Mistletoe Baby

by Tanya Michaels

  David glanced at the plate that was threatening to bow under the weight of the food he’d heaped on it. “It’s not that… Okay, maybe I got carried away. But-”

  “But what?” Arianne asked.

  But I’m eating for two now? Was that what David had been thinking? A silly old-time cliché that was hardly applicable in her case since the baby was probably the size of a small lima bean. The baby. Rachel found herself grinning foolishly. Lima bean or not, it was still her baby.

  “Rach? David? One of you going to tell me why you’re behaving so strangely?”

  “Nothing strange,” Rachel said, her voice breathy. Miraculous, wondrous, unexpected, but not strange. “I just…haven’t had a chance to eat today. Got caught up in that special scrapbooking project, and David’s trying to look out for me.”

  “Which my wife,” David intoned, “does not always have the good sense to appreciate.”

  She shot him a warning look. “Maybe I’d appreciate it if you trusted me to look out for myself. I might even appreciate looking out for someone else, not that you ever seem to need it.”

  He frowned, bemused. “So, what, you’re upset that I’m self-sufficient and successful? I thought women looked for stuff like that in mates. I married a crazy woman.”

  “Ummm.” Arianne stood. “I think I’m just gonna go hang out with Vonda.” She crossed the room to where the feisty septuagenarian was entertaining people with tall tales about her father and uncles trying unsuccessfully to brew their own alcohol during Prohibition.

  Gesturing toward the spot his sister had just vacated and looking somewhat abashed, David asked, “Mind if I sit there?”

  A little, but it wasn’t as if she could make him sit on the floor without it appearing weird. Then again, he’d just called her crazy so maybe she was entitled. “Suit yourself.” They still had a number of prenuptial festivities, a family Christmas and the wedding itself to get through-she could be mature about this. Even if being so close to David exasperated her, aroused her and made her want to cry all at the same time. He’s right. I am a little crazy.

  Amy and Steve arrived a few minutes later, and guests went back for second helpings. Thirds, in the case of a few of the guys. Once everyone was stuffed, Amy declared that it was time for the Soon-to-be-Newlywed game and passed out little pads of paper and pencils so that everyone could write down their answers.

  Tanner leaned over to Lilah and loudly whispered, “No one told me there would be a quiz!”

  She laughed. “You sound like my students.”

  Amy explained that she was going to ask each couple the same questions and they would jot down a response, then compare at the end to see which pair had the highest number of matches.

  Arianne smirked at Quinn from her folding chair across the room. “How awesome would it be if we won?”

  Lilah laughed again. “I’m pretty sure I’d be traumatized to learn that two of my bridesmaids are more compatible than my husband and I.”

  “We playin’ for money?” Vonda wanted to know.

  Amy shook her head. “Just gloating rights.”

  “That works, too,” Vonda said gleefully.

  The first question was, Where did you meet? Rachel thought back to the diner where she’d seen David, the memory so vivid she could smell chicken-fried steak cooking. His smile had been bright enough she could practically sunbathe in it. The second question, What’s your song? was more difficult.

  She frowned. “What if you don’t have one?”

  “Make something up,” Arianne called back. “That’s what I’m doing.”

  Lilah giggled. “You’re both lucky. I first fell for Tanner in the era of boy bands and mix tapes. What seemed soulful to me then now seems cheesy enough to serve on crackers.”

  “Hey!” Tanner glanced up from his pad of paper, looking offended.

  Lilah kissed his cheek. “But I like cheese.”

  Rachel continued staring at her own piece of paper. She and David hadn’t dated long enough to go through the courtship rites of stuff like mix tapes. Everything for them had happened quickly. Except getting pregnant. She knew girlfriends in college defined a couple’s song by what had been playing on the radio the first time they had sex, but there hadn’t been music on in the background when she and David made love. It had been at his old apartment, on a rainy afternoon.

  In a whisper so faint even she could barely hear it, David murmured, “‘Raindrops Keep Fallin’ on My Head’?”

