to be sure she could love this baby, Richard’s child. Feeling in her heart that she could came as a huge relief. Guilt was in the mix, because Allie was counting on her, ebullient with hope, and now Robin wouldn’t be accepted as a kidney donor for nearly a year.
She went on, “Her kidney has continued to fail. They’ve searched for another donor, but have not found anyone.” She made herself meet Seth’s eyes. “I could have done it, but I was afraid to go back to Seattle. Afraid Richard would find out. My mother wouldn’t be able to stand up to him to keep Jacob safe.” She made herself look at him, see a hard gaze out of eyes gone a turbulent blue. Focusing on her hands, she finished in a voice barely above a whisper. “I’m the only person who can save her, and I won’t. Allie must hate me. It’s...one reason I don’t call home more often.”
There. Now he knew, and would despise her.
Only...Seth had circled the table and picked her up as effortlessly as if she were a child. He sat down, Robin on his lap, cradled within the solid strength of his arms. She buried her face against his chest so he couldn’t see it.
“I do not believe your sister hates you.”
He sounded so gentle, Robin felt a tremble deep inside, as if a fault line was shifting.
“We know that Richard has hunted long and hard for you. He has to have spent a fortune paying investigators. Do you think for a minute that he wouldn’t be watching your mother and sister? That if she were to go in for surgery, he wouldn’t know?”
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