The Cool School

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by Glenn O'Brien


  Man, I know what I’m doing! I’m swinging instead of standing still, I’m racing with a racing age, I’m handling 17 things at once and I’m scoring with them all! Life’s too wild today, sonny, to worry about the fate of the race or private morality or nun-like delicacies of should-I or should-I-not; anyone with brains or even imagination is a self-driven marauder with the wisdom to know that if he hustles hard enough he can have a moat full of gravy and a penthouse-castle high over life’s East River! I’m bartering my neuroses for AT&T (not crying over them to Beethoven’s Ninth like you, you fake holy man!) and bemoaning my futile existence with Mumms Extra Dry and the finest hemp from Laredo and my new Jackson Pollock and my new off-Broadway boff and my new book and my new play and my new pad and this TV show they’re gonna build around me and—Jesus, I’ve got it made!

  . . . . while down below the lusting average man and woman sweats in jealousy at the sight of these dexedrine angels, the very inspiration of what he and she can become if only they too can put that last shred of shame behind them and swing, extrovert yourself, get with it, make that buck, make that chick, make that poem, make this crazy modern scene pay off, O my heart, so I too can sink my teeth in the sirloin and wear the pearls of hell!

  Views of a Nearsighted Cannoneer, 1961

  Del Close

  (1934–1999)

  Del Close was an actor first, coming up in a St. Louis troupe that included Mike Nichols and Elaine May. In New York he did stand-up, acted on Broadway in The Nervous Set, and in 1959 cut a comedy record called How to Speak Hip. It was hipster self-criticism, goofing on the nouveau hep, and it was a big hit. Even as satire it converted many of its audience to the groovy pose. Close later went to Second City, directed The Committee theater troupe in San Francisco, rode with Ken Kesey’s Merry Pranksters, and was “house metaphysician” at Saturday Night Live. He’s best known as a mentor to Dan Aykroyd, John Belushi, John Candy, Chris Farley, Tina Fey, Bill Murray, Amy Poehler, Gilda Radner, and Harold Ramis.

  Dictionary of Hip Words and Phrases

  Ace: A dollar. Also, a friend. “I’m tight with him, he’s my ace buddy.”

  Action: What’s happening. “What’s shakin’ baby, where’s the action?”

  Axe: Musical instrument. Also, any tool with which you make your living.

  Amp: Ampule.

  Amphetamine: A powerful stimulant.

  Amphetamine head: Habitual user of amphetamine. They are noted for their never ending stream of chatter, their misguided energy, and their unreliability.

  Baby: A friendly form of address used for persons of either sex.

  Bad: Good. “Monk blows bad piano, man.” Also, occasionally, bad. “He’s a bad face, man, and I don’t want him around.”

  Bad News: A dreary, unpleasant, or dangerous person. “Here comes Mr. Bad News.”

  Bag: Very general term for set of circumstances, a complex of behaviour patterns, etc. “I’m going to Mexico to study the teachings of Gurdjeiff.” “Oh, you’re in that bag!”

  Ball: Pleasurable experience. “It was great, I had a ball.”

  Beatnik: A term coined by Herb Caen of San Francisco to describe the self-proclaimed members of the Beat Generation living in the North Beach area. A much abused term, now mostly applied to teenage bohemians, or anything else that’s funny looking or whom you don’t happen to like. Similar to “Communist” in that respect.

  Beat, to: To steal. “He beat me for my short.” He stole my car.

  Behind: Under the influence of. “I get very goofy behind lush, so I don’t drink.” Also, as a result of: I’m very strung out behind no sleep.

  Bill: One hundred dollars.

  Blow: To play any musical instrument. “He blows bad guitar.” Also, to make: “My old lady blows nutty scrambled eggs.” Also, to lose: “Be here by 5:00 or you’ll blow the gig.” “I blew my watch.” I lost my watch.

  Boss: Very good. “That Mercedes is a boss short.”

  Box: Phonograph.

  Boxed: High, stoned.

  Bread: Money. “Lay some bread on me, baby, I’m up tight.”

  Bug: To annoy or irritate. “Don’t bug me, Jim.”

