Her heart raced, but she wouldn’t let her fears spin out of control again. “Just breathe.”
From outside she could hear movement, voices, and all sorts of interaction. She listened intently.
“Hold him steady,” someone yelled.
There was the sound of skin hitting skin.
“That’s for scaring the shit out of my girlfriend.” Leaper’s voice was low.
“I’m a rescuer,” shouted Tavi. “They’re calling me. The dolphins need me. Let me just swim with them and commune. I can speak their language. Why don’t you understand?”
“My girlfriend is in a hazmat shack, and you’re telling me that substance you had isn’t lethal?” Leaper’s voice sounded lethal, like a sharp blade cutting through the bullshit.
That’s my man. You go, Leaper! she thought.
“I didn’t know! Someone gave it to me. I thought the dolphins would just be a little calmer and easier to take out to sea,” Tavi shouted as he was led away. “I didn’t know! You have to believe me, I didn’t know.”
“Get him…the fuck…out of here,” growled Leaper.
Kerry heard the whole exchange. She anxiously looked around for something to put on. Paper gowns were not going to cut it, this close to the water. One wave and the gown would dissolve like a tissue.
The door opened abruptly and Leaper poked his head in. “I thought you might need this.” He handed her a change of clothes from her bag.
“Thanks,” she said, relieved. “I didn’t want to go out there naked.” Kerry took the bag from him and found some warm clothes.
His body blocked any view from the outside as she dressed. “Darling, I want to come in there and show my appreciation for all that beauty, but I’m guessing that having half of the Feds in San Diego listen to our foreplay might be a buzzkill.”
She laughed.
Leaper lifted both hands. “Not that I don’t want to, because I do.” His smile was soft and gentle, matching the tone of his voice. “You are so very beautiful.”
“Thanks,” she murmured. Heat rose in her cheeks.
“Uh, just out of curiosity, what was that stuff in the bottle?”
“Carfentanil,” she replied. “It’s flooding the black market, because it boosts the power of opioids. Drug cartels are sourcing it from overseas and using it to cut their heroin, but even a small amount is too much, and the death toll has been enormous. No one really understands how deadly this stuff is!”
“Damn. That’s messed up.” Leaper gave a low whistle. “Is there anything I can do to help you? Did it get on you?”
“No,” replied Kerry, shaking her head. “Leaper, this is all…so crazy and disturbing. Why here? Why…carfentanil? Who is this terrorist? Did he know that he was about to commit mass murder on one of our most important species? I’ve never been this close to an event of this magnitude. This wouldn’t have been a rescue—this would have been an act of terrorism.” Finally warm and dressed, she hugged Leaper tightly, grateful for his presence. Tears surprised her as they fell down her cheeks. “If that top had opened and the wind had caught one grain… Oh God, if it had touched you…” She choked.
She let the worry out and pulled herself together. Her shock and the talk of what-if must have made the tears spring from her like a fountain, but she wasn’t one given to emotional outbursts. Her mantra was empower and power through, show of strength over shrinking-violet syndrome. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” she said.
“Kerry, it’s okay. I get it. Trust me. Bad situations can hit you upside the head in unexpected ways. Just remember, you’re okay. We’re okay. The mammals are okay. We survived it. You’re my superhero lady. Who else grabs the evil mojo juice and runs into a hazmat facility?” He kissed the top of her head. “I’m proud of you. You think quickly on your feet. And Declan and I rounded up the bad guys, so the MPs have them in custody. Their night isn’t over yet, though. I’m sure at least two different government agencies will want to chat with them.”
Leaper opened the door wide and escorted her into the fresh air. She breathed deeply. It eased her, the smell of salt comforting and familiar.
“Hey, you can see them there, up near the office.” Leaper nodded in the direction of the terrorists.
She followed his motion. There they were…the group of terrorists. They looked nervous as they attempted to loudly talk their way out of their handcuffs. It didn’t look as if the military police were budging on that point.
