He made a soft snorting sort of noise. “You drag Marcus down here, too?”
“No. He stayed in Seattle.”
“Well, at least one of you has some sense.”
“He sent his…condolences. Said if you need anything, you should let him know.”
“I need to get out of this bed and get on with my life. I’ve got work I need to be doing.”
“Sorry. Don’t think he can help you with that.”
Tanner swore. “You shouldn’t have come. I’ll be fine. You didn’t need to come.”
“There was no way anyone could stop me.”
“Well.” He cleared his throat and gruffly confessed, “It’s good to see you….”
She bent close enough to brush her lips on the bandage that covered his head. “Good to see you, too. You really look awful.”
He chuckled—and then he moaned. “No kidding. And don’t make me laugh, okay? It hurts too damn much.”
Marcus sat on the neatly made bed in the master suite. It was after midnight. He’d stayed at the office as long as he could.
But eventually, he’d had to come home to this empty house.
He ran his hand over the smooth fabric of the gray quilt. Sleeping alone, without Hayley. It would be bad.
But really, how much worse could it get? The past few nights had been grim enough. In bed together, with both of them wishing they weren’t.
She could have called. Just to say she’d gotten to Sacramento all right.
Though he knew that she had. She’d flown there in his plane, after all. And he’d given orders that he was to be informed when they landed. He’d even had a car waiting, to take her to Kelly’s, since Kelly had the keys to the apartment.
He stared out the window at the lights on the lake, not really seeing them, thinking that Hayley’s lease wasn’t up till June. Kelly was supposed to make arrangements for a sublet, and Tanner was handling selling Hayley’s five-year-old compact car. The movers hadn’t even picked up her things yet. And her furniture was still there, wasn’t it?
She could walk right back into her old life without missing a beat. If that was her plan.
Had she left him? Was that what was really going on here?
He shut his eyes, blocking out the sight of the lake, closing his mind off from the idea that she wasn’t coming back, that he could have lost her, that their future consisted of a divorce and a custody agreement.
Give it time, he thought. We both just need a little damn time.
Hayley made herself call Marcus the next morning at eight.
“Hey,” she said after his hello.
“Hey. So. You got in all right.”
“Perfect. Thanks for arranging for the car.”
“No problem. How’s Tanner?”
“He’s a mess. And he’s mad. He’ll be flat on his back for a while.”
“But he’ll be okay, in the end?”
“Yeah. He’ll pull through fine. The doctors say everything should heal up good as new.”
“Tell him to take it easy.”
“It’s not like he has a choice—but yeah. I will.”
“How’s Jenny?”
“Fine.”
“Good.”
“I’m…well, I think I’ll stay on here. Stick by Tanner, until he gets through the worst of this….” Tomorrow she would call Goodwill and the movers, let them know she was putting off clearing out the apartment. And she would also call the painters up in Seattle, tell them she was canceling the job for now. She added, “It’s just for a while….”
“A while,” he repeated. But he didn’t ask how long a while might be. The silence stretched. And then he said, “All right, then. Goodbye.”
And the line went dead.
Hayley clutched the phone against her chest. She should call him again. Right now. Tell him she’d changed her mind, she was coming home tomorrow. She should say that she hated what was happening between them and she longed only to work things out, make it better, make the silence and the distance go away.
But then Jenny cried.
Hayley set down the phone and went to get her. And somehow, later, Hayley couldn’t quite bring herself to make that second call.
Two weeks went by before Kelly started asking questions. Tanner was out of the hospital by then, getting around on crutches with great difficulty, since he also had that broken arm, constantly complaining but also swiftly improving.
It was Saturday. The sisters sat at the round table in Kelly’s kitchen. Jenny cooed in her bouncy seat and DeDe was down the street at a girlfriend’s. Candy, DeDe’s ancient dog, lay curled on the rug in the corner.
Chocolate chip cookies cooled on a rack on the counter and a plate of them, still warm, sat on the table within easy reach.
“Okay,” said Kelly. “I keep trying to figure out a smooth way to say this….” Hayley knew what was coming. It was. “What’s going on? Is there a problem between you and Marcus?”
Hayley stared into her mug of decaf. “Long story.”
Kelly waited for her to continue. But she didn’t. “What? You don’t want to talk about it.”
Slowly, Hayley shook her head. Then she made herself meet her sister’s eyes. “Thanks. No.”
“God, Hayley. I don’t like this. I worry, you know?” Kelly’s hand rested on the table.
Hayley put her own hand over it. “Don’t. It’ll all work out.”
Would it? It didn’t really look that way.
Everything was all wrong, yet Hayley did nothing. She took care of her baby and spent time with her family.
She was waiting. But for what?
She had absolutely no idea.
Two weeks and two days after Hayley took Jenny and went back to Sacramento, Adriana started calling Marcus again. On his new cell number.
It wasn’t a surprise. Whatever detective she’d hired would have found his new numbers for her.
He lucked out the first time she called. He was in a meeting, so she got bumped to voice mail.
Later, when he checked messages, hers was waiting.
