“No, I haven’t, although when I was fifteen, Mr. and Mrs. Billings offered to take me back to see the city. Now that I’ve learned my parents’ names, I’d like to go back to see if I can find their graves, any church records, and their home, if it’s still standing.”
If in the future, Wesley was able to contact Lucy, maybe they could travel to New York City and visit the area and look for their parents’ graves too. Although being poor immigrants who were murdered, they might be in unmarked graves.
“If you could work for a hotel somewhere else in Kansas, we could still see you now and then.”
“Maybe, but I don’t have more than two months’ experience working in a hotel. I’d be better off being a farmhand, or herding cattle somewhere,” Wesley mused.
Although he enjoyed wearing clean clothes all the time for his job instead of being constantly dirty from working out in the elements. He’d had a taste of a nicer job and lifestyle, and he’d prefer to stay with it.
“Whatever you decide to do, please know that we all support you.”
Wesley drained his cup and set it down on the desk. “I know. I just have to decide what’s best for me and my future. Thanks for talking me out of my ride.”
“You’re welcome. Sorry, the weather didn’t cooperate, though. I have a new horse who needs a workout whenever you feel like riding again. It’s a young gelding raised by Hilda Wilerson, and it’s got spirit besides the racing background her horses are known for.”
Tobin studied Wesley a moment, deep in thought.
“Have you ever thought of courting any ranch girls, like Hilda’s daughter, Greta? You’ve met her in church. I think your days would never be dull since she has the same spunk as her mother.”
“Oh, I’ve met Greta, but I prefer someone a little more refined and mannered. Greta is outspoken, doesn’t care about her appearance, and could beat me up if she wanted to,” Wesley spoke with awe in his voice for the strong woman.
“Then best to let Nadine cool her heels a while. And then try again, or not if you feel it’s not the right time. I hear it will be a busy time at the hotel with the Thanksgiving community dinner and then all the Christmas festivities next.”
“Yes, there’s lots to do to get ready for the holidays, but I look forward to it. We’ll have much better holiday meals than the ones we ate while we were in the army.
“Oh, no comparison there, I’m sure. I can’t wait to celebrate Christmas with our kids and the Brenner family. Molly says I need to quit buying gifts, but I’m having too much fun to quit,” Tobin beamed with excitement, which could rival a child looking forward to Christmas morning.
“Thanks for reminding me to start shopping. Even if Nadine and I aren’t on the best terms by then, I want to give something special to the younger daughters,” Wesley said as he buttoned his coat back up.
“Thanks for the talk and coffee, Tobin. I feel better talking it out, even if I don’t have a solution.”
“Give Nadine a little time. Women are known to change their minds,” Tobin suggested as he opened the door for Wesley to exit his office.
Yeah, that’s for sure. Maybe Nadine would push him into the closet and kiss him when he arrived back at the hotel.
Not likely, but they’d stay civil and polite because they worked together. That’s just how Nadine was raised.
Wesley opened the door to the outside of the livery, now glad he hadn’t gone on that ride because the weather had worsened. It might turn warmer tomorrow, but today’s weather felt as miserable to his exposed skin as his heart did from Nadine’s tirade.
He trudged with his head bent against the frigid wind back to the hotel, anxious to get back to his desk. Wesley needed to retrieve the letter off the floor to keep the Smith’s address for future correspondence because Wesley would try again, after giving them a little time to think about Lucy having a brother they didn’t know about.
Wesley enjoyed the welcoming heat of the lobby when he arrived back at the hotel. Although his first thought was arriving back “home” because the Paulson Hotel had become his home and the Paulsons his family since moving to Clear Creek.
He hung his hat and coat on the coat rack in the office before walking around the desk to where the letter had slid off.
It wasn’t on the floor where he thought it should be. Then he noticed the trash can had been emptied because he’d thrown a couple dozen envelopes in it before he stormed out of the room.
Wesley got down on his hands and knees, looking under the desk and around all the office furniture. He sat back on his heels, realizing the letter must have fallen into the trash can and been thrown out. Wesley got up and hurried out the back door of the hotel to the alley, where they had a big steel barrel to burn their trash. Flames flickered out of the top of the newly lit barrel. He sighed, knowing his mad reaction to the letter made him lose it. But it didn’t matter, he knew the man’s name if he decided to contact him again.
But he felt like he’d lost his sister a second time as he walked back into the hotel. How he wished he could seek comfort from his troubles with Nadine. But, at the moment, she was lost to him too.
Chapter 10
“Nadine? I have something to show you,” Phoebe hesitantly said as she leaned against Nadine’s bedroom door.
“What, Phoebe? I’m tired, and I’m ready for bed,” Nadine said, although she was far from sleepy, thinking about how things had been strained during the evening meal.
Wesley had sat down long enough for their saying grace together, filling his plate, take a few bites before rising, saying he’d finish eating at the front desk.
Nadine brought him a piece of chocolate cake for dessert, but he just thanked her and turned back to his paperwork, not saying another word to her.
She’d started to say she was sorry for not believing in him, but he held up his hand, stopping her in mid-sentence. Nadine was too choked up by his dismissal to say anything, so she left the office.
