by Becca Steele
“Welcome to the bowl.” Lena gestured with her arms out. “I come boarding down here when I can. But Sundays are fight night.”
“Fight night?” I stared down into the empty bowl. “Do you fight?”
Lena shook her head. “No. Not here. Only martial arts training.” A small smile appeared on her face. “The people who fight here can be a bit…crazy.”
“I didn’t even know something like this existed.”
“It’s an open secret. I think most people know about it, but we don’t really talk about it. Don’t want to attract the interest of the wrong people, if you know what I mean.”
“That makes sense.” Coming to a stop in front of the large bowl, I turned to her. “So, what are we doing, anyway?”
She smiled, tugging me to sit on the rim of the bowl, our legs dangling over the side. “We wait for everyone else to show, then you’re going to see some of the fights in action.”
Kicking at the side of the bowl with the heel of my trainers, I eyed her suspiciously. “And how exactly is this supposed to make me more confident?”
“You’re way out of your comfort zone, right?”
“Yep.” Leaning back on my elbows, I stared around me. “I feel like that’s happening more and more lately. Ever since I met you.”
She laughed, pleased. “That’s the first, and most important reason. I’m pushing you to do things because I know you have it in you, Raine. You have that confidence deep down inside you. And the more you do things that make you uncomfortable, the more confident you’ll feel.” She paused. “At least, that’s the theory.”
“Okay…” I glanced at her. “So pushing me out of my comfort zone was the first reason. What’s the second?”
“Have you ever seen a real fight in action? Some of these guys are hot. And watching them fight? Yeah, I think you’re gonna love it. And you might even pick up some tips.”
“Tips on finding a hot guy?”
“No. Fighting back.”
“Oh.” We fell silent as the area began to fill, crowds milling around and people sitting all around the edge of the bowl like we were. Suppressing my discomfort, I decided to question Lena in an effort to take my mind off the increasing numbers of people surrounding us.
“Do they do this for money?” I tried to think back over the little I knew about fights—which was pretty much zero.
“No. Mostly for bragging rights, or to settle a grudge, or just because they’re psychos who like to fight.”
I laughed. “Psychos, hey? So which of the fighters do you have your eye on?”
Her expression became distant. “None of them.” I sensed there was more to it, but I didn’t push. I was quickly learning that while she was friendly and open in certain areas, there were parts of her she kept locked up so tightly, that I knew I’d never be able to penetrate them. Not unless she chose to share those parts with me. “Hey, look. The first fight is about to start.”
I watched as two guys in sweatpants and dark T-shirts slid down the sides of the bowl and met at the bottom, then stood waiting. After a moment, a guy with a whistle appeared at the top, and the crowd fell silent as he introduced them.
“Fight one! Joshua versus Ricky! First to tap out loses!” The two guys shook their wrapped hands, then the whistle guy blew his whistle, and they began to circle each other.
Lena kept up a running commentary the entire time. “The guy with the whistle is Mack—he organises most of the events. Joshua is really powerful, but he’s quite slow. Ricky, he’s small but deadly.”
I flinched as Joshua swung at Ricky with a brutal jab to the ribs. “Ouch. That looked painful.”
“That was nothing. Keep watching.” The anticipation in her voice was clear.
Nothing? The next second, I saw what she meant. Ricky lunged forwards, lightning fast, striking at Joshua with a series of jabs that had him staggering backwards. He followed it up by sweeping Joshua’s legs out from underneath him, sending him crashing to the floor. Lena let out a cheer, and then her attention went to a guy standing across from us, watching the fight intently. She stiffened, ducking behind me.
I followed her gaze, frowning as I tried to make out his features from under his hood. His face was shadowed, but his sleeves were rolled up, revealing tattoos that snaked up both arms.
“Who’s that, and why are you hiding?” I turned to her.
“Shh. Keep your voice down.” Her own voice was low. “That’s Zayde Lowry. Remember him from school? He was in my brother’s year. One of his best mates, in fact.”
