by Julie Cross
Jean scrambled to her feet and headed toward the nearest exit. “I’m not feeling well.”
I sighed with relief the second she was out the door. Now I really wouldn’t be able to make eye contact with her ever again. Not without turning the color of a tomato.
“Did you tell her to do that?” Nora asked Thomas.
“Not that. No,” he confirmed. “I told her to entertain the kid, make him feel more at home here.”
My stomach sank and flipped all at the same time. And then I felt the wine bubbling up inside me, working its way toward my throat.
I barely made it to the kitchen sink before regurgitating the dark purple liquid. “Impurities, right?” I gasped as my head hung over the drain. “In the water … the water used to make wine.”
Nora raced over, standing behind me, and placed a hand on the back of my neck like my mother did when I was sick as a child. She pressed a button above my head, turning the stream of water on, allowing me to rinse my mouth.
“Impurities for sure but also alcohol,” Thomas said. “It’s toxin that was banned decades ago for its negative effects on health and unpredictable behavorial side effects, not to mention its addictive nature.”
Thomas and Nora helped me walk to my bed after deciding my balance was less than a hundred percent. Nora placed a cool rag on my forehead and then left to check on Jean. Thomas stayed in my room, sitting in a chair next to the bed.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize Jean was experimenting tonight. I’ve seen how you admire her,” he said quietly, so as not to disturb my upset stomach and pounding head. “I just thought it might help cheer you up a little, spending time alone with Jean. She agreed without question.”
I couldn’t be upset with Thomas for trying to help me, but finding out he had instigated this whole evening made everything seem like just another mission or experiment. Nothing personal. It wasn’t like Jean would have said no to Thomas. Everyone respected him. Everyone knew he’d never ask for something that he didn’t think was important.
His intentions might have been out of kindness to me, but Jean’s were out of kindness and admiration for Thomas, not for me. Only the wine made her look at me differently and enjoy the time alone together.
“I wasn’t completely honest with you, Blake,” he said. “When I told you that Grayson had been injured.”
“He’s not injured?” I tried to sit up and decided it wasn’t worth the effort.
“He spent a lot of time in and around the year 1991 for the Tempus Gene Project and then eventually for his own personal time. The same freedom you’ve just been given to explore the past.” Thomas repositioned his chair so he was facing me and looked me right in the eyes. “He fell in love with a man in 1986. An agent working for the Central Intelligence Agency.”
Shock must have filled my expression though I tried my best to conceal it. “He could come back? Anytime? He chooses to live there?”
“I haven’t relayed this information accurately to Dr. Ludwig or anyone else. Grayson was my mentor. He helped me through my early missions and I had hoped if I allowed him some time, he’d realize his weakness and overcome it. A physical injury would keep his record clean,” Thomas said. “But a mistake, a judgment error, would mean his ability could be taken from him.”
“Taken?” I asked, finally able to sit up and lean against the headboard. “How do they take it?”
“I don’t know all the details,” Thomas said. “But trust me, there are ways. I don’t want you to fall into the same trap, feeling too much emotion for your family. That kind of behavior can really make this job difficult. I thought maybe having fun with Jean would help you overcome this. Perhaps I was wrong, and I’m truly sorry if her intentions hurt you at all.”
“It was just the wine,” I said. “I don’t know if it would have been a pleasant experience, spending time alone with her, if it weren’t for the … alcohol. Of course I look at her, think about her that way, but she’s the only female even remotely close to my age that I’ve seen since leaving home.”
“I understand,” Thomas said, standing up. “I won’t interfere in that way again. You have my word. And you also have my word that I’ll do everything in my power to keep my head clear and not abandon my position as your mentor for as long as you need me.”
“Did you mean it?” I asked him before he could leave the room. “When you said Dr. Ludwig wouldn’t be upset about two time travelers reproducing?”
He turned his back to me, flipping off the light before saying, “It’s a concept the government is currently exploring.”