Elise spent the evening with Avalee and Gordon, and Nadine wondered if it was due to Nadine’s rude comments when she found her and Wesley together in the closet. Nadine wanted to apologize and explain to both Elise and Wesley how she jumped to conclusions, but both seemed to be avoiding her.
“I was cleaning out the trash can in the office this afternoon, and the whole stack of envelopes Cecilia and I had written for Wesley was in the can.”
Nadine looked at Phoebe when she said that.
“Why would he throw the envelopes away? I know he appreciated you writing them out for him.”
“Probably because this was under the stack,” Phoebe slowly held a letter out to Nadine.
“I wasn’t snooping, but the address on the letterhead was a hotel in Kansas City, and I was curious.”
Nadine took the letter and scanned it, realizing what it meant. Wesley had found his sister, but her father forbade him to have any contact with her or the family.
“Why didn’t Wesley say something about this at supper? Do you think Mama or Papa know about this?” Phoebe said, concerned for Wesley’s feelings.
“I don’t know, but maybe he doesn’t want people to know he couldn’t see her.”
“I bet he’s really sad now. Maybe you should go talk to him, Nadine?”
Nadine thought about that, but they weren’t on speaking terms at the moment, unless it had to do with work.
“I’ll keep the letter for now, but please keep it a secret, Phoebe, since he hasn’t mentioned it yet.”
Phoebe nodded to comply. Her little sister had come to love Wesley as her big brother and hated to see him hurt. Nadine hated Wesley was sad, too, but it was because she had very deep feelings for him. Maybe it was time to acknowledge she loved the man. And she needed to do something to set things right between them.
“Mama, can I talk to you a moment?” Nadine asked as she walked into the living room.
“Of course, dear. I’m waiting for your papa to bring me my nightcap, but he’s taking his time as usu
al,” Helen smiled.
Nadine wanted what her parents had, a happy marriage, a loving family, and a profitable business. And she was beginning to realize she saw Wesley in the role of her husband.
“Has Wesley said anything about his hunt for his sister?”
“Not a word, but I assume he will if he ever finds out. It has to be frustrating to think Lucy might be in the state, but not knowing where. I’m surprised he hasn’t asked for time off to go to Kansas City to look for her. Why do you ask?”
She had the letter in her skirt pocket, but now she hesitated to show it to her mother.
“Just curious. He seemed quiet tonight at supper.”
“Well, I think part of that might have to do with you, dear daughter,” Helen said as she reached for Nadine’s hand and pulled her to sit beside her on the settee.
“Want to talk about it?”
“No. Yes,” Nadine replied as tears started to threaten to fall. “Mama, I’ve fallen in love with Wesley but messed up my chance with him by being jealous when he was around Elise.”
“Which wasn’t very hospitable to Avalee’s niece either,” Helen pointed out.
“And your advice, besides apologizing to both Elise and Wesley?”
“What do you want to happen between you and Wesley? You have to figure that out, Nadine. You’re an adult, and thinking about marriage is very, very serious because it will affect the rest of your life, and Wesley’s if you marry him.”
Nadine took a deep breath. “I want to see the future, but I’m scared. What if something happens to him like…” Nadine stopped and looked down at their intertwined hands.
“Like Ivan, my first love,” Helen sighed and looked away a moment before turning back to Nadine.
“You never know what will happen in your lifetime, Nadine. I never, ever imagined the War Between the States would happen to our country, let alone have a major battle take place in our little community of Gettysburg.”
Her mother had never said much about that painful time in her life. She was only twenty years old and pregnant with Iva Mae at the time.
The July 1863 three-day Civil War battle killed thousands of soldiers, horses, and left thousands more wounded. And because her mother’s family farm was south of Gettysburg, their land was covered with the dead and injured when the battle was over.
Her mother walked the fields until finding her husband, father, and two brothers among the dead. And then she had to help bury them and tend to the wounded too because they were only the community members to do it.
“We all die when it’s our time, Nadine. But I would have killed myself from the shock of the aftermath of the battle if not for the baby growing inside me.”
“If Wesley would happen to die at a young age, you’d find the strength to carry on for the sake of your children. It’s just the way mothers are.”
“Would you have stayed with Arvid Lindsmeir, if he hadn’t had a heart attack?”
The man was in his sixties when her mother married him, again for the sake of her children.
“Yes, I did love Arvid, but in a different way than Ivan. He was so kind and considerate, even if he was decades older than me. If he hadn’t died, Luella, and possibly you, would have been his daughters besides Avalee.”
“And we could have still been in the hotel business in Pennsylvania instead of Kansas,” Nadine added, thinking how different life would have been for her family.
“Oh, but then I wouldn’t have met your papa,” Helen’s face lit up. “Think what a chance he took on me , with four daughters? And disobeying Grandma Paulson, too.”
Grandmother Paulson was known for being set in her ways—and her way only—until Luella, a sweet, adorable two-year-old with a club foot melted the older woman’s heart.
Nadine’s grandparents retired and moved out of the hotel into a house in town when her parents married. They were constant visitors to the hotel, unless they were traveling and until they passed away.
“Did my sisters have as much trouble deciding to take the chance to marry as I am?”
