“I’m with the singer,” Grace walked past the restaurant hostess to sit alone at the bar close to the stage.
Grace ordered soda water. She needed a clear head to win back her woman and then go and find her man.
It was about time they both knew how much she loved them.
Sienna
“You have a fan,” Tony whispered as the song ended, motioning to the bar. “Striking blonde with legs to her arm pits. Either she is here for you or I’m hoping I’ve found the next Mrs.”
“You’re welcome to her. From what I understand, you are more her type these days.”
“Sia, as much as I’d like to take her backstage, she didn’t come here for me. How about we wrap up this set and then you hear her out.”
“Fine.”
Tony changed up the play list to ballsy, belt-them-out blues songs about moving on and not being taken for granted. Each song a not so subtle message to Grace who leant against the bar in the same tight red bodycon dress she wore to the reunion. How dare she flaunt that dress.
She would never have finished the set without Tony helping her when she threatened to choke on her tears. When he turned the song into a duet, the crowd thought it was part of their act and cheered wildly as they left the stage.
“Tony,” he extended his hand to Grace, “You must be the charming young vixen who broke my girl’s heart.”
“Grace, evil vixen who wants her girl back,”
“Tony, don’t believe a word she says. When Grace turns on her smile it melts icebergs. Shame she can turn it off just as quick.”
Sienna saw the bar staff already eating out of Grace’s hand, the waitress watching intently and now Tony looked smitten.
“Why are you here – and wearing that.” Sienna waved her hand across the dress.
“I want a do-over”
“So do I, believe me, so do I.” Sienna forced her laugh, “Which day should I go back to – the day we first met and became friends or the day of our first kiss?”
“Babe, please can we go to our room.”
“No, I can keep my voice down if you can. Getting back to my do over – I want to go back to before the night you slept with your ex and if I can’t do that then I want to relive the moment when I found out you thought you were pregnant to him.”
Tony held her arm, “Sia, come on the night is over and we don’t have to be here any more.”
“Who is this ‘Sia’,” she flinched as Grace grabbed her arm, “Her name is Sienna and I screwed up. I’m here, wanting to tell her that I am sorry. I was confused, we were not in a good place and now I want her to understand that I don’t care about anything other than making everything right with us.”
Something about the tone made her stop. Sienna hadn’t heard total honesty from Grace for months. All her endearments given automatically, her kisses and love making either because they were expected or inspired by guilt. After all these years together, she deserved to give Grace a chance to end things with the truth.
“Tony, thanks but I think I need to finish this conversation in private,” she kissed him on the cheek, “Thanks, I needed this tonight.”
“You’ve got a great voice and we have a date tomorrow night.”
“I’ll be here.”
As she left the restaurant, for once she didn’t check to see if Grace was following. Right now, she wanted not to care.
Grace
Following Sienna into what should have been their room, Grace looked around, filled with awe and remorse. The honeymoon suite was aptly named. Decadent with everything a romantic couple could ever want. Flowers, a platter of half eaten treats, the bed turned down and their own courtyard with a spa.
“Sienna,” she cried, spinning Sienna around, holding her in her arms and pressing her lips until Sienna opened to her. “I love you. In the purest way, I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”
She almost fell against the table as Sienna pushed her away, yelling, “Am I supposed to be thankful – you love me. Wow! All these years I believed you and it was a lie until now?”
“I spoke to Seth,” again, pleading for understanding. Why couldn’t Sienna try and understand.
“Of course you did – how many times a day do you talk? Every morning I heard your phone tell you there was another text from him. Show me.”
“Sienna, don’t.”
“Show me your phone so I can read the texts.”
“But …”
“You want us to start again, then I think part of the clean slate is being totally honest. I want to see every message you two shared.”
“Here we go, ‘Good morning beautiful’, how sweet. ‘Miss you heaps’, ‘Can’t wait to be with you again’. Charming.” Grace caught the phone as Sienna threw it towards the bed.
“What do you want me to say,” her raised voice matching Sienna’s “I cheated. I had fantastic sex with my ex and wanted more. Those are the facts but there are other facts.”
“You mean it gets worse?”
“The facts are when I wake, I want to see your face. When I go to sleep, I want your legs wrapped around me. When I go grocery shopping I look for the ethically produced foods because I want you to be proud of me.”
“We have great sex, fantastic. Can you write me a reference for my next lover?” Grace followed Sienna to the courtyard and raised her voice even more to be heard over the sound of the spa.
“That is also a fact – our sex life is erotic and out of this world, our love life is amazing, and we are the best friends. The question is, are you going to give all of that up because you don’t want to forgive me.”
“Don’t you do that,” cried Sienna, “Don’t you blame our breaking up on me. It isn’t because I can’t forgive you, it’s because what you did was unforgiveable!”
She needed Sienna to understand her guilt and remorse, “I screwed around. I screwed up. I love you both and want a do over.”
“Nothing has changed – you want marriage and babies. Go back to your precious Seth who can give you both.”
