by Maisey Yates
And that was when the emotion broke inside her, and Jamie felt tears streaming down her face again. She threw her arms around him and held him close. Because whatever he said next, it was what she wanted to do. And she wasn’t scared. She was strong enough to handle whatever came next.
“I love you,” he whispered. “I love you. And I’m going to cheer you on when you barrel race, and travel to every damn one of your events that I can make it to. I want to build a life with you. I want to marry you. I want you to live with me. And, Jamie, I’m going to choose to be the best damn husband ever. I’m going to choose you, and only you, every day for the rest of my life.”
The rush of love, of relief, of pleasure, that washed over her was so intense she thought she might faint. And wouldn’t that be a thing. Jamie Dodge literally swooning over a man.
But this was the right thing to swoon over, if she was going to.
Her life.
Her love.
Her man.
“Okay,” she whispered. “I choose you, too.”
“People like us, people with so much protection, we don’t fall in love. Honey, we have to hold hands and jump in. We have to do it on purpose. Because there’s too many barriers in the way for it to happen on accident. And I am so damn glad you chose me. Because it gave me the strength to choose you back.”
“Gabe, so many things in this world are outside of my control. That you would choose me, that you would take one of those few things that you can choose, and make it me... That’s the most powerful, wonderful thing I can even think of.”
“So do you love me?” Gabe asked.
“Yes.” She flung her arms around him again. “Yes, I do.”
“Will you marry me, and travel all over and become a barrel racing champion, and come back home to me when it’s time?”
“Yes,” she said, through tears that she wasn’t afraid to let fall.
“Will you eat toast with me and drink hot chocolate?”
“If we don’t have it at our wedding I’ll start a riot.”
“Perfect. I can’t wait.”
“Me, either,” Jamie said.
“Are you going to wear jeans to the wedding?” he asked.
“Hell, no!” she said. “I’m going to be a princess. I’m going to get the biggest, fanciest wedding dress you’ve ever seen, and I’m going to wear it. Because I don’t need to put on armor every day anymore. And I don’t need to pretend that I’m one of the Dodge boys. I don’t need to try to keep the town from thinking I’m poor, sad Jamie Dodge. I can just be me.”
She kissed him, and she never wanted the moment to end.
Because right then, Jamie Dodge felt all the pieces of herself join up together. Completed by this man. And she was whole.
They were whole.
Together.
Jamie Dodge had always taken care of herself. When she’d fallen down, she hadn’t cried. Not even once. She stood up, wiped the blood off and moved on.
But she wouldn’t have to do that anymore.
Because in Gabe’s arms, she found a safe space to cry.
Now when she fell down, he would be there to pick her up.
And that made her feel strong.
* * *
Read on for a riveting excerpt of New York Times bestselling author
Maisey Yates’s new release,
Lone Wolf Cowboy,
the next installment in her Gold Valley series!
As a cowboy, former EMT and a wildland firefighter, there’s nothing Jacob Dalton can’t fix. Except his own emotional demons. Since his best friend’s tragic death, Jacob has isolated himself from his family, with only his guilt for company. Then Vanessa Logan returns to Gold Valley. He saved her life during a medical call years ago, and he’s never forgotten her. Now she’s back in town and working on the Dalton family ranch. But Vanessa’s past is as troubled as his own and he knows that giving in to the heat between them could only end in disaster...
For Vanessa, returning home was about healing, not about exploring her attraction with this strong, silent cowboy. Jacob is the guardian angel from her past—with strong, capable hands, and an irresistible mouth. He’s a temptation she knows she can’t afford. But after the chemistry between them explodes, she must tell Jacob he’s not alone anymore—she’s pregnant with his baby.
Read on to get a glimpse of
Lone Wolf Cowboy.
Lone Wolf Cowboy
by Maisey Yates
CHAPTER ONE
VANESSA LOGAN HAD been avoiding going home again for a very long time.
And for most of that time, she had been convinced that no one was terribly sad about her absence. It had been seven years since she’d seen her family by the time she’d come back to town about two years earlier for her sister Olivia’s wedding.
She’d been in a haze then—not a drug haze—which she imagined is what her family would have assumed, but just a kind of strange, surreal sensation, returning to a place that she hadn’t been to in so long.
It was different this time.
Different now two years later as she drove past the welcome sign all done up in blue and cheery yellow, welcoming her to the town of Gold Valley.
Back to the county that bore her last name, where she had been born, raised and let everyone down who had ever loved her.
She was closing the loop. That’s why she was back. Anyway, there was an opportunity here, and she figured she might as well take it. Olivia had a baby. Olivia had a family, and no matter what had happened between them in the past, Olivia was her twin. It seemed...it seemed like she should be closer to her.
Geographically, and emotionally. Though she knew it would all have to be done in stages.