“I know that she’s left you, Marcus, that she took that baby you didn’t even want and went back to California. I know everything. And I’ve been waiting. For your call. But I can see you’ve decided to continue being stubborn. To make me pay. Because of Leo. Fine. I’m a patient woman. Within reason. But eventually you will have to come to me. And when you do—”
He stopped the damn thing there and erased it. He didn’t need to hear the rest. He knew it already. It was pretty much the same message she’d been sending since he was four years old.
After that, he checked the display before he picked up any ringing phones. She left a lot of messages. He never played a single one of them back, just hit Delete and got on with his life.
Such as it was.
Sunday, the twenty-eighth of January, Jenny was six weeks old. Kelly offered Sunday dinner and Hayley was happy to accept.
After the meal, Hayley used the spare room to feed Jenny. The baby was through eating and Hayley was changing her on the bed when there was a tap on the door.
“Come on in.”
It was Tanner. Leaning on his crutches, he stuck his head in. “Got a minute?”
She pressed the tabs on Jenny’s diaper. “Sure.”
He hobbled in, braced both crutches against the wall and shut the door behind him. His arm had healed quickly, but he still wasn’t comfortable putting much weight on his broken leg. He leaned against the door frame for support. “Hayley…” He looked down at the floor, or maybe at the removable cast.
“All right.” She snapped Jenny into a sleeper. “What’s the matter?”
He cleared his throat and lifted his dark head with some reluctance. “Kelly and me, we’re worried about you. And Marcus.”
She picked up the baby and put her on her shoulder. Gently, she rubbed her little back. Jenny yawned and put her head down with a contented sigh. In a minute, she’d be sound asleep, ready for a long n
ap in the playpen Kelly kept in the corner for Jenny’s use when they visited.
It took so little to make a baby happy: food, a clean diaper, a pair of loving arms….
“Please don’t worry,” Hayley said. “Yes, we’re having problems, Marcus and me. But there’s nothing you or Kelly can do about it.”
“Kelly says you won’t talk about it.”
“That’s right. I…well, talking won’t solve anything. I’ve got nothing to say, really.”
Tanner frowned. “I don’t believe that. I mean, don’t women need that, to talk? I never met a woman who didn’t have a whole hell of a lot to say about whatever was bothering her.”
“Tanner.” She shook her head. “You get the feeling you’re out of your depth here?”
He actually chuckled. “Oh, well. Yeah. Guess I am—but I just wanted you to know…”
“What?”
“Well, I could call the guy. Have a talk with him, if you think maybe that will help.”
“And say…what?”
“Hell. Whatever you want me to say.”
“It’s good—” she gave him a smile “—to have a big brother.”
He grunted. “Glad you feel that way. And you didn’t answer my question. Want me to have a talk with him?”
“No. But I do appreciate that you care. That you want to help. Right now, though, there’s nothing you can do.”
“I can break his face in. How ’bout that?”
She chuckled. “Not an especially constructive approach.”
“Damn it. I hate to see you hurting.”
“Thanks. But it’s my problem.”
“Gotta tell ya. You don’t seem like you’re doing a whole lot to work it out.”
“Tanner. My problem.”
He muttered a swearword. “You’re damn stubborn, you know that?”
“Maybe.”
“Uh-uh. No maybe about it. When you finally get ready to, will you talk to Kelly?”
“I will. I promise.”
He jumped on his good foot as he levered his crutches under his arms. “Well. Guess there’s nothing else to say….”
“I mean it. Thank you. For trying. For…caring.”
“Work this out,” he commanded gruffly.
She only smiled at him fondly and turned to put Jenny in the playpen.
The next day, Hayley went to see her gynecologist for her postpartum checkup.
She got a clean bill of health and a prescription for progestin-only birth control pills, which were safe for nursing mothers. The doctor told her to begin taking the pills right away. She’d be fully protected against pregnancy within a month. And the doctor also gave Hayley a complimentary box of condoms to use until the pills took effect.
Great. She was ready for anything, free to have all-the-way, unrestricted, wild and wonderful sex at last. Too bad there was no one to have sex with—unrestricted or otherwise.
It was just so pathetic. At home, Hayley put Jenny down for a nap and then sat on her bed and cried.
The waterworks didn’t help in the least. Finally, after sobbing for an hour, she called Kelly, who came over during her lunch break.
Hayley told all.
Kelly handed her yet another tissue and declared, “Sorry. I don’t believe that husband of yours is, was, or ever will be cheating on you.”
Hayley blew her nose for the hundredth time that day. “I know he hasn’t cheated. That’s not the point.”
“O-kay. Then the point is…?”
“Kelly. He lied to me. It’s the one thing I wanted from him, the one thing I asked for. Honesty. But still. He lied.”
“That’s right. He lied. He tried to protect you from his psycho ex-wife. And then, when he thought he was rid of her, he decided to just let the whole thing go rather than worry you. Is that so terrible?”
“God. You sound just like him.”
“Well, I’m only saying, look at it from his point of view.”
