by L K Walker
A smile spread over his face, drawing back full lips over a white set of teeth.
“No, it is not quite like that. You are confusing us with dogs. I mean emotions, feelings. We can locate each other by the feelings we put out. Humans put out those same feelings.”
Ari nodded.
“The worlds themselves are very different. For instance, mine has very little anger and suffering, whereas the seethers’ world, from the information we have gathered, is overrun with those sensations. Your world is like a buffer between the two, having both pain and happiness in equal measure. It’s like a continuum.”
“You say it like it’s a good thing.”
“Do not be so sure that it’s not.” He looked at her. “Anyway, centuries ago some of the scientists from my world came here to explore and research Earth in order for us to better understand our similarities and, ah, our differences.”
“Are you sure you don’t think of us as a lower species. We do that with apes.”
“I said we don’t. Do you want the story or not?”
“Sorry.”
“We thought there was only one means of entry to Earth, and we had it secure. We still don't know how, but there was a lapse in the lock holding the boundaries tight between all three worlds. A small hole opened up. We think some of the seethers upset the programming when trying to get out of their hellish existence.”
“To take over Earth.”
“We don’t know whether they were aiming for Earth or for my world. We just know that is their goal now.”
He turned his eyes to hers. Ari’s frown of concentration encouraged him.
“You are coping very well with the concepts,” he assured her.
“Coping with the concepts?” she retorted. “I'm tossing up whether or not I should run off screaming there's a nutter on the loose.”
“But you're still here.”
“I'm still deciding,” she laughed. Ari's comfort with the stranger grew the more he talked. She even gave him a reassuring smile. When he returned it, her heart upped its tempo.
“I hope some of this is starting to make sense.” He finally looked away.
“It shouldn’t, should it?”
“Do you want me to tell you more?”
Ari nodded.
“So some of the seethers escaped into this dimension. At the same time, there seemed to be an opening of the gates of our world. A few of us, researchers like me, already lived on Earth. Others, nearest to the rift, came through from our side to help out where they could and tried to close it. Most of them were security personnel who hadn’t been here before and up until then had had no intentions of visiting. Suddenly, the rift closed trapping them here. They tried everything they could think of to get back. We all did. Even for those of us already here, it had never been a permanent assignment.”
“You’re stuck here, away from your home.”
“This is my home now. I have lived here longer than I did there. This is all I remember. Fighting for life helps you to forget what it is you have lost.”
“When it happened, when you realised you couldn’t go home, you didn’t think about it then?”
“None of us had any idea that the seethers had come through too. None of us knew what they were. Back then, we didn’t know they even existed. At first, we thought it was some of our own, gone rogue. It took a while to work out they weren’t. We were too focussed on stopping them to reflect on whether or not we could ever get back.”
“How long have you been here? What are you—like, mid-twenties. It can’t have been that long ago.”
“Over 300 years, give or take. You start to lose count …” his voice trailed off, “… or stop caring.”
Ari stared at Nate in disbelief.
“How old are you?”
“Old enough. We age differently. Trust me, my soul feels the age. It’s tired, and it feels thin, but I can't give up until this is finished.”
“In all this time you haven’t found a way home?” Ari spoke softly, unsure how sensitive the subject might be to her new acquaintance.
“We can only guess, but we think our world locked down the rift, and it won't reopen again until the seethers no longer walk on Earth. They wouldn’t risk another breach, not if the seethers could take advantage of it.”
“You sound like you want to go back.”
“Three hundred years of walking Earth in near solitude, watching friends die, making new friends and watching them die too, over and over. It makes you feel that way.”
“Then why don't you, well, end it.”
“There is no one to fill the vacancy.”
“Oh.” Alien or whatever the hell he was, Ari felt her heart wrenching.
“What do they want—the seethers?”
“They want to make people angry, and they will keep doing it until they tip the balance, until there are more callous arseholes stomping around on this rock than there are good people. When the selfish and vengeful have the monopoly, that is when the seethers will make their move. All those sadistic, selfish people aren’t likely to defend their world, perhaps they will even be persuaded to help, get a chunk of whatever is left after an invasion. Once they have tipped the balance, they will be able to open the gates and take this world for their own.”
“But why? Why do they want our world?”
“Imagine a world of seethers, like the man you met in the woods. Millions of uncaring souls, their world's energy supplies diminished, stripped without remorse. They have destroyed any semblance of a healthy existence they may have had. They want a new start, to try again. Humans would get in the way, so any losses would merely be collateral.”
Ari began to understand the enormity of the responsibility Nate had taken on. She noted how tired and drawn his face had become talking about it.
She pitied him. As they walked, side by side, Nate’s hands grazed hers. She fantasised about taking his hand and reassuring him that life would get better. But considering the tragedies he must have dealt with in his long life, she assumed her words would provide little consolation, so she stopped short of actually doing it.
