Mom: I will make your life a living hell if you don’t get me what I want. I deserve it. I put up with you for seventeen years too long…and I think we can agree that you never made it easy. You never once thought about me. Maybe you could try and show me love. Ask for the Boulders, Donovan. I’m tired of waiting. If you love me, you’d ask.
Liam puts his chin on my shoulder, since he’s been reading over my shoulder. “I hate her for you, Van. What a bitch.”
I smile up, feeling the stinging of embarrassment in my eyes, and wave a hand in the air. “I don’t even know who that is…must be a wrong number.”
Liam twists his face and kisses my cheek, hard, pressing it in, before rising to his full height, accepting my humor by not pushing.
“Cherry.”
I don’t look up at Grey. If I do, I might crack. He’s my truth serum, always has been, but I don’t want him to see the hurt because he’ll want to dive in until he reaches the bottom. No explorations today.
Grey’s finger comes under my chin and forces my eyes to his. What scares me most about this moment isn’t that I’m going to tell him what he wants to hear. It’s that I want to. That I need to. I want to seek out a safe space in him. I want to let him in, but if I do, I’m afraid he may root himself inside and never leave.
“What do you want me to say? My mother is a bitch, but I’ve given her more reasons to hate me than she even realizes. The irony is it’s my inability to cater to her whims that she dislikes me for the most. It’s like life’s cruel joke—she despises me for something I can’t control or fix.”
“It’s her loss.”
I wipe a hand quickly under my eye, removing any evidence that I care, as I stay locked on him. “Is it? You don’t really know, now do you?”
He doesn’t because I won’t tell him all the reasons she has not to love me.
“I know enough. Only a monster abandons their young.”
I wish I could kiss him. It’s a single thought, the impulse that takes over my mind. He stares at me, and everything disappears. It’s just me and Grey, like when we were little, understanding each other in the way only we can.
“Thank you,” I mouth, and he gives me a nod.
“Grey’s full of shit. The real monsters are inside there,” Liam growls into my ear, pointing at the haunted house.
On cue, screams come from inside the building, and I jump. Liam laughs at me, but I wrap my arms around him, giving him a quick hug, letting go as we shuffle closer to the front.
We move forward slowly to the entrance, as Liam acts like a clown, but it lightens the mood and has me rolling my eyes at him. We stop at an attendant dressed like a vampire who’s taking payment. He bares his long fangs, and my eyes fix on him, fully creeped out as I grab for Liam’s hand.
“Don’t you dare leave me,” I whisper, as he laughs at me again.
Grey hands the guy cash, then reaches out quick as lightning and nabs my side, making me jump ten feet in the air.
“No! Dammit. No! I hate you.”
The guys howl with laughter as I smack their arms, taking a step forward in front of them, but a hand creeps up the back of my jacket and dips two fingers inside the band of my skirt, slowly pulling me back. Grey’s warm breath moves the side of my hair as he speaks.
“Cherry, let me go first. Wrap your arms around me and don’t let go. You dealt with enough creeps today. I got you from here.”
He always knows just what to say. A smile pulls at my lips, grateful for the human shield in more ways than one. Grey slides around to the front, Liam staying behind, as the attendant stationed at the entrance waves us in. I do as I’m told and wrap my arms around Grey’s hard stomach, already grimacing and squeezing my eyes shut as I grip his shirt for dear life.
Ghostly wails and the sound of chains rattling surround us as the darkness takes over. A burst of air makes me yelp and hold on tighter to Grey as we walk in step past whatever is happening. I refuse to open my eyes. My pulse is already skyrocketing through the roof, and the last thing I need to see are the nightmares I’m envisioning. Grey taps my hand, probably needing me to loosen my vice grip, but I wholeheartedly refuse, just shaking my head against his back. Grey’s stomach vibrates with laughter as I scream again, feeling something touch my shoulder.
“It’s just me, Van.”
I giggle but reach back for Liam when I feel a sort of cold air behind me.
“Donovan, we’re fine. There are four rooms. Open your eyes.”
