Harold followed her down the stairs to the living room. She peeked out the living room window, watching the sunset. The wind was blowing like crazy and ... she jumped at the next crack of thunder.
She went to the drawer, starting her pre-date ritual, and pulling out the two postcards Aiden had sent her—one from Italy and one from Belize. Both broke her heart. Even though they weren't much more than “thinking of you", both had raised her hopes just as she'd begun to accept that he was gone. But nothing ever followed the postcards, and eventually she was right back to square one, in love with someone who didn't want her anymore and with her heart obliterated.
She tried not to think of the nights she'd cried herself to sleep. Then the bargaining and the anger and how she alternated between hating and willing to give up anything—including a kidney—if it would bring him back. It was during that phase that she couldn't even bear going out into the garden they'd created together, and she was overdosing on the music of Toni Braxton and Celine Dion.
Inevitably, she'd resigned herself to the fact that although she loved him, he was gone. It didn't have to mean her life was over. In a way, Aiden Grand had actually been the beginning of her life. He gave her confidence and courage, and it was experiencing him that made her finally realize that perhaps she actually had something to offer. Maybe there was a man out there who would appreciate the small things about her that Aiden did. The way she laughed, the way she ran her fingers over his back. She smiled.
The way I bit him.
She ran her fingers over her shoulder, remembering that first time with him. Then she closed her eyes tight and shoved away the memories. She had a date in twenty minutes, and she couldn't let her memories of Aiden ruin it.
She shoved the post cards back in the drawer and rubbed her hands together. Another crack of thunder sounded, giving her second thoughts about going out. The thunder was unnerving her. When the doorbell rang, she drew a deep breath and shoved the last remnants of Aiden's memory to the back of her mind.
Until she opened the door and found him on her doorstep.
"Why are you here?"
As many times as she'd imagined this moment in her head, she never imagined the anger she now felt raging in her heart.
"I missed you. Cassidy, I...” He tugged at his ear, looking almost sheepish. “Can I come in?"
She stared at him, unable to utter a single word. Harold brushed past her, jumping excitedly at Aiden's ankles. He scooped the little dog up, and Harold instantly covered his face with doggie kisses. The scene attempted to melt her heart, but despite what she wanted, she'd worked too hard to go back. Even if he was in town for a week or a month, he'd still leave, and then she'd be heartbroken again. She wasn't willing to go back to that kind of pain again.
"I have a date, Aiden. Now's not a good time."
His gaze snapped to hers. She allowed the annoyance to penetrate. His shocked look, as if she couldn't get a date other than him, fed her anger and that was the best defense she could think of.
"A date?"
She stiffened. “Yes."
They stood staring at one another. She wanted so badly to fidget, but wouldn't allow it. She held his stare, serene in the knowledge that she'd done nothing wrong and wouldn't feel guilty, even if he did look hurt. She couldn't imagine he'd been celibate since he crawled out of her bed.
The sound of tires crunching on gravel drew their attention. She held her resolve and looked back to Aiden. He gave her a sad smile and handed her Harold just as Jerry climbed the stairs, looking confused.
"Jerry, Aiden. Aiden, Jerry.” She gave a tense smile as the men shook hands. “Can you just take Harold inside, Jerry? I'll be right in."
Although he seemed somewhat confused, Jerry took the dog without question and went inside. When she stepped aside and got close enough to Aiden to catch the scent of his cologne, she nearly had second thoughts.
The wind and thunder welcomed the first few drops of rain. It was nearly dark now, so she reached in and flipped on the porch light before pulling the door closed, holding the knob behind her back, trying to keep her distance and sanity.
"If you'd called..."
He drew a long breath and ran his hand through his hair which was beginning to glisten with rain drops.
"I'm a bastard, Cassidy."
A small laugh escaped without thought. She stopped herself from apologizing. He gave her a wry smile that enhanced one dimple and left her breathless.
"I meant literally."
She shook her head, confused.
"I know that Aiden. I remember."
She remembered, of course she remembered. She remembered everything he'd told her, everything they shared, but she wasn't going back.
Another loud crack of thunder interrupted him. Cassidy decided it was for the best. She didn't want to hear whatever it was he was about to say.
"Look Aiden, I need to go."
He took a step towards her, wrapping his arms around her and grabbing both her hands. She lost her ability to breathe and found herself battling her intense desire to fall into his arms.
"I was afraid, Cass. Of everything I felt and of my family. They grudgingly allow me into their ranks because my father demands it. He loves my mother to this day, but Cass, they can be exceptionally cruel. I didn't want to..."
"Aiden, it doesn't matter."
She wasn't entirely sure where he was going with this, but she was weakening and that was dangerous.
"It does matter! I love you. Love you! There hasn't been a single day I haven't thought of you, missed you, craved your touch, your kiss, your scent. I'm not whole without you, Cass. I realized the Grands, the whole damn lot of them aren't worth losing you over. I need you. I want you. I love you."
She was numb. The wind and the rain weren't distracting enough that she missed what he'd said, but it was so out of left field, she had no idea what to do with it. It was everything she'd dreamt, but...
"I've got a fucking date inside, Aiden!"
He took a step back. She missed him immediately, but stood her ground. “When you left me, you destroyed me. I've never felt so much pain in all my life. I cried every day, every night for weeks! You can't just come back, say ‘I'm a bastard, and I love you’ and expect everything to be the way it was."
The rain was starting to drip form her hair, she wiped it away.
"I can't do this now. I'm sorry."
She went inside before she changed her mind. He'd more than just broken her heart when he walked away—he'd obliterated it and cracked her soul as well. He didn't get to just come back and say I'm sorry ... Wait, had he even said he was sorry?
She wasn't sure. His words all blurred now.
"Are you okay?"
She looked up at Jerry blankly, as if she'd never seen him before this second. She heard Aiden's car engine rev. “He's leaving."
"Good, I really wasn't in the mood to share.” He smiled.
Even though she knew he meant it flirtatiously, all she could think was that Aiden was leaving, again, but this time it was her own damn fault. “I'm sorry."
He took a step closer and reached for her. “Don't be, we still have the entire evening."
She opened the door, headlights still shone on the driveway, it wasn't too late. “No, Jerry, we don't. I'm sorry.” She ran out heedlessly into the rain, which was pouring now, but she hardly cared.
"Aiden! Wait!” By the time she'd gotten to the driver's side door he was already climbing out. “I love you, too."
Both dimples flashed at her just before she flung herself into his arms. He held her so tight she wasn't sure how her lungs were still able to expand, but it felt so damn perfect she didn't care.
As the rain drenched them, he whispered in her ear, “I love you, Cass. Spend your life with me."
She pulled back enough to look into his eyes. Rain dripped off his hair and ran down his face. He kissed her. A deep passionate kiss that lit her desire, stirred her soul, and sent the butterflies tumblin
g over themselves.
When he pulled back, he rested his forehead against hers. “Marry me."
She shivered and not from the fact that she was now dripping wet. He gave her a wicked smile.
"You naughty girl. First, say you'll marry me, second, get rid of Larry..."
"Jerry."
"Whatever, he's outta here.” He kissed her again, and then whispered against her lips, “Then fuck me till the dawn breaks."
Her breath stuttered as erotic images raced through her mind.
"I can't think of anything better. Yes. To all of the above."
THE END
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