by Maeve Binchy
They were unexpectedly helpful, it turned out, on the subject of the Chicago wedding. Cathy wished that Tom were here to share the ideas and the conversation that went backwards and forwards. Her hand raced across the notebook writing things down, as Joe had been doing about his fashion show earlier. Joe wanted to know all about the hall they had hired… It was an old church hall attached to a parish where James Byrne knew the parish priest. The priest had been happy with the thought of any money whatsoever for the parish, so the price was reasonable. Cathy and Tom had been to inspect it, and thought it was fine. It could be used as two areas, one for the reception and drinks and the other for the food, then the first one would be cleared for dancing. It would hold a hundred people comfortably, had fair kitchen space and cloakrooms. They could decorate it as they liked—Marian had suggested she would like an Irish-American theme, and maybe flags. Joe said that he thought it was over the top to drape the hall with US and Irish flags. Shona said it wasn't over the top at all, it was exactly what they would like. The Americans were travelling many thousands of miles for a ceremony; it must be marked. Geraldine asked was there a budget, and Cathy said yes there was, but of course they would go over it for Marian's sake. Joe debated buffets. He thought they were far better, you didn't get stuck with anyone. Geraldine said that the point of this was for people to get to know each other, and perhaps it should be a carefully thought-out seating plan. Shona said the thinking nowadays was not to mix up the families but let each side sit with its own. Geraldine had been at a smart wedding recently where everyone changed seats after each course—all the men moved to the next table—it meant that everyone got to know more people. Joe had been to a wedding where the receiving line was on a little stage surrounded with flowers. Cathy thought that Marian would prefer it to be as traditionally Irish as possible; people often thought like that when they had left home. Of course, it depended what you meant by traditional.
'You're the only married person at the table, Cathy,' Joe said. 'What would you like, what was your own wedding like… ?'
'You don't want to know about my wedding, oh, believe me, you don't,' Cathy said ruefully.
'It wasn't that bad,' Geraldine said.
'Well, that was only thanks to you,' Cathy said, grateful always to her aunt for having saved the day. 'We had the reception at Peter Murphy's hotel, lovely salmon I remember, my mother had to be sedated, my father bribed, Neil's parents stayed for thirty-five minutes. The priest we had was very decent, by the way. He said the right thing to everyone, it was just that no one was listening. Hannah's nose got further up in the air and my mother's head nearer the ground.'
The others laughed at the image, but Cathy was serious. 'No, if you only knew, it's quite true. We wanted to get married quietly, in London maybe, and go back to Greece, but we thought we owed it to them. Neil was the only boy in the Mitchell family and I was the only Scarlet left at home. We didn't want to short-change them. Boy, were we wrong!' Her face was set hard.
Geraldine lightened the mood. 'Well as far as we know Marian's doing what she wants, not what she thinks whole groups of the previous generation want.'
'But does she know what she wants? She thinks Ireland is coming down with Irish dancers leaping up into the air and that two of them are called Simon and Maud. She's probably told all the Americans that the place is like Maureen O'Hara in The Quiet Man.'
'Well give it to her,' Joe said as if it were obvious.
'The customer's always right,' said Shona.
'The atmosphere is more important than the food, I've always said that,' Geraldine said.
'Well thanks for the vote of confidence in the caterers,' Cathy laughed.
'No, silly, you know what I mean.' Geraldine was brisk. She summed up all the arguments for and against every suggestion they made. No wonder she had got on so well in business, she had a very clear mind. Cathy finally had a proper plan in front of her.
They cleared the table in minutes between the four of them and shortly afterwards, Shona and Joe left to go back to work. Cathy watched them from the window. Geraldine was sitting on one of the sofas when Cathy turned away from the window. She had poured two glasses of wine.
I'm not sure…' Cathy began.
'Sit down please, Cathy.' The voice was firm; it wasn't an invitation, it was more a command.
'Sure.'
'What is it, Cathy? Tell me, please.'
'What do you mean?' she blustered.
