Digging the Wolf: a paranormal romance (Werewolves of Crookshollow Book 1)

by Steffanie Holmes

  “Listen to your princess, Lucas.”

  I whirled around. Caleb stood in the middle of the forest path, his unbuttoned shirt flapping in the stiff breeze. At least this time, he wasn’t smirking. He looked tired, drawn out. But most of all, he looking fucking guilty.

  “You.” I hissed at Caleb. “You did this.”

  He shook his head. “I assure you…this was all the black wolf’s doing.”

  “You just couldn’t take it, could you?” I growled. “You couldn’t handle the fact that Anna chose me. So you kill that reporter, and destroy the paintings, and threaten her. Well, if you want Anna, you’ll have to get through me, and I tell you right now that—”

  “Is that any way to talk to your cousin?”

  “You’re no cousin of mine.”

  Caleb took a step closer. I bared my teeth. My hands balled into fists. The wolf bubbled below the surface, prickling against my skin. My nails dug into my flesh, becoming sharp claws. Bristly hair sprouted through my arms.

  Caleb shook his head, his eyes dark with fury. As he took another step towards me, I saw his own fur bursting through his skin. “You seem quick to cast blame away from yourself, cousin. What reason would I have for killing the reporter? How does she fit into my nefarious plan? I could just as easily ask the same questions of you. Weren’t you the one who tried to destroy the paintings only a few days ago? I was trying to stop you, if you recall. Don’t you keep a crowbar in the back of that filthy truck?”

  “I’m going to kill you!” I yelled, slashing my claws at his face. Caleb ducked back, just as my fingers sliced through the air inches from him. Caleb growled in response, his lips turning back into a scowl.

  “Guys!” Anna leapt between us. I halted, pulling back my wolf just as he threatened to burst forth. “Don’t be like this. Caleb, Luke couldn’t have done this. He was with me at the time. We were in the city.”

  “See?” I glowered at Caleb.

  “But Luke, I don’t think Caleb did this either,” Anna spoke directly to me. “It doesn’t make any sense. His whole purpose here is to establish his own pack. How can he do that when he destroys the only evidence of his claim to this place? Or when he’s got police swarming all over the forest?”

  “Well, then who else did this!” I demanded.

  “It was the other wolf,” Caleb whispered. “The black wolf.”

  “I thought we’d established the black wolf couldn’t possibly exist.”

  “No,” Caleb snapped. “You established that, because you’re so desperate to believe that I’m the culprit here. I know the black wolf exists, because I’ve seen him with my own eyes. His scent is all over that cave.”

  “You mean your scent.”

  “I don’t have to listen to this shit,” Caleb fell forward, and with a crack, his spine bent, his contorted, growing shorter and thinner, his fingers shrinking as his nails grew into long claws. A few moments later, Caleb’s red wolf stood before us, his lips pulled back into an angry scowl. He gave a defiant bark, stepped out of his pile of tattered clothing, and ran off into the forest.

  “Caleb, come back!” Anna yelled after him. She took a step into the trees after him, but I grabbed her arm.

  “What are you doing? He’s dangerous.”

  “You are ridiculous,” Anna snapped, wrenching her arm away.

  “What, me?” What was she talking about? “He’s the one who—”

  “He’s family, Luke. Do you have any idea how lucky you are to have found family when you most needed it? Instead of embracing it, you’re accusing him of all these despicable things.”

  “It had to have been him. He’s attacked you before—”

  “That was before he knew you were family. He’s telling you the truth, Luke. Your version of reality where Caleb is the bad guy makes no sense. But you’re just too stubborn to see it.” Anna turned to follow Caleb. “You just want to believe he’s the bad guy because it’s too painful trusting someone else.”

  “Anna, wait—” I reached for her again.

  She shrugged me off, tears streaming down her cheeks. “Don’t touch me. Don’t follow me. I … I can’t even stand to look at you right now.”

  “But the wolf—”

  “Don’t worry,” Anna called as she jogged away. Even though she was turned away from me, I caught the hitch of her voice as a sob escaped her throat. “As far as you’re concerned, he doesn’t exist.”