  Rachel blushed. Somehow knowing that they were both reliving the same interlude was nearly as intimate as the act itself had been.

  “Hey,” Steve objected from the other side of the room. “No signaling partners over there.”

  Next they had to remember when they last kissed each other. Rachel warmed at the memory of this morning, pressed against the wall of Winnie’s hallway, feeling her body come back to erotic life after numbingly frustrating months of hibernation.

  “Can Ari and I be excused from this one?” Quinn asked wryly.

  While everyone was chuckling, Rachel stood. “I, ah, just need to borrow your restroom, Sandra, but you guys go ahead and play without me. I’m happy to let someone else win the gloating rights.”

  David narrowed his eyes at her. “Quitter.” His tone was light, but she read a wealth of accusation into it.

  Had she been wrong to leave? It had seemed so agonizingly clear at the time, but in the wake of this morning’s news and the flood of memories this afternoon, Rachel was confused. She knew that she and David had loved each other, but she also knew that they had problems, not a misunderstanding over whether one of them had flirted with someone else or an argument because one of them never put their socks in the hamper. Could they meet each other’s emotional needs without hurting each other?

  Still, it was seductive, the what if? that whispered in her ear as she watched Lilah open presents later that afternoon. Sandra had repeated the old wives’ tale that the number of ribbons the bride broke foretold the number of children the newlyweds would eventually have. At the mention of babies, Rachel found herself unconsciously rubbing her abdomen. If David gave her time and space to figure out what she wanted, if he could truly hear her perspective and understand it, could this be them in seven or eight months? Surrounded by friends, grinning at each other, eating off pink and blue plates with booties printed on them instead of pale gold plates with interlocking rings?

  She just didn’t know. If David really thought she was a crazy quitter who got overemotional and didn’t appreciate what a good thing he’d had…well, then, no wonder he hadn’t fought to save their marriage.

  Chapter Seven

  Just going for a run, nothing more. Definitely not stalking. The rationalization had seemed more convincing in the foyer of his own house as David laced up his running shoes Monday morning. After all, he went jogging at least three times a week. No ulterior motives there. Of course, he didn’t normally go in an endless loop up and down Winnie’s street, hoping for a glimpse of his wife.

  Was she still sleeping, like most of the neighborhood, or had the dogs already awakened her? Was she experiencing nausea? Rachel hated to throw up. He supposed everyone did, but she’d fought it during the flu and one bout of food poisoning when he’d reminded her she’d feel better if she just got it over with. He wished he could bring her a cold cloth or glass of water or something.

  David hated feeling useless, helpless. The way he’d felt for nearly a year.

  It had been so frustrating watching his wife slip away, becoming practically a stranger. Once upon a time, they’d tackled problems together. Since the miscarriage, everything had changed. If he could have suffered it for her or shielded her from that loss…But there’d been nothing he could do. She’d seemed so unreachable, and he’d felt angry and impotent. Eventually she’d suggested they try again, she’d started smiling on a daily basis and, although most people assumed she was all right, she hadn’t been the same. After being so frustrated at being shut
out, neither had he.

  David had wondered if what they were doing-the medical appointments, the physical side effects of the treatment, the emotional and financial cost-was worth it. He and Rachel had a lot of love to give and it seemed as if adoption would be so much easier. When he’d told her that, she’d distanced herself even more. Her emotional rebuffs had infuriated him, reducing him to a glorified sperm donor. She couldn’t talk to him, couldn’t lean on him anymore, but she could expect him to jump into her bed when the ovulation kits said it was time?

  Pride. Was he really going to throw away a life with the woman he loved just because she’d hurt his feelings?

  He’d handled this all wrong. When she’d told him their marriage was faltering, that she didn’t think she could do this anymore, he’d honestly thought some distance might be good for both of them. Deep down, though, he’d never accepted it as the end. He’d believed-just thinking it made him feel petty, but Rachel’s absence was forcing some hard truths-he’d believed she would see how much she needed him, that she’d blamed him for things that weren’t his fault and would come home. He would forgive her, wait a respectable period of time, then try to persuade her to pursue the reasonable course of adoption.

