Damn. In or out of bed, the effect was the same. I was ready to take him home for some makeup sex. Except that I no longer had a home here, so … his place, then.
“How about some dirty Russian talk?” I said softly. “If you can do that, I’ll be yours forever.”
“I can do that, baby. Anything for you.”
Sadie Says
Sixty Days Single Falls Short
Have you ever been looking for something and discovered something entirely unexpected? Finding those cute sunglasses you lost when you were really just trying to find your other shoe? That happened to me recently, but on a much grander scale.
Since losing my parents and younger brother Seth in a plane crash ten years ago, I’ve been alone. You wouldn’t have known it to look at me. I have an amazing aunt who moved across the world so I could finish my last three years of high school without moving. Some friends of mine are my family in my heart, whether we’re related by blood or not.
But still, I felt alone. I always felt like the life I wanted was just out of reach. Like I was on the outside looking in as friends found the men of their dreams, got married and started families. I wanted that, too, and I put my mind to finding it.
Regular readers of this column know how far I took my search for Mr. Right. Blind dates. Speed dating. Internet dating. That time I went out with the insurance adjuster who made a lame comment about a nice trunk while he was supposed to be surveying my wrecked car but was instead staring at my backside.
In November, I realized I’d become the kind of woman I despised – clinging to the hope that a man would come along and complete me. I wanted to remind myself that I’m pretty fabulous on my own. So I decided to stop dating altogether for 60 days. This cold turkey approach actually came as a relief. Trying too hard is exhausting.
I wasn’t very far into my two men-free months when I started developing feelings for a man I initially despised. Well, more like crushed on briefly and then despised. My point is, I wasn’t supposed to like this guy. He was cocky. He teased me. He wasn’t looking for a relationship.
And the same was probably true for him. When you can have your pick of women, why would you undertake the challenge of snarky, sarcastic Sadie Alexander on a 60-day dating hiatus?
He didn’t set out to break me, and I didn’t set out to break him, but somehow it happened. For the first time in my life, I’m deeply in love. The kind of love that makes me smile every time I think of him. The kind of love where we talk about our future, and nothing sounds better than living a life together instead of alone.
I can never replace the family I lost. I will always miss them. But I’ve come to realize that part of the reason I want my own family so much is because it’s a way to honor them. My parents showed me what it means to have a loving relationship. Because my mom told me she loved me every day, I’ll do that for my children someday. If I ever have a son, I plan to name him Seth to remember my freckled little brother with a huge smile who once made me cry with happiness when he scored the game-winning run at a baseball game.
Readers, words can’t express how thankful I am that you’ve embraced me and my musings on life in this column. I hope you’ll stay with me as I move on from being a single girl to a girl who’s madly in love with a hockey player.
EPILOGUE
6 months later
I wound my hair into a bun and wrapped a ponytail holder around it. My neck was soaked with sweat – this kitchen had to be at least 85 degrees.
But my future mother-in-law, Anya Vereshkova, didn’t seem to notice. She was a woman of few words, and I often had trouble understanding the ones she said anyway. I loved watching her face when she was cooking. She pursed her lips and furrowed her brows when she was deep in concentration.
She nodded at a dish she was pulling out of the oven and smiled. It was kielbasa and cabbage, and I returned her grin over its post-oven appearance. She went to the sink and mopped a sleeve across her sweaty forehead.
This wasn’t my first time cooking with her in the kitchen of the Chicago apartment Niko had bought for her and his father. It was a main floor unit with no stairs and a gourmet kitchen. Given that it looked out on one of the city’s most beautiful parks, I knew it had set him back quite a bit of money.
But money was no longer on Niko’s list of worries. He’d gotten a lucrative five-year contract with the team at the close of the season. His first move had been relocating his parents here to be closer to us. Then he’d paid for his youngest brother Alexei’s four years of college.
He was in a very contented place when we’d been sitting on the roof of my building shortly after that, snuggling in a swing as the sun set over the city. I’d been stunned speechless when he slid a platinum band with a round yellow solitaire diamond onto my finger.
“Marry me, moye solntse,” he’d said softly. I’d smiled, whispered ‘yes’ and reached for his cheeks, needing to feel him with my own hands to be sure it wasn’t a dream.
And now, a month later, I was preparing his birthday dinner with Anya. It was good that I’d taken the whole day off work, because that was how long preparing this meal was going to take. I was now a staff columnist at my paper, and I had an office, which blew my mind every time I walked into it. I’d also been contacted by a literary agent who thought my columns would make a great book. Life had never looked better, and now I had Niko to share it with.
Anya eyed the dough I’d been kneading the way she’d shown me, giving a nod of approval. I’d taken my engagement ring off so it wouldn’t get dough stuck in it, and I pulled it from my pocket and put it back on my finger.
When she reached for my hand to admire the ring, Anya’s face glowed. Her eyes were shiny as she admired the glistening stone.
“You’re a good girl, Sadie,” she said in her heavily-accented voice. When she patted my cheek warmly, it was my eyes that grew shiny. I hadn’t realized just how much I missed a mother’s love until that first time Anya had wrapped me against her stout body in a hug.
