by kendra Smith
‘You’re not the only one,’ Maddie replied, taking a huge slug of whisky from the glass offered to her. Only then did she stop shaking.
Johnny, as he turned out to be, was Ed’s boss from the surf school who had messaged them from Ed’s phone. He was ‘crashing’ in Ed’s room for a bit as it was nearer the hospital. They had both got a fright because, as he said, the last person in the world he’d expected to see shining a light in his face at 3 a.m. was ‘Ed’s freakin’ mother’. She’d sent him a hurried message to tell him she was coming – but in the rush of leaving she hadn’t told him when.
Johnny was standing by the windows taking a drink of whisky too. He’d poured them both a hefty measure after Maddie had stopped screaming. He’d told her to shut up because the owner would be coming to investigate and he shouldn’t be in Ed’s room, but he’d crashed there after taking Ed to hospital.
She couldn’t really make him out. For all she knew he could be a serial killer. She’d watched Luther on the plane and now she wished she hadn’t. But she was almost too tired to care. A sixteen-hour flight with a dribbling teenager slumped on your shoulder was enough to find you welcoming a drink from a possible serial killer.
‘Tell me what happened? To Ed.’
‘He got a bit of a knock to his head. Concussed, bloody took the waves too far out. There was this bomb came out of nowhere—’
‘Bomb!’
‘A wave, sweetie. Anyway, Ed was doing great, but then he just flipped. But it was the board that got him. It basically hit him full on, on his head. Lucky I was there.’
‘You saved him?’
‘Kind of.’
‘I’ve been worried sick.’
‘Yeah, he’s right, though. He’s OK. They gave him a CT head scan.’ And with that he touched Maddie’s hand.
They were both sitting on the edge of the bed now. There was nowhere else. She couldn’t really see him in the dark, but she was glad of his hand on hers as he gave it a squeeze. ‘Don’t worry.’
‘Do you know how to get to the hospital?’ Maddie asked.
‘Yup. We took him to the private one, just three kilometres from here. Didn’t know if he had private medical insurance, but it was the nearest. They speak English there and I, well—’
‘No, of course, that’s fine, we did get him medical insurance. I just need to check—’ She thought of Tim. She’d better tell him about Ed. They’d pay whatever it cost.
‘I guess you want to go now?’ She saw the glint of his watch in the shadowy darkness, as he glanced at it. It was 4 a.m.
‘Will we get in?’
‘Yeah, it’s twenty-four hours. Plus you’re his mum – they’ll let you in. Bring your passport. I was with him earlier,’ he added. ‘Doctors said he’s OK, bit dizzy and can’t remember the actual accident, but that’s normal. That bit of memory should come back eventually. Got a mother of a headache – that’s normal too. He’s been told to do very little in the next few days. C’mon, I’ll take you. ‘And with that he stood up. He picked something off the floor – a pair of shorts – and pulled them over his boxers and then a T-shirt, next sliding some flip-flops onto his feet.
‘Righto, let’s go.’
As they stood in the dusty street, which was admittedly slightly quieter now, she glanced at Johnny in the green light of a nearby bar. He had dreadlocked blond hair down to his shoulders, tied back in a half ponytail with a band, the silhouette of a strong jaw outlined in inky darkness. He towered above her as he lifted his arm up to hail a cab. It stopped in front of them and he opened the door for her. As they both slipped into the back seat, Maddie was grateful for the cool, air-conditioned cocoon of the cab. Johnny said something in Indonesian to the driver.
When they pulled up to the hospital, he tilted his head to one side. ‘You OK?’
She nodded. She wasn’t really but she needed to see Ed.
*
The hospital building looked like a temple had been stuck to the front of it. It had terracotta tiles and a pointy roof, large spotlights were stuck to the walls, and there were stone statues of elephants, goddesses and various figurines surrounding the base – but the building to the rear was square and modern.
Johnny spoke to a woman at the front desk who was in a crisp white shirt, dark trousers and a pearl necklace. Her hair was pulled off her face with a red headband. She gestured with her hands and spoke to Johnny as he nodded. Maddie heard what she thought was ‘treema kassay’ at the end.
‘He’s on the second floor,’ Johnny pointed to the lifts.
‘What’s treema kassay?’ Maddie asked as they went silently up.