I stared at Zayde with new interest. As he turned his head slightly and the floodlights hit his face, I could see the dark, almost feral look in his icy eyes. “Ah. I remember now. There’s something scary about him,” I mused.
“Yeah, you wouldn’t want to get on his bad side,” she agreed. As Zayde melted away into the crowd, she breathed a sigh of relief. “I didn’t want him to see me, in case he told my brother I was here. Cass is alright, as far as brothers go, but he can be kind of overbearing sometimes.”
“That makes sense. So if Zayde’s one of your brother’s best friends, you must know him quite well, then?”
“Kind of, I guess. They all hang out in the same group. Like they did at school, if you remember. My brother, Zayde, and Caiden and Weston Cavendish.” The last name fell from her lips on a sigh, and I narrowed my eyes at her.
“Anything you want to share about any of those names you just mentioned to me?”
“Nope.”
“Hmm.” Unconvinced, I raised a brow at her, and she stuck her tongue out at me. Laughing, I returned my attention to the fight. I’d somehow managed to miss the end, but the whistle guy had slid down into the bowl and was holding Ricky’s hand up in the air, to the sound of cheers.
“Okay, we have a break for a couple of minutes before the next fight.” Lena leaned back on her arms, completely at ease in this place. Me, I still felt way, way out of my comfort zone, but as I looked around, I realised that no one was looking at me like I didn’t belong. People were milling around, talking and laughing, and despite the fact that we were all here to watch people fight, the whole atmosphere was friendly.
“I like this,” I decided.
Lena stared at me with a smile. “I’m glad to hear it. Any reason in particular?”
“It seems like there’s no hierarchy here. Everyone seems like they’re on an equal footing, you know?”
“Yeah. I mean, don’t kid yourself, there’s a lot of rivalry, and things can get nasty, but you’re right in the respect that everyone’s on the same level. Money and status don’t matter here, for the most part. It’s all about the fight.”
“If only it could be like that at school,” I mused.
“Yeah. But there’s always gonna be a hierarchy in school, you know? That’s just the way it is. And the ones on top can be the worst. Some people just like to make themselves feel better by putting others down.” She rolled her eyes, and it was clear she was referring to Carter and his friends.
“Yeah, I—”
“Speak of the devil, and he will appear. Look.” She leaned forwards, gripping my arm as she stared into the bowl intently. I followed her gaze to see him.
Carter. In the bowl with Kian.
“Oh, no,” I groaned. “Why can’t I escape him?”
Lena laughed. “Guess I forgot to mention that this is one of his favourite hangouts.”
“You forgot. Really.” I stared straight ahead as I spoke, unable to tear my eyes away from Carter. A tight black T-shirt stretched across his chest, and he was grinning at Kian as they shook hands before stepping apart. Kian lifted his hand, doing something to his mouth.
“What’s he doing?”
“Taking out his lip ring I think.”
“Oh.” Looking at Carter, I thought back to the night before last, when we’d made some progress. Maybe. I hadn’t updated Lena on the whole situation with him, mostly because I knew she’d have an opinion, and I wanted to w
ork things out on my own. It was something I felt like I needed to do. And I was going to confront him, once I gathered the courage.
My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the whistle, and they began to circle one another. “Why is he fighting Kian?”
“Who knows. They seem to do it a lot. Probably just blowing off steam.” Lena shrugged, unconcerned, and I returned my attention to Carter.
The previous fight had been…interesting, sure. But this? “I see what you mean about hot guys fighting.” My mouth was dry, and I squeezed my thighs together, trying to suppress the building ache.
“Yeah. Especially when you’re attracted to them, huh? This is exactly what I was talking about earlier.” She smirked at me, and I huffed.
“Shut up.”
“You and I both know it’s true. There’s no point denying it.”
“Fine, yes. I am attracted to him, and I wish I wasn’t.” I sighed. “Not with the way he acts.” Except for Friday night, I added silently.
“Yeah. He’s a dick with poor taste in girls. You’re worth five hundred Anastasias.” Lena’s words were fierce, and I smiled.
