by Glina Fastiv
I'm hot, sweating, red, and panting. I think I have tears I my eyes. "Leah." I whisper and smile a little.
She shakes her head and kisses my lips, "mmhm, that was...." She mumbles.
Mmhm is right. Damn.
16
Ten minutes have passed by and Leah and I are still laying here on the bathroom floor, wet as ever. We are literally just laying here... holding hands and looking at each other. What is wrong with me?
"I have never experienced anything like that...ever." I finally break my silence and she smiles slowly.
"I'm glad I could give it to you." She whispers to me.
I sigh and sit up, looking down at my boobs to find a tiny little purple faded mark.
"I'm sorry I interrupted your shower..." I laugh and she sits up too.
"I'm glad you did. Help me finish it." She says.
I smile and we both take actual showers and then get out and get dressed. Soon enough we find ourselves in her bed.
"You up for a talk?" She asks me.
I nod my head yes and she grabs my hand and squeezes it. "Jennifer, I've hooked up with girls before... a lot of girls! But- you're- it's more than that with you. I have feelings for you... I have had feelings for you from the moment I first spoke to you and I know it's wrong. You were engaged to my brother but... I can't help it. I like you... I want something more with you." She admits.
I bite my cheek and put my hand on her face and use my thumb to stroke her cheek. "Leah... I'm flattered. I am, but I don't know what to do here. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel anything for you... clearly I do. I've never been with a girl and you just.... you just completely changed things for me." I say and laugh a little bit. "How could we ever make it work with your brother?" I ask her and she sighs and closes her eyes.
"I don't know... I just know I want you." She says.
I just stare at her and she sits up and put her hand on my waist and leans over me to kiss me slowly. Naturally, we end up making out for several minutes and then we both sort of roll over and fall asleep... cuddled up and everything. Just like that...
17
Leah's phone starts ringing, waking both of us up. She lazily rolls over and answers it, half asleep. I hear her talking and she's calm at first, then her voice gets panicky. The last thing I hear her say is "I'm on my way."
I watch her jump up and grab some sweatpants from her closet and she throws on a bra and some shoes.
"What's wrong?" I ask her and sit up, getting concerned.
"I have to go to the hospital. One of my friends was in a car accident." She explains and runs into the bathroom, brushing her teeth at turbo speed.
Of course I'm not going to just lay here. I get up and put my own clothes on as quickly as I can.
Leah practically sprints down the stairs and I try my best to keep up.
"You don't have to come." She says and I grab her wrist and she stops and looks at me.
"Hey, calm down. I'm going with you, and I'm driving. You're too anxious to drive right now." I tell her.
She takes a deep breath and nods her head. We go get into my car and I drive to the hospital as fast as I legally can.
Once Leah and I get to the hospital I follow her lead. She gets us up to the waiting area and starts hugging people who are already there. I hear mumbled conversations about what's going on, but I'm still pretty clueless.
"Jennifer, come here." Leah says.
I walk over and she introduces me to three of her friends and I smile and say hello. Suddenly, a man walks in. He's tall and very attractive. He's got a small, well-groomed beard and crystal blue eyes.
While I'm gawking, Leah walks over and hugs the guy for a long time. He squeezes her with his free arm... I guess I failed to notice the small child in his other.
"I'm so sorry." Leah mumbles and he kisses her head. "We'll get through it, they're taking her into surgery soon." He says, hopefulness in his voice.
Leah takes the blonde haired and blue eyed little girl into her arms. "Hi baby!" She says and she little girl smiles at Leah. She's probably one... maybe two at the most. She's adorable as can be though.
"Blake, this is Jennifer. Can you say hi?" Leah says and puts her hand up to wave at me.
The little girl waves shyly, leaning further into Leah's chest.
"This is Blake. She's Asher and Lydia's daughter. Asher, meet Jennifer." Leah says, finally introducing me to the man I was just admiring.