  21

  Anna

  I stalked into the forest, fuming at Luke. He was being ridiculous. This stupid vendetta he had against Caleb was endangering us all. He needed to work together with his cousin, and if me being angry at him would get him to cooperate, then it was worth it.

  However, he was right about one thing. I shouldn’t be out here by myself. “Caleb?” I called out. “It’s me, Anna. Luke’s not with me. Can you come out, please?”

  A few moments later, I heard a rustling in the undergrowth to my left. I jumped back, my heart in my chest, as a wolf’s head poked out from the brown leaves, its pink tongue panting heavily. I relaxed as I recognised Caleb’s brown eyes and reddish-tinged fur.

  “Hey,” I bent down and patted his head. “I’m glad you’re here. Would you like to walk a bit? I could do with clearing my head. And I definitely do believe there’s another wolf out there.”

  He nodded his head slightly, and the two of us headed back down the path. We walked in silence for several minutes, a smattering of rain falling through the branches and hitting my shoulders in large, cold droplets. Out here, sound dissipated, becoming larger, more full, each rain droplet and bird call and crunch of the leaves a thing of exquisite beauty, part of the orchestra of nature. I breathed deep, the peace calming my nerves.

  We emerged into a small clearing, near the edge of one of the streams that trickled through the rocky seams. Through a gap in the trees, the grey clouds bulged, heavy with water, waiting for the opportune time to let it drop on us. A steep, slippery face sloped down towards the water, and further along the stream I noticed a tall outcrop of rocks, a small dark hole inside them. I could see that in parts, the stream was almost – but not quite – narrow enough to jump over. My heart hammered against my chest as I realised this was exactly the scenario Ben had been in when he died. He’d been further north, and the stream had been wider, but the slippery rocks, the jutting, jagged edges like teeth ready to swallow you whole...

  I sat down on the rock, far back from the edge, and tried to drive away the thoughts of the past. I had far too much to deal with in the present. I patted the stone beside me. “Caleb, change back, and let’s talk.”

  He did as I asked, his fur retreating into his skin, his snout retracting into his face, the nose and lips separating, becoming the chiselled features of Caleb’s handsome face. He rolled over and stretched out on his back, clicking his fingers and exposing his naked body. “I’m here. What do you want?” He snarled at me. He didn’t bother to hide himself, his gleaming body on full display.

  “I’m sorry about Luke.” I stepped up to Caleb and met his eyes. If he was going to try and intimidate me, I was going to bite back. “This whole experience has been hard for him.”

  “Luke doesn’t trust me,” Caleb said flatly.

  “Of course he doesn’t,” I said. “He’s lived his whole life believing he was the only child of the original Lowe clan. He’s been alone, apart from his dad, for as long as he can remember. And now here you are, on his territory, trying to steal his girl.”

  “I wouldn’t have tried to take you in the first place if I’d have known he was my cousin,” Caleb growled. “Besides, it’s become obvious to me you’re not my type.”

  “I know that. But he doesn’t. His father died just recently. Did he tell you that?”

  Caleb shook his head.

  “Well, I’m telling you now. Luke is still grieving, and one thing I know about grief is that it hits different people in different ways. Some people retreat into themselves, and become a shadow of wh
o they are. Other become healers, they take care of everyone else around them, because it’s easier than facing their own pain.” I gulped as a lump rose in my throat. I didn’t want to cry now. “And some people – people like Luke – dedicate themselves to a mission, to one last crusade in honour of their loved one, because pursuing a goal in that person’s name is a way of keeping them alive.”

  “That sounds familiar,” Caleb grinned.

  I nodded. “But one thing that pretty much all grieving people have in common is a paralysing fear of losing those they love. As humans, we always feel so invincible, but as soon as you lose someone, you realise how tenuous your happiness truly is. More than anything you want to shield yourself from ever feeling that kind of pain ever again. You start pull back from people you love, but it’s hard, because you already care about them. But when someone new comes into your life – especially someone who has some tie to the person you lost – you push them away, because it’s easier to do that now than to come to care for them and lose them all over again.”

