“You can say no all you want. I won’t stop unless you safeword, or if I decide to stop.” He paused, reached out and held her chin in his large hand. “Do not forget that. No and stop are not your safewords. Silence is not your safeword. I have no intention of taking you to a point where you feel the need to stop me for real, but if you do that’s the way to do it. Do you understand?”
“Yes, Sir.” She felt safe with him, with his straight-forwardness. What was he going to pull out of that bag?
Handcuffs. Two pairs. Two? Why two? But he seemed so very in control right then, so dominant, that she didn’t feel right questioning him. Maybe later, when they were done playing, and back to being…just them. Whatever they were.
Dating. A couple. Lovers. Master/slave. What are we?
“Lie back, Grace, hands at your sides.”
She obeyed, feeling very naked and vulnerable, though he still hadn’t removed her panties. They were damp now with her desire for him, for what he offered her. Freedom to let someone else take charge. She didn’t have to worry about anything, it was all in his hands. And from what she remembered, his hands were more than capable…
“Knees up, spread your legs.”
Her hip cracked as she shifted into the unfamiliar position. Stopping her Pilates lessons had been a mistake. Ian snapped a cuff onto her right wrist, and she gasped at the feel of metal encircling her wrist.
Cold, hard steel. Ian’s finger slipped under the cuff, right by her radial pulse, and she smiled, appreciating the fact that he was checking to make sure the handcuff wasn’t so tight it would impair her circulation. He would have been a good RN, if hadn’t picked “professional Dom” as his career choice. Even with his sexually sadistic streak, he was so caring and thoughtful.
Ian pushed her thighs apart wider, holding her right ankle next to her cuffed right wrist, and suddenly she knew exactly why he needed two pairs of handcuffs for one woman.
He cuffed her wrist and ankle together, and made quick work of cuffing her wrist to her ankle on the other side as well, checking her circulation with impressive skill.
“Now there’s nowhere to go,” Ian said, smiling down at her.
Nowhere to go. The thought appealed. There was no other place she’d rather be than handcuffed with her legs spread wide under Ian. He pulled his jeans off, and his boxer-briefs.
He stretched over her body like a large panther, letting her feel some of his weight as he put his lips to her ear. A trickle of his pre-come dripped onto her inner thigh.
“Are you okay?” he whispered.
“Yes, Sir,” she whispered back, turning her mouth toward his. “I’m exactly where I want to be.”
“I have another toy for you.”
She tried to raise her head to see what he was getting out of the bag, but it was useless. Nowhere to go. She’d just have to wait until he showed her. Lying back, a familiar sense of comfort flowed through her, followed by the less familiar spike of desire. Only Ian made her pant with need like this, with anticipation.
They hadn’t even had his new brand of sex yet, and she already knew she’d miss it.
What if I don’t have to miss it? What if…
No sense in thinking about their future right now. Now was for the present, and the toy in an unopened package that Ian held above her face for her to see.
“Oh my God,” she said, laughing, her stupid nervous laugh that gave her away every time, to Ian least.
“Have you ever seen a butt plug, Grace?”
“Y-yes.” She’d stopped laughing. The website had a clip of a girl slowly sitting on a huge plug attached to a chair. Nothing had ever gone in her asshole before, although she knew the area was filled with sensitive nerve endings.
Ian closed her legs, manipulating her whole body like a marionette. Lifting her half off the bed by her ankles, he slapped the backs of her thighs and her ass, which was still covered in her panties.
How was he going to get her panties off with her ankles in cuffs?
“Yes what?” he prompted.
What? Oh shit. She’d forgotten already. “Yes, Sir. I’ve seen one before, on the website.”
“I bought this just for you, Grace. Don’t worry, it’s small and it won’t get lost inside you, not with the flared base.”
Incredible how he’d read her mind, her fears, and allayed them so quickly. How did he do that?
“I’m going to lube you up, and put this in, and then I’m going to finally get a taste of that delicious pussy of yours.”