‘It’s thank you. It’s terima kasih,’ he said, smiling.
As the lift doors opened, a member of the security team came up to them. Johnny nodded at Maddie.
‘Show them your passport – they need to check you’re Ed’s mum.’
Maddie rummaged in her bag and produced her passport; the guard took a look and then nodded and pointed further down the corridor to a cubicle with a curtain around it.
‘He’s in here,’ said Johnny as they got nearer, and he pulled the curtain back.
Ed was lying asleep on the hospital bed with a tube attached to his arm. He looked peaceful. She watched his chest rise and fall, then she took a deep breath, went and held his hand and sat next to the bed. Thank God he’s OK. And then, out of nowhere, she burst into tears.
‘Hey, hey.’ Suddenly, Johnny was next to her. He sat down on the bed and put his arm around her. She was overwhelmed, tired, and so on edge that she didn’t really care that this six-foot surfer in a crumpled T-shirt was holding her. He was warm and he was kind; she leant her head on his chest and could feel herself shaking with sobs.
‘It’s OK.’ Johnny pulled her tighter.
Which was how Ed saw them when he woke up.
‘Mum?’
She instantly pulled away from Johnny and turned to face Ed. Johnny stood up.
‘Ed! You’re awake!’ She reached out and took his hand.
He just looked at her. ‘Mum?’ he whispered. ‘Is this a dream?’ He scrunched up his eyes. ‘Why are you here?’ He looked up at her. His cheeks were pale.
‘Ed, I was worried. Full stop. No texts. No messages.’
He closed his eyes and nodded.
But she did feel a bit foolish. Middle-aged woman takes leave of her senses and goes to Bali to ‘rescue’ teenage son. For crap’s sake, she could see the headline now.
Ed was squeezing her hand. ‘Look, I’m sorry, Mum, you’re right. I guess you were worried.’ She could feel her heart thudding in her chest. She felt awful. It had been the first impulsive thing she had done in about nineteen years and she’d messed up. Tim was right. She shouldn’t be there.
‘Hey, mate,’ Johnny interrupted. ‘You right? Listen, I’m just going to find us some coffee.’ And with that Johnny sauntered out of the cubicle.
‘I’d seen that update about the storm, Ed. Thank God Johnny got in touch.’
‘I passed out. Sorry. But the storm, yeah, that’s what did it. Should never have gone out, I persuaded Johnny…’ He turned his head to one side and sighed.
‘Anyway, I just – I don’t know.’
‘Panicked.’
‘I suppose.’
Ed smiled, but then winced.
‘What is it?’
‘Headache from hell.’ He pressed his call button. ‘Need more painkillers.’
After a few minutes a nurse came in, in a smart uniform – a blue and white batik tunic, black trousers, flat black shoes. Her dark hair was pulled back in a tidy ponytail. Ed pointed to his head. ‘Painkiller?’ he said and she nodded.
‘But first I take your vital signs, then painkiller,’ she instructed.
She walked briskly past Maddie to get her equipment. When she came back she took Ed’s blood pressure, his oxygen levels and his temperature.
‘Can I speak to a doctor please?’ Maddie asked her.
‘Not till later,
maybe you wait one hour? Six o’clock?’ Maddie glanced at the clock on the wall. It was five in the morning already; apparently the doctors did their rounds at six. She moved over to one of the plastic seats just as Johnny came back with two coffees in takeaway cups. She took one and was glad of the amount of sugar that was in there; she gulped it back.
Suddenly, she was being shaken by the shoulder. She woke up in a daze. She must have dozed off. She slowly rubbed the back of her neck. It was aching. The seat next to her was empty.
‘Mrs Brown?’
She looked up blearily to see a doctor peering at her. Her eyes were gritty with tiredness.
‘Yes, yes. I wanted to ask you about my son, Ed.’ She nodded to the bed where Ed was sleeping again.
‘Yes, concussion. Luckily his friend was in the water with him. The board hit him on the back of the head, some blood, but mainly we are worried he blacked out. We’ve kept him in here to observe him – headache, but fine. He’s had the CT scan. He should be OK to get out tomorrow. Need to keep an eye on him for a couple of weeks, though.’ He smiled at Maddie. His accent was tinged with American. ‘You flew over? From England?’