“What about the Tempus Gene Project?”
“It’s certainly changing history, showing itself much earlier, but has yet to create the larger number of time travelers intended. President Healy wants to abandon the experiment in the next twelve months if it continues to be unproductive.” He shut the door halfway, leaving me in the dark. “Get some sleep. You’ll feel better tomorrow.”
And because Thomas told me to, I pushed my worries aside for now and fell right to sleep.
* * *
“Huh,” I said. “Are you sure this is the same Thomas that I knew?”
“Yes,” Blake said firmly. “And Grayson didn’t only stay in the past because of his partner. He also began to disagree with Thomas and Dr. Ludwig.”
“Sorry about the girl’s setting you up like that. Totally sucks,” I said to try and make the air in the small space slightly more comfortable for him.
“Yeah, totally,” Holly chimed in. She lifted her feet onto the long desk and leaned back in her chair. “I’ve been there, too. One time I was at this party and this guy I didn’t even know hit on me at the bar and then when I asked him to dance, he was really into it. Turns out he was just another agent trying to get information out of me about my best friend—”
“Wait,” Blake interrupted looking confused. “What—?”
“He’s dead,” she said, jumping back in. “Not the guy at the bar. My best friend. And the guy I danced with … apparently he’s hung out with various versions of me and doesn’t feel like it’s important to give me any details about those encounters.”
I stayed leaning against the wall, staring at Holly while attempting to look like I wasn’t completely in love with her. “That’s a great story, Hol, but—”
“So this guy was a time traveler?” Blake asked. “Who did he work for? Tempest?”
“Supposedly Tempest,” Holly said. “Good guys, bad guys, I’m not sure and it really doesn’t matter. Just another asshole trying to hook up with me for a mission.”
“He was trying to hook up with you?” I rolled my eyes and let out an angry breath. “If I remember right, you were the one that asked to come home with me. And I said no!”
Blake’s eyes bounced nervously between the two of us. “Um, okay, I’m lost.”
Holly dropped her feet to the floor with a loud thud and leaned forward in her chair, angling it away from me and facing Blake. “Let’s try this a different way. Let’s say another time traveler, one you don’t know very well, maybe not at all, seems to know a hell of a lot about you. And then you find out he or she has been jumping into the past and hanging out with you or doing God knows what with you. Then he or she erases everything and won’t tell you a fucking thing about what happened, would that piss you off?”
“You know what, Agent Flynn?” I snapped. “I never took you as the passive-aggressive type.”
She spun her chair around to face me. “Oh, I think I’m being very direct.”
Panic crept up inside me, mixing with anger. Why couldn’t she see that I was trying to make things better for her? “What? Am I supposed to relay every single second to you? Seriously? I already told you everything days ago, or don’t you remember?”
She stood up and walked closer to me, arms folded across her chest. “I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately and too many things don’t add up. If you only knew me through Adam, why did seeing me with Brian at the b
ookstore piss you off so much? Don’t deny it either, I could tell you were furious. And why did you almost kiss me during that fifty-thousand-dollar dance?”
I held my breath, feeling my heart thud too loud. I swallowed back the words I wanted to say and kept my mouth shut. She was too perceptive to miss the waver that would inevitably be present in my voice.
“You were about to kiss me, I know you were. It was like you forgot that you weren’t with a version of me who wouldn’t think that was weird. Like another version of me would expect to be kissed by you.”
My eyes were locked on hers, nowhere to run. All I could do was say, “Just let it go, Hol, please. It doesn’t matter.”
With that lame reply, I turned around and left the room. I couldn’t keep looking at her and not give everything away. What would she do if I told her?
Don’t. You’ve made the right choice.
CHAPTER SIX
DAY 11. LATE MORNING
I found Courtney and Emily in one of the cabins. They both sat on the bottom bunk of one of three sets of bunk beds, sifting through a giant pile of clothes.