He pressed his face against her panties, inhaling her scent. She was so wet she could smell her own arousal. If Ian hadn’t seemed so turned-on by it, she’d be embarrassed. Instead, she could see Ian’s cock had been hard this entire time. His desire for her made her feel womanly and sensual and cherished, even as he talked about taboo things like putting toys in her ass.
He rubbed his hands over her hips, caressing her.
“This might hurt,” he warned.
Oh my God. What was going to hurt? She froze, not breathing, not daring to move a muscle.
“Sometimes,” he murmured, running his finger across the top on her cotton panties, tickling her sensitive skin, “I like it rough.” With a primal grunt, he ripped her underwear off her body with a ferocity that left her breathless.
She whimpered, suddenly terrified and aroused at the same time. Her skin stung where the elastic had snapped against it, where he’d torn her panties from her hips.
“I’ll be gentle now,” he said, sliding his fingers along her wet slit.
“Don’t be.”
He licked his fingers, shiny with her arousal, one by one. “I’m going to eat you for a very long time. And you’re going to lie there and let me, now aren’t you?”
“I don’t believe I have much of a choice,” she lied, pulling on the metal handcuffs just to feel them bite into her skin. He was right, playing was so much fun. Every dirty fantasy she’d ever had could be indulged with Ian, guilt-free, because he allowed her to pretend it was all his doing, all his fault. And she was just the unfortunate woman who happened to be cuffed on a bed by such a merciless, gorgeous man. She grinned, and he flicked her clit with his fingers.
“Ow!” she gasped.
“This might hurt a bit too,” he said, rubbing lubricant over the length of the butt plug, “but I think you like a little pain. You’re dripping all over the bed.”
Heat rose up from her breasts to her cheeks, because he was right.
The tip of the plug pressed against her asshole, and she tensed automatically.
“Breathe,” he told her. “Let me in.”
She cried out as he pushed the plug past her anal sphincter, filling her.
“Good girl,” he said, and she paused, feeling the alien sensation of having an object inside of her. Her asshole felt like it was on fire.
Ian spread her knees farther apart and settled himself between her legs, holding her thighs open with his large hands. He lapped at her juices, sucking her clit into his mouth.
Oh my. The pleasure mingled with the pain he’d just given her, entwined together in an exquisite feeling unlike anything she’d experienced before.
She closed her eyes and relaxed, enjoying herself during oral sex for the first time in her life. With her previous lovers, she felt like it was a bargaining chip that men used to exchange for sexual favors from her. She certainly couldn’t climax from their half-hearted attempts, drawing the alphabet on her clitoris with their tongues, if they could find her clit at all.
But knowing that Ian had been fantasizing about having her tied up and being able to eat her out for as long as he wanted…well, that made her—
“Oh, my God, don’t stop,” she moaned, her climax peaking.
“Stop?” Ian laughed, his words vibrating against her pussy. “I haven’t even started.”
He ignored her cries of protest as he continued licking her, sucking her, through her first orgasm and finally past a third—at which point she
was breathless from coming so hard, so many times, with no break.
“Please,” she begged. “Fuck me. Fuck me, I need you inside me.”
She heard the rip of foil and the flutter of the condom wrapper, and then he held himself over her, staring into her eyes.
“Oh, I’ll fuck you alright.”
With that, he thrust himself deep inside her, filling her pussy completely. With the plug still in her ass, her inner muscles clamped tightly around him, milking his cock. His thickness touched every nerve ending inside, simultaneously hitting her g-spot and some other spots that should probably also be named if they weren’t already. The force of his cock gliding in and out of her promised to deliver an earth-shattering climax.
The handcuffs restrained her from raking her fingernails down his back the way she wanted to, to give him a taste of the exquisite pleasure-pain he inflicted upon her with each pounding thrust.
Her scent lingered on his mouth and he kissed her with a primal fierceness that matched his fucking. She licked his lips, tasting herself.
