Across the soundstage, Nell had her nose buried in a book. Only her. Bring her to a massive studio during the filming of a blockbuster production, and she’s more interested in the Odyssey. I stared at her, thinking of the things I could be doing if we were alone. I could strap her to the rigging, do some deep character study involving her ass and my cock.
I’d been eager to bring her to the set, to get her out of the secluded hotel room. I thought it would be good for her to get out and about. But she retreated by herself into a quiet corner of the soundstage as soon as we arrived. And her brief meeting with Jess had not gone as I imagined it. Nell mostly blushed and stared at the floor. I tried to figure out what she was feeling, what was making her so moody. Shame? Surely she realized I’d forgiven her for the day before. Punishment meted out. Finished. Time to move on.
But she wasn’t moving on.
Jess nudged me when she noticed me looking at Nell. “Really, Jeremy. Another one? When are you going to get a real girlfriend?”
I chuckled. “Well, you’re no longer available. I take what I can get.”
“And how is this one treating you? She seems a little skittish compared to the last one.”
“We haven’t been together long.”
“She might not be up to the depths of your depravity.”
“She’s up to it.” I looked at her bent over her book, her lips drawn together in a pout of concentration. My cock twitched. “We just literally haven’t had much time, Jess. I met her…God…a couple of weeks ago.”
“And she followed you all the way to Bangkok.” Jessamine raised her eyebrows. “You must be paying her a lot. Or she must have been really desperate for work.”
“A little bit of both. Anyway, she’s not like the last one. She’s smart. She’s really…real.”
“Is she?” Jessamine looked over at her. “Be careful, or you might actually fall in love.”
“I won’t.”
“I did,” she reminded me with one of the flirty, sexy smiles she was famous for. “Never say never.”
“I didn’t say never. It’s none of your business anyway.”
And it wasn’t. Everybody thought we were their business. Everyone who met Nell that day sized her up, not like Jessamine, who knew about my darker proclivities, but like nosy people. I could tell it was difficult for Nell, the scrutiny, the constant prying questions. Having to act like my girlfriend when I didn’t think she even liked me very much.
“How long have you known Jeremy?”
“Not very long.”
“Where did you meet?”
“I was working as a waitress when he came in for dinner.”
They weren’t paparazzi, they were production people, but they were just as persistent with their questions, and Nell wasn’t comfortable with the attention. My last girlfriend had loved the attention, wallowed in it from the beginning, to the point where it disgusted me a little.
But Nell was more circumspect. No, not circumspect. She was afraid. Afraid of attention, afraid of the press and cameras. I knew it, but I didn’t want to admit it to myself. Admit that what she was enduring for me was, perhaps, not so great for her mental health. Well, I was paying her plenty of money to compensate. Wasn’t that enough?
On the way to the car at the end of the day, Kyle showed me a tabloid with photos from her foray into the street the day before. God, she looked terrified. Her expression was outwardly calm, but her eyes were filled with fear. If I had any conscience at all, I would have sent her back to L.A. on the next plane with some college tuition and a thank you very much. But I had no conscience, of course. I was perpetually selfish. I gave it back to him before Nell could see it.
“Tired?” I asked as we navigated the busy streets back to the hotel.
“No, I’m fine. I just…” She shrugged.
“What?”
“I can’t believe…the whole movie thing…behind the scenes…”
“It’s overwhelming, isn’t it?”
“I see now why you need to unwind at the end of the day. Why so many celebrities get addicted to alcohol and drugs.”
“You’re better than alcohol and drugs,” I said. She didn’t answer, just another small frown. I looked down at her hands which were clasped tightly in her lap.
“Do you…? How do you…? Are you unhappy?” Why the hell had I blurted that out? I rubbed my eyes and sighed. “Look, are you really miserable here with me?”
She was quiet a moment, then, “Do I seem miserable?”
“Yes, you do, to be honest.” I took a deep breath. “Do you want to go home?”
“Do you want me to go home?”