“What’s wrong?” Courtney said as soon as she looked up at me.
Twin perception. It got me every time.
“Nothing,” I muttered.
Courtney looked at Emily and shook her head. “Jackson is a big fat liar. And a hamster murderer, too, apparently.”
Emily giggled and tossed items from the top of the pile to the floor by my shoes.
I laughed, too. “Okay, seriously, you need to forgive me for that. We were eight.”
“Fine,” she said. “Help us find pants for Mason. Something close to a thirty-inch waist and thirty-two-inch length.”
My guard flew up instantly as I stared Courtney down. “Let Mason find his own damn pants.”
“That’s nice, Jackson,” she said, rolling her eyes at me. “Who do you think dug through an entire supply closet to find jeans in your size?”
“I was incapacitated,” I said. “Last I checked, Mason was in perfect health.”
“Don’t be such a jerk,” Courtney snapped.
I reached into the clothes pile, throwing a few T-shirts to the ground before retrieving some dark blue jeans that looked close to Mason’s size. “There. Happy now?”
She snatched the pants from me. “Thanks.”
Emily and I watched as she stomped out of the cabin, probably to go find Mason. “That’s the second girl I’ve ticked off today.”
Emily sat up straighter, her tiny body barely covering any space on the bed. I took Courtney’s spot on the bottom bunk and leaned against the post and closed my eyes.
“What happened before this?” Emily asked.
“Holly’s a little upset with me.”
“I’m sorry. I know how you feel about her.”
My eyes flew open again, zooming in on this little kid who might be the one person who could ruin my plan with the Holly issue. “You do know how I feel about her, don’t you?”
Emily nodded.
“My journal, right?” That damn journal and damn fingerprint clone. Right after I began Tempest training, Dr. Melvin had given me a lockbox that required my fingerprints for access, and of course Emily being my clone and all meant she was a match. Reading my journal, reading all the things I’d wanted to use time travel to fix, had been the reason we’d ended up here in 3200. She also read a copy of the original 009 Holly’s diary that someone had left in Stewart’s hands before our jump to the future. I hadn’t been able to bring myself to read much of it, but I’m sure Emily absorbed every page. And probably in seconds with her brainpower.
My annoyance must have been clearly written on my face because before I could cover it, she was crying and trying to hide the tears from me.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have read it,” Emily said.
My entire gut twisted with guilt. Make that three girls I’d upset in one day. That had to be a personal record for me. I shoved the clothes to the floor and scooted next to Emily, putting an arm around her shoulder. “Hey, it’s not your fault. They would have found a way to trick me. And honestly, everybody I love the most is here and maybe that’s okay.”
She sniffled a bit more, nodding and wiping her nose at the same time. “But Adam … he’s not here. I almost got him, too, I just didn’t have time.”
I wrapped my head around the idea of Adam’s being here, alive. Then I really would be okay. “Emily, do you think … I mean hypothetically … if we ever did get out of here and we could go back to the present, a complete jump back, could we land on a date before Adam died and keep it from happening?”
“You’ve done complete jumps before,” she said, then looked up at me with a sheepish grin. “I read about those in your journal when you saw your two-year-old self and Eileen Covington.”
“Right, yeah, that was a complete jump.”
“Well, did you think about what mark you were going to hit on your way back?” she asked.
I shook my head. “Not really. Just like the half-jumps, I have to go back to home base, back to the exact moment I left.”
“I think you could go somewhere besides home base in a complete jump,” she explained, as if thirty years older than me. “The problem is, you’re going to have to deal with a duplicate version of yourself. It’s not like when you switch timelines from World A to World B. The other Jackson doesn’t vanish.”
“What if someone killed him,” I muttered under my breath, but she heard me.
“I heard Grayson talking about that.” Emily shook her head. “It’s confusing, I know, but everyone would have another version of themselves in 2009 if you go back and it’s not the moment you left. But aligning with the moment you left won’t be difficult. Your body is naturally going to seek out the former home base where there aren’t two Jacksons. Anything other than that would be very difficult.”