I blink them open, loosening my grip on Grey, and look over my shoulder at Liam, who’s shaking his head with a huge smile due to my overreaction. Screams from the next room echo, and I pull back, forcing Grey to drag us through the shredded fabric that’s separating the rooms.
“It’s fine, just fake decapitated bodies,” Liam says behind me.
It’s disgusting. A bloody menagerie of headless mannequins is littered around the room, posed in various ways to look like dead bodies. I let out a breath, keeping my eyes peeled, when a chainsaw rips, rattling through the room. My arms drop from Grey’s body as I begin pushing his laughing frame forward, screaming.
“Hell no! Oh my God. Go!”
Grey tries to grab me, but I break away, scared to death, but laughing as I run past the group of friends we came with and into the last room far away from the psycho with the saw, only to realize that I’m alone without either of my bodyguards. Shit. I hate this. I hate them for bringing me and forcing their stupid fun on me.
My whole body has the heebie-jeebies, but I spin around looking for the scare, holding my arms out, and wait for the guys to catch up as I let out another nervous laugh. “Okay, scary people, I know someone is waiting to get me. But I’m not your girl. Just stay in your hidden place, and we’ll call it even.” Am I negotiating with carnies?
A shadow, as in a walking one, dressed in all black jumps out away from the wall where it was camouflaged, and I scream bloody murder. My hands dart to cover my face, and I stumble back, only to land against a random soft, warm body. Oh my God.
“Grey!”
It’s the only thing I think to scream. And I do scream it, loud enough for the whole building to hear. His broad shoulders barrel through the doorway, eyes locked on me. My arms are already outstretched as he scoops me up without stopping. I circle my arms around his neck as my legs wrap around his waist. I don’t even chance a single look up after hiding my face in his smooth neck because I’d much rather stay like a baby koala and let him carry me through the darkness.
“Scaredy cat,” he hums into the curve between my shoulder and neck. “Is this becoming our thing? Me carrying you around?”
“Shut up. Sometimes you need it, sometimes I do. Now we’re even.”
Tightening my hold, I focus on the smell of him. It’s different than when I first came back. The day he kissed my cheek when we were introduced, he smelled faintly of cigarettes. I didn’t mind it. It was like the perfect reminder of what kind of guy I was dealing with, but now, he smells like expensive soap or aftershave. It’s woodsy and rich. I want to bathe in it. In fact, he hasn’t smelled like cigarettes since that night.
He’s holding me up with an arm under my ass, keeping my school skirt in place, and I’ve never been so grateful, because I may be afraid, but I’m not down to show off my backside to the theater of creeps. His other hand is wrapped around my rib cage as he takes long strides.
“Are you going to make Grey carry you the whole way, you big baby?”
Liam’s voice is teasing, but I don’t miss the hint of jealousy.
“She’s fine,” Grey answers, and I smile against his neck.
“If your arms get sore, I’m happy to pick up where you left off.”
My eyes meet Liam’s grin over Grey’s shoulder, but I duck back down just as quickly as I looked up. Those were more words that mean something else.
We make it through the house of scares, and I swear I couldn’t be more wrapped around him. Grey pats my ass, causing my head to
pop up and meet his serious face.
“Did you just pat my ass?”
“Time to stand on your own two feet.”
“Are your arms already tired?” I ask, as he lowers me to the ground, unapologetic for the ass pat. I look around at the lobby of the movie theater; it’s filled with people and random masked characters that are meant to scare you and keep everyone in the mood.
Jesus. If I don’t have a heart attack today, it’ll be a miracle.
Grey pulls my face back to his, holding my chin between his fingers. “Were you asking me to share?”
My eyes dart to Liam, who’s laughing with some other friends, then back to Grey.
“Answer my question, Donovan.”
But I don’t. I can’t. This is exactly what I wanted to avoid.
“Fine, then I’ll give you my answer—I won’t.”
