by Wagner, Raye
Relief ran through her followed by excitement. “Is he here, too?”
Xan’s gaze again went to the peach trees. “He’s here, but . . .”
Oh no. No. No. No. “He didn’t . . . He’s still . . .”
Xan closed his eyes and ran his hand through his hair. “Listen. Yes. He’s okay. He’s fine. It’s just that—”
“Where is he?” Her worry and fear cycled, creating a rapidly building cyclone of emotions. “Where?”
Xan shook his head. “He’s got something he has to take care of first, Hope. He’ll come join us.”
Did Xan not understand this was the Underworld? There were still Skia here. Vengeful gods. Hades was allegedly looking for her for his own nefarious plans. They needed to get Athan and get out.
“Where?” She grabbed Xan’s shirt. “Please, tell me where.”
“In the orchard. I’ll take you—”
But she didn’t wait for him to finish. She couldn’t. She had to see Athan. See that he was okay. Tell him about what she’d found out. She wanted to kiss him and tell him they had a chance.
She could hear Xan behind her yelling for her to stop, and he was sure to catch up with her soon.
Hope jumped over the wall, the smell of ripe peaches hanging in the heavy air. The bubbling of the Lethe was beyond the perimeter wall. She turned the corner and practically tripped over her feet in an attempt to stop.
Athan was kissing someone. He was . . . He held her face in his hands, and he was kissing her. He was hugging her. They were so close.
Hope closed her eyes and turned away, but the image was burned into her brain. Tears stung and seeped through her eyelids.
“Hope,” Xan whispered. “Come on.”
He guided her away from the orchard, toward the back of the garden. And then his glances at the orchard made sense.
Her eyes flew open, and she glared at him. “You knew.”
He shook his head. “I would’ve never willingly let you see that. That’s . . . That be all arseways.”
“Who is she?”
Xan raised his eyebrows. “You sure you want to know?”
She nodded but then shook her head. “Does he love her?”
Xan blew out a long breath. “I don’t know.” His long fingers went through his hair again. “He used to.”
The knot in her stomach wouldn’t go away until she knew. At least if she knew, she could deal with it. She thought of the bricks that had once protected her heart. Athan had torn the wall down. He’d told her he’d meant all the kisses, all the endearment. She could deal with his past. “Tell me.”
“Athan came to the conservatory shortly after his mother died. He was maybe eight or ten.” He paused and tilted his head as if he were thinking. With a small shake he said, “Anyway, he was young. He was a nice kid, really sweet. He helped out a lot. Everyone liked him.”
Xan took a deep breath and slowly let it out through pursed lips. He cleared his throat.
Hope waited for him to continue, fidgeting on her feet as if on the edge of a precipice she was supposed to jump from. The silence stretched, and she wanted to yell at him to continue, to get it out already, but a part of her wanted to run away from what she feared was coming.
He ran his fingers through his hair and offered Hope a small smile. “I found Isa a few years later. Her father had died, and her mother is Aphrodite. Even when she was young, Isa was something to look at, but there is something almost compellingly attractive about Aphrodite’s daughters. They are like a magnet for men, and Isa was no different.”
The knot unfurled tentacles of dread in her stomach.
Xan shook his head. “But it was like Athan didn’t notice. He was friendly with her, nice to her, but he treated her like a friend. I’m sure that’s what attracted her to him. They were friends for a couple of years. They would play board games and pull silly pranks like short-sheet all the beds or put plastic wrap on the toilet seats. Totally immature, but they laughed all the time.”
Hope could see it. A young Athan and the beautiful Isa laughing, hugging . . . The scene of them kissing played through her mind, and her stomach churned.
“I was away when their relationship changed. There were reports of a demigod in Ireland, and Dahlia and I went to check it out.” He shook his head again, and his fingers threaded through his hair, making the ends stand up. “Skia were popping up everywhere, and we struggled to get to demigods in time. When Dahlia and I weren’t out on a search, we were training the demigods in the conservatories to defend themselves. No excuses, but I was really busy. All. The. Time.”