Grief swept over me. It was a hopeless situation. “It doesn’t matter anyway. We’re all stuck here with no prospect of escape anytime soon.” I glanced down at her weary face. “It’s not your fault, Emily. They would have come up with dozens of ways to get us here, or at least me. Imagine how crazy I’d be if I were stuck here alone.”
She nodded and wiped away a few more tears. “You don’t want me to tell anyone about you and Holly, right?”
“I’m not trying to lie to her intentionally, I promise. It’s just … she should have a choice about who she loves. A choice that isn’t influenced by what happened in the past. Or in another timeline. She deserves it. I’ve put her through hell and I won’t do that again.”
“If she asks me anything, I won’t tell her, I swear,” Emily said.
I glanced down at her and smiled. “Are you sure you’re only eight? Maybe clones age slower? You must be at least twenty-seven.”
Emily giggled and jumped off the bed, pulling a pair of red high heels from the clothes pile now on the cabin floor. “You’re right. I’m twenty-seven. That means I can wear these, right?”
“Go for it, kid.” I stood up and watched as she kicked off the little tennis shoes she had on and slid her feet into the pointy red heels. They were the most impractical shoes for Eyewall people to store in a supply closet for the prisoners of Misfit Island. I had to assume that either Sasha or Lonnie showed up here wearing those the day they got trapped.
Emily scooted at a snail’s pace across the slippery, dust-covered floors. “Look! I’m five point three eight centimeters taller!”
“Really? I would have guessed at least five point three nine.”
“Nope.” She laughed again and headed for the cabin door. “I have to show Holly.”
Her hand froze on the door and she turned slowly to face me. “It’s too bad she doesn’t know what you did for her. I think she’s really scared but in a different way than the others. There’s nothing worse than thinking that no one cares about you.”
I walked closer and squatted in front of her. “I care about you, you know that, right? From the f
irst time I met you, I knew we’d need each other someday. I knew you were important to me. And it is possible for good things to come from bad ideas.” Not that Emily herself was a bad idea, but cloning time travelers and forcing children were.
“Do you really believe that?” she asked.
“I do. I really do.”
She gave me a sad smile and then turned to leave again. “I won’t tell her anything, I promise.”
When I went back outside, the first thing I noticed was Courtney standing in front of the cabin next door. Her arm was wrapped around the tall wooden post in front, and Mason stood across from her, a little too close, and leaning closer every second. I stormed up behind him and grabbed the hood of his sweatshirt, tugging it hard and pulling him farther from my sister.
“Excuse us,” I said to Courtney. “Mason and I have some Tempest business to discuss.”
“Okay…?” she said.
I gave Mason a shove in the direction of the lake. “Walk with me.”
“Uh, doesn’t look like I have a choice,” he said, attempting sarcasm, but I could hear the tiniest indication of fear in his voice, which made my blood literally boil.
Guilt. His intentions must not be very innocent.
The lake looked more green than blue now, and I waited until we had nearly reached it before stopping and yanking Mason to a halt by grabbing his hood again.
“What do you think you’re doing?” I demanded.
He shrugged, looking anywhere but at me. “Nothing.”
I snorted a laugh. “Yeah right. Don’t think I don’t know what’s going on in your head. Just put a stop to it now. Whatever you did to send her digging through clothes and memorizing your waist measurements needs to end.”
“I didn’t do anything,” he said, his voice going up an octave. “It’s not my fault we have things in common.”
“Like what? What do you possibly have in common with my sister?”
Mason folded his arms across his chest, staring hard at me.
Oh right, the being-dead thing. I swallowed and took a step back from Mason. “If you touch her, I’ll seriously kick your ass, and if that doesn’t scare you enough, I’m sure Agent Meyer Senior will.”