He pulled the plug out of her ass, and she screamed and came so hard she nearly bucked him off of her, but he held tight and rode her through her climax. Her head snapped forward with the intensity of the sensation.
“Fuck me, fuck me, please Sir, fuck me,” she gasped, scarcely aware she was speaking at all. Everything was sensation, and pleasure, and pain, and Ian. Especially Ian.
When he finally came inside her, she felt his cock pulsate as the force of his come hit the condom. He collapsed on top of her, pressing his lips to the pounding carotid pulse in her neck.
“I don’t want to have to miss the sex,” she whispered.
“And I don’t want to miss you.”
Tomorrow. Tomorrow she’d find out if she could integrate her life with Ian’s world, and vice versa. If he still wanted to be with her after she’d shed any pretense of being vanilla or a “nice” girl…
The conundrum circled through her mind. He’d dated her three years ago when she was the vanilla nice girl, but broke up with her because his sexual needs weren’t met. Now that his needs were being met as a Dom, he wouldn’t date the girls he played with because they didn’t fit his definition of a “good girl,” even if he protested that fact. Quite simply, he hadn’t dated anyone since he’d left her, and he’d had plenty of subs to choose from.
Would he still respect her as an equal if she was submissive to him in the bedroom? His muscular arms around her felt so right. Like home. She didn’t want to have to miss him either.
Chapter Seven
‡
Grace used a vacation day so she could drive over to the studio during regular shooting hours. If she didn’t use her allotted vacation days, she’d lose them, after all, just like she lost them last year. It amounted to her working for her asshole of a doctor for free. That and the anticipation of what lay ahead kept her from feeling too much guilt over playing hooky from the doctor’s office.
She entered the unlocked door without knocking, closing it quietly behind her. From the looks of the activity on the set, they were setting up a shot with Nikki and filming all of the set-up as part of the new video.
Ian probably wouldn’t even notice she walked in, since she’d been so discreet about it. Still, a pang of jealousy hit her as she saw him working.
Ian laughed and flirted with Nikki as he walked around her naked body, securing her ankles and wrists to the spanking bench. She smiled back at him, wiggling her ass as if to tease him.
Grace stifled the impulse to roll her eyes. But at least she knew Ian playing the role of Dom to Nikki didn’t mean he wanted to be with Nikki, not like how he seemed to want to be with Grace. Although it wasn’t as if they were an official couple. Or were they—could they ever be?
Only one way to find out.
And now she had front row seats to watch Ricardo’s crew video-taping Ian as he dripped hot candle wax in very pretty splatters all over Nikki’s back. She arched her back as the drops of wax hit her skin, as if to try and get away from the sensation even though she was tied up and at Ian’s mercy.
At Ian’s mercy. God, why did Grace want that too? She should be getting upset watching him play with another woman, and instead Grace found herself getting more and more aroused. She could imagine what it would feel like to have the drips of hot wax fall on her skin and to be forced to endure it, and she knew if it were her tied to that bench instead of Nikki, she’d be so wet her desire would be evident even on video.
Watching Ian work was different from watching the porn downloads at home, because this time, she could focus on him and not the girl. How his brow furrowed with concentration as he planned and executed each erotic movement. How his eyes lit up with desire when the submissive bound before him moaned in pleasure-pain.
Did he want to be dominant in every aspect of a relationship? Grace didn’t think so, because he’d specifically told her that he was called Sir during a scene, and in the bedroom. To her that meant outside the bedroom he could be just Ian.
And did Grace want to date “just Ian” again? As in, be with him when he was her equal, a man she dated—not the man pinching her nipples or spanking her?
Absolutely, but she supposed she’d need more dates with him to find out if they could keep up this new arrangement of vanilla by day, kinky by night. Would he even want to go out with her again if she became just another actress on the porn site?
Maybe she should keep herself separate from his job. Shouldn’t show up on the set anymore, not even after hours. They could meet somewhere else.