“When I told them you dashed to hazmat, the MPs called Command, who requested the Coast Guard, the CDC, and a Terrorism Task Force from the FBI.” Leaper’s voice was matter-of-fact, as if he dealt with dramatic events every day.
She knew the authorities had handled worse. Something about that fact eased her further. The situation was in hand. Procedures would be followed. All she had to do was give her statement, and the authorities would take over.
“The Coast Guard’s Cutter from Naval Station San Diego is docked over there. I’m pretty sure someone from the CDC will arrive within the hour.” He craned his neck. “And I see gold letters. The FBI is here. So let’s get this chat over with. Ready?”
Kerry nodded.
As they walked, the moon slid out from behind the thick clouds, casting bright rays of light into the pens. Seeing the dolphins moving around was a godsend. They exuded peaceful vibes.
She looked at Leaper, and her heart sped up. She smiled at the realization that she loved him. It was as clear as the bright moon overhead. Though the clouds threatened to slide back into place, she didn’t care. There was clarity now, both in the night sky and in her own mind. There was no cynical voice to point out her doubts. There were only two very clear facts: Leaper had risked his life for her and she would risk hers for him. Love was a fierce emotion, its protective instinct made even sharper by the possibility of loss.
Leaper took her hand and tenderly kissed the back of it. It pulled Kerry out of her reverie. She smiled broadly at him. “Thanks.”
“Of course. I have you, and you have me. Team dynamics, remember?”
“Your Teammate—that’s a big honor.” She bumped her shoulder into his. “Speaking of… Where’s your other Teammate?”
“Declan? He went home. They’ll talk to him in the morning.” He whispered in her ear, “He was like a big kid when we took those activists down. He enjoyed the action. When he learns about the substance, though, it’ll hit him hard. They live on the water. He and his daughter play in the bay almost every day—kayaking, swimming, canoeing, sailing, tubing…”
“Yeah, that’s what shook me up so hard, that innocents would be killed. It’s still a lot to take in.”
“I agree. Now, let’s wrap this up and go home.”
Straightening her shoulders, she pursed her lips and mentally prepared herself. The good news was that if the camera on the man’s head had survived the takedown, the entire event was on film. This would probably be one of the few times in history that cameras were a plus.
Kerry and Leaper walked toward the two waiting FBI agents who stood on the other side of the locked, chain-link gate. Their badges were out and their jackets flapped in the breeze. She knew that once the world learned about the blue bottle of carfentanil, this place would be swarming with even more personnel. This would be seen as a terrorist event. The Navy was going to have a hard time containing the media, once they learned about it. And there was no doubt that the entire Marine Mammal group would be moving locations again, to someplace even more secure. But that wouldn’t be so bad. She was ready for a change of location.
This had been one of the scariest nights of her life. Tonight’s events would haunt her for a long time and most likely affect the entire Marine Mammal Program, like the ever-widening ripples when a pebble is dropped into the water. But she had courage, and she’d wear that bravery like armor.
Kerry pull
ed open the gate and walked through. Leaper was right behind her, and she knew she could lean on him. But for now, she was going to stand up and make her voice heard, starting with the fact that carfentanil needed to be banned. There were other drugs that could be used on large animals, safer ones. No one needed this event to be repeated.
“Gentlemen, I’m Dr. Kerry Hamilton. Let’s get started. I came to the docks to work, and my boyfriend and his Teammate stopped by. Little did I know that the Marine Mammal area was being invading by individuals determined to release our dolphins, which, for the record, can leave anytime they want by simply jumping the edge of the pen. These invaders, for lack of a better word, could have endangered the lives of our dolphins, because some of them require medication to stay alive and healthy. The invaders had malicious intent, as they intended to release a deadly toxin into the water that could have killed marine and human life. Questions?”
The federal agents’ mouths dropped open in surprise. A variety of voices rose, wanting to know more. Yep, this was just the reaction she’d thought they’d have.
