by Zara Chase
She felt a sudden urge to leave Impulse, put it all behind her, and let her grandfather’s secret remain buried. She felt safe here, but at the same time knew she was in danger, the feeling too strong to be ignored. Even so, she wouldn’t go, at least not until she’d spoken with this Davina lady who claimed to know something about Gramps. Her curiosity was piqued and she’d never forgive herself if she chickened out now.
Nicole must have drifted off to sleep. A sleep that was interspersed with vivid images of piercing amber eyes housed in the faces of beautiful felines who were about to devour her whole. She awoke when dawn had barely broken, her body bathed in perspiration, the sheet twisted around her body like a straightjacket. She knew she wouldn’t get back to sleep and so took a long shower instead, feeling refreshed as the water pounded over her head, cleansing her skin but not succeeding in washing away the turbulent and conflicting thoughts tumbling through her brain.
About to pull on one of her caftans, Nicole saw a pair of skinny designer jeans draped across the bottom of her bed, along with a selection of tank tops, all in her size.
“What the…”
Her first reaction was anger. How dare they! Her ire was quickly replaced with an overwhelming desire to wear something figure hugging and fashionable. They’d obviously gone out of their way to shop for her, just as they’d said they would the previous day. She just hadn’t believed them at the time. Now she wondered how they’d managed it without her knowing. It wasn’t as if they’d had a lot of spare time. Oh well, everything about this place was odd, and in the greater scheme of things their shopping arrangements hardly signified.
With a defiant toss of her wet hair, Nicole pulled the jeans on, not surprised to find that they were a perfect fit. She dithered over the tops, unable to remember when she’d last spent any time enjoying the clothes she wore. Grinning with sheer devilment, she selected an amber top that exactly matched the color of the guys’ eyes, slipped her feet into flip-flops, and headed for the kitchen. It was early. The guys wouldn’t be up yet, but against all the odds, she was ravenous. She’d make breakfast for them all. Perhaps even serve it to them in bed and see where that led.
Wondering where this new, liberated Nicole had sprung from, she wandered into the kitchen, expecting to have it all to herself. But both men were already there, drinking coffee and talking in subdued voices. They whistled when they saw her attire, which made her blush. Hell, she was too old to blush and she hated not being able to control her reaction.
“Thanks for the clothes,” she said crisply. “I’ll pay you back.”
“No you won’t,” the said together.
“Our treat,” Pascal added alone.
“Well then, at least let me make you breakfast.”
They shared a glance and then nodded. “Do your worst,” Kai said. “Anything will be an improvement on Pascal’s cooking.”
“Someone’s asking for a spanked bottom.”
Kai grinned. “You offering?”
Nicole actually managed to laugh at their banter as she made herself at home in their well-equipped kitchen and rifled through the fridge, looking for ingredients and inspiration. Now that she knew what they were, she was grateful they hadn’t actually fucked her. She wasn’t sure that would have been entirely appropriate, which is presumably why they held back. She no longer looked upon their actions as insulting but considerate. Still, it was a shame she’d never know them in the biblical sense. They’d awoken dormant feelings that seemed reluctant to return to their box. Never mind. She’d managed well enough before she met Pascal and Kai. When she returned to England she’d do so again with the help of her trusty vibrators and vivid imagination—an imagination which had been broadened thanks to her brief contact with these two.
“Here we go,” she said, serving them eggs Benedict, having made the Hollandaise sauce from scratch.
The guys took mouthfuls, closed their eyes, and groaned in unison. “That’s orgasmic!” Kai sighed.
“How many years can you stay with us?” Pascal asked, winking at her.
Nicole laughed with them, pleased to have…well, pleased them. She didn’t ask any more questions about their odd lifestyle and deliberately avoided all contentious subjects. They appeared to do the same thing and the meal passed without Nicole having to face any of the demons lining up inside her head, waiting for their five minutes of fame.
“All set?” Pascal asked after he and Kai had cleared up the kitchen and set the dishwasher to work. She liked that about them. They never left their kitchen in a mess which, to a professional like Nicole, would be a hanging offence. “We’ll drive you over to Davina’s in the golf cart.”
“We can walk if it isn’t far.”
“Better drive and save your energy.”
“Okay, just give me a moment.”
Nicole returned to her room, splashed water over her face, pulled a brush through her hair, and took several deep, calming breaths. She stared at her reflection and waited for her insides to stop roiling. This was it. She could do it. She’d faced the guys’ revelations the night before without freaking out—just—so she could withstand anything this lady had to say to her about her grandfather.
Couldn’t she?
Pascal and Kai both accompanied her to Davina’s house. The drive was a short one, made in terse silence. They pulled up outside a neat town house on the opposite side of the thin spit of land.
“This is it,” Pascal said. “We’ll let you go in alone and come and get you when you’re done.”
“How will you know when that is?”
“We’ll know,” they said together.
“Okay then, I guess this is it.” She drew in as much air as her restricted lung capacity permitted. “The moment of truth.”