But then she’d never know if he was only dating her for her comparative innocence. And innocent girls didn’t star in porn websites. If only he’d been open with her in the past, instead of leaving her…
But then I would have probably freaked out and left him. I wasn’t ready back then.
“Ahh, look who’s here,” Ricardo said, catching her eye.
Grace nodded politely, not wanting to interrupt the scene Ian and Nikki were doing, but apparently the audio was poor enough that if Ricardo spoke to her on the other side of the set it wouldn’t have too much of an effect on the taping.
“I thought you were scared off for good,” he said.
“I…I was. I figured I’d come watch a shoot before deciding if it’s something I could do,” she replied. It was sort of true.
“Give it a shot, if you don’t like it you can use your safeword, no harm no foul,” Ricardo urged.
Tempting. Very tempting. But it wasn’t the fear of having to use her safeword that kept her from jumping at the offer. What if Ian never wanted to date her again if she became—officially—one of the…not-so-nice girls?
That’s why she had to do. She didn’t want to date a man who wouldn’t be with her just for doing the same exact thing he was doing. It was a double standard she couldn’t allow to stand.
“Okay, I’m in.”
“Wonderful,” Ricardo said. “I’ll get the contract.”
Ian walked over after he’d finished his shoot with Nikki. Nikki was smoking topless in the corner with a very satisfied smile playing on her lips.
“Hey, Grace,” Ian said, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “A visit at work? What a pleasant surprise.”
The kiss threw her mentally for a moment. Did he always kiss women he knew on the cheek in greeting? Or was that just for her, now that they were dating? He didn’t sound upset that she was on the set, just surprised.
Ricardo came back with the paperwork. “Ian, you remember our nineteen-year-old virgin, Grace, right? She’s here to work. What do you want to do with her?”
The smile fell off of Ian’s handsome face and he turned to Grace. “I thought we agreed this wasn’t the place for you. That you don’t want to be on the internet on a porn website forever.”
Ricardo huffed. “So it was you who scared her off? Not cool, man, not cool.”
Ian ignored his boss and spoke to her as if she were the only person in th
e room, although at this point it was clear that everyone had stopped what they were doing so they could listen to the argument.
Grace’s pulse pounded in her ears. “I’m here because I want to know why you won’t date girls you work with. And if I do a video, I want to know if I’ll be deemed unacceptable as girlfriend material. Because if that’s the case, I don’t even need to do the shoot. I can just leave right now, and never see you again.”
Please, Ian, please prove to me how you really feel.
*
Ian forced himself to exhale slowly, to stay calm. Grace just didn’t get it. He didn’t have a double standard—at least, not anymore. After Grace took him to task for his thinking he realized he had to reanalyze everything. He’d never spent too much time thinking about it before, it was just one of those things. Girls who he tied up at work were sexy but not girlfriends, girls who he dated were nice but not sexy…or at least, not his personal type of sexy. That had been the reason he’d left her before.
But now he knew it was possible for the women he worked with to be more than just porn actresses. They could be in a relationship as well, because that’s what he wanted—to have his kink and have a life outside of it. But he couldn’t see any of the women he worked with as the sort of woman he could be in a real relationship with, because they weren’t…they weren’t Grace. Something about her was a game-changer, and he couldn’t put his finger on what it was.
“It’s not that you’d be unacceptable as girlfriend material, Grace.”
“Well?” she asked, staring up at him defiantly, making it clear for all to see that she was not submissive in the slightest outside of the bedroom. Or dungeon. “What is it then?”
“You’re a nurse. You’re not going to be happy with yourself a month from now, a year from now, whenever, if you do this.”
“So you’d still date me if I did a video with you?” she asked, challenging him.
Before he’d reunited with her, he’d have said no, because in his previous way of thinking, if a girl did a porn video then she wasn’t going to be interested in doing anything else, any normal stuff, like eating pancakes at midnight.
Make Me: Twelve Tales of Dark Desire Page 227