* * *
The air in Leaper’s home was stifling. Kerry craved fresh air. She couldn’t remember this small place ever feeling so closed off and confined, and she tugged at the neckline of her shirt. Glancing at the clock, she knew she would only be getting a few hours of sleep before she made her way back to work, but she didn’t care. Being away from the base for even a short time was a reprieve. The FBI and the CDC were still there, and some of the brass, as well as the director of the program, were sticking around too. She needed a breather, a little time to regain her equilibrium.
So why was she so crabby, like she needed to move or act on something, and yet so exhausted? Was it the adrenaline rush? Could she still have one? Maybe she wasn’t fit for company, but she couldn’t bear hurting Leaper with her moodiness. Yet she was loath to leave here.
Her eyes tracked Leaper as he moved about the room. Clothes spilled out of his hamper, and several pairs of pants hung on the back of a chair. Had he always been this messy, or was she seeing evidence of it for the first time?
Music grew in volume as Louis Armstrong sang “All of Me.” Normally, she loved that song, but at this moment, it was fraying her last nerve. Why was that? Didn’t she want someone to take “all” of her?
She gritted her teeth against the song, the banging cabinet doors, the shoes being tossed nonchalantly into the closet and slamming against the back wall before they fell, and, to top it off, the squeak of the bathroom door. When she couldn’t stand it anymore, she ground out in an angry voice, “Stop! Just stop, please. I can’t take it anymore.”
Leaper froze. “What?” He turned toward her and came to the bed. Getting on his knees, he reached for her.
She batted his hands away. She couldn’t deal with being touched at this moment. “I need some space.”
“Do you want me to take you home?” His eyebrows were drawn in tightly, and he looked concerned. She wanted to smooth those lines away, and at the same time, she wanted him gone. She didn’t know why she was so frustrated. “Should I leave?” he asked, his expression growing more puzzled. “C’mon, talk to me. I know you had a rough night.”
“That’s an understatement,” she mumbled grumpily.
“Right. Ah, I believe you’re having a reaction, a type of posttraumatic-stress-induced moment.” His tone was firm, but soft. Thank God he wasn’t placating her. She would be kicking his butt right now. Of course, what he was saying rang true. Emotionally, she was very out of sorts.
“How so?” Kerry asked.
“Your fight-or-flight response was triggered, and nothing’s turned it off yet. You’re still running and fighting, and now you’re turning those emotions on me.” He tapped his finger on his chest. “You can take it out on me. I’m tough! Though I’d prefer if it didn’t become a habit. It might be a teensy bit hard on my fragile ego to handle it daily.”
“Fragile, my ass,” she scoffed.
“And what a beautiful tush it is,” he quipped.
“Thanks,” she said flatly.
“Kerry, what can I do to help? Talk to me or don’t. Whatever works for you is fine with me. I can even leave you here alone, if that makes you feel better. I can go sleep in the boat or at the Bachelor’s Quarters on base—”
She touched her finger to his mouth to silence him. “Thank you. I don’t know what to say. How do you handle it?”
He nodded and opened his arms. “If I’m lucky, I can hold someone special. If not, I work out, like swimming and surfing, until I’m too exhausted to feel anything. Sometimes, I talk. There’s no right or wrong method.”
She crawled into those big strong arms, and her body relaxed slowly. She didn’t know how much time passed, but at some point she started talking. “The marine mammals… I’m so glad the dolphins are accounted for and safe. This event didn’t seem to rattle them. The techs checked them over, and another vet stopped by to double-check. Just receiving their texts made me feel better. But…but…” Her lips quivered. “I still feel like I failed them, because I didn’t protect them from strangers getting onto the docks in the first place. These invaders… It’s like they came into my home and violated my safety. I’ve always been safe at work, and now I’m going to be searching the water constantly, looking for the enemy. I’m angry.”