Instead, she looked down at her feet and kept moving forward. “I can't even start to comprehend what you have had to go through,” Ari said.
“I'm sorry to dump this on you. You have landed straight into the makings of a horror story and haven't even had time to grapple with what's happening.” His voice lowered, “I know what it is to have impossible choices placed before you. But that seether knows what you are, and he’s coming for you.”
Ari stopped dead. Every inch of her skin tightened.
“What I am? What does he want with me?”
The sentinel stopped too, his eyes searched the horizon before focussing on Ari. “You must know by now that you are special—different to those around you. You are able to sense what others cannot.”
“Special is not how I would describe it.” Her tone was less than appreciative. “But how would he know that I'm different?”
“Like I’ve said, we can feel emotions. Whereas you gauge a person’s feeling primarily by their facial expressions and tone, we go straight for the source. But with you, it's different. I can feel everybody else and know exactly where they are—but you, you are a blank slate. I can hear you and see you, but I look for your emotional signature, and you are not there. Not a shadow, nor a void. Nothing.”
His beautiful eyes stared at her intently as if he searched for her now.
“You’re wrong. That seether thing found me. He tracked me all the way out here. He mocked me, going round and round in circles before coming at me. He knew where I was.”
“Have you considered he may have known you were in the forest, but not exactly where you were? I would guess the circling was a search arc.”
“But why would that guy, that seether, why would he want me?”
“What you can do, Ari, is extraordinarily rare. The seethers were the first to come across someone with a talent like yours. Nata
liah, I think her name was. As you can imagine, staring at someone like you, with no evident emotions, is curious and, well, a little exhilarating.” He moved closer, lifting his hands as if to touch her, but instead he screwed them into a ball and put them back by his sides.
“It was by sheer accident that the seethers even found Nataliah. They stumbled across her by pure chance, like this one did with you.”
“In my friend’s backyard,” Ari noted.
“Yes, like that. It was your friend’s house. That’s why you didn’t reappear. I hung around the house for a while hoping you would show up so I could talk to you but came up empty. I started to think I had imagined you in the window.”
“I know how you feel.” Ari laughed nervously. “So what happened to Nataliah?”
“Perhaps a story for another time.” He started to walk away. When Ari didn’t move, he reluctantly returned.
“It’s not a happy ending, is it?”
“No,” he said, running a hand through his sandy blonde hair.
“Then you’d better tell me now. Get it over with.”
He seemed to consider it for a few seconds before letting out a sigh.
“They're selfish beings the seethers. The idea of self-sacrifice had never even crossed their minds. They thought they had given her no other choice but to comply. But, as it turned out, there was another option.” His voice hitched. “She took her own life when she found out what they wanted her for. The thought of helping them to make her world a place of darkness was more than she could bear.”
“And they want to use me like that?” The thought made her sick. “Do I have a third choice?”
“Run,” Nate said matter-of-factly. “You should run.”
“What if they catch me?”
“No one would blame you if you chose an early departure too.”
“What?” Then his intention struck her. “No. That would be giving up. I'm not doing that. Not when I can still fight.”
“I'm very pleased to hear it. Fighting is a whole lot easier when you know you have choices, even if the other option is not very appealing.”
“What else can I do?” Ari asked.
“I really don't know.” To Ari's dismay, he said it without regret. She was relying on this stranger to tell her what to do. Naively, she thought he was here to save her.
“That night, when you appeared at the window and saw us in the yard, we were there purely by chance. I had tracked the seether down and he had ducked in there to hide from me. I was tired of following him around and watching him all the time. I had decided to take him on, face to face. Let the chips fall …” He trailed off, momentarily grimacing before returning his attention to Ari. “I could not feel your presence. If you hadn't made a noise, I would never have known you were there. The seether was the same. He was just as surprised as I was.”
“If I was normal, if you could sense me, you could have done so from that distance?”
“If I was not looking, no I could not. But when I heard you, I could focus it, push it out further. The seether would have done the same.”
“How far?”
“Only a few metres, maybe a maximum of twenty. Normally it is only a metre or two, otherwise it would be overwhelming. As it is, human emotion is exceedingly strong and, at times, it feels like it's drowning me.”
“And that’s the same for the seether?”
“The seether cannot seek out lost souls at a distance, but he knows you will be able to. You would be his grief compass. Search and destroy.”
Ari remembered standing at the school gates looking for Nevaeh when she had run off after her set-to with Ellie. She had found her because of the sadness she carried inside.
“Well this sucks.” Ari’s ability was already a burden. She had spent her life hiding it from everyone around her. It was no longer her little secret. “Other than you and that seether who, by the way, is way more intense than regular people, I can only do it with friends or family, only people who are close to me.”
“If it was only them you could sense, then he wouldn't bother. You have the ability to focus your thoughts and you can look for others, not just family.
“No. I can’t.”
“Have you ever tried?”
She thought back. “It’s not something you just do, is it? Why would I have looked for someone I didn’t know?”