Kai touched her hand. Pascal ran his fingers down the curve of her face and rested one against her lips. She was filled with the heady need to nip at it but managed to quell the impulse. Now wasn’t the time. There probably never would be a right time and she’d best get used to the idea.
“Good luck, sweetheart,” Pascal said softly, casting one considering look at her features before leaving her standing on the sidewalk and driving away.
The door opened before Nicole could knock. A lady who looked to be in her thirties—an attractive lady with an open smile and compelling blue eyes—appraised her with a friendly smile and obvious interest.
“Nicole, come in, my dear. I’ve been expecting you for years.”
Nicole widened her eyes. “You know who I am?”
“Even if Rafe hadn’t told me to expect you, I’d have recognized you anyway. You have your grandfather’s eyes.”
“Really?”
Nerves and a sense of foreboding deprived Nicole of the ability to string a coherent sentence together, leaving her feeling clumsy and maladroit. Now that she was here she wondered if it was such a good idea. Her grandfather’s secret must be pretty potent if he’d chosen not to share it with her all these years. She’d always thought the two of them knew everything there was to know about one another. Opening this Pandora’s box would have consequences, of that she was well aware. But Gramps had wanted her to know and she didn’t have it in her to deny his dying request.
“Oh yes, it’s the first thing I noticed about you when I opened the door. It was like turning the clock back.” Nicole followed Davina into a neat lounge. “Now do sit down and make yourself comfortable, then we can have a nice long chat and catch up. Can I get you anything to drink first? Coffee, iced tea, soda?”
“Just water, please.”
Davina returned with water for them both and set the glasses on the table between them, along with a plate of cookies. She then sat across from Nicole and offered her a sympathetic smile. “I was so sorry to hear about your grandfather. It must have been a terrible time for you.”
“Yes, thank you, it was.”
“Now, I expect you have questions. I know Pascal and Kai have told you what we actually are here in Impulse. It
’s hard for you to get your mind round, I expect.”
Nicole managed the ghost of a smile. “It’s not the sort of thing you hear every day.”
“No, indeed. Even us shifters struggle to accept what we are sometimes, especially when we’re young and feel we’re missing out on things you humans take for granted.”
“Trust me, it’s not all a bed of roses for us either.”
“No, we always hanker after what we can’t have, I suppose. It’s both human and shifter nature. One thing we have in common.”
“I assume you met my grandfather when you were young.” Accounting for your wistful expression and obvious regrets.
“Yes.” Davina met Nicole’s gaze and held it. “Your grandfather was not only a wonderful man but the love of my life.”
Nicole had expected something of the sort and merely smiled. “How did the two of you meet?”
“It was fifty years ago. I was rebelling, like most young shifters do.”
“Pascal said he tried to leave Impulse but was drawn back to it by his ties here.”
“Yes, I remember that. I’m older than he is.”
Nicole smiled. “You don’t look it.”
“Ah, my dear, looks can be deceiving.” She took a sip of her water and nibbled at a cookie she obviously didn’t want, presumably playing for time as she decided what to say. “I majored in English and did an exchange year at a British university.”
“Gramps never went on to higher education. He left school at fifteen, so you wouldn’t have met on campus.”
“No, we had rooms in the same boarding house in south London. We met on the landing, both heading for the shared bathroom.” She smiled. “He let me go first and was still waiting outside when I finished my shower so he could ask me out to supper. The problem was that he didn’t have much money. So we bought a bag of chips, sat on a bench overlooking the Thames and shared them. It was freezing cold, but the most romantic date I’d ever been on. There was a connection between us, you see. I felt it at once. It was so strong, so compelling, that I started to think about not returning to the States—to Impulse. Your grandfather had no money, no prospects, nothing to offer me, but I didn’t care. I was in love, you see.”
“That’s so sweet,” Nicole said softly, leaning her face in her cupped hand, enthralled.
“We were inseparable for the remaining six months of my time in London and I spent a lot of time listening to your grandfather’s plans for the future. He was determined to make money, make something of himself, and just kind of assumed I’d be there with him.”
“Did you…I mean, were you—”
“Did we make love?” Davina smiled. “In every way possible, except for having full-on sex.”
Just like me with Pascal and Kai. “Why not go the full way, if you were in love? I know we’re talking fifty years ago, but people were sexually liberated by then, weren’t they?”
“I’m a shifter,” she said.
“Yes, so what?”
Davina looked at her askance. “You don’t know, do you?”
“Know what?”
“Ask Pascal and Kai,” she said hastily. “It’s not for me to tell you that.”
“But it’s clearly important and I want to know.”
“It’s not germane to my history with your grandfather,” she said, making it obvious that she wasn’t going to share whatever it was with her. “Suffice it to say that Charlie didn’t push me, but I think he sensed there was something different about me. We’re never supposed to tell anyone what we are, unless a human agrees to mate with us. Then, obviously, they have to know and are willing to keep the secret.”
“What if they’re not?”
