Jayden clasps a huge hand on my shoulder. “Good job, Sensation.”
I turn to Miles and huff a laugh. “I can’t believe you trusted me. I didn’t even trust myself.”
He shrugs. “I trusted Jayden.”
I give him a little push. “I’m the one who asked Jayden over. You were going to let me do it alone.”
He smiles and shrugs, and we hold each other’s gazes for a beat too long.
I look away and push the hair out of my face. “You can do me now.”
He lowers his chin. “I can?”
I nod and turn around. I check to make sure he’s behind me, and he is. I close my eyes, but then I start to freak out. I check for him again. “Are you there?”
“Of course I’m here.”
“But you’re not going to get distracted, are you?” I ask. “You’re not going to like hear some funny joke across the room and then look to see what’s—”
“I’m not going to take my eyes off you, even if there’s an earthquake. Okay?”
I nod and inhale a deep breath, wondering what I’m so worried about. “What motivation do you have to catch me?” I ask, part joke, part delay tactic.
“I’ll look like a huge wimp in front of all these people.”
I look around, and several of our classmates are watching us.
“Do it, Jenna!” Nicolette shouts.
“He’s looking at his phone!” some guy shouts.
Now it’s a thing. I waited too long past the obligatory five seconds I had to work this fear out, and now I’ve made a spectacle of myself, which I usually don’t mind, but right this minute, I kind of do.
“Just fall,” someone says.
“Okay!” I shout back. “Just hush.”
Now I sound like my mom. Somehow as the thought of her enters my mind, I’m suddenly paralyzed further.
“I’ve got you, Jenna,” Miles says. “I’m not going to drop you. I promise.”
The tone of his voice, so assured and not pressuring, gives me the strength I need. I close my eyes, lift my arms to the side, and then fall backward.
Chapter Twelve
Jenna
Shane and I put our trays away and walk toward the theatre where the names for the talent competition will be announced.
“I’m not even sure why I’m going with you,” I say.
He nudges me. “Don’t say that. You never know. And I don’t think you were half as bad as you think you were. I don’t even think you were bad at all.”
I give him a bless your heart smile. “Thank you for saying that. But we both know I sucked huge donkey balls.”
That gets me a smile from him.
We walk into the theatre, and I’m shocked to find it full. “What are all these people doing here?” I ask.
“Talent show’s a big deal. Everyone always comes out for the announcement, even lowerclassmen.”
“Perfect,” I say. “My humiliation on display for the masses.”
“Quit it, Quigley. You’re psyching yourself out.”
“I’m being realistic. There’s a huge difference.”
The door opens behind us, and Miles walks in. Shane stands up taller, and the two hold each other’s stares like Batman vs. Superman.
“Hey,” Shane says.
“Hey,” Miles says back.
I look between the two of them. “Well, now that we have that out of the way.”
A teacher takes the stage and people woot and holler like she’s got the results of the four-hundred-million-dollar lottery up there.
The teacher grins and holds out her free hand. “Okay, okay. Settle down, students, so we can get started.” It takes a minute, but they all finally calm down. “Now, I know I say it every year, but this year, I really do think we had the stiffest competition we’ve had to date.” Everyone yells and claps again, and she smiles, putting her hand out. “That being said, we still could only pick ten students to compete, and trust me when I say, it’s going to be a prodigious competition.”
More shouts. Good gracious. This audience is more responsive than the Sensation one was, and they were being guided by flashing signs.
“So without further ado…”
“Ado! Ado!” someone screams out, and people laugh.
She gives a look in the direction of the comment and then holds up the paper in front of her. “In no particular order, we have…”
As rowdy as the audience has been, you could hear a pin drop now.
“Lindsey McCoy.”
Claps and shouts ensue, and due time is given for the applause. My god, if this is the tryout announcement, what’s the show like?
“The CC Forever Dance Team.”
The girls from the cotillion cluster stand and jump up and down, screaming louder than the applause.
“Carter Massey.”
A guy stands up out of his aisle seat and does an elaborate bow followed up with a herkie jump. I remember him from tryouts. He did a dramatic interpretation piece that I thought would be cheesy, but turned out really cool.
“Shane McCollough.”
I turn to him and hold out my arms with a huge smile. He gives a stunned smile, blinking as he gazes out to the audience who seems to be looking all around for him. Many find him, and clap with shouts and calls. No doubt, this is the loudest reception yet.
He finally meets my gaze, smiling like it’s settling in for him.
I throw my arms around him and squeeze, getting caught up in the moment. “Awesome, Shane!” I pull away from him.
“Thanks,” he says, and then looks past me to Miles.
Miles holds out his hand, his expression impassive. “You deserve it, man.”
“You, too,” Shane says.
These two are going to kill me with their mutual respect and competitiveness with one another.
“Wading Birds, the band.” Yeah, they were pretty darn good.
“Angela Lytle.” An opera singer who practically made me weep at tryouts.
“Gaelin Zafar.” He had this tribal drum setup that I couldn’t look away from if you paid me.