I shake his hand and suddenly feel guilty for drooling over a man whose wife is fighting for her life right now.
"Nice to meet you, Jennifer." He says.
"You too." I say.
"You look exhausted baby. Go get a coffee or something. I can take Blake for a while." Leah offers.
Asher takes a breath and nods, "you're a saint. Thank you." He says and quickly walks down the hall and out the door.
I sit down next to Leah and she keeps talking to and playing with Blake.
"She's adorable." I smile.
Leah nods her head, "she's my god daughter." We sit and play with Blake for several minutes and then Leah hands her to me. "I'm gonna go check something." She says.
I take the baby and do my best to keep her entertained... even though I have never been much of a baby person. Hours pass and things haven't changed. I'm tired and hungry, Leah has to be too. Asher is pacing back and forth and has been for hours... I feel horrible for him.
"Leah, why don't we go get something to eat? We can take Blake with us... then Asher won't have to worry." I suggest.
She nods her head and picks up the baby again, walking over to Asher. He kisses his daughter goodbye and Leah and I leave the hospital.
I think this is the very first time I've ever had a car seat in my car... I seriously never hang around babies.
"You okay?" I ask Leah and reach over into the passenger seat for her hand.
I squeeze her hand once she slips it into mine and she looks at me, putting her sunglasses on.
"I don't know what to think." She says. Her voice does the thing it does when people are fighting tears... it breaks my heart.
"Stay positive. Hope for the best... that's all you can do right now. I know it's hard, but you have to be strong, okay?" I say and she nods her head and looks out the window again.
We get to a restaurant and the three of us go inside to eat. Leah spends most of our time here feeding Blake small pieces of various foods and watching the faces she makes while she does it. I see her laughing and smiling genuinely for the first time today.
"You like kids, huh?" I smile.
She looks up at me and grins, "I love them."
"You're good with them..." I point out.
"You think?" She asks, wrinkling her nose.
"Absolutely. She loves you!" I laugh.
"What about you?" Leah questions.
"Me? Do I like kids?" I ask and raise my eyebrows. "Uhh, sure. They're alright..." I say, lying.
"Come on.."
"I guess I'm just not the baby type..." I laugh.
"You'd be a great mom." She tells me. I look down at my food and bite my lip, trying to pretend that her comment doesn't bother me.
"Eat, yeah? I'll take her." I say and grab Blake from Leah's arms. I watch Leah eat and then we pay and head back to the hospital.
Once we get there we receive good news. The doctor said Lydia, Leah's friend, is going to recover after some time. She'll be in the hospital for a few weeks at the least, but at least it's not worse.
After all of this is settled and everyone has taken their breath of relief Leah gives Asher his daughter and we are sent home for the day. Finally...
After we get to Leah's again, she looks at me and touches my thigh. "I'm sorry if what I said bothered you. I wasn't thinking about Danny." She tells me.
I nod my head, not in the mood for discussing the comment and get out of the car. We go into the house and sit down together, both tired as ever.
"Jennifer?" She mumbles my name and I
turn to look at her.
"Hm?"
"How do you feel about me?" She asks softly.3
I pause and look at her intently, several different things flashing through my head. "Something like this..." I whisper and kiss her tired lips slowly and softly.
18
During the midst of all of Leah's emotional things going on... I'm her distraction. I'm okay with being her distraction for the time being. You'll never hear me say that about anyone else though.
I pull back from Leah and she bites her lip and looks at me.
"Jennifer." She says and shakes her head.
"What?"
"I'm kinda crazy about you." She admits.
I raise my eyebrows and force myself to giggle, "no you aren't." I look away and she grabs my chin and kisses me deeply.
"I am. I want you." She assures me.
I realize how serious she's being and it hits me... I kinda want her too. I kiss her hard and she pulls my shirt off of me and continues showering me with some of the most passionate kisses I've ever experienced.
"I can't say I'm all that surprised."