'Don't insult me. I've known you since the day you were born, I skipped school and went in to see Lizzie in the hospital. You were already terrifying her with your roaring and bawling… So you won't go on pretending that's everything's all right, we have been down too many roads together to lie to each other at this stage. It's one of two things: either I have offended you or annoyed you by something I did or said, or else it has nothing to do with me and you're in some bad trouble.' She sat there on her sofa, her legs tucked underneath her, looking ten years younger than her age. Always immaculately groomed, dressed today in a navy and cream outfit as if she were going to Quentin's instead of hosting a working lunch.
'Which would you like it to be, Geraldine?' Cathy said eventually.
'Well obviously I'd prefer it to have been something I said or did, then I could explain it and apologise if necessary. Naturally that's what I'd want, rather than to think you had an illness or your marriage had problems.'
Cathy said nothing.
'So can I ask you again, which is it?'
'It's neither and both in a way.' Geraldine waited.
'All right,' Cathy said eventually. 'You're going to think this silly, but I was upset when you told me you took presents from men.'
Geraldine looked at her. 'You're not serious.'
'I'm very serious. It's only one degree away from taking cheques… it's so tacky, Geraldine. You don't need that. You're the icon for us all, you're the role model, for God's sake.'
'And you've changed your opinion of me since I told you that Freddie bought me this watch...'
'Well, yes, and that Peter gave you the flat and that someone else gave you that sound system, and the rug, and for all I know everything here.'
Geraldine's face was cold. 'You actually think less of me. Me, your friend, because I accepted gifts.'
'Yes, I do, it's so tacky, and it's so unnecessary. You don't love these men who fancy you, Geraldine, you haven't loved any of them, they're just… they're just… Well, I'd say a meal ticket, but you don't need a meal ticket, you have your own business.'
'Go on.'
'I shouldn't have started this, I feel much cheaper than I am accusing you of being, sitting here throwing back all your generosity to me and to my family…'
Geraldine just sat, calm and motionless.
'You forced me to say it. I see now why you didn't feel upset being in Peter Murphy's house… you never cared about them, not one little bit, it was all for this…' She made a sweeping gesture around the room and its style. Her face was red and upset. Geraldine seemed unmoved. 'So what do you have to say to me? You said you wanted me to tell you and now I have. Is it going to be a stony silence?'
'No, Cathy, but nor is it going to be one word of apology, not one.'
'You're proud of all this?'
'I'm neither proud not ashamed, it's a way to live.'
'And you never loved any of them, that's right, isn't it?'
'I loved Teddy,' Geraldine said.
'Teddy?'
'Oh, I loved Teddy and he loved me, but not enough to leave his wife for me.'
'But that was back a long time ago. People didn't then.'
It was twenty-two years ago, not the Dark Ages, and people did leave home and start again, as Teddy said he would, and as I believed he would, particularly when I was pregnant.' Cathy stared at her. 'But it turned out not to be the case.' The voice was very flat. Cathy hardly dared to move. 'And we agreed that the timing was all spectacularly bad, I can't remember what, one of his children going to school
or leaving school or hating school or loving school. Some bloody thing. Does it matter?' Cathy took a sharp breath. This was horrifying. 'But it meant that there could be no baby.' A long pause. 'I could have kept the baby. But then I knew I'd lose Teddy, so I lost the baby instead. A friend of his was a doctor, not a great doctor, as it happened, and I had left it too late so that complicated it, and I don't think this doctor was entirely sober at the time. So after that, no more babies, ever.'
'Geraldine.' Cathy was stricken.
'So after that, as you can understand, I was a bit low, but I thought I'd have Teddy to comfort me, but as it happened I didn't. He was nervous. I had become a loose cannon on the deck, and he took his family and went abroad. So, Cathy, it sounds very dramatic but I didn't allow myself to wallow too much in the luxury of love after that. The men I've known since and who have been my friends like my company and conversation just as much as my bed and my wearing lacy underwear. I have not been dependent on any of them for anything. They can't offer me commitment or a home, so they give me watches and that silk rug on the floor in front of you. But I'm sorry if it upsets you and you think less of me and that it's, what did you say, tacky,' she repeated Cathy's accusations with great emphasis. 'That's all I can say. I'm sorry if it offends you, but it doesn't offend me, and it's my life.'