“He can’t give me what you can.”
“I don’t care.” Sienna’s voice resigned and final. “I don’t want children – I never have. I thought I could live with being married because it was the only way to hold onto you.”
Finally, the opening Grace waited for, the anger subsided and only the hurt and pain remained.
“Let me love you, for this one weekend, allow me to show you how much you mean to me. At the end when we leave here, it will be your choice. We can go home and work out how to rebuild our life together or I’ll find somewhere else to live.” Cupping Sienna’s face in her hands, Grace’s eyes pleaded for acceptance.
“You hurt me.”
“Please, let me kiss it better.” This time as their lips met, Sienna didn’t push her away. Grace helped Sienna into the spa, removing their clothes under the water and allowing the bubbles to push them together.
Never had their love making been so sweet. Hours ago, Grace didn’t imagine she would ever hold Sienna in her arms again. Fingers and legs wrapped around each other, breast against breast.
“Oh, how I love you,” Grace said in between every kiss. For weeks, she had been the passive partner, not knowing where she wanted to be or who with. Now it was her turn to show Sienna how very much she loved to love her. She dove under water, gently biting Sienna’s nipple before coming back up for another kiss. Her hands massaged all around Sienna’s legs awaiting the invitation to go between them.
Kisses upon kisses, until Sienna relaxed and demanded her own form of justice. As Sienna’s passion started to match her own, Grace took the risk of teasing one hand in between her legs. Instead of pushing her away, Sienna moved her deeper inside. The bubbles all around tingled livened her senses, now she wanted every part of Sienna, her skin, her lips, her hair, her essence.
If it took the rest of her life, she would make sure Sienna never doubted her love again.
And as much as s
he loved Seth, she could never walk away from this woman, the question remained how could she possibly have them both in her life?
As she massaged one breast with one hand and the bud with her thumb, Sienna opened her eyes and cried out, “I love you, damn it, I still love you,” before crashing into Graces arms.
Sienna
One perfect weekend for two lovers.
“Something changed,” she rolled back after another climax.
“You like or don’t like?” Grace drew a figure eight around her breasts.
“I like, it seems more honest as if you aren’t trying to hide anything anymore,” Sienna hadn’t realized how much Grace had held back not only in bed but in their relationship.
“You said no secrets and no lies.”
“Yeah, well some of the secrets have been hard to hear.”
“Which ones?”
“You loving us both and wanting to live with him,” Grace admitted on their last night the pregnancy scare made her want to move to the country and raise a family. “I can’t see you giving up the city life to live in a boring town.”
“It doesn’t change us,” Grace rolled on top of her, kissing her nipples still tender from their weekend of pleasure. “When we get home, I want to go to Seth and try and make things right with him.”
“So, where does that leave us?” Sienna rolled her back to lying side by side.
“Babe,” Grace knew exactly where to touch her to melt every resistance, “We will be what you always wanted us to be – best friends with amazing benefits.”
Sienna didn’t have time to think about what that meant before Grace’s head was once again between her legs and her tongue and fingers worked together. Her senses already heightened, and it didn’t take much for her to be calling out and squeezing her legs, locking Grace to her as she came.
There had never been another woman before Grace – and would never be another woman for her – not now and not ever.
“My turn,” as she went to work on Grace, her body still inflamed by desire. As her tongue flickered across Grace’s bud causing Grace to tremor uncontrollably, her own legs parted again.
Grace didn’t need a stronger invitation. The harder Sienna’s fingers and tongue worked, the more Grace did the same. They were united and completely in sync. Sienna scratched at the “S” tattoo, so close to where her tongue liberated Grace from her senses.
Whatever Grace and Seth thought they had together, he would never know her girl the way she did.
Now it really was her turn again, Sienna lay back allowing Grace to finish what she started.
Seth
He had been about to go for a jog with Joe when Sienna dropped the bombshell on him. After his coffee with Grace, he drove up the coast, sleeping in his car for two nights. His days spent aimlessly walking up and down a beach – leaving as soon as other people arrived or got too close.
By Sunday afternoon, he was ready to go home, except the house looked too big and lonely. He built it with the hope of a family. Now the size of it mocked him.
He dropped his car and walked the couple of blocks to Joe’s house. They deserved an explanation.
The sun dropped behind the mountains and ever the good friend, Joanne organized Kyle to stay at a sleepover. Not that he was good company.
“How do you feel about Grace now,” of course it would be Joanne wanting him to explore his emotions – she tried for years to get him to talk it through and get over Grace.
“I hate her.”
“Really – do you hate her or what she put you through?”
“Aren’t they the same?”
“What do you think?”
“Joanna, I love you but back the fuck off.” He walked outside where Joe snuck a cigarette. “I thought you quit.”
“So does the lovely Joanne. We’ve got a ‘don’t ask and don’t tell’ policy happening now.”
“How’s that working for you.”
