Rune hushed him. “Go get the baby bottle from the reservoir and bring it here.”
“Gerd?” Signe asked.
“Hemming,” Rune replied.
So that was the noise she heard. “Sit up?”
Leif returned with the baby bottle.
“You want to feed her?” Rune asked.
“Nei, but . . .” She heaved a sigh as he stuffed a pillow behind her neck and shoulders. “Tomorrow.”
She watched as he sat in the chair, the baby in his arm, and took the bottle from Leif. He moved like he had fed babies all his life. He learned quickly, that she knew. Mrs. Benson’s words echoed in her mind. “That Mr. Carlson is a good man.”
“The diapers?” she asked.
“Drying on the line Knute and I strung in the kitchen. He’s at the table doing his homework. Bjorn took the house axe down to sharpen, and Einar is in the machine shed too. He has been sleeping in the barn.”
Leif watched the baby eat. “Mor, we need a name for our baby. What about Kirstin, since we are in a new land?”
His suggestion caught her by surprise. None of their relatives were named such. Kirstin. She nodded. She heard the tap tap of Gerd’s cane.
“What do you think of Kirstin for our baby’s name?” Rune asked Gerd.
She shrugged as she set more hemmed diapers on the pile. “Ja, better than Baby.”
“Then Kirstin it is.”
Each day when Mrs. Engelbrett and Mrs. Benson arrived, they brought some food and cooked. They did the wash one day and baked bread another.
One day Mrs. Engelbrett brought a shawl. Signe watched as the young mother showed Gerd how to tie it to her with the baby snug inside. “See, she will stay warmer this way, and babies like to be held close.”
Gerd wore the shawl over to the bed to show Signe. “When you get strong again, you can carry her this way.” Gerd looked down at the baby with the closest thing to a smile Signe had ever seen on her face. Soon Signe would be able to carry her baby next to her heart again, but on the outside now. Lord, please make me stronger faster.
That night Rune sat beside her bed. “As long as the women come, I figure I could go back out and work with Einar. I know they do not stay all day, but Gerd is stronger, and I think she can manage for short periods of time. She can lift the baby now, and I saw her tie the baby in the shawl on her own.”
“I-I wish I could get up.”
“You will soon.” He laid his hand on her cheek. “Ah, Signe, I am so grateful you are still here. God was merciful as He promised.”
She nodded and leaned her face into the strength of his hand.
Even so, when he left the next morning, she felt her heart pick up speed and her chest tighten. What if the women did not come? The house was silent, as if waiting in either dread or anticipation. When she heard the jingle of the harness and the thud of hooves, she breathed a sigh of relief and instantly fell asleep.
The third day, Mrs. Benson greeted Signe with a letter from home. “I figured this might cheer you up.”
Signe took the letter with tears of joy bubbling to the surface. A letter from home. “Oh, I have not even told them the baby came.”
“I know. Let me get the ham and beans started, and then I will sit here and write what you tell me. You will have to spell most of the words. And it will probably be a short letter.”
“Would you do that—really?”
“Of course. You must eat something first and take a nap, and then we will write the letter. How about boiled eggs and toast?”
Signe nodded. Could she maybe feed herself, if someone helped her sit up against the pillows? How weak she still was—it did not seem possible.
Mrs. Benson helped her sit up, and Gerd, with the baby nestled in the shawl, sat beside the bed, ready to help her. After three bites, Signe dropped the spoon. “Oh,” she groaned and shut her eyes. It was too hard.
“No, you managed some on your own. That is good.” Gerd scooped the dropped egg off the towel they had draped over Signe and held it to her mouth. “Eat. Remember when you forced me to eat?”
Signe’s eyes flew open. She stared into Gerd’s. “You were furious with me.”
“Ja, I am sorry, but now it is you.” Gerd leaned forward with another spoonful. “Eat.”
The next morning at breakfast, Rune announced that he was going to Blackduck for lumber for building the stairs.
Einar slammed his hand on the table. “For three days you don’t work, and now you think to go to Blackduck instead. Nei!”