Despite knowing every one of these artists being called were eighteen times better than me, I still hold out ridiculous hope that this woman will somehow dare to utter my name, but Miles still hasn’t been called, and neither have at least five acts that I thought were obviously going to be in, so I’m thinking I need to pack it up and figure out an alternative way to get money for L.A.
“David Willis.” I give pause, because he was a piano player like Miles, but he was classical and Miles was original, so hopefully there’s room for both of them in the competition. Wait, why am I trying to make room for Miles? I need to be making room for me.
“Miles Cleveland.”
Shane gives Miles one solid clap on the back, causing Miles to stumble forward a little.
“Sorry,” Shane says, his cheeks turning red.
Miles furrows his brow at Shane. “No problem.”
I smile at Miles, genuinely. “Congrats.”
He nods, still frowning. God, is he feeling guilty? Enough. There is one more name to be called. It’s not completely hopeless.
“And finally, Pier Farris.”
Of course it’s her. A Rihanna look- and sound-a-like whose monitor did not get cut off and who likely would have taken my spot on Sensation if she’d have had the chance.
So there’s that. No talent show for me. I do realize I’ve dug my own grave here, but it still stings. I start to walk out, but Shane grabs my arm. “Hang on. She hasn’t announced the alternate yet.”
I perk up. “Alternate?”
He nods at the stage as the final applause die down.
“As you all know, last year’s stomach flu took out two of our contestants, so subbing in our alternate, we still only had nine competitors. So this year, we’ll have two alternate spots. Those will go to…”
She makes us wait for it, my heartbeat flying like a ceiling fan on high.
“Alternate number one
will be…Divine Miss Divas dance team.”
And just like that, the ceiling fan gets switched off.
Nicolette, Greta, and Jasmine hug each other, a little somber, but all smiles, nonetheless. I do hate that they didn’t beat out the cluster for a spot.
“Alternate number one will take the first open spot should one come available.”
Duh, I think we all knew that by the number.
“Alternate number two will go to…”
Shane takes my hand and squeezes it. I squeeze back, this whole reveal experience making me so antsy I think energy might shoot out of my fingertips.
“Jenna Quigley.”
I scream. I can’t believe I did that. I smile and turn to Shane. I hold my hands out to the side. “It’s something.”
He picks me up and spins me around. When he sets me down, he hovers a little too close to my face, and I have to take a step backward.
I run into something behind me, and hands are on my back, steadying me. I turn around, and I’m face-to-face with Miles.
“Congratulations,” he says, with no smile, the guilt oozing from his dark eyes behind those glasses.
“Thanks,” I say. “It’s an honor just to be nominated.”
My joke falls flat, but that’s not unusual with him.
People start to get up, and the teacher on stage says, “We hope to see you all for the show in December, which will be held at the Tennessee Performing Arts Center.”
I turn around and look between Shane and Miles. “This thing is held at TPAC?”
They both nod, each really cute in his own unique way, I notice.
Wow. They don’t mess around with this thing. A real stage with a big audience. Damn, I’m pissed I didn’t make that list. The hardest part is, I don’t know if I’d have made the cut even without Nat screwing me up. I just wish I had another shot at the whole thing.
“Do you want to go get some air outside?” Shane asks.
Miles eyes him and then turns around and heads out of the theatre. “Sure,” I say, watching the back of Miles walk away from us.
Shane and I head out to the front lawn, and I close my arms over my chest, the fall chill hitting me.
“Are you cold?” Shane asks.
“A little. I’m fine, though.”
He squares himself up in front of me. He pulls me toward him and puts his arms around me. “I’ll warm you up.”
I stand there with my face pressed against his chest. Well, crap. I figured this whole brother/sister thing was too good to be true. I pull away, my heart heavy. “Look, Shane—”
“Jenna!”
I turn around to find Nicolette, Greta, and Jasmine headed my way. I smile. “Hey, congratulations on Alternate One.” I’m not sure if that’s insulting or not, but since I’m Alternate Two, I think I have license to say it.
Nicolette tilts her head. “Thanks. It’s a bummer, but, what can we do?”
Jasmine’s nose is in her phone. “Hire a guy to club a knee.”
We all stare at her in silence.
She looks up from her phone. “I’m kidding.”
Nicolette turns back to me. “So are the two of you going to the dance on Friday night?”
Shane and I glance at each other.
“A dance?” I ask Nicolette.
“Our version of Homecoming,” she says. “You know we don’t have sports here, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be able to have our own celebration.”
I shrug. “Cool.”
“So you’ll come with us?” Nicolette looks between Shane and me.
“Well, we haven’t—”
Shane interrupts me. “I actually was going to see if you wanted to go.”
Nicolette claps her hands together. “Perfect. That makes even couples. We’ll have Dev and me, Nat and Jasmine—”
Jasmine looks up from her phone. “Say what?”
Nicolette continues. “Greta and Miles, and now you and Shane.”
Greta and Miles? They’re a couple?
Jasmine waves a long blue fingernail. “I am not a couple with Nat.”
Nicolette clasps her hands. “So it’s a quadruple date! We’ll work out the details later. Have a good rest of your lunch. Oh, and congratulations to you, Shane.”
He points at me. “And to Jenna, too.”
“Oh yes. Of course. Congratulations, Jenna. Bye!”