  Burned, to be: To be cheated or swindled. “What happened to that project in which we invested twenty dollars a piece?” “I’m sorry, boys. I got burned, what can I tell you.” Also: angry.

  Burn down: To create an atmosphere in which no “action” is possible. “Nothing’s happening on East 3rd Street, man, all those uncool people burned it down.”

  Bring down: A depressing person or thing.

  Busted: Arrested for a reason. “Charlie the Gizzard took a fall, man,—he got tapped in that big bust last June.”

  Cat: Male hipster.

  Changes, tough: hard times.

  Changes: Originally, musical chord changes. Now, refers to psychological or emotional changes. “Man, when you came through that door in that ape suit, I went through a terrible change.”

  Changes, to put through: To do purposeful violence to a person’s state of mind. To disorient. To startle and amaze. See “Put on” and “Riff.”

  Chick: Girl.

  Chops: Embouchure, or lips. Extended to mean any part of the body used to play an instrument. A pianist’s chops are his hands. A tap-dancer’s chops are his feet. And his shoes are his axe.

  City: A suffix used for emphasis. “You went to the Elk’s meeting—what was it like?” “What can I tell you? It was Clyde city.”

  Clyde: An offensive square, a hick.

  Come down: To return to normal from a high.

  Come on, to: How one presents oneself. To say that someone “comes on strong” means that he has an overdeveloped personality. Also, to make sexual overtures. “So I was trying to sound her. But she said ‘Don’t come on with me, baby, my old man’s outside.’”

  Connection: The man you buy it from. Whatever “it” may be. The “Man.”

  Cook: To do what you do well. “When he started blowing piano, I couldn’t see nothing happening, but now he’s starting to cook.”

  Cool: Safe, good, all right, yes, appropriate. An outlook. An attitude. A type of jazz. “Cool it” means stop it, leave, relax, change the subject, etc.

  Cop: To obtain, either by purchase or by theft. Many hip expressions owe their validity to being more inclusive in meaning than their English equivalents. See “Old lady.”

  Cop out: Excuse, shield, cover story.

  Count: The amount. “Was it a good count?” “No, man, I got burned.”

  Crazy: Obsolete term of approval.

  Crib: Apartment, “pad.” Musicians’ term.

  Cut, cut out: Leave, “split.”

  Dig: Understand, appreciate. Also, to look at or listen to. To pay attention. Often used as interjectory verbal punctuation, to command attention or to break up thoughts. “Dig. We were walking down Tenth Avenue, you dig it, and dig! Here comes this cop. So dig, here’s what we did.”

  Do up: To use up or to destroy. “We did up the dope and then we did up the car.”

  Down home: Oddly enough, a phase of approval. A “down home stud” is a man endowed with the old-fashioned virtues of honesty and integrity. Down to earth. Solid. Also funky, earthy.

  Drag: A person or thing that is boring or depressing. “What a drag. What a bring down. I’m drug with this party, I’m going to cut out.”

  Dues: The disadvantages you will put up with in order to get what you want. The punishment for unwise behaviour.

  Eye, the: The television set.

  Eyes: Desire. “I got big eyes for some scoff, man, starving.” Or, more simply, “I’m gonna split, you eyes?” Meaning: Do you want to come?

  Face: Person. “He’s a West Coast face.”

  Fall, to take a: To be arrested.

  Fall by: Visit.

  Fall in: Enter.

  Fall out: Go to sleep suddenly. “Like, when you said ‘Fall by,’ we thought we’d fall over and fall in on you, but blew it, we fell out.”

  Far Out: W
eird, difficult to understand, strangely motivated. “He’s a very far out cat. He sleeps in a bath full of jellied consomme.”

  Fink: An informer. Lowest form of animal life.

  Flick: Movie.

  Flip: To go crazy. Less literally, to “flip” over something means to like it a great deal.

  Forget it: Expression of contempt.

  Freak: Someone who likes something very much, or exclusively. A girl who only goes for musicians is a “musician freak.” “I can’t smoke these cigarettes, man, I’m a menthol freak.”

  Freak scene: Swinging, but not monogamously.