“I told you we are going to build stairs.” He leveled a look at Einar, wondering what had changed since his uncle had drawn that diagram in the machine shed. “I will be back in the woods tomorrow if all is well. Bjorn will be with you today.”
“Ja, Bjorn, he—”
“Is a good worker and doing the work as well as a man, even though he is still a boy. He could go with me instead.” Rune kept his voice even and finished the food on his plate. “I will drive you out to the woods and then go to Blackduck.”
“You—so you have it all decided? This is my house and I—”
“Hush, you will wake the baby.” Gerd’s voice penetrated her husband’s fury.
He stared at her, shoved his chair back, and strode from the room, grabbing his coat on the way past the coat-tree.
The silence was finally broken by a whimper from the sling.
“Finish your breakfast, boys. Bjorn, go help him harness up. You two get your dinner pails. Knute, is your horse ready?”
“Ja. Tied up outside.”
“Good. Gerd, do you need help with the baby?”
“Nei. I will warm the last bottle. You go. Do you have a list for the lumber? Add enough to make beds too.”
“Takk.” Rune pushed back his chair. “Make sure you bundle up, boys, it is cold out there.” He stopped in the bedroom to find Signe awake.
“I thought he might hit you,” she said.
“Nei. Thank God for Gerd. You should have seen his face.” He dropped a kiss on her forehead. “You are not to worry. Just keep getting stronger.”
“Ja. Oh, Rune, I want my milk to come in. You think it will?”
“If it does, wonderful. If it doesn’t, baby bottles work just fine. Is there something you want from the store in Blackduck? Say, a peppermint drop?”
“Ja, that would be good. But not necessary.”
“I am trying to think beyond necessary.”
He shrugged into his coat and tucked a scarf around his neck. Food baskets in hand, he went out the door and paused on the porch. The boys on the horse were nearly to the road. The wagon must be about ready. Lord, keep us all safe today and every day. And keep me from responding to Einar with anger, adding fuel to the fire.
Chapter
31
You stacked the lumber in the machine shed,” Einar said accusingly the next morning.
Rune nodded. “To keep it dry. I figured we can build the stairs the first day of heavy snow.”
“Snow don’t stop us cutting trees.”
“If all three of us work on the stairs, we should be able to finish in one day.” Rune kept eating his breakfast.
“I will not build stairs.” Einar’s glare could have nailed Rune to the wall.
“Then it will take Bjorn and me an extra day.”
“Bjorn works with me.”
In the bedroom, Kirstin worked her way into a full-fledged cry.
“Now see what you did.” Gerd’s glare nearly matched her husband’s. She left off packing the dinner basket, took the bottle she had heating on the top of the reservoir, and headed for the bedroom, shaking her head the whole while.
“The dinner basket is not ready. So we do not eat today?” Einar yelled after her. He jerked his hat with earflaps down on his head. Shrugging into his coat, he stormed out the door.
“He sure gets mad.” Knute looked at Rune. “Tante Gerd did too.” He shuddered. “I don’t want him to get mad at me.”
�
�Onkel Einar is mad at everybody.” Bjorn picked up his plate and that of Einar and set them in the dishpan on the stove. “Far, you want me to go help harness?”
“Ja, I will take care of the basket. Keep in mind, his bark is worse than his bite.” His boys all stared at him, uncertainty chasing doubt across their faces.
“He doesn’t like us.” Leif finished his cup of coffee that was really mostly milk plus a bit of sugar. He set his dishes in the dishpan too. “Hurry, Knute, or we’ll be late.”
Gerd returned to the kitchen. “Signe is feeding the baby, and I will finish the dinner basket. You are putting a horse blanket over it so it won’t freeze?”
“Takk, Gerd. Ja, we are. The ladies are coming again?”
“Ja. Good thing.”
“You are getting stronger every day. Something to be grateful for.”
“Ja, I never thought I would.” She looked toward the bedroom. “Thanks to Signe.” She paused, studying the knife in her hand. “I thought I’d never . . .” A puff of a sigh and a nod. She blew out a breath and went back to cutting the ham and cheese for sandwiches. “Einar . . . uff da, that man.”