“I’m sure there’s something good about her.”
Lena snorted. “Not that I’ve seen. She’s a bitch. She lives to make other people’s lives hell.”
“I’ll take your word for it.” Tugging the hood of my hoodie up, my eyes tracked Carter as he sent a wrapped fist flying towards Kian’s jaw. Kian responded with a swift jab to Carter’s ribs, and I saw him wince, then grin.
“Not everyone is as nice as you.” Lena threw me a wink.
“Oh, I know that.” I attempted a joke, and she beamed at me.
“Ha ha.” Our attention returned to the fight, and I was mesmerised as I watched Carter and Kian exchange a flurry of blows, which seemed never-ending. “They’re so evenly matched. It’s almost pointless for them to fight,” Lena murmured.
“Maybe that’s the point,” I suggested. “Equal bragging rights at school, if that’s why they’re doing it.”
“Yeah. That, and it reminds people who’s in charge.” The whistle blew again, and the whistle guy slid into the bowl as Carter and Kian both separated, panting. The three of them conferred for all of thirty seconds, and then whistle guy held up both of their hands, to a mix of cheers and boos. I assumed the boos were from people who’d wanted to see one winner.
A sigh came out before I could stifle it, as I watched Carter rip off his T-shirt, using it to wipe over his face. My eyes roamed over his body, glistening with sweat, all his muscles pumped and defined. And the veins on his arms…
Lena interrupted my very thorough perusal. “Need a tissue for the drool?” She started cracking up, and I buried my face in my hands.
“I’m so stupid, aren’t I? Lusting after him, when he acts like such an asshole, and I know nothing can or even should ever happen between us?”
“You’re not stupid. And I wouldn’t be so sure about nothing happening. Why don’t you go and talk to him?”
I recoiled. “What? No! No way.”
“Comfort zone.” Lena gave me a challenging look. “If he treats you like shit, I want you to stand up to him. Don’t let him bully you. He wants you, and he doesn’t like that fact, and he’s taking it out on you. Yeah, you tricked him, but he needs to get over it. And you—you need to learn to stand up to him, show him you won’t take it anymore.”
“You’re right.” My voice was barely above a whisper.
“Go. I’ll be waiting. If you need me… No. You can handle this.”
I hoped she was right. Clambering to my feet, I glanced over to see him over the opposite side of the bowl, and I began to push my way through the crowds towards him.
By the time I made it over to the other side of the bowl, he’d managed to acquire a girl under each arm, and my stomach sank as I saw who the girl on the left was. Anastasia, his ex-girlfriend. I took a step back. I couldn’t go up to him now, not while she was there. The whole football team looked like they were there, too, surrounded by girls. Intimidated wasn’t even the word for it. I was way out of my depth.
Stumbling backwards, I almost fell into Preston, one of the team strikers, who was eyeing Kian with concern. “This wasn’t a good idea,” he muttered. “Either one of you could’ve been hurt.”
Kian’s reply was lost to me as Carter’s head lifted and his eyes met mine. They widened, pure shock falling across his face as he took in the sight of me standing there. I took another step back, then another, and I turned and fled, pushing through the crowds and escaping to the relative safety of the graffiti wall.
“Raine.” The low voice stopped me in my tracks, and I turned to see Carter staring at me. “What are you doing here?” He was still breathing heavily, amped up from his fight, his hair wet from the water he’d tipped all over it. He’d never looked sexier, and I suddenly found it difficult to get any air into my lungs.
“Carter.” That was all I could say, before he was right in front of me, his hands sliding into my hair and tilting my head upwards to meet his eyes. We stood, frozen in time, in this dark corner of the park.
“Raine,” he repeated, lowering his head.
“Having fun with Anastasia?” As soon as the words escaped me, I clamped my mouth shut. There was no way he hadn’t noticed the thinly disguised jealousy in my voice.