Niko walked into the kitchen, his eyes widening with delight as he took in the spread. We’d baked what Anya called ‘black bread’, which was a dense loaf of rye. I was still working on the cake that was like nothing I’d ever baked before. It had dough and hazelnuts and would be topped with poppy seeds.
“I should turn 26 more often,” Niko said, bending to kiss me. “Thanks for cooking for me, you two.”
His mother didn’t even acknowledge the thanks. I was learning that this was how she cared for her family. She cooked for them, and never considered it a favor or special occasion.
I wrapped my arms around Niko’s neck, pressing myself against his damp t-shirt.
“I’m sweaty, baby,” he said. “I’ve been running in the park.”
“I don’t care. Hold me.”
He wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me close. My feet left the floor as he stood up. He kissed me again, and Anya gave a tsk of disapproval. She didn’t approve of public displays of affection, but when I turned to glance at her, there was a smile playing on her lips.
“I love you,” I said against Niko’s lips. “And I plan to make you this cake for every birthday you have until the day I die.”
“You mean until I die,” he corrected. “I’m dying first, remember? Can’t live without my sun.”
“I can’t wait to marry you,” I said.
He pulled back a little, his eyes taking on a serious look as they met mine. “I don’t want to wait a year,” he said. “Let’s get married sooner.”
I furrowed my brow. “I don’t see how we can get married during the season, baby. Your schedule is so full.”
“Before the season,” he said, and I realized he’d been thinking about this. “Next month. In a beautiful old Russian church.”
Anya looked over at us, her brows arched hopefully. She and Niko’s father hadn’t been back to Russia since leaving with their children 20 years ago. He was still recovering, but was mobile now. They were alread
y talking about opening a deli in Chicago.
“Okay,” I said, grinning widely. “I’d love that. There’s no better place to marry my Russian than Russia.”
He smiled, about to pull me close when I stopped him.
“Wait,” I said, mentally calculating. “That might be Dell’s third trimester. Can she fly then? I need Dell and Kyler there.”
“We’ll make sure we have it when they can be there. Sooner than a month if we need to. And we can honeymoon over there, too. I already talked to your Aunt Sal, she’ll be there whenever we have it.”
“You called Aunt Sal? How?” I looked into his dark brown eyes, touched by the gesture.
“I got her number from your phone when you were in the shower yesterday morning.”
I squeezed my arms around his neck tighter, my excitement building. “Next month! There’s so much to do!”
“We’ll get it all figured out,” he said. “You just focus on finding the dress of your dreams.”
I couldn’t keep the goofy grin from my face. Dress of my dreams? That was the easy part. Finding the man of my dreams had been the challenge, but I’d never been more certain of anything in my life. I had a family now – and I couldn’t wait to make it official.
Author’s Note
Thank you so much for reading Drive! If you’ve been with me for the entire Fire on Ice series, I hope you’ve come to love Ryke, Kate, Melody, AJ, Luke, Dell, Kyler, Niko and Sadie as much as I do. Is there one more book in this series? I think maybe. I have a story brewing in my head for Orion, but I haven’t worked it out for sure yet. I’ll be writing a standalone novel next, but I’m open to one more book in the Fire on Ice series. Thank you for supporting my work by reading it. If you enjoyed Drive, I’d greatly appreciate an honest review at the site you purchased it from.
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Acknowledgements
Like all my books, Drive wouldn’t have been possible without my village. First and foremost, thanks go to my readers. I wouldn’t be an author without your support, and I’m so grateful to you for helping me grow and continue to explore the stories and ideas that move me.
My critique partner Jane Koscielak is a huge source of support and inspiration to me. She reminds me that if you surround yourself with people you admire, good things will happen. Beta readers Denise Sprung, Chelle Northcutt, Michelle katzTan, Carrie Jones, Pam Million and Rosarita Reader took the time to help me build this story into its finished product. I owe an enormous debt of gratitude to all these women.
My friends in Random Moon Books give me the advice and encouragement that keeps me going on a day to day basis. I admire and respect each of these authors and am proud to call them friends.
Katrina Kirkpatrick and Karla Sorenson are author friends I can’t imagine not having in my life. Support from fellow authors is crucial, and I’m so grateful for their wit and wisdom.
The women in my reader group, Rothert’s Readers, make me smile and motivate me pretty much every day. I consider each of them a friend, whether we’ve met in real life yet or not.
I also have professional help that helps me create my best possible product and allows me to focus on writing. My assistant Pam Million keeps me focused and tracks all the details for me. Cover designer Steven Novak of Novak Illustrations makes covers and graphics that help me illustrate my vision for a story. Formatters Jason and Marina Anderson of Polgarus Studios put the final polish on the story to make it deliverable and readable to you. And my publicists at Chatter PRdpg help spread the word about my work, not only sharing my enthusiasm for it, but sometimes topping it.
The biggest thanks go to my husband and our three boys. I love you all so very much. Living my dream wouldn’t be nearly as meaningful without having our family to share it with. I’m so grateful to have a husband who supported my books back when they were costing us money rather than making it. I hope I’m showing my boys that anything is possible. Work hard, dream big and never stop believing.
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