I'm so ashamed I could die,' Cathy said.
Geraldine sighed. 'Leave it, Cathy. You had guts to say it, I give you that much. And what was the other thing that was upsetting you, the one that didn't have to do with me?'
Cathy spoke slowly. 'I don't suppose there could be any more inappropriate thing to tell you, but I think I might be pregnant, and it's the last thing on earth I want now.'
Chapter Six
JUNE
'What time is she coming?' Tom asked. 'Who?'
'Well excuse me, but I thought all this shining and polishing and getting out the best linen was to impress your mother-in-law,' Tom said.
'Oh, sorry Tom, I was miles away. Hannah's coming about half past twelve.'
'Let's get the skates on then, and go and make some soup,' he suggested.
Cathy leaped up guiltily. Tom had been here since five a.m., and she had been barely able to get in by nine. The bread had been delivered to Haywards, he had stopped at the fish shop on the way back, he had got all the vegetables and a huge lamb bone for a big soup order, he had already made her two cups of coffee and she had done nothing. Of course she hadn't told Neil last night. There had been no time. After the hours of crying in Geraldine's flat she had felt drained. Neil had been distracted, stuck in his books. And as Geraldine had soothed and consoled her over and over, it might be a false alarm. She must get a Predictor first, from the chemist, and then go to a doctor. Then and only then should she tell Neil.
'Tom, I'm so sorry. Here, pass me over the knife, I'll start chopping the basil and tomatoes.'
'She'll think it's tinned,' he objected.
'No she won't, so what, anyway?'
'You've got very courageous suddenly,' he said.
'No, I'm still terrified of her, but at least now I know there's no pleasing her, so that helps a bit.' Cathy's eyes were a little too bright.
'I don't think you should have a knife in your hand this morning,' Tom said. 'You'll be in ribbons by the time she comes. Leave the dangerous stuff to me.'
'Great. So what do I do?'
'Set the table, get some flowers.'
They had a great bank of flowerpots in a wheelbarrow in their courtyard. Whenever they wanted a table decoration they just lifted out a pot of primulas, pansies or begonias, cleaned it around the edges and placed it in a brass container. When the function or the need to impress was over, the plant went back outdoors.
'That doesn't sound very much,' Cathy said.
'And start practising your smile. Remember the last time Hannah Mitchell was here? You were shouting at her like a fishwife about her coat and your mother and assorted other topics.'
'Oh, we've all mellowed since those days,' Cathy said loftily.'I think we'd need to have,' said Tom, who had already got the stock into the soup saucepan and begun the work.
'Imagine, we'll be going home on the bus today,' Simon said to Maud.
'By ourselves, no Muttie,' Maud said.
'He said he might happen to be walking by the school sometimes, and he'd walk us to the bus,' Simon said.
'But he's probably going to the shoemaker's or the bookmaker's, it's not really on his way,' Maud worried.
'How else will we ever see Hooves?' Simon said, and they looked at each other in concern. It hadn't been actually said, but they knew that social visits to St Jarlath's Crescent were going to be very few and far between.
'You're a very sweet girl, you know, Geraldine,' Freddie said as they had coffee together in her office. He had called in to discuss the Italian villa presentation, which would be upcoming soon. But they were also talking about his own party, for which Geraldine's niece and her parIner were going to do the catering.
'I know I am,' Geraldine said. I'm totally delightful, but in what particular way at the moment?'
'You're as anxious as I am that the party Pauline and I are having will be a success,' he said in some wonder.
'But why ever not, Freddie? I don't want anything from you except what I have, your company, your interest, your concern, your wonderful loving… Why should I not be interested and wish it all well?'