That afternoon, Mrs. Benson came into the bedroom followed by Mrs. Engelbrett.
“I’m sorry, Signe, but I cannot be here tomorrow. Mrs. Engelbrett can’t either.”
Signe nodded. “I understand. You both have been such a great help.”
“We will manage.” Gerd’s head bobbed as she spoke. “Thank you.”
“If you want, I could take your baby home with me and nurse her there for another week or two,” Mrs. Engelbrett offered.
“I would have to talk with Rune, but I do not think so. She can drink cow’s milk if she must.” Lord, please, let me nurse my baby. “You have been a godsend.” She reached for the young mother’s hand. “Takk, tusen takk. I–I’m sorry, I have nothing to pay you with.”
“I couldn’t accept payment. Just knowing your baby is getting stronger and doing well is all I need. I love babies.” She ducked her head. “You see, I will be having another, and I’m not sure I should keep nursing. I know Kirstin will do well.”
“Your supper is in the oven, and I will take the butter we churned and apply it to your account, if you want.” Mrs. Benson leaned over to peek at the infant nestled in Signe’s arms.
“Ja, that would be good,” Gerd answered before Signe managed to.
“We will be off, then. I will return probably two days from now, I think. If you send a list with the boys, I will bring the stores when I come. If not Wednesday, soon after.” Mrs. Benson started for the door and turned. “By the way, Mrs. Jongkavn said that sometimes a mother’s milk will come in again after a while if the baby tries to nurse often. Let’s all pray that this will happen here.”
Signe heard the sounds of departure while studying the face of her infant daughter. She remembered when her boys were nursing, the baby would cry, and she would feel a rush of milk. One time they were in church, and someone else’s baby cried, and it was a good thing she’d had padding under her camisole. Please, Lord, bring this about. Her mother’s milk is so much better for her.
Gerd snorted. “Ach, I should have asked her to bring more yarn. I could be knitting mittens for the boys. Easier than using the rabbit skins right now.”
Signe hoped she was learning not to show her shock when Gerd said things like that. Thank you, Lord, for the miracles you have brought to us and Gerd. If only she could get up.
“From now on, when she starts to fuss, I will do as Mrs. Jongkavn said.”
“Ja, and I will go heat a bottle. We have enough milk here for two more feedings. Then cow’s milk it is. Do you know if Einar took the milk cow over to a bull?”
“I have no idea.”
“He never mentioned it. All he can think of is felling trees.”
“Is there a bull nearby?”
“Ja, about a mile away. The heifer will need to be bred too, but not for a couple of months.” Gerd paused. “Do your boys know how to watch for the signs?”
Signe shrugged. A yawn threatened to crack her jaw, and her eyelids closed without her volition.
“I will take her.” Gerd brought the shawl over, lifted the baby into it, and bent over to loop the tied ends over her head and shoulder. Kirstin made nary a whimper.
At least I get to feed her, even with a bottle. Signe pushed one of the pillows propping her off to the side and lay flat. Ja, she was getting stronger, but so terribly slowly. She should be able to get up and walk, but at least she could sit on the edge of the bed now. And hold her baby. And wear her in the shawl like Gerd was doing.
For the next few days, every time Kirstin started her quest for food, Signe held her to the breast, praying that this time her milk would be there, but the baby would spit out the nipple and root around for one that worked. Gerd would bring a warmed bottle, and Signe would feed her daughter. Gerd would change her, tuck her back in the shawl, and go about the kitchen chores, sitting down often but getting up again and cooking. She had the boys bring food up from the cellar when they came home from school and make sure the woodbox was always full.
Each evening after supper, Rune helped Signe stand and walk around the room. Each time she sank down on the bed and fell back exhausted. “Will I never get better again?”
“Of course you will. You are not hanging on to me so hard anymore. I’m not holding you up.”
Since they were nearly out of diapers, Gerd had the boiler on the stove, partly filled with water, when she had to sit down for the second time and catch her breath. They heard Mrs. Benson’s horse trotting up the lane. The weather had not gone above freezing for the last two weeks, so while there was still no snow, the ground had frozen deeper daily, and horse hooves and iron wheels made a racket.
