Rage

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Rage Page 16

by Michelle Pace


  Cheyenne and Scot entered the dining room holding hands.

  Steph shifted her eyes away from them to Liam; they were posi-

  tively glowing, and it was almost painful to witness that level of happiness.

  “’Ello, son!” Scot boomed, scooping Liam out of his seat

  and kissing him loudly on the cheek in rapid fire succession.

  Liam squealed and giggled hysterically. Cheyenne plopped into

  the chair next to Stephanie. Nathan smiled at her knowingly.

  “Thanks for the sound effects last night. Your enthusiasm

  really motivated Saffron to up her game.” He raised a glass to-

  ward Cheyenne, who turned a vivid shade of fuchsia. She

  glanced at her husband and covered a smiled with her hand. Scot

  wriggled his eyebrows up and down at his wife looking like a

  super-hot version of Groucho Marx. A sideways grin tugged on

  Steph’s lips. She remembered how hard Cheyenne had fought

  against Scot’s pursuits when they first met. Steph had always

  been partial to Scot. He was so genuine and approached Fury in

  a business-like manner she found admirable. He never seemed to

  be caught up in his own press like Nathan, and unlike Phillip, he didn’t deceive himself that he was “changing the world through

  art.” Phillip. His name rolled around like a poisoned marble in her brain. Steph felt as if she were being pelted with tiny shards of loneliness. She rolled her eyes at herself beneath her sunglass-135

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  es and took another big swig of coffee.

  She pulled her satellite phone from her purse. Cheyenne

  reached out after her as if about to tell her something urgent, but Steph held up a finger for her to wait. She wandered to the far

  edge of the infinity pool as she pulled up Christopher’s number

  and pressed the call button. She had no idea what would come

  out of her mouth, but she’d waited way too long to call him back and had to do or say something. She went directly to voicemail.

  She shook her head. He must be in a meeting, she thought. She

  suddenly needed to hear his reassuring voice.

  She felt a bit sentimental as she remembered the night she

  agreed to start seeing Chris. She’d gone to a New Year’s Eve

  party at Rick Gervais’s house, mostly because Gordon Ramsey

  was going to be there, and she was obsessed with him. When he

  called to invite her, Ricky made her promise she’d do her im-

  pression of Gordon for Gordon, but when the time came, Steph ironically found Gordon incredibly intimidating. Thankfully,

  Gordon ended up being surprisingly cool and down to earth, and

  right after she’d shouted at him to ‘fuck off out of her kitchen’ in a flawless accent, she turned around and found herself face to

  face with her agent.

  “Christopher!” It was quite a surprise to see him in a social

  setting. He wore a bold navy suit, and Steph was struck by how

  handsome he looked with his new nose courtesy of Phillip Ker-

  sey. It had been awkward between them since he confessed his

  feelings were more than just professional for her, and they’d on-ly spoken by email and via text since that time.

  “I see you’re insulting my client.” Christopher smirked, and

  Steph looked over her shoulder at Gordon Ramsey.

  “He’s your client, too?” she laughed, and Christopher nod-

  ded.

  “They give me all the ‘challenging personalities,’” he dead-

  panned, and she laughed.

  “Hey, now! At least I didn’t punch him.” His lips curled in

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  an appreciative grin, and he whirled her onto the dance floor and promptly pulled her securely into his strong arms. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy it in a Disney Princess sort of way.

  Within three songs, he reaffirmed his interest in dating her.

  “Do you like French cuisine?” He pulled her closer against

  him, and she felt the odd tingling sensation she hadn’t felt in far too long.

  Stephanie opened her mouth to decline and was surprised

  when she didn’t want to. She hadn’t dated a “civilian” since

  Pace, and considering how poorly her last two relationships had

  gone, shifting gears might be just what she needed to do.

  “Sure. You can take me out for French food some time. No

  escargot, though. Maybe French fries.”

  A week later, he turned up on the doorstep of her Paris

  apartment with an overnight bag, and the rest was history.

  She tried to call him once more, and once more the call

  went to voicemail. She swore at herself and hit the disconnect

  button. She had an ominous sense of déjà vu, wondering if she

  should check her email for a letter of resignation and a separate

  “Dear John” letter.

  When she returned to the group, she noticed they’d been

  joined by David and Yara. As Steph took a vacant seat near the

  empty end of the table, she noticed Yara’s face was bright red,

  and she was raving to Cheyenne about something. Cheyenne

  looked like she was trying to keep a poker face.

  “So I went to their room, and they were still passed out in

  their beds. I counted seven hairy men in their rooms. Seven!

  What a bunch of cadelas!” Yara gesticulated wildly with her

  hands. Saffron shrugged, and David chuckled.

  “Yes, it’s hilarious, David!” She glared at her groom-to-be,

  and he sipped his coffee quietly. “And you two!”

  Steph looked over her shoulder to see who Yara was yelling

  at and saw Phillip and Bret sauntering up. Both men looked at

  each other in obvious confusion.