'You're amazing. You really mean it.' Freddie Flynn had not come across such women before.
'You know what the French used to say about a mistress. She must be discreet, and never, ever do anything that would upset the man's family, his children and certainly not his property…' She laughed engagingly at him.
'You ask so little, Geraldine,' he said in a throaty voice.
'But that's not true, and truly I have so much.' She waved her hand around the office, the business that was hers alone. The hand that she waved had a jewelled watch on the wrist.
'So Cathy will come round to the house and set it all up with Pauline, will she?'
'Yes, Cathy or Tom, they take it turn by turn. He's just as good,' Geraldine said.
She hoped it would be Tom that made the visit. The way poor Cathy was behaving at the moment, she wouldn't be able to keep her eye on the ball at all.
'Nice to see you, Mrs Mitchell, and don't you look well.
'Thank you, Shona,' Hannah patted her hair. 'I've just had a glorious hour in the salon. I'm going to have lunch with Cathy, as it happens. I thought I'd buy her a little gift. What do you suggest?'
'Well, now, if it were anyone else I'd say a loaf of that delicious bread that Scarlet Feather does for us, but you'll be having that anyway… Flowers are always nice, a fancy soap maybe?'
'The bread doing well, is it?'
'We can't keep it on the shelves or in the restaurant. I told Tom that we're going to have to make him an offer he can't refuse and come and work here full-time.'
'Imagine.' Hannah was surprised.
'Anyway, enjoy your lunch, Mrs Mitchell. Lots of people would envy you, you know.'
'Yes, I'm beginning to realise that,' Hannah said in a disapproving voice.
She still found it hard to accept that she was lucky to begetting a meal cooked for her by the maid's daughter. But she must not think like that, or else something would slip out as it so often did for absolutely no reason at all, and then everyone took horrific offence and Neil sighed and Jock sighed and Cathy went totally berserk. Don't say poor Lizzie. It was just an expression, but try telling that to Cathy Scarlet.
James Byrne had decided to cook a dinner that night. Not the real one, not the one he was rehearsing for, but just to see whether he could or not. And as it happened, Martin Maguire was going to be in Dublin. He would try it out on him. He took out Cathy and Tom's meticulous instructions—they had even typed out advice about the shopping. It was a Monday morning, he had nothing else to do with his time, he would go to the market that they had suggested with
their list in hand. Martin Maguire would be very surprised indeed to be presented with such a gourmet meal. And it would be great practice for James. He had enjoyed those two evenings with Tom and Cathy enormously, and wished he could think of an excuse for more. But he must remember that this had been his undoing before. Becoming too fond of people, too dependent. It must not happen again.
'This house will never be the same,'Muttie said when the children had left for school. 'Those people won't get the children to do their homework the way we did.' He shook his head sadly.
'They'd know more than we do,' Lizzie said.
It had always worried her, looking after the children of the quality in her own home.
This was something that had never worried Muttie. 'It's a matter of discipline,' he said firmly. 'This house has proper rules and regulations.' And at that, he got out the paper and studied the racing pages, while Hooves laid his sad black head on his knee, and the woman that the children still called Muttie's wife got ready to leave a house that had proper rules and regulations to go out and clean the apartments and houses of the quality.
Joe Feather called his brother.
'Could I buy you a nice pint and a plate of sausages for lunch?' he offered.
'God, I'd love it Joe, but it has to be late. I'm setting up a lunch here for Cathy's mother-in-law!'
'Is it a big do?'
'No, only the two of them.'
'God, you've fallen on hard times, a lunch for two people. Have I invested in a Mickey Mouse company?'
'No, you fool, it's a social thing.'
They fixed a place to meet.
'Give Cathy my love. Thank her for everything yesterday.' Joe hung up.
'Hey, you didn't say you met my brother yesterday,' Tom said.
'Tom, I haven't said anything this morning. I'm like a zombie. I met him at Geraldine's, and he was a great help about the Chicago wedding. Actually he really was, I meant to tell you. I took lots of notes.'
