by Sage, Aubrey
Making love to her was better than I could’ve ever imagined, and it felt amazing to finally be that close, but at the same time I was incredibly nervous about the whole thing. I loved Annie. I really did, and I didn’t want to hurt her. I didn’t want to hurt her, and I didn’t want to hurt my parents. I felt certain that I wanted to be with Annie more than anyone in the world, but how could I get myself out of such a compromising predicament?
If I hurt her right then, my life would go on and maybe the whole mess that the so-called deal had put me in would be cleaned up. If I continued with her and we let our parents know, our family would be ripped apart, but I’d be free. And if I did nothing, Satan would continue destroying me until there was nothing left. No matter what choice I made, it wasn’t going to end pretty.
We exited the shower and dried off, both of us smiling the whole time. Things felt natural with Annie, like we had been a couple our whole lives. I was overflowing with happiness, but deep inside my heart was aching, and it was taking all of my control to keep my hands from showing my nerves. I knew what I needed to do.
I fetched Annie her clothes, got dressed myself, and waited for her on the couch while she fixed her hair and makeup. She came out looking as fresh as when she arrived, but before she could even sit down, her phone began to ring.
“Hello?” she answered. “Yes mom. I’m at Mitch’s house right now. Yes, he’s okay.” She panned around the destruction. “There’s some stuff he’s dealing with now, but he’s fine. Yes, I’ll tell you about it when I get home. Okay, I’ll be back soon. Yes, I’ll drive slow.”
Annie clicked off the phone and let out a big sigh. “I really don’t want to leave, but Mom needs the car to go shopping.”
“It’s okay,” I said and grunted as I stood from the couch.
Annie walked close to me and wrapped an arm around my waist. “So Bro’,” she giggled as she looked up at me. “Should we still call each other Bro’ and Sis’? It’s a little weird isn’t it?”
I shrugged and slanted my eyes away.
“Don’t worry. I won’t tell our parents about us yet. Not until you’re ready. We can take as long as we need.”
“Annie…” I muttered.
Annie raised her eyebrows and tilted her neck back.
“I didn’t lie to about anything I said, but you know we can’t do this anymore.”
Annie unwrapped her arms from me and let them droop to her side. “Umm… What did you just say?”
“We can never tell Mom and Dad. They’ll kill us. Our family will never be the same, and if we keep this up they’ll eventually find out.”
Annie’s face wrinkled. “And you didn’t think about all that before we had sex?”
“Of course I thought about it before, but I… I mean we had a moment of weakness. It wasn’t rational.”
She thumped the bottom of her first against my chest. “Are you being serious? You think this was just some pointless fling? And you want things to go back to the way they were?”
“It’s not what I want. It’s just what it has to be. What will we do if this tears our family apart?”
Annie took a step back and closed her eyes before letting out a deep breath. When she opened them a moment later, I could see tears beginning to form. “I was right when I called you a coward,” she said sternly. “And you’re right that Mom and Dad won’t just accept us being together. I’m scared about that too. But sometimes you just have to have faith. Have faith that they could grow to understand and that things will work out. Everything isn’t always black and white.”
“But what if–“
Annie raised her hand in a signal for me to stop talking and turned for the door.
“Annie…“
“No, Mitch. You’ve said enough.” She opened the door and put one foot out. “Trying to have a relationship with my stepbrother would be tough, but having a relationship with someone with no faith would be impossible.” She slammed the door hard enough that the walls rattled.
I sat on the couch staring at the door, and I struggled not to run outside after her. No, I thought. I had done what I had to do. It wasn’t what I had wanted to do by any means. I loved Annie, but it was the path of the least amount of pain. I was doing it for her. For the family. For so long I had trained myself to run away from love that the feeling of emptiness seemed perfectly normal.
The sound of the old Subaru starting and pulling out of the driveway hummed through the open windows. And while the feeling of emptiness may have seemed standard, the ache in my heart and lump in my throat was worse than it had ever been.
I placed my head in my hands and closed my eyes tightly, knowing the decision to let go would haunt me forever.
“You did well today, Mitch,” his voice whispered to me.
Chapter 29
“I’m home, Mom,” I yelled when I opened the door to the house.
“Oh good! I’m going to run. I want to get out before it gets dark,” Mom said as she rushed through the hall and to the foyer. I handed her the keys and she eyed my face suspiciously. “Have you been crying?”
“It’s nothing Mom. I just heard a sad song,” I lied. I had been crying over Mitch the whole ride back home.
“What song? You know, I cry every time I hear that Celine Dion song ‘I will Always Love You’,” she began to sing the hook of the song as she slipped on her shoes.
“That’s Whitney Houston, Mom.”
She shrugged and stood up. “Well, whatever. I cry whenever I hear that song. Gotta go, baby. I’ll be back in an hour.” She gave me a quick hug and headed out the door without questioning me anymore about the song.
I ran up the stairs to my room, and threw myself on my bed. I grabbed a pillow and squeezed it tightly before I turned to my side and the tears started flowing again. If it had really been a song that made me cry, it would be a song about a playboy and a stupid girl.