Hayley rubbed her red eyes. “There’s more to it than that. He loved that woman. He gave her everything. He believed that she would always be the only one for him. I think, deep down, maybe he still believes it.”
“EEEuuu. You think he wants to get back with her? Please. He couldn’t be that self-destructive.”
“It’s…complicated. Remember I told you the guy had one of those hell-on-earth childhoods?”
“And we didn’t?”
“His was worse.”
“Than ours? Not possible.”
“But true. And to answer your question, no. I don’t think he wants to get back with her.”
“Well, good. You kind of had me scared there for a minute. I mean, no way you should think that. It’s so painfully clear that the guy’s crazy in love with you.”
Hayley felt the tears rising all over again. “Oh, don’t I wish.” She grabbed another tissue and blotted her eyes.
Her sister said, “You’ve got to go back to him, work this out. Time goes by, you know? You stay here, he stays there. You’re only going to drift farther and farther apart….”
“I know. You’re right. I know…”
Yet somehow, another week went by and Hayley did nothing to reach out to her husband. By then, they’d been apart for a month.
She was mindful of Kelly’s warnings. And she did long to go to him.
But stronger than her yearning was her fear of what she might find when she got there.
Even a workaholic can’t work late every night.
For the first time since Hayley left him, Marcus got home at six. He changed into jeans and a sweater and he heated up the meal his housekeeper had left for him.
He ate. He was just putting the plate in the dishwasher when the doorbell chimed.
His heart turned over. Hayley.
But no. She had a key. No need to ring the bell…
His pulse settled back into its regular dull rhythm.
The bell chimed again when he reached the front of the house. He knew by then who it would be.
He realized it was time. He was ready at last. He pulled the door open.
On the other side, Adriana looked at him meltingly. Behind her, beyond the porch, snow swirled in the icy dark.
“Oh, Marcus. At last.” She wore a leather trench coat and impossibly high heels and her hair sparkled, dusted with snow. She looked like something out of some old Hollywood movie. Something…unreal.
He looked into those wide, whiskey-colored eyes and felt absolutely nothing. He might as well have been looking at a picture of a model in some fashion magazine. Objectively, he saw how stunning she was, a portrait of feminine perfection.
But what did she have to do with him? Not a thing. It seemed so strange to him, that he’d once been married to her.
The truth came clear to him, in that instant.
Adriana Carlson had never had any power over him that he hadn’t given her, hadn’t handed over, like an offering. Like a sacrifice.
He stepped back. She entered the foyer. He shut the door.
“Oh, at last, at last…” She reached for him.
He took a second step backward, free of her grasping touch.
“Oh!” The huge brown eyes filled with tragic tears. She pressed the back of her slim hand to her mouth. “Oh, what do I have to do? How can I show you I know I was wrong? We need to stop this. You know that we do. We need to heal this horrible breach between us, so we can be together again.”
“Adriana. Cut the crap, okay?”
She gasped. It was very dramatic. “What? I don’t know what you—”
“Yeah. You do. You know exactly what I mean. You’ve got some wild idea that I still have feelings for you. You’re wrong. I don’t. I love my wife.” I love my wife.
Had he really said those words?
Oh, yeah. He had.
And they were true.
Damn. What a hopeless, witless idiot he’d been.
Hayley. He loved Hayley. For months now, he’d loved her.
Since well
before she left him that first time, back in May.
How many times was he going to let her leave him? How many times did he have to lose her, before he finally got a clue and admitted that she was the one for him? That he loved her, would always love her.
That this thing with Adriana was truly over.
There was no room for that old, tortured love in his heart now. How could there be? His heart was filled.
With light. With hope. With goodness.
With Hayley.
Adriana gasped again. Strangely, that second time, her gasp almost sounded real. “You’re serious….” It came out in a stunned whisper.
He reached for the door again and pulled it open. “Please don’t bother me, or Hayley, anymore. There’s no point. She has my heart. I belong to her. Do you see that now?”
“I…” She put her hand to her mouth again, and then let it fall. And then, at last, she said it. She admitted it. “Yes. All right. I see.” She turned and stepped out into the snowy darkness.
He shut the door behind her.
There were bells ringing.
Hayley groaned and rolled over.
The bells rang some more.
She opened one eye. It was pitch-dark in her bedroom, except for the glow of the digital clock, which said it was five minutes of midnight.
Five minutes of midnight.
And some fool was ringing her doorbell.
The fool rang it again. Any second now, Jenny would start crying.
Hayley turned on the light, threw back the covers, shoved her feet into her waiting slippers, grabbed her old robe from the end of the bed and raced to the front door. She couldn’t wait to yank it wide and give the idiot on the other side a large piece of her mind.
Hayley glared through the peephole before turning the lock. What she saw made her throat clutch and her knees tremble.
Marcus.
Chapter Fifteen
Hayley’s hand shook as she turned the dead bolt. She flung the door wide.
He was wearing old jeans, a tan sweater and a heavy leather jacket. He looked…amazing.
Bravo Christmas Reunion Page 14