Grey’s eyes don’t meet mine as he says the words, but it doesn’t matter because mine have dropped to the cheap carpeting under my feet. Giggling from one of the other girls is accompanied by a push from behind. My eyes pop open as Liam urges me toward the concession stands. His stomach rumbles as he begins to name off all the things he wants, shelving the moment that just happened. “Popcorn, candy, hot dog, nachos—”
“And Icees,” Grey throws out, cutting Liam off. My head twists in his direction as he adds, “They even have my favorite flavor—cherry.”
Grey
I COULD BE BLIND AND still find her. But today it isn’t difficult because she’s lounged under her favorite tree watching us practice. She’s been here almost every day since we made her come the first time. Now we’re knee-deep into fall, and Halloween is right around the corner.
It’s like whatever energy she’s got rumbling around inside of her affixes to my bones and holds me in place. I can’t remember the last time a girl captured my attention this way. Yes, I can—when I was twelve.
Since our sleepover at the lake, where nothing and everything happened all at once, it’s been friendship slash flirtation as usual. That seems to be the version of “just us” she favors. But my preferences have shifted. It feels like I’ve been hit by a freight train. Because since that weekend, and every other after that, her words from the first day of school have dominated my thoughts. “A girl like me is bad for a boy like you.”
I call bullshit. There’s no possible way that she’s bad for me, but what’s got me thinking is why she thinks that. And I’m no closer to an answer since she’s like a damn vault. She’s dodgier than a damn politician, only giving information when the mood strikes, and the last time was in line at the haunted house. Her mom treated her like shit, and Donovan’s default was to blame herself. Whatever Donovan’s done, however much has happened to her when I wasn’t on watch, shows up as regret behind her eyes. If she’d let me, I’d make everyone pay for putting it there.
Liam lets out a long exhale, and I know he’s staring at her too. He’s gone over her. He’s admitted as much, but it’s grown since the lake. We haven’t spoken a word about that night to each other, but I see the way he looks at her, the attraction displayed in the way his body finds hers. And the way his hands always find a way to touch her. I get it, and I hate it, too. But the difference between Liam and me is something that works in my favor. Liam respects her wishes to be friends. He doesn’t push; he patiently wishes for more.
I’m too much of a prick for that.
“Mmhmm.” I hum my answer to his thought before he says it.
“Are you as irritated as I am that we can’t tell which one of us she’s staring at?”
Like I said, mmhmm. But I don’t answer aloud again and turn my attention back to the coach, trying to listen to him complain about our drive. It’s all hot air. Something he thinks is motivational, but our success is already motivation enough. Out of the side of my eye, I see Liam lean back, and I know he’s doing something to get her attention—he can’t help himself. It makes me want to take his head off.
“Remember when we used to make her row with us?”
My shoulders shake, relaxing as I remember how scared she always was, until Liam called her a chicken, and then she pretended to be indifferent while basically pissing her pants.
I turn and stare at her again, remembering her face back then, her giggles, the way she would blow out little screams as we rowed, and before I register what I’m doing, I’m walking in her direction. “McCallister,” the coach calls out, but I keep going, undeterred, until I reach where she’s sitting.
She smiles, looking around me at what I assume is the team staring at us.
“I think you’re wanted.”
“Probably,” I answer down to her. “But you know what I was thinking? Remember when Liam and I used to take you out—”
She snaps up a finger, halting the rest of my sentence.
“Umm. No. I don’t remember being terrified of that little boat and you two rowing like maniacs. That memory isn’t stored in my brain like trauma. Nope. Not at all.”
I hear my name called out again behind me, but I’m busy.
“Come on,” I direct, tilting my head. “We need a coxswain, you know, someone little to sit at the very front.”
Her finger points in Ethan’s direction. “He looks fine.”
“E!” I yell over my shoulder, not taking my eyes off of her.
I hear a faint “Ow” followed by Liam laughing as her head starts to shake furiously.
“Absolutely not.”
Her body is rigid as she sits up, stalk straight. The expression on her face is a big “hell no.” But I wasn’t asking. I squat down, noticing how her eyes dart to my thighs, then back to my face.
“You’ll come willingly, or I’ll make you. Pick it, