If I had only known what I know now, I would have paid for this house in full when I had the money. I never saw this coming.
Harry and Ida weren’t doing any better at the restaurant. Finally, by the summer of 1970, there was no more money left in either Harry’s or Dovid’s savings accounts. The two couples got together at Dovid’s house to talk things over.
“I’m not ready to give up on the restaurant,” Ida said.
“The restaurant is just making its own bills,” Harry said. “We are going to have to put the house up for sale.”
“Yes, we are as well,” Eidel said. “I talked to a real estate agent last week.”
“You never told me,” Dovid said.
“I know. I didn’t want it to come to this. But I think we are going to have to sell, Dovi.”
Dovid nodded.
Eidel took care of everything with the realtor. But when Dovid saw the “For Sale” sign outside his house, he felt sick to his stomach. Even worse, he hadn’t been able to find any odd jobs for a while and because of it he had no money to buy food. The children were hungry. Mark was eight, Abby seven, and Haley turning six. They were too young to understand their parents’ problems. Dovid chastised himself as he watched them suffering for his stupid mistake. Mark and Abby were embarrassed to go to school wearing used clothes. They complained to their parents and cried about not fitting in. They wanted penny loafers like the other kids but Dovid could not buy them the shoes everyone else had and he felt even more like a failure. The children took peanut butter sandwiches to school for lunch each day, and somehow Dovid managed to be sure that he was able to provide at least that much. Many nights, Dovid said he wasn’t hungry and he didn’t eat in order to make sure that there was enough for the children and Eidel. Eidel, too, secretly saved her portion for the children. When Dovid looked at his kids he felt that they looked unhealthy. They needed some meat or fresh vegetables. But how was he ever to acquire these things without any money? When there was produce left over at the restaurant Ida gave it to the Levi’s for the children. But often there was nothing left. Never telling anyone what he was doing, Dovid began to pick the spoiling produce out of the garbage behind the local grocery store. He washed it well and cut off the rotten parts, then gave it to Eidel to make soup. She never asked him where he got the vegetables or why they were cut up. She quite simply boiled water and prepared a soup. Dovid refused to give up. Every week he continued to look for work, taking the L into the city. He also spent days applying at local factories, but still nothing. Dovid was a fighter but failure had made him feel the heaviness of defeat and he began to walk with his shoulders slumped and his head down.
There has to be a job I can get. There must be something that I can do for work. There must be something I am missing? Some stone I’ve left unturned, he thought, but he could think of nothing.
And then came the winter of 1971. It was a chilly day in early January. The house had been up for sale for a long time, but there had been no offers. The restaurant was doing a little better. It was paying its own bills and both mortgages, but just barely. If the house didn’t sell and the restaurant couldn’t pay, the Levis would be evicted and Dovid would have to move his family into a cheap apartment in the city. And, truth be told, if things continued the way they were going, he wouldn’t even be able to afford that. All three children were sick with colds. Dovid blamed himself for that too. After all, he was not heating the house properly.
Arnie, what would you think of me now? I am so ashamed. My kids need better food. Eidel should be able to make them chicken soup but she can’t. There is no money for chicken. Arnie, what the hell am I going to do?
Then, Dovid got an idea. He hated himself for what he was about to do, but he knew he must do it. The family kept rags that had once been baby clothes under the kitchen sink. Dovid cut the fabric into squares. Then he made pockets on the inside of his winter coat. Sewing them carefully, he then tested them to make sure they were strong enough to hold two cans of beans.
Next, he put on his coat and walked several blocks in a blizzard to the grocery store. Dovid was resorting to the unthinkable in order to provide for his family. On that day, Dovid Levi, knowing his parents would be filled with shame, began stealing food. He did it only when there was no other possible way to acquire food, and he never took more than he needed. But if he was unable to find odd jobs, then once a week he would take a chicken or a block of cheese. Occasionally, he would come back and get a box of noodles or rice. Eidel never asked where the food came from but he was sure she knew. After all, she hung up his coat and never questioned why he’d sewn pockets into it. He was grateful for her love, but when he looked into her eyes he was terribly ashamed.
By the end of March, the weather had become too warm for Dovid to be wearing a heavy coat but he needed to take a block of cheese for the children’s dinner. A lighter jacket would be pulled down by the weight of the cheese. He didn’t know what else to do. So, he wore the heavy coat and slipped the block of cheese into the inside pocket. Dovid swallowed hard and began to leave the store quickly but as he walked out the owner followed and stopped him.
“YOU, come with me,” the grocery store owner said, grabbing Dovid’s sleeve. Everyone in the store turned around to look. Dovid had never been so mortified in all of his life. Neighbors who knew the Levis stared at him with surprised looks that quickly turned to disgust. Dovid didn’t care if he went to jail, all he could think of was his children and how they would be ostracized at school when the gossip began to spread about what he had done that day.
Once the grocery store owner and Dovid were alone, the man asked Dovid to empty his pockets.
Dovid began to comply, but the man didn’t give him a chance to finish. Instead, the grocer reached into Dovid’s coat and pulled out the cheese.
“One of my employees saw you steal this,” the man said, picking up the round orange circle covered in wax.
“I’m sorry,” Dovid said, looking down at the floor. He felt sick to his stomach.
“Why would you steal? You’re a grown man, what makes a grown man steal? I am going to assume this is not your first time. Is it? Don’t lie to me.”
“No, it’s not. I have stolen from you before. I am sure you will find it hard to believe me but I am an honest man. I never wanted to do this.”
“Then why in God’s name did you?”
“I have three children. I can’t get a job. I swear to you that I never give up looking for work of any kind; I never stop trying. Every day I go out searching but so far I have been unsuccessful. I am the father of my family, the man of the house. Taking care of my wife and children is my responsibility no matter what I must do. I had no other way of providing for them … so I stole. You can put me in jail for this. I am aware of it. But my children and wife need me. If you let me go, I promise you that, as soon as I am able, I will pay you every penny for the food I have taken from you,” Dovid said, choking on the words.
The store owner looked at Dovid then his shoulders slumped, and he said, “I’m not going to call the police. Take the cheese and get out of here. But don’t come back.”
“Thank you,” Dovid said. “I promise you, I will pay you everything I owe you.”
The ground in the parking lot was filled with gray slush where the ice and snow had begun melting. The sun was beginning to set. While Dovid had been in the store, the temperature had dropped at least ten degrees and it was cold. Dovid waded through the half-frozen water and sunk down on the bench at the bus stop. He felt the frigid wind whip across his face and the chill made him feel the depth of his humiliation even more greatly. There was no one around, so Dovid started to speak aloud.
Arnie, I wish you were here to tell me what to do. I can’t find any work. I am out of money. My children are going to starve. What should I do, Arnie? I am not lazy. I would clean bathrooms, sweep floors. I’ve tried everything to get a job and no one will hire me. You were like a papa to me. In fact, you were closer to me
than my own papa whom I hardly remember. What should I do Arnie? What should I do? Something has to break or my wife and my children are going to be living in a shelter.
A tear slid down his face. He wiped it with his sleeve.
Dovid decided it was foolish to waste even a quarter. He would save the bus fare and walk home. As he walked it grew darker outside and chillier. His eyelashes froze, and his toes grew numb, but he still continued on foot toward home.
How does a man go from being a wealthy, successful businessman to taking his family to live in a flophouse? Dear God, I don’t care what happens to me but please, I am begging you, for Eidel and my kids. Please, you must show me a way to provide. I can’t take them to the flophouse to live and feed them from the soup kitchens.
Dovid passed the Synagogue where he had been a member before he lost the tavern. He’d given up the membership when he could no longer afford to pay his dues. His mind retraced the memory of the day he and Eidel had joined the temple. Dovid had been happy to give a substantial donation in honor of his parents that day. The rabbi had been kind and grateful for his generosity. Dovid had always meant to go to Shul at least on Saturday, but he had always been too busy.
Maybe I should have gone. I wanted to go, more for community than for religion. But it just never seemed like the right time. And then, well, I wasn’t a member anymore. Maybe if I had visited God’s house more often, he would have taken the time to give me an answer now, Dovid thought. Then he realized that God was sending him an answer.
Dovid’s face was hot with embarrassment but he still walked through the heavy door of Temple Beth Israel. Inside, one of the last rays of sunlight beamed through a stained glass window, leaving a pattern of vivid color on the blond hardwood floor. The warmth of the heater caressed his face and hands. As Dovid stood wiping his feet on a mat by the front door, a young woman with dark hair, wrapped in a French twist, came up to him.
“Can I help you?”
“If you please … I would like to see Rabbi Mittleman.”
“Do you have an appointment?”
“No, I am sorry, I don’t. Is he busy? Shall I make an appointment?” Dovid felt suddenly foolish for having come into the temple to see the rabbi at all.
It’s too late to back out now. I can’t let pride get in the way of caring for my loved ones.
“Let me go and ask him if he can see you. What is your name?”
“Dovid Levi.”
“Come into my office and have a seat. I’ll be right back,” the pretty young woman said. Dovid followed the woman into a small office and sat down. He waited almost ten minutes during which he wished he could run away. But even though he was uncomfortable with what he was about to do, he had to stay. He had to do this for his family.
Rabbi Mittleman was an older man. Dovid assumed probably in his late seventies. His thinning gray hair was neatly combed and he wore a clean white long sleeve shirt with baggy black pants.
“Dovid Levi!” The rabbi said, extending his hand for Dovid to shake. “It’s been a long time.”
“Yes, Rabbi. It has.”
“Well, it certainly is good to see you. Come, we’ll go into my office. Can I offer you a cup of coffee and a pastry perhaps?”
“Thank you, that would be very nice,” Dovid said, wishing he could wrap the pastry in a napkin and bring it home for the children to share. Of course, he knew he couldn’t do that in front of the rabbi. But he wished he could.
“Rachel, would you mind bringing us two cups of coffee and a tray of pastries, please?” The rabbi turned to the young woman.
“Of course, Rabbi.”
Rachel returned with a tray of coffee and pastries that she set down on the table.
“Anything else I can do for you, Rabbi?” she asked.
“No, thank you. Please close the door when you go.”
Rachel left, Dovid and the rabbi were alone. Rabbi Mittleman looked at Dovid with the kind eyes of a father who had experienced plenty of pain and said, “What brings you to me today, Dovid?”
Dovid told him. He told him everything … about the loss of his business, the inability to find work. Then he began to weep when he admitted to stealing food. The rabbi sat quietly and listened.
“I hope you won’t look down on me for the things I’ve done,” Dovid said, staring at the floor.
“I have faced plenty of tragedy in my life. In fact, you know what? I too have stolen food.”
“You, Rabbi?”
“Oh yes, it was long ago. But I will never forget.” The rabbi pulled up his sleeve to reveal a crude tattoo of blue numbers on his forearm. “I was in a concentration camp. I needed food to live. I took what I could steal. I don’t look down on you, Dovid.”
“What can I do, Rabbi? How can I take care of my family? Tell me and I’ll do whatever you say.”
“It just so happens, Dovid Levi, that I need a custodian here at the temple. It would be a perfect job for you. Would you like it?”
“Oh yes. Oh, thank you, Rabbi … God bless you, Rabbi.”
“You need a job. I need a good man. It will work out well for both of us. Go home now. Get some rest. You’ll start work tomorrow. But before you leave, why don’t you wrap up these pastries and take them home for your children. I know how much children enjoy sweets. And I am getting too fat. So it’s better if they are not sitting around here. When they’re here I eat them,” the rabbi said, winking. Then he got up and patted Dovid on the shoulder.
“Are you sure, Rabbi?”
“Of course, I am sure. Use the napkins.” The rabbi smiled. Then he left the room.
And so it was that Dovid began working as a custodian at Temple Beth Israel. Several months later, when the young woman who was the rabbi’s secretary decided to go back to college, the rabbi asked Dovid if he knew of anyone who could type and do mailings for him part-time. With all three children in school most of the day, Eidel was free to take the job. The rabbi hired her. And so, between what Dovid earned and Eidel earned they were able to keep their home. Ida and Harry sold their house, but they kept the restaurant open. It made just enough money for them to rent a small apartment above the restaurant.
CHAPTER FORTY-SIX
July 1972
The Levis still didn’t earn enough money to purchase an automobile; they used public transportation. However, even with all he had lost, Dovid was grateful to God that the family had been able to keep their home and that there was enough food on the table each night. The Levi children didn’t have all the material things that their classmates had, and many times Dovid would see envy on his children’s faces when one of their friends received a new toy. Dovid wished he could give them everything in the world. However, he couldn’t, so he did what he was able to do in order to make their lives better. If someone was looking for a handyman to fix a faucet or shovel snow, Dovid was always willing to do the work. He would then put the extra money toward things the children needed. But, sometimes, he would splurge and buy something for Eidel. Something he knew would make her smile. And, even after all these years together, her smile could still light up his world. For Hanukkah every year, each child received new shoes, one pair of pajamas, and a few pairs of underwear. If it was at all financially possible, Dovid tried to get them each a small toy to open on the eighth and final night. He loved to see them excited with anticipation.
When Mark turned nine, he had two friends from school over for birthday cake. Dovid went to a resale store where he negotiated a deal on a used bicycle, which he bought for Mark. But when he gave it to Mark, he showed no interest in the bike.
“Don’t you like it?” Dovid asked.
Mark just shrugged.
Dovid was worried about his son, who refused to play any sports and had no interest in learning to ride the bike. Dovid knew that when the boys in the neighborhood went to the park to play football, Mark stayed inside. He was not a popular boy. He spent most of his time alone in his room. However, he did have one thing he truly loved—the the
ater. Several days a week, Mark would stay after school to be a part of the drama club. And it was there that he excelled. He made a couple of close friends and these two came to his birthday party. One was a scrawny girl with thin, stringy blond hair and a wonderful singing voice and the other was Earl Shulman. At nine years old, Earl was already handsome; he could sing like Frank Sinatra and dance like Fred Astaire. When Mark’s elementary school put on a production, Mark was always a part of the cast but Earl was always the lead. After rehearsal, Earl would come to the Levi’s home to spend time with Mark. Sometimes, Dovid could hear Mark singing songs from Broadway musicals.
I should have gotten him a record player and some records. I got him a bike because it’s what I would have wanted as a kid. But, let’s face it. I knew it was not something he would like, Dovid thought.
I was just hoping that if I got it for him he would ride it. I just can’t help worrying about that boy. Something isn’t quite right with him. What am I going to do if my only son is a fagel? That would be a father’s nightmare. What a rough life Mark would have if he liked boys instead of girls. Oy, God forbid.
As Mark grew up, Dovid felt that they were growing more and more apart. Something about Mark scared his father. Every day, Dovid found himself hoping that a miracle would occur and Mark would change into what Dovid felt was a more normal boy.
Eight-year-old Abby, on the other hand, was both fascinated and terrified of the used bike. She went into the basement and gingerly touched the handlebars.
If only I could ride and feel the wind on my face, she thought. But I could fall and get hurt. I don’t know if I can keep my balance without someone else holding me up. I don’t think I’m strong enough to keep the bike straight.
New Life, New Land Page 13