“You tell me – did you ever ask Grace how she felt about her girlfriend? Did you ever ask about their sex life or if she loved her?”
“You know you are being cruel.”
“What do you expect – I’ve been here for you every step of the way. She walked out of your life and you never got over her. She waltzed back in and smashed you to pieces. Did you ever ask the question, or did you have your own version of ‘don’t ask’?”
“I didn’t want to know.”
They looked up, concerned at the look on Joanne’s face as she came outside.
“You have a visitor.”
“Babe, I’m not expecting anyone – they can come back tomorrow.”
“Not you – Seth. Grace is here,” she shrugged, “What do I say?”
Grace
Grace intended to go to her mother’s house and try to contact Seth in the morning. At the last minute, she changed her mind and decided to see Jo.
“You have some nerve showing up here.”
“I need to talk to you and Joe, explain and ask how I can make Seth talk to me.”
“He’s outside with Joe now. Go back to the city and your girlfriend.”
“Please, at least ask if he will see me,” she called before Jo slammed the door in her face.
Five, ten almost twenty minutes passed as she waited on the doorstep, not knowing if he would ever agree to see her. The door opened again. “He’s outside on the deck.”
“Thanks,” Grace started to walk through the house when Joanne grabbed her arm harshly and hissed, “If there is a single part of you that is either unsure or doesn’t love him then turn around and walk away now. He deserves better than a lying, cheating, bitch messing with him.”
Grace rubbed her arm, “How about I promise to be honest with him and let him decide.”
He turned towards her, his sad eyes unable to meet hers.
Time stood still. All the words practiced in the car and while waiting outside disappeared. Faced with the man she loved, no words could convince him. Brushing past Joe who tried to stop her, she walked slowly to Seth, put her hands to his face and her lips to his.
She kissed him, until he started to lose his resistance. His lips opened to hers and then his arms slowly reached around her.
Oh, everything she wanted was in this man.
Only when his kisses became confident did she stop, “Take me home.”
“Where’s Darby?” she asked as they pulled up to the darkened house.
“Away on a football trip. Crazy kid, decides he wants to kick a football one day and a couple of months later he is on the representative team.”
“Sounds like he’s getting his life together,” Sienna pulled her suitcase out of the car.
“Here, let me get that,” as they went inside, he turned the lights on to show furniture overturned and design magazines thrown around.
“Burglary?” she asked.
“Over reaction. I found out someone kept a secret from me.”
“How can that someone ever make it up to you?” her nervous fingers intertwined with his. It was one thing to come back here and talk, another to move forward together.
“Is it over between the two of you or am I a comfort stop.”
Grace pressed her body to his, feeling his heart beat and his firmness grow. “Right now, I am all yours.”
He walked away, opening the doors allowing the cool night air to waft through. “I wish I could believe you.”
“Then don’t,” she said, coming up behind him, her hands around his chest. “Am I here with you now?”
He turned, “Yes, but …”
She stroked his chest, wanting to tear off his clothes but needing him to understand, “Then believe me in this moment. Tomorrow when I am here, believe me in that moment.”
“What about when you go back to the city.” It only took a few minutes to turn the kindling in the cast iron drum into flames casting shadows across their faces.
“That’s going to be harder,” he turned away and she held onto his fingers ag
ain. “How about I promise never to lie but never to throw it in your face.”
“So, you aren’t going to leave her.” He pulled away from her and shut the door as he went inside.
Grace kicked off her shoes and paced around the backyard, feeling the dewy grass between her toes. He hadn’t told her to leave but hadn’t asked her to stay.
When he returned, he carried a plate with sandwiches and two bottles of lemonade. “I assume you haven’t eaten.”
She shook her head, “I might not be pregnant, but I’ve still been feeling off color.”
“At least have something.” Seth took one of the single chairs.
Grace asked him questions about the merger between his business and his supplier and listened as he started to relax with her again. Once upon a time they had been friends, perhaps they could start that way again.
His eyes lit up as he talked about the staff who felt secure in the jobs.
“A couple of them recently bought houses and were scared the business would go under.”
“And now?” she asked.
“Everything is going well, I’m making sure all the staff realize we are solid and even those who were thinking of leaving have signed new contracts.”
Then he updated her on Darby, his eyes darkening when he told of the father’s court case.
“I’m looking into being his guardian permanently,” was it a challenge for her to run away from?
“What will he think about me being part of the package?”
She saw his face soften, “Is that the way it is now?”
“I’m not going anywhere,” this time she couldn’t stifle her yawn.
“Come on then, let’s get you to bed,” he pulled her out of the chair and dosed the fire. Holding hands, they closed the house for the night and stopped in the hallway. Seth’s room on the right, the spare room next door.
“You know, I’m only going to creep into your bed in the middle of the night,” she pulled off her shorts and bundled them onto the floor next to his hamper.
“Grace, I’m not going to be the guy on the side while you set up a love nest in the city with someone else.”
The Question Is Page 26