  Caleb grimaced. “This conversation has veered way into an area I’m not comfortable with.”

  “I don’t want to hear a damn word about real men not talking about their feelings. It’s utter shite and you know it.”

  “What do you want me to do about this?”

  “I want you to talk to Luke. Find a way to make him trust you. Otherwise, he’s just going to keep finding reasons to doubt you, and he’ll either drive you away from here, or kill you, or become so distracted that he gets killed by this other wolf. None of these are things I want to happen. He has to learn to trust again, to love again. It’s the only way he’ll ever be truly free.”

  Behind me, a loud bark clipped the air.

  Caleb and I whirled around. Luke sat upright on the edge of the trees, a front paw raised in a kind of tentative greeting. My heart pounded against my chest. He’d heard the entire conversation.

  I jabbed Caleb in the side. “Luke…” he began, then cleared his throat. “I guess…I’m sorry about jumping on Anna before. I didn’t know she was family. I’m not trying to kill her, or you, or take her from you. I swear. I told you about my stepfather, how he treated me, how he drove me away. All I want is a pack of my own, and I think you and I, together, could form that pack. But for now, all we really need is for you to trust me. Don’t waste your energy watching me, waiting for me to screw you over. I’ve got your back, man, focus on the real enemy.”

  Luke glanced up at his cousin. I couldn’t read the look in his eyes. Then his gaze flicked over to me. He turned tail, and bounded away into the woods.

  “Luke!” I leapt to my feet and dashed after him. Behind me, Caleb called out, but I ignored him. I needed to find Luke.

  He slowed down to a fast walk, and I was able to follow him through the trees. “Where are you taking me?”

  In response, Luke flicked his head over his shoulder, licking his lips.

  Luke ran all the way back to the camp. Judging by the amount of cars parked across the road, the police had arrived. All the lights in the caravan were on, and I could see people moving around inside. Luke nudged the flap of my tent, and I lifted it up for him. He darted inside, and I followed.

  “Why did we come back here?” I asked.

  Luke sat on the bed, and changed back into his human form. “Because, unlike Caleb, I didn’t want to be naked in the middle of the forest.” He grinned, grabbing my hands and pulling me down beside him.

  “This is serious. That wolf is still out there. Do you get that now?”

  “I am deadly serious.” Luke wrapped me in his arms and kissed me fiercely.

  I melted into the kiss, the warmth of his mouth against mine lighting up my whole body. The ache in my core flared to life, and all my conflicting thoughts went fuzzy. “But…shouldn’t we do something…the wolf…”

  “He’ll be far away from here right now, with all the police around.” Luke pulled my shirt off my shoulders. “Right now, the only thing I can think about is being inside you.”

  “What’s brought this on?”

  “You mean aside from you being completely amazing? Oh, probably the fact that even though all this shit is going on and you’re in danger, you’re trying to get me and my cousin talking. You’re always thinking of me, Anna, trying to make me happy. Apart from Dad…” Luke’s fingers stroked my cheek, “…no one’s ever done that for me before.”

  “And that makes you want to fuck me?”

  “It makes me want to make you just as happy as I am. And I know a great way of doing that.” Luke nibbled on my ear. Sparks of desire flew across my skin.

  “And Caleb…do you forgive him…”

  “I haven’t decided.” Luke lifted my thermal underwear over my head, his hands skimming over my skin. “I’m not thinking about Caleb right now.”

  “Luke—”

  “Anna,” Luke whispered against my lips, his eyelashes fluttering against my cheek. “I love you.”

  I love you.

  The words froze in my mind, like three enormous icebergs penetrating deep below the surface. Cold crept into my body, driving out the heat of Luke’s embrace. My eyes flew open. Luke had stopped kissing me – he stared at my intently, his green eyes ablaze with love.

  I didn’t see him. Instead of Luke’s face, I saw Ben, his earnest features frozen forever in my mind, his face in the morgue, blotched and broken. I loved him and he left me. My ears buzzed. This can’t be happening.

