‘You saw?’ asked Flo.
They both nodded. ‘You OK?’ asked Pia.
‘Is anyone going to tell me what’s going on?’ Aunt Maddie demanded.
Pia looked at me. I looked at Flo. Flo looked at Meg. Aunt Maddie looked at all of us. ‘I’m waiting.’
‘Boys, Aunt Maddie,’ I said. ‘They do your head in.’
‘Ah. And which boy is this?’ she asked. ‘I thought you liked the one at Porchester Park. Isn’t he away?’
‘Er, we’ll go and get more supplies,’ said Pia and she dragged Meg off to the counter with her.
‘I’ll come and help,’ said Flo.
Aunt Maddie was still waiting for my answer. ‘You mean JJ. I do like him. It’s still early days with us but he has promised to take me on a date when he’s back. Thing is . . . I don’t know if it could ever work with us. You know how it is, Aunt M, his family are loaded, they travel in a private jet, holiday on exclusive islands, have credit cards falling out of their pockets. I can’t hope to keep up. I’m pretty sure it won’t work.’
Aunt Maddie glanced out of the window. ‘So who did you just see?’
‘Tom Robertson. I’ve had a crush on him since he arrived at our school at the end of last year. That’s not easy either though.’
‘Tell me.’
I sighed. ‘He goes to my school. He’s arrogant, he’s full of himself, just about every girl at school is in love with him, me included. There I’ve said it. We do have chemistry. Least I thought we did. I’m careful not to let him know that I’m into him though. He’s the kind of boy who likes a challenge.’
‘You’re not a girl afraid of a challenge so why not go for him?’
‘I’ve been trying to play it cool because there are so many girls into him.’
‘Which boy do you like best?’
‘That’s what’s so difficult. I like both of them, for different reasons. Tom’s a laugh but he’s not into having a proper relationship. He’s the biggest flirt on the planet. JJ’s so interesting and good to talk to but I can’t help but think that he’s out of my league and it wouldn’t work with him so I can’t let my head get too into thinking about him. I suppose I was keeping my options open in case either of them let me down or if anything happened like just now when I saw Tom snogging Keira!’ I pointed out of the window. ‘That’s who we just saw.’
‘Ah. I get the picture. You OK?’
I don’t know anything any more, I thought. ‘One minute sunshine, next minute rain. See, Aunt M, I thought if I went in for this modelling competition, Tom would be more interested in me. I wouldn’t be little Miss Ordinary any more. I’d stand out from everyone else on his list of devotees at school. And I thought JJ might not think of me as way beneath him as well.’
Aunt Maddie whistled through her teeth. ‘Phew. I don’t envy you being a teenager these days. I don’t get it though. I really don’t. Do you really think that all the other girls at your school are ordinary? Or that you’re ordinary? I’d call you normal not ordinary. There’s a difference.’
‘Normal? That’s not a word I can even relate to these days.’ I hoped that she wasn’t going to go into one of her lectures. I so wasn’t in the mood.
‘I don’t know, Jess. It seems that things have got a bit lopsided in your world and when it comes to the heart, sometimes you have to take a risk. Do either of the boys know how you really feel?’
‘No way. With Tom I might end up on a list of rejects and with JJ, he might soon get bored when he realises I can’t keep up with his lifestyle.’
Aunt Maddie nodded. ‘So you’ve taken the safe option to protect yourself by not choosing either. But not being brave enough to open up and make yourself vulnerable hasn’t made you any happier, has it?’
Oh, here we go, I thought. ‘Understatement. I don’t know what I’m doing any more. I don’t know who I am any more and I don’t know what I want. If you can call that lopsided, then you’re right.’
‘No need to get tetchy, Jess. I just think you need to make up your mind who you want and go for it. Don’t be afraid to put yourself into the firing line and fight for someone when the heart is concerned.’ Maybe she’s right, maybe I should have replied to some of JJ’s texts, I thought. Oh I don’t know!
Luckily, Meg, Flo and Pia reappeared and Aunt Maddie dropped the lecture.
‘OK,’ said Pia. ‘So you forget about Tom, yeah? He’s a loser.’