“Just answer my question, please. Do you want to go home?”
“No.”
I eased back against the seat. “It will get better. Soon, Nell.”
“I know.”
We rode a long time in silence. She was rigid beside me. So unhappy. Why couldn’t she smile?
“Just tell me what’s wrong,” I said.
She shook her head. “Nothing.”
“Something’s wrong.”
“Nothing’s wrong. I’m tired. I just…” Her voice trailed off, and she waved her hand away.
“Smile for me, then,” I said.
“I don’t really feel like smiling.”
I don’t know why I felt I had to push her at that moment. But I did. “I asked you to smile for me.” I used the voice. She looked up at me.
“Do you really want me to smile?” Her voice sounded edgy. Her normally light eyes looked dark and glazed.
“I don’t like to repeat myself. I want a real smile, not a forced one.”
She waited a moment, gauged if I was serious, then gave me an approximation of a grin.
“Pitiful.” I turned away, then turned back again.
“What’s your name, Nell?” I wanted a reaction, and I got one. She hissed through her teeth and snapped at me.
“What? Why are you like this? What do you want?”
“I just want to know your real name—”
“Why?”
“Because I fucking want to!”
She turned to look out the window again. So much anger under the surface, for both of us. I took her hand.
“Look, I’m stressed. Okay? Relax me, talk to me. Tell me another story. A story from your work.”
She was quiet for so long, I thought she wasn’t going to do it, but then she said, “One time this guy came into Eden. He was really hot, the hottest guy I’d ever seen. But I could tell right off he wasn’t really a dominant. I had no idea what he was doing there. He offered me two thousand dollars to come to my apartment and fuck me. And he did. He fucked my mouth and my cunt and my ass—”
“Nell—”
“It was so weird. It was almost as if he was trying me out, sampling the goods. And you know what, he actually was. He worked for this perverted movie star who—”
“Enough!”
We sat in uneasy silence. She said she didn’t want to leave, but it was also apparent that she thought I was a dick.
He worked for this perverted movie star who—
Who what? Who was an asshole? Who ruined my life? Who got me fired from my job? Who dragged me to Thailand to make me miserable?
“You’re a submissive,” I said, trying not to let my injured pride sound in my voice. “You’re my submissive. If you’re going to stay, you need to show a little respect.”
“Yes, Jeremy,” she said in a perfectly docile tone that broadcast fuck you loud and clear.
“I mean it. I don’t care if you dislike me. I don’t care if you’re miserable here. Put up with it or leave, just like I offered you. If you want to leave, just let me know.”
But I didn’t tell her that I would have paid for her college anyway if she left, would have gotten her old job back if she wanted it too. I didn’t want to make leaving an attractive proposition for her. Perpetually selfish. Hard habit to break.
She chewed her lip, looking away
from me.
“I can’t wait to get back to the room with you,” I said. I let her mind wander over the reason why. I wasn’t even sure what I wanted to do with her. Spank her, fuck her, tie her up, sodomize her, kiss her, worship her, make her suck my cock. I was like those adolescent boys who had so many fantasies, they couldn’t get it together enough to make even one come to pass.
*
I didn’t take her hand in the elevator. There was no one around, and a day of playing boyfriend and girlfriend on the set had taken a toll on us both. She walked behind me down the hall, then stood still as a statue while I unlocked the door. As soon as we were inside, she turned to me.
“I just want to make you happy.” Her voice sounded small and tight. “I’m failing miserably, I know. I don’t know why I’m like this.”
I looked at her a long moment, looked right in her eyes.
“Prunella?”
I said it just to make her laugh. I’d been hoarding it all day. And it worked. She gave me a smile as she shook her head. It wasn’t a huge smile, but it was a start.