She nodded. He had kind, blue eyes and sandy-blond hair, which was sticking up in places. ‘I understand. I’d have done the same. You need some sleep too. Tell him to take it easy on the surfing next time!’
‘Yes, I’ll tell him,’ Maddie managed as a huge wave of relief hit her and she could feel the tears threaten again.
She waited till 7 a.m. and Ed hadn’t stirred again. Her neck hurt, her feet were swollen and sweaty in her trainers and she badly wanted a shower. She wandered to the nurses’ desk and told one of them she’d be back later and left them her mobile number.
Outside the hospital, the doorman hailed a cab for her. It was a grey, overcast morning; the sun had not surfaced yet. The bars were now empty and there was a wet sheen on the pavements. It must have rained in the night. A street cleaner slowly brushed the tarmac using a wooden-handled broom. He was wearing black baggy trousers, flip-flops and a white T-shirt. His arms were bony and thin, his movements slow and deliberate.
As the taxi drove towards Kuta Beach she glanced at the stretch of sand. It was quiet, a discarded towel lay on the sand, some litter. A few scrawny cats were roaming the beach. Waves crashed down before they hit the shore, swathes of huge white angry foam breaking, spray flying upwards, then cascading down again on the beach. She shuddered. Ed could be lying on the bottom of the ocean and I wouldn’t have known.
When she got back to the room, the bed looked dirty and crumpled, but she was beyond caring; she took off her shoes and fell onto it, fully clothed.
*
When she woke up, she glanced at her watch. Eleven o’clock. The sun was streaming in through the windows. She could see streaks on the glass windowpanes of the door leading out to the gardens. She sat up in bed, her clothes damp with sweat, and rested her head on the wall behind.
She found her small case, pulled out some clean clothes and had a shower, then texted Tim to give him an update.
She wandered outside the hostel and was immediately in bright sunshine and hot, muggy air surrounded her. She squinted and saw a café across the road. She had never eaten out alone before. She took a seat outside on a red plastic chair. A little girl, no more than ten years old, in a turquoise dress came to take her order – the menu was thankfully full of pictures of food. She pointed to some scrambled eggs and a cup of coffee. The girl nodded then skipped away.
Later, she headed back to the hospital, keen to see Ed.
‘The doctor said you’d be out tomorrow.’
He nodded.
She stayed and chatted for a while, but after about an hour Ed’s eyes were drooping and the colour had drained from his face.
‘I’ll go now, Ed, OK, but I’ll phone the hospital later, see how you are. You need to rest.’
He mumbled something to her as she left and she hailed another cab back to the hostel.
As her taxi crawled along the busy main drag, fairy lights across the bars were sparkling and the outside tables were filling up in the dusky evening. The air was infused with spice, exhaust fumes and the salty air of the sea.
When she got back to hostel, Johnny was in the foyer, sitting on a bench. His hair was wet and tied back in a ponytail, sunglasses perched on his head, his board shorts damp.
He stood up when she walked towards him. ‘Hey, how’s Ed?’
‘Yeah, good. Doctor says he’ll be out tomorrow.’
‘Awesome.’
‘Yes, yes, it’s good news.’ She looked at him, noticing for the first time that he had bright sapphire-blue eyes that lit up when she told him Ed was on the mend. ‘Right, well I’m just going—’ But before she could say any more he’d interrupted.
‘Hey, why don’t you come out with the gang tonight?’
The gang?
‘Um, no it’s fine, I’ll just get a cup of tea somewhere – um, I’m pretty tired,’ she said as her stomach rumbled. ‘No idea what time it is in the UK.’ She shrugged.
She must have waited just a jot too long to reply, as Johnny quickly said, ‘What does it matter what time it is in the UK? What else will you do, sit in that crappy room?’
He had a point.
*
Her hand clutched an ice-cold beer and the condensation dripped down her wrist. She was so tired she felt as though she was hallucinating. The music thumped in time to the pounding in her head. She could feel the bass thudding from the speakers, the lights flashing in time to the music.
‘Maddie?’ Johnny was introducing her to the others. She smiled at them one by one. There was Adity, a beautiful Indonesian girl with pigtails either side of her head and a purple bandana tied around her neck; she lived in Bali but was hoping to go to Jakarta to university the following year. Then there was Po, a music teacher from Korea who was travelling for a year; he was on his way to Perth, Australia. He was short and squat with a killer smile and close-shaven head.