Leaper held tight. “Kerry, you have every right to feel violated. But remember, security isn’t your job. Healing and helping is your forte. You can’t blame yourself over responsibilities that aren’t yours. Also, the Feds said that the activists, these invaders, had a very specific note with directions and a map. It was a planned endeavor and most likely it was an inside job. How could you have known about it? It could have been a disgruntled employee, someone who’s antimilitary, or someone who doesn’t believe in the program. Few souls are aware of the marine mammal rescues the Foundation sponsors or that you promote longevity and a family atmosphere for the creatures. Regardless, no creature or human was hurt, and everyone is accounted for. The base is locked up tight and has extra security. No one is getting in there now. So what do you think about that?”
She nodded her head. What could she say?
“It’s going to take a while for this emotion to process. I’ve heard that the more you talk about it, the more it’ll loosen its grip.” He sighed. “Dang, I sound like a shrink. Sorry, I don’t mean to…unless it helps.”
He was right. This was going to take a while to work through. She wasn’t the type of person to sit and fret. She was more fearless warrior than stagnant weeper. She acted.
Her eyes met his. “Fight,” she murmured.
“What?”
His arms rocked her gently.
She pushed out of his embrace. It was as if a flip had switched inside her. Her eyes lifted to his. “I’m going to fight. I’m not going to let criminals stop me. If I have to choose between being afraid and being fierce, then I choose the latter.”
Leaper’s mouth pulled slowly into a grin. “That’s my lady.” He lifted one of her hands, opened her fist, and placed a kiss inside, and then did the same thing with the other one. “When I’ve had to face fear, look it in the eye, and tell it to go take a flying leap, I’ve asked one thing of myself—to be calm. When you’re calm in the face of the unknown, you can see everything clearly, endless possibilities and outcomes, and the best moves to make. So next time you get scared, try to calm yourself and see how it changes your experience.”
“Thank you. I will.” Kerry bit her lip. “Along those lines, I have to say something. This is really important to me. I’ve been scared to tell you how I feel. I have to be true to myself and to my heart.” She leaned toward him until their faces were inches apart. “If I had died, or you had, without telling you this important thing… Leaper, I love you.”
He smiled broadly. His eyes were warm, liquid pleasure. “Good choice. I’d rathe
r that emotion than hate.”
Closing her eyes, she leaned her forehead against his. A wave of joy filled her heart and a surge of adrenaline filled her body. “I know you love me.” She grabbed the front of his shirt and nudged his body with hers. “Not the random words that people string together to get laid or whatever. You know that I’m the one, and no other person can fill those shoes. It’s only me.”
“Yes,” he said softly. “I admit it. You’re right. I love you, Kerry.”
The words were drawn out slowly and sweetly, and they stuck in her mind, obliterating all other thoughts. Waves of joy swamped her, and she grinned at him.
His arms crushed her, holding her body so tightly, she could barely breathe. “Every day, I can hardly wait to have you in my arms again,” he said. “The moment you leave them, I wish you were near.”
Her hands were trapped between them, but she didn’t care. She could feel his breath against her neck and hair. The caress of his hands along her body was exhilarating, and his message, those three little words, rang loudly in her heart and head. Not the “you’re right” part, though that was nifty to hear, but “I love you.” She’d waited her whole life for a declaration that made her melt inside.
“It’s like I tell the recruits: Choose your life and career carefully,” Leaper said. “Do not make decisions lightly. Be in Special Operations because you cannot imagine any other way to live. Be with a partner because you can’t imagine living without them. I…I cannot imagine living my life without you.”
Tears streamed down her face, dripping onto his shirt. “Me neither. Damn, I didn’t think I had any moisture left in my body.” She reached up to brush his cheek and felt moisture there too. “You, too! Aw, man. What now?”
He stood, picked her up, swept her into his arms, and carried her to the bed. Lying down beside her, he said, “I’m going to make love to you. I’m going to praise every part of your anatomy and listen to you come before I enter you.”
The Power of a SEAL Page 24