They walk away, and I turn to Shane. He stands there with his eyebrows raised, smiling. I’ve got to nip this now. I put my hands in my pockets. “So you’re cool if we do this whole dance thing as friends, right?”
His expression falls a little. “Oh yeah. Of course.”
“I mean, it sounds like a group thing, you know?”
“Oh yeah,” he says. “Definitely.”
“Cool,” I say.
“Cool,” he says.
We both kind of look around for something to do or say. I jerk a thumb at one of the food trucks. “I’m just gonna grab a lemonade before we head back inside.”
“Sounds good,” he says. “I’m gonna head back to the guitar conservatory.”
“Cool,” I say, backing away. “See you in Debate.”
“Yeah.” He nods.
I exhale a deep breath. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, really. Shane is a guitar god, and he’s all hot and sweet and thoughtful. My notebooks should be covered with hearts quartered with our initials in them. But I’m not feeling it for him in that way. I really want to be his friend…like not in a let’s just be friends, but I don’t mean it kind of way. Like I want him in my life. Because right now, the alternative is Nicolette and her crew, who are fine, but I just can’t relax around them. I’m totally relaxed around Shane.
Miles walks up to the food truck beside the one I’m waiting in line at. I smile and wave, and he waves back and then looks down at his phone. I’m definitely not comfortable around him. I’m all fumbles and belly rumbles when he looks me in the eye.
I take my lemonade and sort of stroll around the front lawn, killing time. Miles is drinking a smoothie, sort of doing the same thing I’m doing. We kind of stroll toward one another.
“We’ve got a date Friday night, I hear,” I say, breaking the ice.
He furrows his brow. “We do?”
“The dance. Nicolette asked if Shane and I would come with you all.”
“Oh,” he says.
“I didn’t realize you and Greta were a couple,” I say, blatantly fishing.
He shakes his head. “It’s just a group thing.”
I nod. “Sounds good.”
He takes a drink of his smoothie and then meets my gaze. “I didn’t realize you and Shane were a couple.”
I smile, fingering my straw. I shake my head. “A group thing.”
He nods. “Cool.”
“Mmm-hmm.”
Every inch of my body is alive as I stand here near him. He gets cuter every time I see him. His lips forming an O around the straw are causing a frenzy in my belly.
Now is when we should separate, him to his piano conservatory, and me to…well…maybe I need to make a place for myself at the choral conservatory. But I’m not ready to leave him just yet.
I flip my hair to my back. “Weston’s lectures have been a snooze fest lately, don’t you think? I’m ready to write some more.”
He shrugs. “I’m learning a lot, I think. But I do like the writing parts.”
He hangs on to my gaze for a minute longer than he should, and I hope he’s referring to the moment when we opened up to each other last week.
“Yeah, me, too. Maybe we’ll get to do that again soon.”
He holds my stare. “Maybe.”
Oh god, what am I doing? I don’t need to get something started here. That’s like the worst idea in the world. I’m not sure what’s going on with Greta and him, and I still don’t know how much I can trust him. I really do tend to believe he told the truth about Nat, but I can’t be sure. The only people in the world I can truly trust are my dad a
nd Chloe. I just need to keep reminding myself of that.
Friendship good. Anything romantic bad…at least for the time being.
Chapter Thirteen
Jenna
I’ve been more bummed this week than I even thought I would be. I’ve had dreams of me stealing people’s costumes and hiding them so they couldn’t perform. As if that would stop anyone. In this one dream, I was watching the show, and one of the acts (no one who actually made the show) was so bad that I stood up and shouted, “They’re awful! Let me go! I’m Alternate Two!”
I need the money for L.A., but it’s more than that. I need to prove to all these people at this school that I am worthy of that top ten. It’s humiliating. I can already feel people looking at me differently. Nobody at this school has seemed overly impressed with me since day one, except for Shane, of course. But everyone else at least seemed to have respect for me. Now it’s like they’re all looking at me with these snooty expressions, like they knew I was a fraud all along.
Every time I pass Nat in the hallway, we hold each other’s glares like we’re about to face off in a boxing ring, neither of us backing down. The thought of turning him in has crossed my mind on occasion, but I’m not going to do that. For one, I’m not going to tattle like I’m three, and for two, he was avenging his friend. Part of me respects that.
It doesn’t look like he and Miles are speaking, which piles on the guilt. Miles and I walked out of Music class together earlier today, and they didn’t acknowledge one another. I already feel guilty enough for taking Miles’s number at the Sensation audition. I don’t need breaking up a friendship on my shoulders as well.
“It’s Friday!” Nicolette calls as she comes toward me doing a little dance step. “Are you ready for tonight?”
I shut my locker and then copy her dance moves in response.
She lets out a deep breath, squaring herself in front of me. “Look, Greta, Jasmine, and I have been thinking. We’d like to offer you a spot in our group.” She searches my eyes for a response.
I narrow my gaze. “Do you mean your friendship group, or…”
She gives me a playful shove. “No, our dance team. Now, I know you already turned us down once, but since you didn’t make the competition, and we are Alternate One, you’re probably a lot more likely to get into the show on our team than as Alternate Two.”
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