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  “You had them doing booby shots before they even got to

  the bar last night.”

  “Body shots, darling.” David offered as Nathan cackled.

  “Whatever! Thanks for contributing to their antics,” she

  snapped. Phillip glanced uncertainly at David, and Bret

  shrugged.

  “What? Did they get arrested or something?” Bret asked,

  and Cheyenne made a motion with her hands to silence him.

  Steph tried not to laugh and glanced toward Phillip, who seemed

  to be enamored with her boots. She crossed her legs defensively, and his eyes slowly shifted to her face. He seemed caught off

  guard that she was watching him, and without releasing her gaze, he swiftly took the seat next to her. Steph felt her eyebrows

  shoot skyward in surprise as he turned his entire body to face

  her, leaning in as if he were going to start a private conversation.

  A hushed silence fell over the table, and Steph yanked her

  eyes away from Phillip’s to see the assembled band members

  gawking at them.

  “Feeling a bit bold today, Kersey?” Nathan’s droll delivery

  made Bret snort. Cheyenne shot Nathan a deadly glance.

  “Shut up!” she snarled and stood, crossing to Steph’s side.

  “Stephanie, I need your help with something before we leave.”

  Steph realized her chest was rising and falling rapidly. Her

  cheeks felt feverishly hot. She stood automatically and followed Cheyenne with a backward glance at Phillip, who had flopped

  back in his chair looking frustrated.

  Once they were around the corner by the hammocks, Chey-

  enne spun on her.

  “What was
that?” Steph asked, and Cheyenne shrugged in

  genuine confusion.

  “Did you get ahold of Christopher?” Cheyenne asked, peek-

  ing through the windows at the group behind them. Steph

  glanced back over her shoulder, suddenly feeing paranoid.

  “I just tried. No answer.”

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  “Try again,” Cheyenne snapped.

  “Chill out, Cheyenne. What the hell’s with you?”

  Cheyenne grabbed Steph’s arm, her eyes emphatic. “Phillip

  knows.”

  “Knows what?” The look on Cheyenne’s face told her eve-

  rything she needed to know. A tidal wave of nausea swept over

  Stephanie, and she shoved Cheyenne out of the way as she ran to

  the nearest bush and threw up.

  As she stood, gasping for air, Cheyenne spoke. Her voice

  was calm and matter-of-fact.

  “I told you to tell him last night.”

  “Well I didn’t! So who the hell did?” Steph sucked in a

  large amount of air, trying to keep some of her breakfast down.

  “Cedric. It seems he didn’t realize that Phillip didn’t know.

  Because, you see, it’s just fucking madness that you didn’t tell him ages ago.” Her nonchalant delivery would normally have

  made Steph verbally attack her, but she’d been thrown off her

  game.

  “Dammit, Cedric!” Steph exclaimed, and Cheyenne glow-

  ered at her furiously.

  “He’s leaving. Today, actually…in a couple of hours. He

  said something about not wanting to enable you anymore. He’s a

  pretty wise man. Are you sure the two of you are related?” Steph was too stunned to respond.

  “Cheyenne…” She finally found her voice, scratchy from

  vomiting.

  “I don’t want to hear it, Steph. I’m tired of listening to your

  twisted logic, and I’m pretty much tired of talking to you. Or

  should I say talking at you? It’s like talking to a brick wall.”

  Cheyenne turned and headed back in the direction of the group.

  Steph stood staring after her. She scrambled around the building and made her way up to her room, where Kara was putting on

  her shoes.

  “Good God! You look like shite! What’s on your dress?”

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  she asked. Steph grabbed a black sundress from her suitcase and

  vanished into the bathroom without a word. She hurriedly

  cleaned up, reapplied make-up, and brushed her teeth. She raced

  to the front desk to arrange for a ride to Cedric’s pousada. She had the same chauffer, Enrique, with whom t she always seemed

  to get stuck. This time, Enrique wouldn’t even look at her for the entire ride.

  Without knocking, she flung open the door to Cedric’s

  room. He was zipping up his suitcase.

  He peered at his watch. “I was wondering how long it

  would be before you showed up.”

  “Why can’t you ever keep your mouth shut?”

  “Funny, I’m usually the one saying that to you.”

  “You had no right!” Steph’s exasperation was crippling, and

  she had to sit on the edge of the bed.

  Cedric shrugged. “That’s true. And yet Phillip had every

  right to know.”

  “What did you say to him exactly?” Steph asked as her

  mind raced.

  “I’m not giving you a blow by blow, so you can try to find

  some way to spin this.” Cedric slung his bag over his shoulder.

  “You have a lot of thinking to do, baby sister. And a hell of a lot of growing up to do.”

  “Piss, off Cedric. Who died and made you judge and jury?”

  The look on his face stopped her from saying another syllable.

  He took a step toward her, and she withdrew a step on instinct.

  His eyes were hard and unforgiving. ““If you could have

  seen Phillip's face after you collapsed that day, you would have never let him go.”

  He left without as much as a second glance in her direction.