She could feel the story unraveling, and she knew the drop was coming.
“Athan was off with his dad when I got to the conservatory. Sometimes the two of them would disappear for weeks at a time. Isa and I were friends. She wanted to go out, but I was piss-drunk. We’d lost another demigod, and he looked a lot like Roan. Dahlia had disappeared, and it was just me and Isa . . .”
Hope felt like she’d been sucker punched. “You slept with Athan’s girlfriend?”
“I woke up, and we were in bed together. I was still dressed, but she said . . .” He took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. “She said we did.”
It was like grasping at straws as they slid through her fingers. She wanted, somehow, for it not to be true. “But you don’t remember?”
He closed his eyes and dropped his head. “I don’t remember. She told Athan when he got back a couple weeks later. I wasn’t sure what had happened, and I tried to tell him that, but he wouldn’t hear it. He forgave her, said I’d taken advantage of their friendship. I tried to tell him . . .” He gritted his teeth. “It would’ve been better if I’d just left for good, but I didn’t want to leave Dahlia. She’s funny about Seattle. She was . . .”
His emotion rolled off him, pain for his cousin and all that she’d suffered. Hope reached for him, but he stopped her.
He ran his hand down her arm, and squeezing her hand, he said, “Let me finish, or I’ll never get it out.”
“Okay.” Hope clasped her hands behind her back.
“Isa seemed to thrive on the contention she caused. Remember how Marilyn Monroe was? Aphrodite’s daughters all have a similar temperament. I don’t even know if Athan was aware of how she was behaving. He was in love with her, and she could do no wrong.
“He told me to stay away from her. And I tried. I stopped drinking at the conservatory. I spent more time with Dahl, Dion, and his brother Demitri. We’d lost several demigods over the years, and the Skia were picking off more and more of our numbers. Demitri and I were good friends. My best friend died shortly after Athan got here. Athan and I were tight . . . and then we weren’t. Demitri was cool, not like Athan or Luc—”
“So what happened?”
“Demitri died. Skia got him. I . . . I got slammed. I couldn’t deal. Then Athan was gone, off with his dad again. And Isa begged me to take her out. She promised to behave. That she wouldn’t hit on me again. She left me alone that night. But there were others she . . .” He shook his head, refusing to detail whatever had happened with Isa. “On the way home, we got ambushed. Skia came at us from all—”
Hope held up her hand. “Stop. Please. That’s enough.”
She couldn’t listen anymore. She’d told Priska she wasn’t sure Athan was the one, and maybe he wasn’t. But her heart didn’t believe what she now knew was a lie. Every single good thing had been taken away. Her mom and dad, Priska, Athan . . . Her heart couldn’t take it.
She could hear the river spilling over the rocks below. She just needed to get away for a minute. She stepped back, but he grabbed her wrist.
“Don’t run off, Hope.”
“Please.” She wanted to scream at Xan. That somehow it was his fault he’d let her see the kiss. It was like a movie on constant replay. How Athan cupped the girl’s face and bent over her to brush her lips, and to know how much he’d loved her— “I need a minute.”
This time she didn’t
wait for a reply, and it appeared that Xan was smart enough to know she wasn’t asking for permission.
“I’ll be right here,” he yelled after her.
Athan’s heart faltered when he saw Hades’s guard dog. Cerberus wasn’t the size of a dog. He wasn’t even the size of a horse. The three-headed beast stood as tall as an elephant, his thick heads each looking in a different direction. Any one of those heads could bite Athan in two.
By the gods, he hoped Isa was right. He whistled and all three heads turned to survey him. The animal took two steps before Athan barked out the first command. “Sit.”
The ground shook as the huge beast parked its butt.
“Stay.” Athan held his hand just as Isabel had shown.
All three heads swiveled to watch him cross the threshold of the lord of the Underworld’s castle. Athan held his breath until he was inside the dark walls.
The air felt different. Charged energy tingled about him. To the left he could hear a deep voice yelling, but the words were muffled. As he followed the din, he hoped this time his audience with Hades would prove more fruitful, because he needed the god’s help to find Hope.