  “No.” I choked out.

  “No?” Luke’s mouth curled down. He looked unsure.

  “I can’t…I have to go…” I grabbed my thermal top and yanked it back over my head. My heart pounded against my chest, and a sharp pain stabbed at my stomach, as though someone were twisting a knife into my guts. I can’t do this…I can’t lose another…I’m not strong enough...

  Luke reached out to me, but I kicked out with my leg, hitting him harder than I intended right in the solar plexus. He bounced back against the air mattress. “Ooof, hey, what’s wrong?” Luke’s face fell completely.

  “I have to go.” I shoved my feet into my shoes.

  “Wait, Anna. Let’s talk about this—” Luke reached for me again.

  “Get the fuck away from me!” I screamed, panic rising in my chest. Luke recoiled, as though I’d hit him. The knife in my stomach twisted deeper.

  The look on his face tore my heart open. I needed to get out. I grabbed my keys from on top of my bag and raced from the tent. Luke yelled after me, but I didn’t look back. I couldn’t bear to see him fall apart.

  “Hey, Anna. Where are you going?” Ruth called out as I fled across the site towards my mini. “The police need your statement—”

  Ignoring her, I slammed the door shut, and gunned the engine. My Mini bounced away from the site. The panic clawed at my throat. I had to get away from the forest, away from Luke and Ben and my father, the men who would not let me be free.

  22

  Luke

  “Anna!” I yelled after the departing Mini. She didn’t look up, didn’t stop the car. The Mini’s wheels squealed as she nailed the corner at top speed, the tiny car carrying away the only woman I’d ever loved.

  My chest ached. My whole body shuddered. I felt as though I’d been run over by a lorry. She left. She left. The shock of it juddered through my veins.

  “Luke?” Frances’s voice pierced through the pain slicing across my skull. I was dimly aware I was standing in the middle of the camp, completely naked. But I couldn’t bring myself to care. I wiped my hand across my lip. I could still taste the sweetness of her kiss there.

  Anna left me. I told her I loved her and she fucking left.

  Anger seized me, a rage that rumbled from my toes right up through my whole body, a bubbling heat that seared me inside and out. Fuck her. Only a few minutes ago she’d been telling Caleb that stuff, and now she’d just left.

  My eyes pricked with tears. I blinked them away angrily. I hadn’t felt that sensation
in a long time, not since I was a kid. I hadn’t even cried when Dad died. But watching Anna run away, watching her abandon me just as I was ready to open up to her almost destroyed me.

  “Luke, what’s wrong? What are you doing?” I became aware that Ruth was jogging towards me, her gaze scanning my whole body. I tore myself away, and raced back to my own tent. I yanked on trousers and a jacket. Ruth poked her head in the door. “The police are going to need your statement about the caves—”

  If Anna was going to run away, let her run away.

  I shoved my way past her and headed into the trees, not even paying attention to where I was going. All I could see were angry red welts. My fists clenched and unclenched, the tension rippling through my body. With nowhere to go, nothing to direct it at, my rage simmered below my skin, the wolf inside threatening to go completely berserk.

  As soon as I was far enough away from the camp, I found a spot on the edge of the limestone seam running along the stream. I leaned against a tree and started undoing my shirt. I’d fold up my clothes and hid them in the branches, and then I could let the wolf loose. I needed to run, to burn off this horrible, sickening feeling.

  “A little chilly for skinny dipping?” A voice shattered my private thoughts.

  “Fuck off, Caleb.” My hands froze on the button. “You are the last person I want to talk to right now.”

  Caleb stepped out from behind the tree. “Wrong. I am exactly the person you need to talk to. Because I’m the only one who can tell you when to pull your head out of your arse.”

  He still hadn’t found any clothing. I was really not in the mood for discussing my feelings with a naked man. I turned away from him. “This is none of your business. Why did you follow me, anyway?”

  “Because I saw Anna drive off from the camp, and she was crying, and I figured you must’ve done something to upset her. Although, you’re a Lowe, so you’re probably used to women seeing your cock and cowering in fear—”