“You aren’t failing.” I cupped her chin in my hand to make her look at me. “Listen to me, because I’m not going to keep repeating this. I know you think you’re not good enough, that you’re not enough for me. That you’re going to be exposed for the scared, nervous, inexperienced girl you are. Well, I’ve seen it already. I know you’re scared. I know you haven’t had a whole lot of real-life sex, that you’re not the most perfect submissive in the world. But I chose you, Nell. I promise you turn me on more than anything else in the world, and God, the way you’re looking at me right now…”
I stopped talking and took her face in my hands. I kissed her, because I couldn’t stand not to when she looked at me that way, all soft, wide-eyed submission. Her lips were so warm, so giving. I pulled her close and whispered next to her ear.
“Just trust me. I’ll take care of everything. All you need to do is submit to me. That’s all. The rest will work itself out. If you truly want to make me happy, just do as I ask. Don’t be defensive, and don’t be angry anymore. You’re here, and you say you want to be, so I would like to let the rest go. The way we met, the things I did that made you so mad. The things that happened yesterday. Because we’re not going to get anywhere with this anger simmering underneath.”
I looked down at her, and she nodded. “Okay. I’ll try to let it go of it.”
“Don’t try, just do it. Or if you can’t, then please go. I have enough stress in my life. I don’t need your disapproval on top of it all.”
“I’m sorry, Jeremy. I really don’t want to go. I just get so worried and scared. I have no one else to talk to, to vent to. I know you’re a good person, that you did what you did to get me here out of—”
Love. We both heard it in the air between us clear as day, although her voice cut off with a sharp breath.
“Out of desperation,” I said. “And that’s your power over me. I was desperate to have you. I still am.” I slipped my hands under her shirt to stroke the silky skin of her lower back. “So don’t be scared. Just be Nell. Can you do that? Or have you completely forgotten who you are? Is that why you won’t tell me your name?”
“I don’t know,” she said. “I may have forgotten, a little. Or maybe I never knew.”
I ran one finger down the side of her cheek.
“Then I’ll just have to figure you out, won’t I? I’m looking forward to it. Come on,” I said. “Let’s go get you dressed.”
*
In her bedroom, I went through her suitcase until I found the corset I wanted: black matte velvet with ribbons and lace, and tiny, satin-covered buttons up the back. Next I found the back-seamed silk stockings and matching black velvet stilettos. The set had cost me a fortune, but it was worth it. I wanted her to look like my beautiful high-class whore. I beckoned her over from the door and said, “Undress.”
I loved watching her take her clothes off. While she did, I tore my own clothes off, and by the time she was finished, I was already rock hard. I pulled her over by the bed and helped her shimmy the corset over her head. I turned her to tighten the laces and fasten the tiny buttons at the top one by one.
“You’re beautiful.” I breathed down her neck as I worked. She shivered. She was so sensitive. I didn’t know how she would handle what I had planned.
When the corset was on, I knelt, taking first one foot and then the other in my hands to put on the stockings and smooth them slowly up her legs. I fastened the garters without even looking. Once, those tiny clasps completely befuddled me, but now I could work them with my eyes closed and my cock otherwise preoccupied. I stayed still on my knees to survey my handiwork. God, her legs were obscene. She was little, but her legs were perfect, strong, shapely. I kissed the top of one thigh, and she moaned softly.
I pulled myself away from her thighs and picked up the shoes. I slipped them onto her feet, then drew her down and said, “Kneel. Head to the floor. Spread your legs.”
She obeyed perfectly, but of course I put my hands on her anyway, rearranging her just for the sole purpose of feeling her up. “Don’t move,” I said. “And don’t fucking touch yourself. I’ll be right back.”
I went to my bag of tricks and pulled out a few toys and some lubricant, then went back in her room. She was exactly as I’d left her, although I thought she was probably wetter. I knelt beside her.
“You know what I want to do to you tonight, Nell? I want to play with your ass a little. Do you know why?”
It was a rhetorical question, although she humored me with a “no, Jeremy,” mumbled into the carpet.