With a deep breath, Athan pulled open one of the heavy doors to the throne room.
Hades, dressed in black, paced the floor, his frustration pulsing with every move.
On the steps of the dais, watching her husband, sat Persephone. The goddess of spring and handmaid to the lord of the Underworld twisted her hands in worry. Her wheat-colored hair was pulled back in a loose braid that hung over her shoulder almost to her waist. Her peaches-and-cream complexion was marred by the worry twisting her features. The front of her dress was grass-stained and dirty, and by the look of her hands, she’d been interrupted from her gardening.
“But you’re sure she is here?” Persephone asked. The words hung in the air as she met Athan’s gaze.
Hades turned to see what had caused his wife’s shock.
“You. Again?” Hades crossed the room and grabbed Athan by the shirt.
“Stop!” Persephone yelled as she ran toward them. “What’s wrong with you?”
She batted her husband’s hands away from Athan and smoothed his shirt. “Welcome to the Underworld, Son of Hermes.”
“Thank you, Lady.” Athan bowed.
Hades stepped back and looked at his wife, his voice flat when he stated, “He killed Darren.”
Persephone waved the words away. “I never liked Darren.”
Athan’s esteem for the goddess went up significantly.
“Why are you here?” Hades demanded with a glare. The air around him sizzled with his power.
Xan burst into the room. “What the hell are you thinking?” he asked, glaring at Athan. Xan froze as all eyes turned to him, and then he dropped to one knee. “Lord Hades, Lady Persephone.”
“Both of you are still alive?” Hades no longer seemed angry, but rather impressed as he looked back and forth between the two of them. “I’ve never had demigods escape Tartarus . . .” His eyes stopped on Xan’s belt. “Are those Moirai shears?” He took one step forward. “Where did you get those?”
Xan shifted, his hand covering the white handles. “Atropos gave them to me.”
Silence, much like reverence, descended upon the room.
“The Fates are involved,” Persephone breathed. Her face lit from within. She turned to Xan. “What do you need, Son of Ares?”
“Ah, I think you might want to send someone out to tend Cerberus. I was in a hurry to get through when I saw Athan. Sorry.” Xan pinched his lips.
Hades frowned. “Did you kill my guard-dog?”
“No. Just incapacitated. The wound should heal right up, if it’s tended to.” Xan shifted his gaze and glared at Athan. “You’re an arse.”
Athan grimaced. There was a lot of truth behind that statement. “What did I do this time?”
Xan looked around the room as if searching for someone. “Wait. Where’s Hope? Haven’t you found her yet? She disappeared—”
Athan’s heart stopped. “Have you seen her?”
Xan paled. “Aye. Have you not seen her yet?”
When Athan shook his head, Xan swore.
“Who’s Hope?” Persephone asked.
Xan pointed at Hades. “The Sphinx.” Xan pulled the scissors from his belt and pricked his finger. Bright red blood welled on the tip. “Thanatos has been keeping her away from you so you couldn’t use her as a tool. At least that’s what he told her.”
Hades looked like he’d been slapped.
Xan turned to Athan. “I came across her shortly after leaving you and Isa . . . doing whatever.” Xan grimaced. “We talked for a bit, but then she demanded to see you.” His grimace turned to a glare.
Oh gods. Had Hope seen him kissing Isa? “It wasn’t like that—”
“I don’t care how it was.”
“Stop!” Hades’s command was filled with his power. “You will stop, now.”
Athan said nothing, but his mind churned with what Xan had told him. Hope had seen Athan and Isa. Together. Kissing .
Persephone crossed the room and wiped the blood from Xan’s finger with her sleeve. “You knew what you carried?” She indicated the scissors.
“Aye. I’m the son of Ares. I know a bit about all weapons.” He raised his eyebrows at the goddess. “Even those of the gods.”
She nodded.
Athan had never heard of such a thing. And Xan had deliberately cut himself with the scissors . . . Oh, shears of the Moirai. If pricked by the scissors, god or mortal wouldn’t be able to speak false. “I thought you couldn’t lie in the Underworld?”