Leah and I both jump and I grab my shirt from my lap and hold it to my chest. I look up and my heart sinks to my stomach. Danny.
"Danny, what are you doing here?!" Leah yells and stands up.
"I was dropping a check off. The better question is why is Jennifer half naked and making out with you?" He grits, unable to pull his eyes away from me.1
I swallow hard and stay totally silent. What could I say? I can't even look at him, much less speak.2
"Jennifer." He says my name and I look over to him, nervous.
"Stay away from her. She's bad news. She runs through more girls than you can count." Danny hisses and shakes his head before walking out, clearly angry. I'm left breathing heavy and highly embarrassed.
"I think it's time for me to go." I say and Leah runs to me and grabs my hands.
"No, no, no. Sit." She demands.
I sit down and she squats in between my legs and hold my hands tightly.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know he was going to be here..." she says. I nod and she takes a deep breath. "What Danny said isn't totally true."
"It's not totally false?" I ask, shocked. I hadn't thought twice about Danny's comments, but Leah's reaction to it has me worried now.
"I- Jennifer I want you to understand something. I feel things for you that I've never felt with anyone. You're not just another girl to me." She says, her voice soft and comforting.
"What is it?" I ask and pull my hands away.
She pauses and looks down. "I have a reputation I guess?" She mumbles.
"For?"
"For... playing girls, not treating them the best I guess." She says.
"So is that what this is? You're just taking me for a spin? It's my turn to get played now?" I question, jumping to conclusions a bit. I've already been hurt by her brother, I can't get hurt by her too.
"Jen, no-" I stand up and she grabs my wrist tightly. "Please do not walk away from me." She hisses.
I look at her and then at her hand. She releases my arm and I look at her, angry.
The room falls quiet and I pace back and forth, thinking. Leah's voice cuts the silence and grabs my attention. "I'm going to lay everything out for you." She take a breath, "before you came along, I slept with two of Danny's girlfriends while he was in the next room. When you came along I saw you and he knew I wanted to get at you, but he told me to back off because he saw some sort of future with you... mind you this was years ago. That's why I never met you. He asked me to stay away. When you two were on one of your breaks in the relationship, he went on a few dates with some girl. He said he really liked her and considered leaving you and going for her, but it didn't work out because I stole her from him. I've slept with a lot of girls I shouldn't have and I have done some incredibly stupid things in my life, Jennifer. I'm getting too grown to keep playing this game. I want something real and I want that with you. I don't care if he had you first and I don't care if it's awkward for people. I'm falling for you and I've been falling since the moment I met you at that party." Leah says. I take this and let it run through my head.2
Several minutes pass and I've kept quiet. Leah is now leaning against the back of the couch, looking down.
"Why'd you listen?" I ask her and she looks up at me with the saddest and most shame-filled eyes ever.
"What?"
"Why did you stay away from me? Why me when you didn't care with all those other girls he was with?"
"Danny loved you, Jen. He begged me not to take you away from him like I had done before. I could see how much he cared about you so I let you be. It sounds horrible when I say it like that... I'm not some cocky bitch with a big ego who thinks she can get who she wants. I was... at one point. But that was a long time ago." Leah explains. "I don't want to be that person anymore. I am tired of my friends getting engaged and married while I'm here by myself because of the reputation I made for myself. With you it was different! You didn't know that Leah. You know the Leah who only has eyes for you... that's the person I want you to see." She says.
I take a few breaths and feel tears building up. I fold my arms over my chest, bite my cheek, and look up at her. "Leah, you can't hurt me." I say, my voice cracking and a tear slipping.
"I have no intentions of doing that." She promises.
I wipe my cheek and walk closer to her and she wraps her arms around me. "Please, let me prove to you who I am." She whispers.
"I know who you are." I tell her and cup her face. I kiss her tenderly and she starts to smile.
