Honest to fuck, I still don’t know if he’s trustworthy. I didn’t know him before he disappeared, only ever heard stories, but I don’t trust a man who would abandon his kid with a woman like that. I almost laugh to myself, the realization hitting me that I’m making a clubwhore my Old Lady, and raising a kid with her.
But Della isn’t just some whore, she’s class and so goddamn addictive. She ain’t like Savannah who was looking to be an Old Lady, didn’t matter who put the patch on her. She’s more like Esther, and fuck, Esther, deep down, she’s good and sweet. Della is too, I’ve seen it inside of her, she just doesn’t always show it to me. She will, one day, she’ll give me all that sweet, I’ll make her.
“Know of a mattress place, not a big operation like Smith, but he does enough business that what we need wouldn’t raise any flags. Only issue is that he’s based out of NorCal.”
“How north in NorCal?” Dragon asks.
I furiously write the notes down, shaking my head the entire time, wondering why the fuck we would even step a toe in that area. Trista moved to SoCal where we have contacts, but I know for a fact a different motorcycle club presides over the northern part of the state and we have no goddamn business hanging out up there and causing problems.
“Santa Rosa,” Hawk says.
I sit up with a snort. Everyone turns toward me. Lifting my gaze, I look around. “He’s fucking crazy. You’re crazy, brother.”
“How?”
“That’s Donkey Puncher territory. They make us look like goddamn law-abiding citizens. I’m not going up against them, not unless they start something first.”
“Pussy,” Eagle coughs.
Turning to him, I narrow my eyes, but I don’t say anything. He watches me, a smirk twitching on his lips, but nothing else. He’s baiting me for some reason and it isn’t lost on me the way he watches Della. The way he’s there in the shadows, in the background with her. I know he wants her, but he’s not going to have her. She’s mine.
“Not a pussy, just not looking to start a war. We got women and children to think about, our trade with New York and everything else.”
Hawk lets out an exhale, but Dragon stays silent. “We aren’t going to be doing anything there. Nothing. The mattresses will be delivered to us, just like Smith delivered them. Nothing will change in the operation, just where we get the merchandise. I’ll set it all up, we don’t even have to meet with him personally.”
There’s a moment of silence, and we all watch Dragon. His brows are furrowed as he contemplates and takes in everything that Hawk is saying.
“I want to meet him before we strike this deal. I don’t want to be caught with my pants down like with Kade. We’re in a tough spot, but it still needs to be right. What’s your connection to him, Hawk?”
Hawk smirks, his eyes scanning Dragon’s face before he speaks. “Not blood related if that’s what you’re askin’.”
“I’m not. I’m asking what your connection to him is.”
We all wait, and I can’t deny that I’m practically holding my breath to hear this play out. I want to know what his connection is too. If this is viable, it honestly does take a lot off of our plates, because all we’ll need is a new dope supplier and those are a dime a dozen. Mattresses are a little tougher to come by.
“Known him for years. When I went nomad, I met him in a bar in Oregon. He was livin’ there at the time. We hung out for a while. I worked odd jobs and he was just floating around. His family owned a mattress store. Haven’t seen him in years, but we keep in touch.
“A couple of years ago, his father died, leaving him to run the store. I know he’s hurting for income. People don’t buy from stores like they used to. They buy those Purple beds and shit online. He’d be doin’ us a solid, but he’d need us more. It’s a win-win with us being in complete control, unlike Smith, he isn’t loaded.”
Dragon nods. “Set up a meet. Get him here. I’m not going into Donkey Puncher territory with my colors, that’s for damn fuckin’ sure.”
Hawk lifts his chin, his eyes slicing to me. I watch as he smirks, but doesn’t say anything else. Shaking my head, I dip my chin and continue writing in my notebook.
“Anyone have any leads on a supplier? Silver’s old one is dead. Kade’s as good as dead as far as I’m concerned. We need someone we can at least count on to be fucking prompt. And no more fuckin’ weirdos with bitches locked up in cages.” Dragon pauses, jerking his chin toward Bones. “No offense.”