  Freaky: Strange, odd, funny.

  Full, full-out: Complete, or utter. “It was a full shuck,” “She’s a full-out freak.”

  Funky: Earthy, down home. When pronounced “Fonky” it means very earthy, very down home.

  Fuzz: The police. Originally a pickpockets’ term, stemming from the fact that police had nothing in their pockets but fuzz.

  Gas: Superlative. “It was a gas, I mean it was a wig.”

  Geets: Home-made telephone slugs.

  Get in the wind: To leave, cut out.

  Good people: A good person. “I dig Charley, man, he’s good people.”

  Grease: Money. Also means to eat, or food.

  Groove behind, to: To like or enjoy. “I groove behind raspberry sherbet.”

  Groovy: Coming back into use as a complimentary adjective. “She’s a groovy chick.”

  Hangup: A fascinating object or concept. Also, a psychological block or personality quirk.

  Head: Originally, a marijuana smoker, or “tea head.” Now very similar in meaning to “freak.” A greedy person is a “greed head.”

  Heat: Police.

  High: Intoxicated by narcotics, marijuana, stimulants, depressants, what you will. “Shoe polish is a nutty high.”

  Hincty: Paranoid, overly nervous about the police. “You bring me down when you go into your hincty bag.”

  Hip: To know, to be aware.

  Hipster: A fully paid-up member of Hip society.

  Hippy: A junior member of Hip society, who may know the words, but hasn’t fully assimilated the proper attitude.

  Hippie-dip: Derogatory term for hippy.

  Holding: To have on one’s person whatever is needed, usually drugs or money.

  Hooked: Addicted.

  Hook: A mania. A Satyr may be said to have a “terrible chick hook.”

  Horn: The telephone. “Get on the horn, call me up.”

  Hung up: Neurotic. Also, to be in a position in which one is robbed of choice, frustrated. Also, fascinated.

  Hustle: To work in a field other than your own. “Are you gigging steady?” “No man, I’m hustling.” Scuffling.

  Hustler: A survival artist, usually with no visible source of income, often engaged in small-time illegal activity.

  In Front: Before. In advance. “I want the bread in front.”

  Into something: Someone who is putting good creative ideas into his work may be said to be “into something.” A high compliment.

  Jim: An uncomplimentary form of address. A one word putdown. “Cool yourself, Jim.”

  Jive: A fearsome insult. Originally in three words. Now, the second two words are usually left unspoken. “You jive . . .” “I can’t stand all them jive people.”

  Joint: Marijuana cigarette.

  Juice: Liquor.

  Juice-head: A habitual drunk, a lush.

  Juiced: Drunk.

  Junkie: A narcotics addict.

  Later: Goodbye. Also, a derogatory term similar to “Forget it.” “Later for that, man.”

  Lay on: To give. “Lay a deuce on me ’til Tuesday.” Lend me two dollars.

  Like: A form of verbal punctuation. The extensive use of this word would seem to indicate that the hipster is unconsciously aware of the fact that he can never communicate exactly what he wants to say, and that what he is saying is at best an approximation of what he intends to communicate.

  Loose wig: To be free to “swing” creatively is to have a loose wig.

  Make: To take. “I make mescaline about twice a year.”

  Make, to: “I made him for fuse by the way he came on.” I guessed that he was probably a police officer because of the way he behaved.

  Make it, to: To be good. “Trane really makes it, man.”

  Make it with, to: To have an affair with someone is to “make it” with him or her. “I’m making it with Jenny now. Man, she really makes it!”

  Man: A neutral form of address for either sex.

  Man, the: The police. Also, the connection.

  Mother: Friendly form of address. “There you go, mother.”

  Nod: A brief nap. “It’s uncool to nod on the street corner waiting for the light to change.”

  Nutty: Nice, good, attractive. Also, a phrase of agreement, or assent.

  Ofay: Negro term for white person. Pig Latin for “foe.”

  Old lady: Lover or wife.

  Old Man: Lover or husband. This is a significant attitude, drawing as little distinction as possible between lover and marital partner.

  Off, to: To steal. “Dig the chandelier? I offed it from a church.”