“Then we have the ability to strip their memories.”
“Ah, that explains why you haven’t been outed before now. I was wondering about that.”
“Exactly.”
“But you told Gramps?”
“Yes. I was conflicted, torn between my duty as a shifter and my love for your grandfather.”
“Couldn’t the two of you have married, or mated, or whatever it is that you call it and lived in Impulse?”
Davina shook her head. “No. I had to mate with another shifter.”
“There are some human mates in Impulse.”
“Yes, but I was required to be with a fellow-shifter.” She smiled. “I don’t expect you to understand, but these things are preordained. He was my soul mate, but not a shifter, so that was that. If I’d gone against the shifter code, I would have lost my power to shift and—”
“And your extended life.” Nicole tried not to feel offended. “You chose that over my grandfather?”
“Not the extended life. Sometimes I look upon that as a curse. But losing the power to shift.” She shrugged. “It’s hard to explain to a nonshifter, but can you imagine having such strong instincts that they govern everything you do?”
“Yes, surprisingly enough, I think I probably can.”
“I often think it must be a bit like a gay person trying to deny their sexuality, and that’s how it would have been for me. I’d have strong urges to shift but wouldn’t be able to do it. It would have been a living death.”
“I see.”
“I doubt whether you do, but your grandfather did. He encouraged me to come home and mate with another shifter, even though it broke his heart, and mine, to come to the only decision it was possible to reach.”
“That’s just the sort of noble gesture that Gramps would have made,” Nicole said, conscious of tears flooding her eyes.
“Oh yes, he was noble, and good, and principled.” Davina sighed. “One in a million.”
“He begged me on his death bed to come to Impulse. Is that what he wanted me to know? About your relationship, I mean.”
“Possibly.”
“What I don’t understand…well, one of the many things I don’t understand, is where he made so much money and why he invested it in Impulse’s hedge fund.”
“Ah, I can help you there. My family was wealthy. My parents were killed by rogue shifters and left me well provided for.”
“But you still froze your arse off eating chips out of doors on a winter’s night?”
Davina laughed. “Can you imagine your grandfather letting a woman pay?”
A smiled tugged at Nicole’s lips as she slowly shook her head. “No, I guess not.”
“Anyway, when your grandfather and I reached the agonizing decision to go our separate ways, he was working as a floor runner for an investment brokerage in London.” Davina smiled. “It was the lowest of lowly positions, but he was determined to work his way up and make something of himself through the stock market. He already had a knack for noticing which stocks were a good investment. He listened to the senior brokers talk, learned which ones knew their stuff, but had no money of his own to invest. So, as a parting gift, I made him take some of my inheritance and use it to get started. He didn’t want to, but I insisted.”
“Ah, so that’s why he never let on that he had money.”
“Yes, I expect it is. It was the only link he still had to me, you see.”
“Did you ever see him again?”
“No, the only way to get through the pain was to make a clean break of it. But I never forgot him, and he obviously didn’t forget me. When Kai and Pascal launched the hedge fund, I heard that he’d invested a large sum in it, so that…”
“It was his way of repaying you, making sure Impulse thrived and letting you know you were still in his heart.” Nicole, emotional and on the verge of tears again, sniffed inelegantly. “I think that’s one of the most romantic stories I’ve ever heard.”
Davina reached forward and clutched Nicole’s hand. “You’re a credit to him, my dear. I think he must have loved you very much.”
“It’s so sad that you couldn’t be together.”
“He was always in my heart, and I guess I must have been in his.”
“Well, I’m glad I know, but he could have writte
n it all down for me. I wonder why he wanted me to come here in person.”
“Oh, I think you already know the answer to that one.”
Nicole blinked. “I’m not sure that I do.”
“Your grandfather was wise, and even when he was young and reckless there was still a sensible streak running through him. He probably saw something in you that he saw in himself when he was your age. You’re not happy, are you?
“Well, I—”
“People’s destinies are to be found in the most unlikely places Always remember that.” Davina stood up. “Now, it’s time for you to go. Pascal and Kai are here. But do come back and see me again. You’re bound to have more questions.”
“I’d like that, but I expect I’ll leave soon. There’s nothing to keep me here now.”
Davina kissed Nicole’s cheek, treating her like a long-lost daughter, or was that just wishful thinking on Nicole’s part? She instinctively liked this woman who’d sacrificed her own happiness to be true to herself. Being with her made Nicole feel closer to a grandfather whom she wasn’t yet ready to part with.
“That’s where you’re entirely wrong,” Davina said as she opened the front door.
Nicole probably looked as confused as she felt. “Whatever do you mean? There’s nothing for me here.”
Davina’s smile implied she knew something Nicole didn’t. “You’ll figure it out yourself,” she said, patting Nicole’s hand. “Just give it some time.”
Chapter Fourteen
“How did it go?” Pascal examined her face for clues, worried that she’d be freaked and unable to handle the fallout, fiercely protective of their mate-to-be’s feelings. “You look pale. Are you okay?”