Bones snorts. “Just a little taken, but it’s cool, the slave life isn’t for everyone.”
“No fuckin’ shit,” Dragon mutters.
I bite the inside of my cheek as I think about that for a moment. I imagine Della locked up in a cage, naked and waiting for me. Completely dependent on me and nobody else. Maybe then she would be more appreciative of me wanting to claim her. Maybe then she would just fucking accept that we’re meant to be together, that what I’m offering her is better than she’ll ever have.
“Jaguar,” Dragon barks. Jerking my head, I look over to him. “You hear me?”
Shaking my head, I lift my hand and run my fingers through my hair. “Sorry, Pres, I didn’t. Got distracted,” I say, shrugging a shoulder.
“Mountain knows of someone as a possibility down in Tijuana who could possibly help out in the dope department. Need you to go down there with him, take Coyote, Hawk, and Wolfe with you. I want at least four on this trip,” Dragon announces. “Wolfe, if you think you need more, let me know. SoCal and the border there are friendly territory, but I still need to make a call, let them know that we’re going to do some business in the area.”
Everyone nods, I write the notes and curse the fact that I won’t be here to deal with Della, to make sure she understands that this is happening between us and to get her set up off clubhouse grounds in a place. This shit is all happening at the wrong fucking time.
Fucking shit.
“Hawk, make sure you get a visit in to see Trista, I want a report on how she’s doin’ down there,” Dragon barks as we begin to disperse from the room.
Fuck, that just extended our trip by at least a goddamn week.
Fucking hell.
Chapter Eight
DELLA
I make my way back to Jaguar’s room after my run-in with Charm. It’s not that she’s bothered me, she hasn’t. Sure, she’s a bitch, but only because Jaguar is giving her attention. If he didn’t give a fuck about her, if he cared more about me instead of the game he’s playing with me, then she wouldn’t feel like she’s anything at all.
Unfortunately, he’s playing with her, while playing me. I hate it, and yet, I’m stuck. She thinks she has some upper hand, but she doesn’t realize that she’s utterly replaceable.
“Didn’t know where you were,” Jaguar announces, opening the door.
He walks into the room, closing the door behind him. I don’t respond immediately, I’m still angry with him, hurt that he has no issues treating me the way that he has, but also that he hasn’t given me a real answer on wanting this baby or not. I’m not sure it would matter anyway. He isn’t letting me go, even if he doesn’t want it.
“Got tired of your whore giving me attitude,” I say nonchalantly.
He smirks, not the least bit ashamed or affected by my words. “You had my mark on you, then it would be moot, baby, and you know it,” he says, shrugging a shoulder.
Nodding, I turn my back to him and look out the window. Crossing my arms over my chest, I stare at nothingness, at the desert and dirt, the rocks in front of me, not really seeing much of anything other than brown and red blurs of color.
Jaguar’s fingers wrap around my hips, tugging my back against his front at the same time his chin dips and I feel his lips against my neck. “Gotta go on a run to California and Tijuana for a couple weeks. You’ll be okay,” he murmurs against my neck.
I’m not sure he’s asking me, more like telling me that I’ll be okay. He doesn’t really care, not that much anyway.
This is all about control and nothing more.
“I will.”
“Find us a place to live while I’m gone,” he growls, nipping my skin.
Turning around in his arms, I place my palms on the pecs of his chest and tip my head back to look into his eyes. God, I could get lost in the depths of his gaze, if it wasn’t so downright hateful, lost, and full of anger. He’s a beautiful man, but his rage, his spitefulness, it makes it hard to see anything else, to see his beauty.
“I can’t apply to rent anything, Jaguar. I don’t have a penny to my name,” I breathe.
His lips tip up into a wry smile as if that fact is something that he enjoys, immensely. He likes that I’m seemingly helpless, that he is in control and his almost giddiness about that fact frightens me. Especially with the way he’s been acting lately.