"Does this mean we have a chance?" She asks, hopeful.+
"I guess it does..." I say back to her and hang my arms over her shoulders. She squeezes me tightly and kisses my neck a few times.
It is taking a lot for me to open up to her and trust her right now. Knowing her past, or even pieces of it... that's hard. I just keep telling myself she's a changed person. I don't feel like I'm in danger of being hurt around her. She can't still be that person! God, I hope she isn't.
19
Leah and I are back at my (sister's) apartment and I'm getting ready. I made her come all the way back here just so I could get ready... I'm that person.
"I don't know what to wear." I groan as I stand in front of my mirror in my bra and panties while Leah lays on my bed.
"Just... I don't know. Wear whatever." She says, being no help whatsoever.
I roll my eyes and she gets up and walks over behind me. I look at her through the mirror and she places her chin on my shoulder and her arms around my waist. "You'll look good no matter what... or you could take all of this off and..." she stops talking and kisses my shoulder and neck and her hand slides into the top of my panties.
"Mm- stop it." I say and lean my head back on her.
"Not even a quick one?" She whispers, teasing me.
I laugh and face her, "I just showered... I can't get all sweaty again. No." I say.
She rolls her eyes and kisses me again, "Fine. Wear jeans, they make your ass look phenomenal." She tells me before leaping back onto my perfectly made bed.
I listen to Leah's suggestion and slide into the tightest pair of jeans that I own and put on a white shirt that falls off of my shoulder to go with it. Once I'm completely ready, I look in the mirror and Leah grins at me. She walks over to me, gripping and squeezing my ass, "looks amazing." She grits through her teeth and kisses my jawline. I laugh and slap her arm playfully and we leave the apartment and head out to a restaurant.
After eating our dinner we start to leave the place and then I hear someone calling Leah's name. I grab her arm and she looks at me quickly.
"Oh, Corbin! Hi." She says and hugs the girl who was calling out to her.
"Jennifer this is Corbin, Corbin this is Jennifer." I smile and shake the girl's hand and Leah starts talking to her again. Leah is one of those people who always knows someone... no matter where we go. Maybe I just seem antisocial becaus
e I've been in the same relationship for so long. Danny and I never went out and made new friends.1
Leah turns to me and grabs my hand, "do you want to go? Or stay?" She asks me.
I shrug my shoulders, not wanting to tell her no. Leah pulls me closer and kisses my cheek, "one drink. Then I'll take you wherever you want to go." She says.
I follow her to a table and before I know it I'm surrounded by strangers. Leah's nearly done with her drink and to be honest I wish she'd hurry and finish it. I want to go home, I am not comfortable here.
"So are you two..?" Another girl at the table asks and I freeze and look to Leah.
"I- we- uh-" I stumble and stutter over my words and Leah raises her eyebrows and laughs a little.
"This is a new thing..." Leah says, eyeing me.
I force a shy smile and she touches my thigh underneath the table.
"How'd you two meet?" I freeze at the stranger's question.
I look at Leah and we are both thinking the same thing. I take what's left of Leah's drink and swallow it, eager to end this. "I think I should get home." I announce.
Leah seems confused at first, but she doesn't question me. "I'll catch up with you guys some other time. Be safe." She tells her friends as we walk away from the crowded table.
Leah and I go to the car and I get into the drivers seat and start the car. Before we go anywhere I let out a frustrated sigh and she picks up on it immediately.
"What's wrong?" I shake my head and start to drive.
"No, tell me. Did I do something?" She asks and puts the car back into park.
I look at her and shake my head. "Leah, how do we do this? This is so messed up and it's hard enough around your friends who don't know the story, I can't even imagine how shitty I'll feel around your family!" I say.
"Hey, look just calm down. It's okay." She says and I push my hair out of my face. "We don't have to tell people the story. That can be our thing. I know it sucks and the family part is going to be messy and complicated, but if it makes you happy then you shouldn't care what anyone else thinks." She says. She has a point.