  Her walking out had hurt his male ego, stunting his emotional response. Other than snapping at her once or twice, he’d barely had a response. How much time did he have to repair his mistakes-nine months? Less.

  There was a light on in Winnie’s house now, and he stared at it, hoping no one mistook him for a prowler. What if he didn’t have until the baby was born but only a matter of weeks? Would Rachel follow through on her plan to leave after the wedding? What if she didn’t intend to have the baby in Mistletoe?

  David’s heart raced, and it had nothing to do with his so-called run. Pure, unadulterated panic coursed through his veins. I have to get them back. She’d fallen in love with a take-charge guy who’d taken one look at her and set about wooing her. He was still that man.

  And he refused to lose his wife.

  “WHOA.” May let out a low whistle as she glanced from the front door to Rachel, who was installing a new ink cartridge in one of their printers. “Since I haven’t had a hot date in months, I’m guessing those are for you.”

  “Guessing what are for me?” Rachel asked cautiously.

  “Half of Natalie’s shop, by the looks of it.”

  Former Mistletoe High cheerleader Natalie Young was the majority owner of the local flower shop and in charge of floral arrangements for Tanner and Lilah’s wedding. Someone had sent flowers? Rachel left the printer and joined her co-worker at the counter. Whoa didn’t begin to cover it.

  “Delivery for Rachel Waide.” The cheerful delivery boy was barely visible behind the profusion of pink roses, white tulips and smaller graceful yellow flowers, all arranged with greenery in a crystal vase that probably weighed a ton.

  May was practically vibrating with excitement. “That’s her! She’s Rachel.”

  While Rachel stood frozen in shock, the other two settled the flowers atop the counter. May nudged her.

  “I think you’re supposed to sign for them.”

  David. A guy didn’t send his estranged wife flowers, did he?

  Then again, maybe she was reading too much into this. Maybe he was simply excited over their news. She’d been so awestruck that, even though she’d felt bone-tired, she hadn’t been able to sleep. She’d spent the night awake, staring at the ceiling, wondering how many months before she could feel the baby move, daydreaming about nursery themes and a little girl with David’s blue eyes or a little boy with his smile.

  Her doctor’s appointment was tomorrow afternoon; she’d e-mailed David with the time and suggested they meet there. This bouquet was probably a platonic expression of joy. She plucked the card from the plastic holder in the center of the flowers. He’d written the note himself; she knew his handwriting as well as she knew her own.

  Congratulations! I’m sorry I couldn’t find flowers as beautiful as you are, but I hope this paltry offering will still demonstrate how happy I am.

  (I’d be even happier if you came home.)

  Love, Your Husband

  “Do I get to read it?” May asked, unrepentantly nosy.

  “It’s personal.” And inappropriate. It was impossible to let David off on the platonic-joy defense if he was going to sling around words like beautiful and your husband.

  “Okay, I get that it’s personal,” May conceded. “But we’re friends. You could tell me anything in confidence. You know that, right?”

  “Like what?” Rachel was a little taken aback by the intense, meaningful glances her boss was giving her. Since no one knew about the separation, her husband sending flowers wasn’t that notable. He’d done so once or twice on special occasions. “I’m not having a steamy affair with Paolo or anything.”

  May’s eyebrows shot upward. “Who’s Paolo?”

  “Nothing, nobody. Imaginary male stripper.” She needed to call Arianne back about the bachelorette party. “I just meant, the flowers are from David.”

  “To celebrate a happy event, maybe? Or a happy future event you’re expecting?”

  How does she know? Rachel’s bewilderment and her tacit admission must both be readable in her expression because May laughed.

  “Oh, honey. When I walked in here last week with that fish sandwich, you turned positively green. And Mindy Nelson saw you in the women’s aisle at the grocery store. She said you were acting nutty. We’ve both had our fingers crossed for you all weekend.”