I ran from him for a reason, no matter how nice he can be, the flip side to him is just too much for me to bear. I can give up on some things, on my freedom, on my happiness, but I can’t have him leash me then not even discuss this baby, our future, and the treatment of it. That is one thing that I can’t allow, not with the way that I grew up.
“A brother can go with you. Help you fill everything out and pay the deposit and shit,” he informs. “I want this done and you moved in by the time I get home, I don’t like you here alone.”
“Why?”
His eyes darken, he dips his chin and his gaze searches mine. “You really asking me that?”
“You don’t trust me, not even a little, do you?”
His lips twitch. “You haven’t given me a reason to, babe. You ran from me, from us. I had to bring you back here, practically kicking and screaming. Plus, you’ve fucked almost everyone here. You aren’t free to whore anymore, so no, I don’t want you here with them alone, especially not unmarked.”
Pushing against his chest, I try to move away from his grip, but he doesn’t allow it. He holds onto me, refusing to allow me even an inch of space. His lips touch mine in a hard, bruising, crushing kiss. His fingertips bite into my hips, pulling me even closer. His hard length presses against my stomach and I let out a moan, hating that I love his roughness.
Jaguar wrenches his mouth from mine, his breathing coming out in heavy pants as his eyes wildly search my own.
“Bitch,” he groans. “Why the fuck does it have to be you?” he asks.
I shake my head, wishing not for the first time, that it wasn’t. We aren’t healthy, his desire for me isn’t right and my continually letting him inside of me, in resignation, isn’t either. We should stop this now, before everyone involved winds up getting hurt or destroyed in the process.
“Let me go,” I whisper.
Jaguar’s lip curls at my word and a low growl erupts from his chest. “Never,” he hisses. “Fucking never. You’re mine now and I won’t willingly let you go, not ever.”
“Even if it destroys us?” I chance asking.
He snorts. “Don’t know about you, but I won’t be destroyed by having you in my bed, Della. A sex addict gagging for my dick. A bitch who has no limits, no boundaries. Not a fucking hardship. You’ll need me, when you figure out that I’m in charge of that pussy, you’ll fucking need me and shit will change.”
His words send a chill down my spine. I hate them and I hate the fact that he’s figured me completely out. He holds the strings and I’m nothing but his puppet. It makes my stomach clench with fear, with disgust, but not just for him—for myself. I’m disgusting and filthy, I’ve brought every bit of this on myself.
“That’s not love,” I whisper.
One of his hands leaves my hip and I feel his fingers twist in the back of my hair. He tugs my head back, exposing my neck as he lowers his face. My breath hitches when I feel his teeth nip my jaw, then suck my bottom lip between them before he bites down. He doesn’t bother to lick the stinging sensation he’s caused, instead he backs me up against the window. My ass lands on the small window sill.
“I don’t know what love is,” he whispers. “Never did, don’t give much a fuck about that, either. All I know is that you’re the bitch that’s going to wear my brand, pop out my kids, and take my cock when I want you to. That’s all you do, Della. That’s your purpose now.”
Tears fill my eyes as his hand dives down my belly then beneath the waist of my jean shorts. Two fingers fill me in one quick move and he begins to pump them in and out, curling them inside of me, then pulling them out, again. Over and over until my good sense leaves me and I’m nothing but a ball of desire and need.
“Yeah,” he grunts against my mouth. “This is how I like you, Della. Fucking needy. Willing to do whatever it takes to get that relief. On edge. This is how you should always be. You get too fucking wound up when you think.”
I hate his words.
I hate him.
I need him—at least in this moment I do.
JAGUAR
Della is full of need, of desire, and I should leave her like this to teach the bitch a lesson. But I already know that there will be at least ten men downstairs willing to take care of her needs if I leave her alone and on edge. Another of the many reasons I want her isolated.
Bones has something with the way he locks his woman up, I’m thinking about it, wondering if Della would put up too much of a fight if I did that to her. Lock her in a cage while I’m not around, make her stay in there even if I am home. Make her completely dependent on me. Maybe then she’d appreciate me.