“Because it’s mine now, and I’m going to use it a lot. I’m going to fuck it and play with it and humiliate you by sticking things inside it. Do you like having things in your ass?” I reached out to caress her bottom cheek. She jumped a little. “Look at me and tell the truth.”
“Yes, Jeremy,” she whispered, peeking over at me. “Most of the time.”
The lovely blush, the trembling, the black velvet against pale skin…
“Most of the time?”
“I haven’t had a whole lot of…really large things in my ass,” she said, her gaze dropping momentarily to my swollen cock before returning quickly to my face.
“Clients played with your ass at Eden.”
“Yes, but there was a size limit on the toys they could use.”
“What limit?”
“One and one quarter inch in diameter, and five inches long.”
I looked down at my cock. “We’re going to need to push that limit a little, I’m afraid.”
It was a joke, but she looked traumatized at the idea of taking me in her ass. I had absolutely no doubt she could take me just fine. I moved closer and took up the bottle of lube. I squeezed some of the cold liquid onto my fingers.
“You know I won’t hurt you, Nell, that’s not my kink. Relax. This will all go much easier if you do.”
Chapter Eleven
Intimacy
‡
I breached her, taking my time. I used just one finger at first, then two fingers sliding up inside her until I felt her relax.
“I’m going to put a toy in your ass now. It’s a bit larger than what was allowed at Eden, but not much. It will loosen you up for my cock, which you are definitely going to take tonight.”
She made a small, strangled noise of assent into the floor, but I didn’t need her permission. I was already sliding in the little glass toy. I liked glass, it was less forgiving. She took it well, moaning softly but not moving at all.
“Good girl,” I said when it was fully seated. “Now kneel up and suck my cock. Don’t even think about coming from that little toy in your ass either. You don’t have my permission yet.”
“Yes, Sir.” It was a breach in protocol that I’m sure was caused by the distraction of having her ass firmly plugged. “I’m sorry,” she whispered when she realized her error.
“I’ll deal with it later. First, att
end to my cock.”
She rolled on the condom I handed her, and then took me in her mouth like any good submissive, intent on pleasuring me first and foremost. I let her lick and suck me for a while, just enjoying the warmth of her breath, the ticklish feeling of her tongue tracing over my ridges. This was the Nell I loved, open and eager to please. When I couldn’t hold off any longer, I held the back of her head and worked my way into her throat. I advanced, then withdrew, then advanced again, a little deeper each time. I swelled in her mouth, riled up by the sight of her in the beautiful black corset, with the toy in her ass, kneeling on her stocking-covered legs in service to me. She still wasn’t skilled at deep throating, but she tried. She didn’t pull away.
Eventually her nose was buried in the fur at the base of my cock. She gagged a little, and I released her. Again. I slid into her, and this time she accepted my length. I tapped her chin, and she looked up at me. Beautiful. Her eyes were watery, and drool trickled from the sides of her mouth, but she’d never looked more beautiful to me. I withdrew, felt her take in a rush of breath. I felt her gasps tickle down the length of my shaft to graze against my balls. I drew her head back and shoved it down by my sac. She opened and started lapping at my scrotum like a well-trained slut. Her back arched as she groveled before me. My cock twitched at the sight of the toy in her quivering ass. I pulled her back up by her hair and drove between her lips again. Her soft, hungry moans vibrated against my dick as I sawed in and out. She looked transported just to be sucking me. It was too much. I emptied my load with a groan, buried deep in her throat.
She waited as I rode out my climax. Afterward, I put my hand under her chin. Light pressure drew her attention back to my face. She fell away and gazed up at me, waiting to be told what to do. I threw away the condom and went to pick up my pants and draw the belt from the belt loops, doubling it over. It was a nice, thick, broken-in leather belt, perfect for situations like these. She watched, all too aware of what was coming. I snapped and pointed to the floor, and she lowered her torso into position, her ass facing me, ready to be punished. The small trace of reluctance I saw in her movement made the blood beat in my veins.
Make Me: Twelve Tales of Dark Desire Page 171