  Off the wall: Weird, unlikely, far out.

  Out: Similar to, but more complimentary than “far out”—“They’re a nutty group, man, they blow some out sounds.”

  Pad: A Hip home or apartment.

  Pick up on, to: To pay attention to, to listen to. “Let’s go pick up on some sounds.” Also, to take, or “make.” “I been clean for a month, I would dig to pick up on some pot.” To discover. “Ever since Roge picked up on Islam he’s been a different cat.”

  Pin: To examine with full attention. “I tight pinned him, and I make him a full-out fraud.”

  Pinned: Pupils dilated. “Am I pinned?”

  Popped: Arrested, “busted.”

  Pot: Marijuana.

  Pound, a: Five dollars.

  Put down: To reject, to denigrate. Also, an insult. “What a terrible put-down!”

  Put on: A favourite sport of the Hipster, occasionally vicious. A variety of practical joke in which the victim is not aware that he is being “had.” See also, Riff.

  Reefer: Once meant marijuana cigarette, now refers to a quantity of marijuana. The difference in this case between hip and non-hip depends on the article. It is un-hip to ask for “a reefer,” but “Have you got any reefer?” is acceptable. Under certain circumstances, of course.

  Riff: Originally, an improvised instrumental solo. Now, a conversational solo. “Harold blew a nutty riff about the alligators in the New York subways.” A “riff” can be used in a “put on.” “Man, I never know whether you’re coming on straight, or just riffing at me.”

  Roach: The unsmoked remains of a “joint.”

  Salty: Angry.

  Salty, to jump: To “come on” in an angry way.

  Scarf: To eat.

  Scoff: To eat. “Scarf” and “scoff” are also used as nouns. “Let’s pick up some scarf.”

  Score: To make a successful deal with the connection. Also, to succeed with a girl.

  Scuffle: To hustle.

  Shades: Sun glasses.

  Shaking: Happening. “What’s shaking?”

  Short: Car.

  Short line: Very little money. “I’m hung up behind very short line.” “It’s a fun gig, but short line.” —It’s a good job, but the pay is small.

  Shuck: A con, fraud, or put on.

  Scam: A practical improvisation. “How are we going to decorate this coffee house on forty-three bucks?” “Take it off your wig, we’ll scam it.” Don’t worry about it, we’ll scuffle something together. Also, a synonym for shuck. A fraud may be called a “full scam.”

  Scene: Where the happenings happen. “When I came back in from the coast, all my buddies had split the scene.” Also, a party. “Call up some people. We’ll make a scene.”

  Sides: Records.

  Slam: Jail. Or, “the slammer.”
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  Something else: Something very good indeed.

  Sound: To ask. “I sounded him about a gig, but nothing’s happening.”—I asked him about a job, but there were no openings.

  Sounds: Music. “Have you got any sounds at your pad?” Do you have a radio or a phonograph?

  Split: To leave.

  Square: Conventional, unimaginative. A Babbitt.

  Straight: High, or stoned. “Fall by and I’ll straighten your head for you.” Also, not high, not stoned—down. To “get straight” means to get whatever you need. “Need any bread?” “No, baby, I’m straight.” To “straighten” someone means to give him the correct information, what he needs or to give him

  Straights: Civilian cigarettes.

  Stone: Complete, as in “full.” “She’s a stone freak.” “He’s a stone pro.”

  Stoned: Very high.

  Stash: A secret hiding place for illicit goods. Often elaborate or imaginative.

  Strung out: Far gone, physically or mentally. When one’s source of supply is cut off, one is “strung out.”

  Stud: A male.

  Swing, to: To be happy or successful or both. To enjoy oneself. To “groove.”

  Taking care of business: Attending to the annoying but essential practical details of existence without losing one’s ability to “swing.” The phrase, “He takes care of business” often has the ring of admiration.

  Taste: A sample.

  Tapped: Arrested.

  There you go: A greeting, “Hello.”

  Tight: On close, friendly terms. “I’m tight with him.” He’s a good friend of mine.

  Tossed: Searched by the police. “The man tossed my short and they found a roach. That’s how I got tapped.”

 

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