Her pussy flutters around my fingers and I know that she’s close, moving my hand from between her legs, I tug the button of her shorts open and shove them down her legs, along with her panties.
“Take my dick out, baby,” I purr against her lips.
She does as I request, reaching between us, pushing my jeans down and wrapping her fingers around my length. My hand that’s still tangled in her hair, clenches and I force her head back farther, her neck arching even more.
Moving my lips down her chin, I touch my mouth to the center of her throat as I pick her up. Closing my eyes, I allow my hips to shift forward as she guides me toward her entrance. With a grunt, I bury myself balls deep inside of her warm cunt.
“Jag,” she whimpers as her fingers wrap around my biceps.
I moan, pulling out of her until just the tip of my dick is buried in her cunt. Sliding back inside, I keep my eyes closed as I slowly fuck her against the window sill of my room. She wants it hard, she wants it fast. She wants that instant gratification, but she’s not getting it, not yet, not until I’ve had my fill of her pussy.
Slowly, I fuck her, I take her and enjoy the way she’s powerless against me, the way she needs me. Nipping at her skin, I bury myself to the hilt and lift my head from her neck. Her eyes open and she frowns as she looks up at me.
“Why do you fight this so fucking much, Della? I make you feel good, you make me feel good, why do you have to fight this?” I ask.
She presses her lips together, her gaze shifting to the side, then moving back to mine. “Because I don’t love you and you certainly don’t love me.”
“Love doesn’t fucking matter,” I spit. “Loyalty, that’s what matters.”
“You want me loyal to you and only you,” she says, though it’s more of a statement than a question, so I nod once as my only response.
She frowns but doesn’t say anything else and I’m glad. The last thing I need to do is lose my goddamn hard-on because she can’t keep her fucking mouth shut. Burying my face against her neck, I fuck her the way we both like it—hard and fast.
Her nails dig into my shoulders as I slam my hips against her body, angling them so that I hit her clit every single downstroke. She gasps, unable to scream or make much noise as I keep her neck arched. I let out a low growl when I feel her pussy clamp down around my dick. Only then do I bury myself deep inside of her and come.
No matter how pissed I am at her, how much I want to throttle her, I always make her come because I know without a doubt that she will try and find that rel
ief with someone else if she doesn’t get it from me. I’ve seen her do it before. Any time she’s left unsatisfied, she looks for that gratification that she craves.
She’s fucked up.
I’m fucked up.
Together we’ll fuck everything up, I’m sure.
She’s still clutching me, digging her nails into my shoulders as she holds onto me, her body still trembling beneath my own.
Letting my hand fall from her hair, I drop it, wrapping it around the front of her throat as I look into her eyes.
“Jaguar,” she breathes.
“We aren’t here because of love, Della. We’re here because I want you. I’ve always wanted you. Love doesn’t exist, it’s something that people invent to make their lives seem more exciting. They stay together with the illusion of some grand love they have between one another, when in reality, they are either too comfortable to find someone else, or they just want one another.”
“That sounds sad,” she whispers.
Smirking, I shift my hips, my semi-hard cock still buried inside of her body. “It’s only sad if you allow it to be that way. We’re going to have a lot of fun together, Della. We’ll never have a dull moment. You and me, we’re meant for one another.”
Her brows crease in the middle, but she doesn’t speak immediately. Taking a step back, I grunt as my dick leaves her warmth. Tugging my jeans up, I button and zip them, my eyes never leaving hers. She doesn’t move, her body frozen as she watches me.
Lifting my hand, I cup her jaw with my fingers, feeling her softness beneath my touch. “I got some shit to do to get ready to leave. You’ll be okay here without me?”
“In this room, or the clubhouse?” she asks.
I snort. “Clubhouse.”
She shrugs one shoulder and something that looks a fuck’ve a lot like doubt crosses her face. Closing the short distance between us, I dip my chin, making sure her eyes lift to meet mine.
UNLEASH ME: SAVAGE BEAST MC 4 Page 8