“I hate to be the bearer of bad news then.”
“Can others like me do that?”
“It seems to go hand in hand with whatever it is that masks you.”
“What happened to the others? The ones other than Nataliah.”
“From the stories I've heard, some didn't have the control you have and had already gone mad by the time we found them. Some, like Nataliah, took their own lives, either to get away from the seethers or the emotions that constantly battered them. A couple of people we’ve managed to get into hiding.” He smiled.
“The odds don't sound like they’re in my favour.” Ari didn’t mean to sound harsh, just realistic.
“You are different. You can control the emotions far better than most. Even now, with me—walking beside you, you are in control.”
“How can you tell?”
Nate smiled, really smiled for the first time. It lit up his whole face. Man, that smile made him sexy.
“Can you describe what you feel when I am here?” he asked.
Ari thought hard, not knowing what to look for. When she paid attention, she became aware of feelings clawing in the well of her mind. She let down her barriers and, without any resistance, they bubbled to the surface.
“This close—bliss.” She said it without thinking. Eyes closed, she absorbed the ecstasy that wrapped around her senses. The shuffle of her feet towards Nate was an unconscious reaction. The hands that sought their way onto his torso were not.
Nate cleared his throat before she had a chance to make contact.
Ari's eyes popped open. She pushed the feelings away again, but not before a healthy glow flushed her cheeks. She eased a step back.
To her embarrassment, Nate still had that luxurious smile on his face.
“Sentinels evolved to project allure, no doubt to increase mating options; like women have fuller lips or bigger breasts. For us, and the rest of humanity, it is not that noticeable, but for the likes of you, it is a real game changer. People who can’t control their emotions become confused, unable to distinguish what they feel from the allure we exude. Either way, they experience feelings of lust.”
“So you knew I was different because I hadn’t started hitting on you yet?” She hadn't meant to add the ‘yet’; it slipped out. She hoped Nate hadn't noticed it.
“How do you stay in control? I have never met anyone who has been that good without a bit of practice. Most people like you are hysterical after their first encounter with a seether.”
“Oh, I feel hysterical, believe me. But, I don't know, I guess I can put it out of my mind.”
“How?”
“The same way you try and forget anything really. It's still there. I simply make it harder to find.”
“Can you do it now, bring it back to the surface? I want to get an idea of how strong it is.”
Ari was hesitant—she’d embarrassed herself once – but did as he asked. She closed her eyes and searched for the feelings she’d pushed away. They welled up and, when she again opened her eyes, they flooded in. He wasn’t wrong about the lust. As she looked up into his face, Ari reclosed the gap. This time there was no space between them other than the space taken up by Ari’s singlet. Looking up into his face, she immersed herself in his warm, sparkling, green eyes. They entranced her. Nate brushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. Without intention, her hand wandered, and she found her fingers running tenderly down his chest, admiring its strength. Ari wet her lips, imagining what it would be like to taste Nate’s. He never dropped his gaze from hers. His hands tenderly ran down the outside of her arms.
The intensity of his t
ouch was exhilarating. Ari’s breath became shallow. It was all she could do to keep her feet on the ground. She wanted to wrap her legs around his waist and be done with it.
His fingers continued their journey down her arms until his hands captured her wrists. She tried to rise onto tiptoes, to get a taste of his lips, but something hindered her movement. Looking down she saw he had locked her hands by her side, holding her in place. It was enough of a distraction to pull her from the lust-filled stupor.
He stared into her eyes. “Now, can you control it?”
Suddenly, Ari became aware of how close she stood to Nate. His body moved against hers with each breath. Even with lust safely tucked away, a part of Ari still wanted to stay where she was. But good manners got the better of her.
“Um, sorry.” She took a step back, mortified by her actions.
Not that he had seemed to mind.
“You have an amazing amount of control. That will be useful.” The playful light, dancing across his features, receded. He was back to being serious. “Come on, we need to keep going.”
Nate’s long legs strode out towards the car. Ari had to jog a few steps to catch up.
“I am sorry you have been brought into this. I had hoped to find you before the seether did. Not that the odds were in my favour. Seethers are better trackers; they have had more experience. My only advantage is that I’m able to sense him before he does me. I can cover a broader expanse. If I'm careful and stay on his periphery, I can track him without his knowledge. Luckily, that was what I was doing when he found you.”
“How did he find me?” Ari asked.
“I don’t know. I hope it was blind luck.”
How much luck can one guy have, he’d already bumped into her at the church. That seemed like such a long time ago now but the thought stirred up a mixture of fear and disgust.
“I had two friends who died in a car accident a couple of months ago. That seether thing turned up at their funeral. He didn’t look like he was expecting me to be there, either.”
“Actually, that is a relief,” Nate said.
“How?”
“I thought he had worked out a way to track your movements. But, hearing you say that, it sounds more like a coincidence.”