How could I have possibly fell for Mitch? I had seen him on tabloids and blogs with countless girls, and somehow I had let him add me, his stepsister, as another notch to his bedpost. I let him take my virginity. He spoke so smooth and sounded so real that I believe him when he said he loved me. I thought I would be different than the other girls, but I guess I was just one more woman for him to conquer.
Worst of all, there was no one I could talk to about the situation. I hadn’t stayed close to any of my high school friends since graduation, and even if we still stayed in touch, how could I tell them that I slept with my stepbrother? I couldn’t talk to Mom or Dad or anything. I’d just have to get over it myself. And what would it be like when he’d come over and see the family? How could I forget everything we did?
I was on my own, and I had never felt so lonely.
Chapter 30
“Well, whoever did this was really trying to send a message. I’ve never seen a vandalism case this bad,” the insurance inspector said. He had just finished going through the mansion room-by-room, inspecting the damage.
“You can say that again,” I mused. He scribbled a few notes on his clipboard, and I tried to sneak a glance. “So is there anything that can be done?”
“Well, I’m afraid your policy doesn’t have a flood clause,” he informed me with a frown. The dark skin on his bald head reflected the light of the slowly setting sun. I couldn’t help but think of how much he looked like Samuel L. Jackson.
I gritted my teeth and slumped my shoulders.
“But,” he added. “I think we can file all the damage under vandalism.” He smiled and reached his hand out for a shake. “I’m afraid that you’re only covered up to about $300,000 in damages. It won’t cover all of your lost art, but it will repair all the damage that was done to the house and give you about $100,000 additional to replace some of your lost interior items.”
I smiled, grabbed his hands, and began shaking it profusely. “That’ll be wonderful,” I beamed. “It’s been a rough couple of days. I thought I had lost everything.”
The inspector grinne
d. “Well, sometimes things look like they can only get worse, but you just got to have faith that it’ll all work out in the end.”
I gulped and stopped shaking his hand. “Faith…” I muttered. It was the second time in two days that I had heard that word.
The man eyed me suspiciously then tilted his head from side to side as if examining my ears. “Yes, faith…” he reiterated. He tucked his clipboard under his armpit, and began rustling through his pockets. “You seem like you’ve got a lot of weight on your shoulders, Mitch.” He pulled a business card out of his pocket and held it out towards me. “This insurance thing is just my part-time job. I’m actually a church minster. He pointed towards the lettering on the card. If you want to swing by sometime, we can teach you a lot about faith.”
“Thanks,” I said, “but I’m not really really religious.”
“You don’t have to be religious to have faith, Mitch. Go ahead and take it. Think it over.”
I took the card from his hand, and he gave a slight smile before turning and walking towards his black Cadillac. I looked down at the card and flipped it to both sides but didn’t really read it. I was more focused on what he had said.
Faith. It was what Annie said I was missing, and what the insurance guy had singled out right away.
I felt relieved that the vandalism issue was resolved, but I felt too empty to celebrate. I had broken Annie’s heart, just like he ordered me to do. I knew that something positive would happen with the insurance, but not because I had faith; because I had made a deal. All the other issues would work themselves out as well, so long as I let go of love. I didn’t hope for it. It was all part of the arrangement.
I turned around and walked slowly towards the house, considering the minister’s words. Even if everything worked out financially, I’d still be a sad son of a bitch. Hell, the only time I had felt truly happy in years was the time that I was with Annie. I opened my door and stuck a foot inside before pausing.
Faith.
Why didn’t I have faith?
I slowly reared my foot back and closed the door. “Are you there?” I muttered aloud. “It’s about the–“
“I’m here,” the voice interrupted.
“Our other deal. I’ve already done half of it. Now I just tell my parents, set things in motion, and you’ll set me free?”
“That’s the deal Mitch.”
I pulled my cell phone from my pocket and began searching for a taxi number. “Yeah, can I get a pick-up at 158 Wonderland ln?” I asked when I got someone on the phone.
“Your ride will be there within 10 minutes,” the person on the other line replied.
I turned off my phone and slid it back in my pocket. “Prepare to set me free, motherfucker.”
Chapter 31
“Dinner’s ready!” Mom yelled.
I wasn’t hungry. I wasn’t hungry at all, but after spending all night and all day in bed, I knew that I had to get up and eat something or else I’d get 101 questions about what was going on with me. I pulled myself reluctantly from under my sheets and began dabbing makeup over my face to hide the redness from the hours of intermittent crying.
When I was somewhat presentable, I put on my best fake smile and headed downstairs to the kitchen table. Mom had made salmon filet with several different sides of vegetables. It looked and smelled wonderful. I would’ve been salivating if I had been in the mood to eat.
I poked at my food while Mom and Dad ate, and eventually Mom spoke up. “You never told us what was going on with Mitch, honey. You said he was dealing with some issues but never went any further.”
The last thing I wanted to talk about was Mitch. “He… umm… someone vandalized his house.”
“What?” Dad asked. “You should’ve told us sooner.”
“Why would anyone Vandalize Mitch’s house?” Mom asked.
A loud knock came to the front door.
Dad wiped his mouth with his napkin and stood from the table. “I’ll get it. Hold that thought.”