Hades regarded Athan a moment before answering. “The dead cannot lie. There is no reason to hide from what is or what was.”
But Hermes had lied.
“What happened?” Athan asked.
Xan explained it all. His meeting with Hope, what little she’d said about her parents, something about the curse and going to Olympus, and her excitement to see Athan. She’d all but demanded that Xan take her to Athan. He’d taken as long as he could to get there, wanting to give Athan and Isa time to say goodbye. But they’d shown up just as Athan kissed Isa. Hope ran off, and Xan had followed. Until the god of death appeared. Hope had been standing by the river with Thanatos, one minute there, the next gone. “I was hoping, somehow, that you’d come across her.”
Hades’s jaw tightened when Xan mentioned the other god of the Underworld, and the king’s eyes barely contained the fury boiling within. “You are quite sure it was Thanatos?”
Xan held up the shears. “Do you want me to bleed again to prove it?”
Persephone pushed the hand holding the sharp tool down, and Xan slid the scissors back into the leather sheath.
“Hope called him Thanatos. That’s all I know.”
Hades narrowed his eyes, and it was as if fire blazed within the dark god.
Hope slipped through the open gate. She’d used up all her tears, but her chest felt hollow as she descended the stairs to the river Lethe. The cheerful splashes mocked her, and she looked for a rock to toss into the crystal waters.
How dare Athan? But that wasn’t even a fair question. He’d loved Isa once; that much was clear. And was it so wrong to eventually move on? Was that what Hope was, his moving on? The idea made her chest tighten. And was it wrong that she still wanted him? Oh gods, what if he decided to stay in the Underworld with Isa?
Hope had said she’d get over it. She’d told Priska that Athan wasn’t anything special, but that wasn’t true. There was no one out there quite like him. He’d been so patient, and when they dated, he’d been so courteous. He’d risked his life to fight for her, and even come to the Underworld for her . . . or had that been for Isabel?
“Here you are,” Thanatos said with a relieved smile. He stood on the other side of the river, extending his hand toward her. “I was worried for you.”
The god of death disappeared and reappeared next to where Hope stood staring out at t
he water.
“Thanatos.” She pushed the palms of her hands into her eyes, as if she could push down her emotions. “Are you going to tell me everything happens for a reason? Or it will all work out for the best?” She looked up at him, and the tears she’d been holding back refused to be dammed.
Thanatos scowled, his pallid skin even more pale in the bright light of the Isles of the Blessed. His dark eyes flashed with a strength held in check. “I wouldn’t pretend to patronize you.”
She wrapped her arms around her torso as if she would be able to hold together her breaking heart.
“He hurt you very much,” the god said, glaring up the hillside. “Come.”
He touched her, and suddenly, while still on the banks of the Lethe, Hope could no longer see the gate that led up to Persephone’s gardens.
Not that Hope wanted to go back there now. If she had waited with Xan, maybe she wouldn’t have seen that. This hurt so much more than when she found out about Obelia, even more than thinking he was just playing her. Why did she hurt so much? She couldn’t even answer. If she opened her mouth, she would start sobbing.
“He’s a fool. And definitely doesn’t deserve you.”
The words should have felt a kindness, but the thoughts they invoked continued to shred her heart. It didn’t matter that he didn’t want her. She still loved him. She loved him, and it hadn’t been enough.
Thanatos pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her. “I hate to see you mourn so. You are pure, dedicated, and so, so determined. Anyone who cannot see your radiance is an idiot.”
He whispered soothing words, and his hands rested on her back.
She’d thought she had no more tears, but somehow her eyes found a way to pour out more and more. She soaked through his dark shirt but had to pull away. She’d never been this close to Thanatos before, and he smelled of death.
The rational part of her brain told her of course he did, and it shouldn’t matter. But it did. He smelled of overripe decay, antiseptic, the copper scent of blood, and the pus rank of infection. He was the god that ripped the soul from her mother’s body.