Johnny handed her a napkin and smiled at her. He was wearing a black T-shirt, faded blue board shorts and a silver chain round his neck. His blond, dreadlocked hair was tied back in a ponytail and his incredibly bright, blue eyes fixed on Maddie as he swivelled several leather bands and bracelets around his strong, tanned forearm. He was much older than the others. Maddie looked away as she realised she was staring.
‘So you met the main dude at the surf school up the road?’ Po offered, grinning at Maddie and Johnny.
‘Yes, thankfully he was with Ed.’
‘Yeah, he’s got a lot of experience.’ Po was nodding.
‘Yup, it’s cool running the place.’ Johnny smiled at her. ‘I worked in one in Brisbane, but – I don’t know – I wanted something more. I turned the big four-oh last year and wanted to do something with my life.’ He shrugged. ‘You know? Anyway, the red tape was a nightmare in Oz, so to run my own show, it was easier to come here. I’m learning heaps, and I’ll take my business back to Brissie eventually.’
‘And he’s very popular.’Adity smiled at him. ‘Ed’s been working there, at the shop. Johnny’s been showing him the ropes – in and out the water.’
‘So, Mads – you don’t mind if I call you Mads, do you?’ Johnny grinned at her. ‘Fancy a spot of sightseeing? Day after tomorrow? It’s my day off, from the surf school.’
‘I’ll need to make sure Ed’s all right.’ Maddie straightened up in her seat, a slightly odd sensation running down her spine.
‘Yeah, course you do. And when he’s all tucked up safe in his room resting, reading English newspapers, then you can come with me. I do an occasional food blog and there’s a new menu at a place in Ubud I want to try.’ Johnny winked at her.
Is he flirting with me? She was so tired, she was worried she was dreaming. She began to say something about not being sure when something hit her square in the eyes: she needed to be sure.
‘OK,’ she said and took a huge gulp of beer.
; After an hour in the bar, her head was throbbing. They were all talking about carrying on to another ‘joint’.
‘I’ll walk you back to the hostel.’ Johnny was on his feet.
‘You don’t need to do that.’
‘I do and I will.’ He looked down at her and something made her decide to quit arguing as he nodded to the door.
She was aware of the slap of his flip-flops as they shuffled along the pavement in silence. They had to move in and out of the throngs of tourists, people selling jewellery and asking if they wanted to buy it. A small boy with an earring stopped her in the street and held out a book.
‘You tell me.’ He smiled a dazzling smile at her. He was terribly cute!
‘What’s that?’ She bent down to take a closer look at the notebook he was showing her, but just then Johnny yanked her arm and pulled her away.
‘What are you doing?’ She stood up, annoyed. ‘That young boy looked a bit helpless.’
‘Helpless?’ Johnny laughed. ‘You need to watch out. Kuta can be a tricky place. They target newly arrived tourists.’
‘What do you mean “they”?’
‘Pickpockets.’
‘But that boy wasn’t a pickpocket!’
Johnny turned to look at her and cocked his head to one side. She studied his strong jaw, the way his T-shirt stretched across his arms. ‘Wasn’t he? They make the best ones: young, vulnerable boy asking if you can look at some English word on his “notebook” – then with the other hand carefully unzipping your money belt or sneaking a hand into your handbag to relieve you of your wallet; I’ve seen it all. C’mon, Mads.’
Back in her room, Maddie kicked off her sandals and flopped on the bed. Here she was in Bali, a bit pissed on local beer. She was here to see her son in hospital. But instead, a tall, dreadlocked Aussie had just walked her to the door. And she was absolutely, no, absolutely not slightly attracted to him. Her mind flickered to Greg. She hadn’t heard a jot, although she’d checked Facebook on her phone earlier.
As she lay on her thin mattress, pulling her nightdress off her sticky body, she wondered about her life. She wondered how she had got to this age and could be unaware of pickpockets; how a forty-something surfer could pack up his dreams in Australia, unpack them in Bali, be so street aware, have taken her son to hospital and looked after her – and yet she couldn’t really look after herself.