After a few seconds, I heard Dad wail, “Hey Mitch! We were just talking about you. Come inside. We just started dinner…”
My heart raced, and I tried to jump out of my chair in such a rush that I banged my knee on the bottom of the table.
“Annie!” Mom’s jaw dropped, and she looked at me with dark eyes. “What is wrong with you? Where are you going?”
I grabbed the top of my knee and flinched. “I was just–“
“Your brother is here, Annie,” Dad said proudly as the pair walked in the kitchen, and I tried my best not to show the pain in my knee or make eye contact with Mitch. I scooted back into my chair and tried to remain calm.
“Have a seat, darling. We’ve got plenty of food for you to make a plate,” Mom gestured towards the table.
“No, that’s okay, Mom.” Mitch said. “I’m not that hungry. I’ve just come here to talk to you about something.”
“What is it Mitch?” Mom replied. “Annie told us that someone vandalized your home. Is it about that?”
“No, Mom,” Mitch said. “It’s about Annie.”
My will to make no eye contact with Mitch failed, and I whipped my head towards him as soon as he said my name. His face was straight and his eyes burned a hole into me.
“What about Annie, Mitch?” Dad chewed on a piece of salmon as he spoke.
“I… I love Annie,” Mitch answered.
Mom and Dad started chuckling, and I could feel tension rising between my thighs. I felt like I was going to pee in my pants, and my heart was pounding so hard that I could hear it.
“Well, gosh Mitch. We know that you love Annie, and so do we,” Mom said. “You don’t have to come all the way here to tell us that.”
“No, I love Annie more than you think,” he muttered. He walked over to me behind my seat and placed a hand on my shoulder. I instinctively lifted my hand and placed it on his. “I love her as something more than a sister. I want to be with her… if she’ll have me.”
My stomach filled with butterflies, but at the same time I thought I was going to hurl. The look on my parent’s faces was that of complete shock. Dad dropped his fork on the plate and Mom leaned back in his chair. After our last conversation at Mitch’s house, I never expected he would come out the way that he was.
“What the hell are you talking about, Mitch?” Dad chided. “You don’t mean–“
“Yes, Dad. I want to have relationship with Annie. As a couple… She’s the only girl for me.”
“Well, that’s just ludicrous,” Dad barked and half laughed at the same.
“Where is all this coming from?” Mom asked, her face etched with confusion. “It’s not like you guys have ever been in any sort of romance before.”
Both Mitch and I were silent.
Mom and Dad fell silent as well, but after a brief moment Dad jumped out of the chair and bolted for Mitch.
“Dad I–“ Mitch blurted, but he was cut off by the force of my Dad pushing him against the wall and grabbing him by the neck. Mitch was so much bigger than Dad, but Dad wasn’t the type to back down to anyone, and he knew that Mitch would never lash out at him.
“Dad!” I screamed.
“You little shit.” Dad hissed. “What did you do to Annie?”
“Daddy stop!” I got out of my chair and pulled on the back of his shirt. “He didn’t do anything to me! I love Mitch just the same!”
“You think because you’re some rich, hot-shot football player that you can do anything you want? To think you’d go and fuck your own sister…”
“Dad,” Mitch blurted out. His face was turning red, and it was obvious he couldn’t breathe. “I can’t help who I love.” He sounded so distant, like he was fading to black.
“Frank!” Mom screamed. “Let him go!”
Dad let go of Mitch’s neck and spit on the floor. “You’re despicable.”
Mitch pawed at his neck and coughed as he tried regain his breath, and I rushed to his side to comfort him.
&nb
sp; “Can you believe this shit, Kim?” Dad started to walk back towards the kitchen table. “Our only two kids out playing doctor with each other.”
“Frank, stop…” Mom sighed.
“Did you even use a condom Annie, or are you trying to pick up your brother’s man-whore germs as well?”
“Dad, please stop talking like that,” I whined.
“Oh Christ.” Dad sat down and jammed his fork into his salmon. “We better take you to the clinic first thing into the morning for a STD test. Who knows what ‘The Wrecker’ has gone and picked up.”
“I’m not going anywhere!” I yelled.
“I’m clean Dad,” Mitch said. “I know this is a lot to take in, but I just want you to accept us.”
“Accept it? The whole neighborhood knows you two are brother and sister. What do you think they’ll say if they see you out holding hands together? Huh?” Dad asked.
“I don’t care what they say,” Mitch said defiantly. “I only care about Annie. No one can take care of her better than I can.”
Dad scoffed, “Take care of her? Okay...” He looked towards me. “Go pack your bags, Annie. If you’re going to be fucking your brother, you won’t be living under my roof.”
“No!” Mom stood up from the table, rattling the plates on top at the same time. “Don’t listen to your father, Annie. You don’t have to anywhere.”
“Are you fuckin’ serious, Kim?” Dad asked. His face was angrier than I had ever seen him. “You’re going to take their side over mine? I wear the pants in this family!”
“I’m not taking sides, Frank,” Mom said. “They’re our children. They need guidance. We can’t just kick Annie out.”
Dad leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. “Guidance.” He shook his head comically. “Here’s some guidance for you: Don’t fuck your family members!”