  Perhaps the conjecture had been unavoidable, but Rachel wished David hadn’t cemented the gossip with flowers. She was still in the statistically dangerous first trimester. One of the worst parts of the miscarriage had been running into people who somehow hadn’t heard the news yet, having to suffer through the painful well-meaning questions and the awkward strain once she told them.

  “Don’t get too excited just yet,” Rachel warned.

  But her words seemed to have the opposite effect on May, whose eyes brightened. “So you do at least think you’re pregnant?”

  “I don’t know for sure. Even if I am, I’m not ready to tell people. You know the first trimester is…” She swallowed, unable to dwell any more on that horrific possibility. Instead, she switched tactics. “David and I don’t want anything upstaging Lilah and Tanner’s wedding.”

  “Oh. I think they’d be too happy for you to mind, but you guys are being really considerate.” May mimed locking her lips and throwing the invisible key over her shoulder. “You can count on my discretion, sweetie. Mindy will just have to speculate alone. I won’t confirm a thing.”

  Rachel would prefer no one was speculating anything about her at all, but that was asking too much in a town this size. “I appreciate your keeping the secret.”

  “Don’t mention it.” May grinned. “It’ll be fun knowing something no one else does. Well, besides you and David, of course. You want me to make myself scarce so you can call him?”

  “Actually.” Rachel’s fingers tightened involuntarily, and one sharp edge of the card scraped her skin. “Do you think you could spare me for a little while?”

  “Absolutely! You take any time you need.”

  “Great.” Rachel reached for the coat she’d hung on the brass rack by the counter. “I think maybe I should go thank him in person.”

  AS SHE’D EXPECTED, Rachel found David seated at the desk in the private office behind Waide Supply. He glanced up with a smile that bordered on cocky, sending her temper through the roof.

  She didn’t yell, not with Arianne and Zachariah just on the other side of the wall, but her tone was pointed. “Have you lost your mind?”

  “No. Why, have you found one?”

  And now he was making jokes, not taking her seriously at all. “You sent me flowers. At work!”

  “Well, it seemed like the best place since it’s where you are during the day.”

  “David!” She leaned forward, braci
ng her hands on the desk. “This isn’t funny.”

  His boyish smile would have melted a weaker woman. “Not even a little? Come on, most women get mad when their husbands don’t send flowers.”

  “You’re not my husband anymore,” she said in desperation.

  His humor-filled features hardened so quickly that it made him look like a different person. “The hell I’m not.”

  “You know what I meant. We’re not married in the typical sense.”

  “We could be,” he coaxed. “Don’t you miss me, Rach? I miss you.”

  His tone was as dangerously addictive as really good chocolate. “Don’t.”

  “Why not?” He rose from his chair, bracing his own hands on the desk and angling toward her. They were practically nose to nose.

  Because she couldn’t recall him claiming to miss her before he’d heard she was pregnant. Tears pricked her eyes. Was this how she’d thoughtlessly made him feel all those months they’d been trying, as if his primary value to her was as someone who could give her a baby?

  He ran his thumb across the top of her cheek, the stroke sending shivers of sensation through her. “Don’t cry.”

  “Don’t send me flowers.” She straightened. “You might as well have taken out a billboard on Main Street telling everyone I’m pregnant.”

  “You’re overreacting. It was just a basic floral arrangement. It’s not like I sent one that came in a ceramic bassinet.”

  “No, but May and Mindy Nelson have both figured it out.”

  “Oh.” He grimaced. “I like both of them, but if they know, the news will have spread all the way to Atlanta by morning. We should go ahead and tell my fam-”

  “No! No, I’m not ready for that.” She remembered the pitying glances and unsolicited platitudes from before. If, God forbid, anything should go wrong with this pregnancy, the fewer people who knew, the better.

  “We shouldn’t tell anyone. Not yet. Can we just get through this wedding first? Then we’ll figure out the appropriate way to handle it.”