She imagined her parents would want her near eventually. Maybe. She couldn’t say for sure. She wouldn’t particularly blame them, she supposed, if they couldn’t get over it.
She had been difficult. She’d caused them worry. They had assumed the worst about her...and in many ways they’d been right to. At least, at the time.
Her childhood had been ideal for a while. Before she’d wanted to be anything other than Olivia’s twin, and Cole and Tamara Logan’s daughter. Before she ever got curious about the forbidden things her parents had warned her so sternly about.
She ached for that sometimes. For those simple days. When a hug from her father had healed all wounds. When she’d gone for long lunches with her mom after shopping in town.
When she and Olivia had whispered secrets under the covers. Until Olivia had gotten scared of secrets, and Vanessa’s had gotten too dark to share.
She might never get back to those times. It might all be too broken. But even if it was...even if it was, she was still glad she was here.
She was back for her.
Gold Valley was the last refuge for her demons, and the final locked door in her life.
It was her origin story. And everyone needed to revisit an origin story.
She’d gone out on her own, failed, hit rock bottom and healed. But she had healed away, not at the site of her very first fall from grace.
And it was time.
It was just time.
She maneuvered her car through Main Street, marveling at the brick buildings, the faded advertisements painted on the side, the lone neon sign above Gold Valley Saloon—allowed only because it had been installed in the early sixties and was considered historic.
Any new neon would not be considered historic.
And the fact that Vanessa still knew those things—could still hear her father explaining them and that cool, authoritative voice of his that Vanessa could’ve listened to forever—made her smile.
Though, it wasn’t an entirely happy smile.
Home was complicated.
That was for sure.
Well, home wo
uld be a little less complicated now than it had been, maybe. She had her own place, and the keys were waiting for her. All of her possessions fit in the back of her car, and she was ready to start a new job in a couple of days.
She had things lined up. She was responsible now.
Had been for a number of years.
And she’d been too cowardly to get in touch with her family and let them know that she was doing better.
So, maybe she wasn’t totally responsible.
She tried not to dwell on that as the road carried her through the main part of town, and back out again, out into a densely wooded stretch of highway, with long, direct, gravel driveways.
One of those long gravel driveways would be hers.
Well, hers and a couple of other people’s. There were typically several homes back up one of those roads.
Her car’s navigation system buzzed and let her know that she was in fact at her road. She turned left and started to look for numbers. Every few trees, there was a sign posted and Vanessa kept watch for the four-digit number that marked her new home.
She would have hated this when she was a teenager.
She’d hated where she lived already, and a road like this—that took her out farther away from the nearest larger town, that was several miles out of Gold Valley, and over all this dirt and gravel—would have mortally wounded and offended her.
Thinking of that girl, with her bright, big ambition, her seeds of dissatisfaction and her deep certainty she knew better than everyone else around her...
It was almost painful.
She’d had no idea what she was going to walk herself into.
And she supposed that was another reason she’d had to come here.
It was the last place she’d been that Vanessa.
It was also where she’d changed. Completely and utterly.
She saw the number for her rental, nailed to a tree. She turned her car onto a much narrower gravel road than the one she’d just been on.
The house at the end of the drive was small, humble, with white siding that was peeling in places, a shingled roof and a covered porch with a few hanging flowerpots.
She wondered if Ellie Bell, her contact in Gold Valley was responsible for the flowers.
She doubted it was the landlord’s work, given the state of the paint.
Rustic was a generous description. Both for the landscape, and the house itself.
She got out and looked around, the pine trees that towered overhead seeming to swallow her whole as she stood there, feeling increasingly smaller. As if her place in the universe had shrunk significantly.
She didn’t mind the feeling. She grabbed her shoulder bag from the car and began to walk up the porch steps, one of the pieces of wood creaking beneath her feet.
It was such a lovely little place and would make a welcome change to the apartment she’d called home for the past few years. Quiet. Isolation.
Well, except for all the teenagers she would be working with.
That wouldn’t be very quiet.
She was okay with that too.
Teenagers shouldn’t have to be quiet. They should get to live as loudly as they could, in safe spaces where they wouldn’t be punished for trying and failing.
Of course they needed boundaries too. She did know that.
It was just boundaries had been suffocating for her, and sometimes it was tough to remember that others suffered from a lack of them.
She heard the sound of tires on gravel, and she turned just in time to see a mint-green SUV headed up the roadway.
She frowned.
There was a blonde woman in the car, looking harried. She parked behind Vanessa’s car and got out.
“Hi,” Vanessa said hesitantly.
“Vanessa?” the woman asked. She moved to the back of the car and opened the door. A little blonde girl hopped out, her hair bouncing with each movement.
The tiny child gave Vanessa a momentary feeling of discomfort.
“I’m Ellie,” she said, walking forward and extending her hand.