‘Forget about Tom? Easy to say.’
Pia ignored my comment, made a gesture with her hand as if brushing it away, then she produced a piece of paper. ‘Tom’s not the priority this week. Me and the girls were chatting in the queue for drinks. We’ve decided, you have to be like a footballer before a match. No distractions. Focus on the game. I’ve made a list. You jog, you drink water with lemon in it, lots of it – so good for your skin – you get lots of sleep, you eat raw food, you condition your hair.’
Flo and I exchanged glances.
Aunt Maddie laughed. ‘Your love life might be complicated, Jess, but at least you have good friends.’
‘I mean it,’ said Pia. ‘Flo said your shots today were great. We think you could win.’
‘The photos go live on the site tomorrow and then it’s down to votes,’ said Flo.
‘Let me take care of that,’ said Meg. ‘My brother’s a whiz on computers. We’ll get you votes.’
‘All the other girls will have brothers too,’ I said.
Pia made an exaggerated miserable face. ‘And that attitude has to go too!’
She can be a bossy cow at times. Does no-one realise that my heart has just been broken?
The rest of the week, Pia was true to her word. She got me up at seven and out jogging.
At break in school, she made me drink so much water, I had to ask for permission in class to go to the loo. Twice.
She stood over me as I applied her mum’s rejuvenating skin cream.
She talked her mum into giving me the proper pro all-over spray tan job. I looked like I’d been for a few weeks in the Caribbean when she’d finished.
On Thursday, I had to go to Atlas Buildings for a fitting for my casual outfit and my evening dress for the catwalk finale and Pia came with me. A whole rail of clothes had been loaned by designers wanting PR for their collections. Suzie had already picked out who should wear what. My casual outfit was OK, nothing spectacular but then none of them were – just jeans and various sporty tops. My dress was gorgeous though. An off-the-shoulder, peacock blue silk number by Mercedes Valanti, an up-and-coming new designer. I felt like a star when I had it on.
‘It looks fantastic,’ said Pia. ‘It brings out your eyes and looks great with your hair colour.’
I noticed Keira at the other side of the room getting into a flame red dress. It looked stunning. I also noticed that she wasn’t being so friendly today.
‘Go and ask her about Tom,’ said Pia.
I shook my head. ‘She’ll only realise that I cared, although I am curious as to how they met.’
‘Coward,’ said Pia.
She was right. ‘Put yourself in the firing line,’ Aunt Maddie had said. She was right too. I’d been pussyfooting around for long enough as far as boys were concerned. I took a deep breath and went over. ‘Great dress, Keira.’
She shrugged. ‘Not sure red is my colour but Suzie insists.’
‘I . . . so, I saw you with a boy from our school last Saturday.’
She gave me a fake smile. ‘Tom. Yeah. I wondered when you were going to ask me about him.’
‘How did you two meet?’
‘That day I came to see you at your school. After you’d got onto the bus, he saw me and then—’
‘Wow. That’s weeks ago. Why didn’t you say anything?’
‘I knew you were into him so I didn’t want to freak you out. I saw your journal that day in the café, remember?’
‘You looked at my journal?’
‘You left it lying on the table. Interesting read.’
‘But if you knew I liked him, why did you go out with him?’
‘Why not? You aren’t a couple, are you? All is fair in love and war, and as far as you and I are concerned, Jess, it’s war.’
‘Why? What have I ever done to you?’
Keira sized me up. ‘Everything always comes so easy to you. In with Tanisha. In with the Lewises. You want JJ but you want Tom as well. Why should you have both of them? You can’t have everything and you don’t own him just because you have a crush on him and like to write his name in your little book.’
She had me there. He wasn’t mine. I knew that only too well. ‘Well, just be careful. Tom’s a player. There are loads of girls after him.’
‘You would say that, wouldn’t you? Can’t bear for me to have him when you got nowhere with him. Accept it, Jess, he just wasn’t that into you.’
Her words cut into me. She was probably right.
Suzie clapped her hands for attention.
‘OK, girls, go home, get rest and I’ll see you back here on Saturday afternoon ready for the finale,’ she said. ‘Any questions, problems, give me a call.’