“Each of your sisters had different circumstances. Iva Mae taught school for years waiting for shy Gabe Shepard to court her. One New Year’s Eve party, she announced she was going to marry, even if Gabe didn’t ask her. She sent an advertisement to a mail-order agency, and Frank Dolecek answered it.”
“And Maridell ended up marrying Frank and moving to Wilson when Gabe asked Iva Mae to marry him.”
“Yes, Maridell left Clear Creek, but it is okay if you move away too if that’s your worry,” her mother told her. “Out of eight daughters, I’m sure some of you will live elsewhere, but we can always visit each other.
“Avalee was scared to marry too, because of my past, but she and Gordon are a strong couple now, each carrying on their own work. I’m proud of Avalee being Doctor Pansy’s assistant.”
“And then there’s Luella and Tate,” Nadine laughed, thinking of those two being best friends since they were toddlers.
“Now I knew they were a pair destined to be together forever. And I wouldn’t doubt they started kissing each other in grade school,” her mother shook her head in wonder.
“And what is the fate of your next four daughters, Mama?”
“Whatever you want it to be, Nadine. If you think Wesley could be your mate for life, then make it happen. He’s hesitant to move forward because you’ve been stalling.”
Nadine took a deep breath and straightened her shoulders. She knew what she needed to do to make things right between her and Wesley.
“Mama, I know Thanksgiving is just a few days away, but could I take a few days off to visit Maridell?”
“You need to get away to think about all this? I understand, and we’ll manage with you away, but not until after Beth’s birthday party. You and Wesley are in charge of that, and I assume everything is ready for tomorrow evening?”
“Yes, Mama. Beth’s party has been organized, and we’re ready to surprise her,” Nadine said confidently. She didn’t tell her mother she ended up doing all the work, though, instead of Wesley helping her. It was Nadine’s fault that had happened.
“Maybe I will wait and leave Monday, so I’m around for the weekend guests. Then I can travel back with Maridell’s family when they come for Thanksgiving if that’s all right with you.”
“Perfect. I’m glad you decided to travel during the week instead of being gone on the weekend. Just like a hotel manager would think, right?” Helen teased her.
Nadine nodded; still a little bit hurt her mother didn’t name her assistant manager instead of Wesley.
“Nadine, even if we name a man an assistant manager in this hotel, remember a Paulson woman is always still in charge,” her mother said with a wink.
Nadine openly laughed, instantly feeling so much better than she had since Wesley started working at the hotel. Her mother had raised her to be strong and in charge, but to wisely share the workload, burdens, and joys with her husband and daughters.
“If, on your trip to think about your future, you decide it isn’t to be with Wesley, please let him know. He needs to move forward with his own plans too, be it here at the hotel and Clear Creek, or elsewhere.”
“You won’t fire him if I decide we aren’t right for each other?”
“No, Nadine. That wouldn’t be professional. Wesley is a good employee, and you’d work together as fellow employees. Is that clear? I’m speaking as the hotel manager instead of your mother at the moment.”
“Yes, Ma’am.”
“Good. I raised you right. Headstrong and loyal,” her mother gave her a hug as her father walked in with his tray of their night refreshments.
“Will you tell Papa what we talked about?” Nadine whispered to her mother while they were still hugging each other.
“Only if you want me to, but if not, it stays between us.”
“It’s okay if you do, but I just don’t want all this to get back to Wesley.”
“Not a problem. I’ll
make sure your little sisters keep quiet too in case they listened in on our conversation.”
Nadine groaned, worrying that Cecilia or Phoebe was in the hallway listening to her spill her worries to their mother.
“Listen, you did the same thing to your older sisters, and they all survived your tattling. You will, too, with your little sisters.”
“Everything all right here, ladies?” her father asked as he set the tray on the table in front of the settee.
“Of course, Ethan. Nadine wants to visit Maridell for a few days next week, and I assured her you would be fine with it.”
Yes, her mother was in charge of everything, and Ethan still loved her dearly, playing along with the roles they’d laid out in their marriage.
Not that Nadine wanted to be in charge of Wesley like her mother was with her father. She wanted to be Wesley’s partner in life and in their work.
But first, she had to do something to prove to Wesley she loved him.
Chapter 11
Nadine took a deep breath, and then another before knocking on the door of the house. The stone home was in a nice part of Kansas City, which was a relief since she was going to tell her story to complete strangers. Otherwise, Nadine would probably have left with the cabbie instead of getting out of the carriage and paying the driver.
Nadine grasped the large brass knocker on the front of the door and knocked three times. As big as the house was, she didn’t know if anyone would hear her knock right away.
Would the occupants have house help? That was the possibility for an older couple.
The door creaked open, and a woman in her early fifties answered the door.
“May I help you miss?”
“Is this the Smith residence, Ma’am?” Nadine asked as she looked in the foyer behind the woman.
“Yes, it is. I’m Mrs. Smith. And you are?”
“I’m Miss Nadine Paulson, and I’m here to see Miss Lucy Smith, if I may,” Nadine said, hoping she didn’t just ruin her chances to find out about Wesley’s sister.
Nadine Trades Her Partner Page 6