  As she watched him go, Steph collapsed back on the bed. He was

  right, as always. She was responsible for it all. She fought back angry tears, and she argued with herself for ten minutes before

  jumping back into the SUV and having Enrique drive her to the

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  tiny island airport. When she spotted Cedric, she hurried over to him. His shoulders heaved with a silent sigh when he saw her

  coming.

  Tears sprung from her eyes, and she flung her arms around

  him. For a moment, she felt like a fool as she clung to him like a bawling baby, but his cane-free arm soon came up around her,

  and she knew they were okay. She pulled back, and he had al-

  ready produced a handkerchief.

  “Oh, Steffy. If you weren’t my only sister, I would have

  shunned you long ago.” His droll tone had a teasing quality, and she knew he was trying to make her smile.

  A short time later, she’d finally managed to collect herself.

  They sat silently side by side, waiting for his plane to board.

  “I’m sorry. You’re right. I’m so sorry I put you in the mid-

  dle of all my shit, as always.” She sighed.

  “You know, I was thinking about all of this last night. Your

  deception caused the fight between Phillip and Christopher, you

  see that, right? Chris knew about the baby—you told him right away. He assumed Phillip knew as well. So when Phillip was

  flippant about your feelings after that wretched video, it drove Christopher to violence.”

  “Thanks a lot, bro. As if I don’t feel shitty enough.”

  “Good. I hope you do feel shitty. You need to feel some-

  thing, Steffy. You need to hear me for once.” He shook his head in exasperation. His expression turned somber, and he whirled to face her. Steph had little choice but to turn to face him out of respect.

  “Do you want to know the last thing mom said to me?” His

  eyes were moist, and Steph felt her pulse quicken. It had been

  years since he’d tried to discuss their mother with her. Her mom had crossed her mind many times in the past year, and Steph was

  nervous to hear what he had to say.

  “No.” She admitted, suddenly very afraid.

  “Take care of your sister for me.” He paused, as if unable to

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  speak for a moment, and Steph covered her eyes with her hand,

  feeling as if he’d kicked her in the stomach. She literally felt as if she’d taken a hit, and the wind had been knocked out of her. “All these years I’ve bent over backwards to do just that.”

  “No. You ditched me to run off to seminary.” It was a des-

  perate argument, and she knew it wasn’t fair as she spoke the

  words.

  He held up a hand to silence her. “But now you’re all grown

  up. I love you, Stephanie. But it’s time to face your demons. And you have to do that all on your own.”

  “Cedric…” Steph whispered, but they called for him to

  board the plane, and he stood.

  “Call me when you get back to Milan.” He instructed her

  and left before she had a chance to reply.

  On her way back from the airport, she remembered her

  mother in vivid detail for the first time since her death. Her clas-sically beautiful baby face, so much like Steph’s, now that she’d reached womanhood. In truth, part of her thought about her mom

  every time she looked in the mirror. Her scent as sh
e read her

  bedtime stories, her curly blonde hair always smelling like milk and honey. Her gentle demeanor that Cedric had obviously in-herited. Her mother had always cringed at Steph and Adam’s

  constant bickering. Not long after Steph turned fourteen, she got herself kicked out of Catholic school. She’d been an angst-ridden teenager, and hormones made her already over-the-top temper

  crescendo. As a result, she and her father’s screaming matches

  were unrelenting and constant. This led her parents to bicker

  with each other. After weeks of hushed arguments, Steph over-

  heard her mother tell her father she was leaving. He begged her

  not to go, but she insisted she had to because she couldn’t stand

  “the ugliness of their household” any longer. Steph knew she’d

  been the root cause of her abandoning them.

  When they sat them down to tell them, Cedric begged his

  mom to take him with her. Steph’s cheeks flushed as she re-

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  membered the feeling of being betrayed—by both of them. Ra-

  ther try to help smooth things over, Stephanie went wild. She’d

  accused her mom of sleeping around and told her she hated her

  and never wanted to speak to her again. A short time later, when Mom and Cedric were hit by the drunk driver, Steph felt like it

  was God’s punishment. Months later, when Cedric left and

  joined the seminary, it only seemed to confirm these fears. Deep down she’d always believed her parents’ impending divorce had

  been one more shitty thing she was responsible for.

  She was nearly back to the Maravilha, when her phone

  rang. Her stomach sank. as she assumed it was Christopher, but

  she was surprised to see Cheyenne’s number.

  “Hello?” she said, expecting Cheyenne to apologize. In-

  stead, she heard Yara’s grating, broken English.

  “We had to leave you! Where are you? Meet us at Forte

  Dos Remédios!” She hung up before Steph could reply. After a

  quick trip back to the hotel for her cameras, Steph had Enrique

  drop her off at the ruins of the fort. She was fiddling with her camera settings, and when she looked up, she nearly stumbled.

  The view of the crumbling fort from above was a shutterbug’s

  dream, and her camera was clicking away before she was con-

  sciously aware of it. She wandered downward into the ruins, tak-

 

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