Across the room, Pia was beckoning me away from Keira. She’d obviously seen my face and worked out that the conversation hadn’t gone well.
‘Hey, don’t let her get to you, Jess,’ she said when I joined her.
‘I’ll try not to but . . . I don’t understand why she’s got it in for me.’
‘Because she’s jealous, you idiot,’ said Pia.
‘Why would she be jealous? She’s got Tom. She’s won.’
Pia rolled her eyes. ‘You’ve got JJ. You’ve got loads of mates. You’re a great person. People like you and are wary of her. Always have been. Listen, Tom does your head in, always has, always will. Boys like that aren’t worth the time.’
‘So why do I care?’
‘Because you’re an idiot too,’ said Pia. ‘But at least you have friends. Come on, let’s go. When the going gets tough, the tough go for hot chocolates.’
‘Am I allowed, Miss Stricty Pants?’
‘Just this once,’ she said with a grin.
As we left the building, I noticed Tom hovering at the bottom of the steps.
‘Ignore him,’ said Pia.
I was about to but then I felt a flash of anger. So he was with Keira now but he’d been playing me along for months. I decided I wasn’t going to play any more games. Are we into each other? Aren’t we? I needed to know the truth. ‘Just give me a sec, Pia,’ I said and I marched over to Tom.
‘Hi, Tom, waiting for Keira?’
He looked uncomfortable then flashed his usual killer-watt smile. ‘I might be waiting for you.’
‘But you’re not, are you? You never told me you knew her when you asked for tickets to the finale.’
He grinned again. ‘Ah, I knew you cared, Hall.’
This time his arrogant cheek wasn’t working its usual charm.
‘Yes. I might have cared. Once. But why the secrecy? I’ve known her for ages and you and me go to the same school. If you’ve got a girlfriend, why not go public?’
A look of annoyance flashed over his face. ‘My private life. I like to keep it private.’
‘So that all your other girls don’t realise that you’re actually with someone? You just want to keep your options open, don’t you?’
He sighed heavily and looked at the pavement. ‘Keira told me you’d get jealous.’
His words hurt. So they’d been talking about me. Was I jealous? Of course I was but something in me had suddenly changed and it felt like I was seeing clearly for the first time in months.
Tom looked up from the ground. ‘We’re free agents, Jess. I know we have something special but you know me, I don’t do commitment. And I don’t have to tell you what I’m doing or answer to you.’
‘No. Of course not. Just—’
He sighed again. ‘I never took you to go all heavy on me.’
‘I . . . No. Not heavy, Tom. I didn’t mean to come across like that. Just I like things to be clear, I like to know where I stand.’
Tom’s eyes twinkled. ‘Right here at the bottom of the steps. That’s where you stand.’
‘Oh haha. Listen. I’m going to be honest. I do like you. Always have and I think you’re right we do have something special, could have done anyway, but I don’t want to play games or feel I can’t say what I want to in case I seem uncool or heavy. I want a boy who plays it straight.’
‘I told you that I don’t do commitment, Jess.’
‘I know. And I think I’ve finally heard you. Thing is, I do. I’m ready.’
Tom looked worried and put his hand out as if to say, stop. ‘Whoa—’ he started.
‘Not with you, dummy. I get you. You don’t do commitment. I heard you this time, loud and clear. But I do. So we’re no match. You can cross me off the list. I’m no longer a contender for the Tom Robertson girlfriend wannabe group. I’m moving on to be with someone who actually plays it straight. Someone who doesn’t mess with my head and who comes out and says what he wants and feels.’
As I walked away, I felt like a dark cloud that I’d been carrying around for months had lifted. I’ve been stupid, I thought. Coming up with excuses as to why it won’t work with JJ and trying to be cool and aloof, but all along, he’s been constant, straight and honest. When you find the right one, you don’t have to play head games or try to be someone you’re not for fear of losing them.
As I headed off with Pia, I glanced over at Tom who had now been joined by Keira. She wrapped her arms around him but he was looking over her shoulder after Pia and me and he didn’t look happy.
17
Cinderella
‘My dress has gone!’ I said.