“She has perfect timing,” Gerd muttered under her breath.
“I told you to wait until the boys came home from school.” Signe was sitting in the chair by the bed with Kirstin in the shawl around her shoulders. The chair was turned so she could see into the kitchen.
“I know, but there is never enough time then. Can you see me hanging diapers on the clothesline in the dark?”
“You are not hanging up the diapers outside. Knute and Leif can do that, after they crank the washing machine.”
Mrs. Benson knocked on the back door and entered when Gerd yelled, “Come in!”
“My goodness, what do we have here?” Mrs. Benson looked at Gerd. “You were going to wash diapers?” When Gerd nodded, the storekeeper tsked. “More strength to you.”
“Bit by bit I can do about anything. Just do not expect me to hurry.”
Mrs. Benson hung up her coat and scarf. “I’ll finish filling that boiler and add the dirty diapers. I brought you some more flannel for diapers and the yarn you requested. Can’t have too many diapers in a Minnesota winter. Have you strung a clothesline on the porch? We did that a long time ago when the snow was too deep to get to the clothesline.”
“Not yet. Good idea. We’ll see if we have enough rope left after stringing one in here.”
“I brought some apple cake. I thought we could have that with coffee. How about I make another one here for the whole family for supper? I know you have smoked pork—did they smoke the loin too?”
“Have canned down in the cellar.”
“Good, then I shall make a pork potpie. You have a good supply of vegetables in the cellar.”
“Signe did all that.”
“Gerd, she’s awake,” called Signe, sorry to interrupt the conversation.
“Be right there, soon as I put the bottle on.”
Gerd kicked the rug back in place when she shut the pantry door, to help keep the draft down. She set the bottle in the bowl to warm. By now they could all hear Kirstin’s imperious demand for food.
“She is not a patient baby,” Signe said apologetically. “When she wakes up, she wants to eat now, not later.”
Mrs. Benson smiled. “Some babies are like that. I will change her wh
ile the milk heats. Mrs. Engelbrett sends her greetings. Her milk dried up quickly when she quit coming here.” She entered the bedroom. “And how is our Kirstin today?”
“She was good until . . .” Signe sighed. “I did not get her to the breast soon enough, and there was nothing there for her. Do you think babies get angry?”
“I sure do. They are happy or content or restless, and right now she is telling us in no uncertain terms that she is hungry.”
Gerd tapped her way in with the warmed bottle in hand. “Here, cranky one.”
Signe put the nipple in her daughter’s mouth, and Kirstin set to draining her meal as fast as she could suck. After a few swallows, she slowed down, her gaze always on her mor’s face. Signe smiled down at her. “See, that was not so bad.” She looked up at the two women, both smiling down at the baby.
Gerd was smiling. She was actually smiling. Signe felt warm all over. Tante Gerd had smiled. And you, little one, brought it on.
Two days later, Gerd had Kirstin in the shawl sling while she worked in the kitchen when the baby started to fuss and whimper. “You have to wait until I get my hands free,” Gerd groused.
Kirstin gained volume.
“Gerd, Gerd, bring her here,” Signe called excitedly.
“Coming. Got to get the bottle on.”
“Nei, come now. Look. I felt a rush and now I am soaked. Give her to me quick.” Signe cuddled her baby against her chest, and within seconds Kirstin located the milk-soaked breast and started sucking. “I really have milk. Thank you, Lord. Gerd, I have been praying and praying my milk would come back for her.” She glanced up to see a look of astonishment on Gerd’s face.
“I cannot believe this, but I am seeing it with my own eyes. I have to believe.”
Signe felt the baby pull away. The grunting and mewing started again but turned to sucking as soon as she was moved to the other nipple. “Look at her,” Signe said a bit later. “She should sleep with a full tummy.”
The snow started during the night, and several inches had fallen by morning. By the time the men returned from doing chores, it was piling up. Rune looked thoughtfully out the kitchen window.
The Promise of Dawn Page 28