Drawing back, he studied me intently for a moment, the silence between us growing uncomfortable, before he gave a heavy sigh. “Ana’s my ex for a reason, Raine. Whatever you think you saw, you’re wrong.” He closed his eyes briefly, his lashes sweeping down, before he focused on me again. “You shouldn’t be here. Are you following me?”
“I didn’t even know you’d be here,” I said truthfully. “When I saw you fight, though…” I trailed off, realising I’d admitted too much, and he smiled as he slid his hands to my back, pulling me closer.
“You like watching me fight?” I buried my face in his chest, unable to answer, and he laughed softly. “Don’t be shy, now.” His voice lowered as he ran his hands down my back. “Tell me. Did it make you wet for me?”
My breath hitched at his words, and when he unexpectedly slid his hand down between my legs, I gasped, pushing my hips into him.
“Fucking jeans. I want to feel you.” He rubbed the palm of his hand against me, and I whimpered at the friction. “What are you doing to me,” he said, almost to himself. Then he glanced around him, seeming to remember where we were.
That was enough to snap me out of it.
Pushing him away, I staggered backwards until I was against the wall. I noticed his eyes go to the side of me.
“Little trickster,” he murmured. “I should’ve known.” My eyes followed his gaze to the painted mask, black with blue highlights. A permanent reminder of our night together. At least, until someone else graffitied over it, I guess.
A sigh escaped me, and I faltered for a moment, before pulling myself together. “We need to talk.” I injected all the firmness into my voice as I could muster, and he took a step backwards, scrubbing his hand over his face.
“Talk.” He threw up his hands. “Go ahead.”
I steeled myself, then spoke, the words tumbling out of my mouth in a rush. “Why did you get me kicked out of drama club? I know you stole the money and framed me. If you could admit it and make it right, we could move past it and have a fresh start.”
The change in him was instantaneous, like a switch being flicked. His jaw dropped and he stared at me, his eyes hardening, back to the Carter that I knew and disliked. “What the fuck, Raine?” In one movement he was in front of me, pinning me against the wall. “How fucking dare you accuse me of shit like that?” Anger vibrated through his whole body, and his hands came down either side of me. His fingers flexed next to my head like he wanted to grip my throat, but he was holding himself back.
“It’s true, though. Isn’t it?” My voice came out as a cracked whisper. “Please, Carter. Just put the money back, apologise, and we can move
on. I…I like you.”
“You like me?” His voice was low and dangerous. “You’re accusing me of fucking stealing, and then you tell me you like me? Like you expect that anything could happen between us?”
My lip trembled, but I stayed strong, meeting his eyes defiantly. “I know you want me. You can lie to yourself all you want.”
“I. Don’t. Want. You.” He snarled the words at me. “This?” His hips ground against me. “Nothing but a natural reaction. Fighting makes me horny. It’s nothing to do with you. Why would I pick you, when I could have any girl I want?”
“That’s a lie.”
He stepped away from me, his jaw clenched. “Who the fuck do you think you are, Raine Laurent?”
I gathered the tiny piece of courage inside me. “I’m the best thing you’ll never have.” Then I moved around him and walked away, tears blurring my vision.
Behind me, I could’ve sworn I heard the urgent caw of a raven, but I didn’t look back.
I was done.
18
Lunchtime in the cafeteria, sitting with the football team, I turned Raine’s words over and over in my mind. I’d spent the night unable to sleep, constantly flipping between rage and confusion at her accusation. I needed to get to the bottom of what was going on.
As if the universe was taunting me, Chris spoke up. “Who’s that?” He leered over my shoulder, and my stomach churned. Somehow, I knew who he was looking at.
“That’s Raine, you dick.” Xavier cuffed him around the head.
“Who’s Raine?” Kian looked confused. Like he didn’t know.
“She’s literally been at school with us forever. She was in your maths class for three years.”
“The one who gave half the football team a blowjob?” Chris spoke up again, and my jaw clenched. Counting to ten inside my head, I forced myself to remain calm, or at least give the appearance of being calm.
I caught Xavier’s sidewards glance at me, which I ignored. “Yeah, that was her,” I heard him mutter.