“Oh,” Vanessa said. “It’s nice to meet you.”
“I’m Amelia!” The little girl spun in a circle as she announced her name.
“Hi, Amelia,” Vanessa said, not sure what to do with her hands.
“I didn’t make it up here earlier to put the key out for you,” Ellie said. “I’m really sorry. I was hoping to beat you here, but I had drama with Amelia’s sitter. It’s just been a day. Plus, everything at the ranch is a little bit nutty right now.”
“I’d guess so, with you just getting everything up and running.”
The whole endeavor sounded great to Vanessa. An alternative school for kids who were either having trouble in school, or at home. Or in the system. Kids who were at their last stop, basically.
As a kid who’d been there, Vanessa wished there had been something like that for her. Of course...she doubted her parents would have ever been able to admit she needed help.
That was if she’d ever been able to admit to them that she did.
“It should be. Now that we’re getting all the bugs worked out. And just in time to get started. We’re going to have about twenty students, most of whom are from out of the area and will be living with foster families in town.”
“That... That seems like a good size.”
“Yes. Well, I was really impressed with your work. Not just your art, but your explanation of how you’ve used art for therapy.”
“It’s something that I...that I really believe in.” It had saved her. Finding a passion. She wondered what her parents would think of it now.
They would have disapproved if she’d said she wanted to be an artist back when she was in high school. But maybe they’d think trading in pills for paintbrushes was an all right idea.
“Okay,” Ellie said, “I don’t want to clutter up your day. I’m sure that you want to get settled. But, if you need anything, feel free to give me a call. And if you have an emergency, Jacob is just up the drive. Jacob Dalton, I mean.”
Vanessa’s heart twisted. “Jacob Dalton?”
She could see that name, clear in her mind, on a name badge. His hand strong, firm. His expression full of concern.
Stay with me...
She blinked. “I...”
“Do you know Jacob?” Ellie asked.
“No,” she said. It was the honest truth. She didn’t know Jacob. Not really. “I know his name. You know how things are in a small town.”
“Definitely,” Ellie said. “He’s home unless he’s out fighting fires. Though, the serious part of the season is mostly winding to a close. I don’t... I don’t like it when he and Caleb are out on fires.”
“Yeah, that sounds like an intense job,” Vanessa said, struggling to keep her mind in the present, when half of it was still lost back in the past.
“Yeah,” Ellie said. “And it’s just...my husband... Amelia’s father...” They both looked over at the little girl, who was turning circles just next to the porch. “He died. He died out on a fire. The helicopter he was in crashed.”
That brought Vanessa right into the moment. What an awful thing to have to go through. She couldn’t even imagine.
She might not know that kind of pain, but she knew what it was like to be an oddity. To be someone with a wound other people had a hard time understanding. And if Ellie wanted to open up, to share her pain...well Vanessa was here to listen.
She knew what it was to be isolated that way.
“I’m sorry,” Vanessa said.
She meant it. She’d lost a lot of people in her life. But not to death. By her own systematic alienation of them. And in some cases, by them cutting ties with her. But those losses had other chances available, no matter how unlikely.
A loss like Ellie’s didn’t have another
chance.
“Me too,” Ellie said. “He would’ve been a good dad.”
And Vanessa probably would have been a terrible mother. But she was here. She lost her pregnancy. And this little girl was here without a good father. Because the world was strange, and it was nothing if not horrifically imbalanced.
“I really am sorry about that.”
“I appreciate it. It’s been a while. But, that is the thing. Jacob and Caleb being out on fires... It always makes me think of Clint. Of course, so does Amelia’s smile. But, that’s a happy thing.”
“Does she like to paint?” Vanessa asked.
“Oh, she hasn’t really done much of it. I mean, besides at preschool.”
“I’d love to do some painting with her,” Vanessa said. She wasn’t quite sure why she offered, particularly given her initial reaction to the child. But, if she could do art, and help Amelia express herself, then she felt like that was a bonus. Anyway, it gave her a place to focus some of the rattling nerves that were jittering around inside of her.
Jacob Dalton.
Well, so much for her particular setup being less complicated.
Not that he would remember her. There was no reason for him to remember her. She would just be one of the many phone calls he’d had during his time as an EMT in Logan County.
“All right, Amelia,” Ellie said. “Say goodbye to Ms. Logan.”
“Bye, Ms. Logan,” Amelia said, her smile cherubic and sweet. Ellie waved and headed back to the car. As Ellie got inside, Vanessa had to wonder what the other woman knew about her, and what she didn’t.
Vanessa’s fall from grace was something she imagined people in town discussed. Or maybe they didn’t. Maybe her parents had done a good job of hiding the activities of their daughter for the past nine years.
Surely, the label of rebellious had been given to her before she’d left town. That, she actually knew for a fact.