‘It can’t have,’ said Pia. ‘Someone’s probably moved it.’ She began searching through the rails.
It was Saturday afternoon and Pia had come along with me for the final fitting and run-through before the catwalk show in the evening.
‘I’ve looked. It’s definitely not there.’
At the other end of the changing room, I saw Keira watching us. My stomach tightened. I knew she had something to do with it.
Suzie appeared behind us. ‘What’s the problem?’ she asked.
‘My dress has disappeared.’
Suzie sighed heavily. ‘Just what we need.’ She glanced at her watch. ‘We have an hour. We’re supposed to be rehearsing.’ She flicked through the rails then picked out a yellow dress with a high neckline and bubble skirt.
‘I’ve sent all the others back. This is the only spare. Put this on.’
‘But—’
Suzie’s expression showed she wasn’t to be argued with and she breezed off to talk to the other girls. I slipped off my jeans and T-shirt and put on the dress. It looked hideous. Yellow makes me look ill, high necklines make my boobs look enormous, the bubble skirt made my knees look knobbly and it didn’t fit right at the back.
On the other side of the room, I saw Keira whisper something to the girl with Titian red hair. They both looked over at me and laughed.
‘What do you think, P?’ I asked.
She shook her head. ‘It does nothing for you. You can’t appear in that, not after everything you’ve gone through.’
‘So what am I going to do?’
Pia thought for a moment then got out her phone. ‘Alisha. I bet she’d lend you any one of her dresses.’
‘Oh but I don’t feel too happy about asking if I could borrow her clothes. It was one thing when we were doing our DIY fashion shoot because she was there but not now when she’s not even in the country.’
‘They’ll be on their way back from the States by now. I know they’re hoping to make the show. I’ll see if I can reach her. Come on, she’s a mate. You know you’d do the same for her.’
I raced over to Suzie. ‘I. . . . If I can get another dress in time, can I wear something else?’
Suzie glanced over me. Even she could see that the yello
w dress did me no favours. ‘Where are you going to get another couture dress from at this short notice?’
‘I have a friend. She has loads of them.’
‘Does she now?’ Suzie glanced at her watch again. ‘You’ve got just less than two hours. Whilst the others are rehearsing, go and get a dress. Be back at four and if you haven’t got a suitable replacement, you wear this one.’
I quickly changed back into my jeans, then as Pia and I headed for the door, Keira came forward and blocked my way. ‘Problem?’
‘Nothing that can’t be sorted,’ I said. I was not going to let her win by seeing that she’d ruined things. ‘Change of dress, that’s all.’
‘What a shame,’ cooed Keira. ‘The blue one looked so right.’
I stepped around her. ‘Yes, didn’t it? Strangely, it seems to have disappeared.’
‘Oh really?’ said Keira and added with fake concern, ‘How awful for you.’
‘Not at all,’ I said. ‘I’ll find something else.’
‘You seem to make a habit of losing things. First Tom, now the dress.’
‘You can have Tom,’ I said. ‘I’m not in the running for him any more but the dress? I think we both know that I didn’t lose that.’
Keira tried to do an innocent face. ‘Oh, so I wonder what happened to it?’
‘So do I. But it doesn’t matter, it’s only a dress.’
Clearly my reaction wasn’t what Keira expected. She thought I’d crumble but I wasn’t going to give in that easily.
Pia pulled me away. ‘Come on, we’ve only got two hours.’
Keira laughed. ‘Good luck, guys.’
Once outside, Pia looked at her phone and grimaced. ‘Alisha’s not picking up. It’s gone to voicemail. Maybe they’re still in the air but they were due to land ages ago.’
‘Perhaps their flight was delayed. Charlie’s at home. Let’s call him and ask if he can get hold of Marguerite and find out what’s happening. She’ll know what time they’re in.’
Pia made the call and explained everything to him. ‘He’s on the case.’
‘But what do we do if they aren’t back in time? I can’t go up to their apartment if she’s not back. I think that would be too cheeky and I already feel uncomfortable about asking her.’ I checked my watch. One hour fifty minutes left.
Catwalk Queen Page 12
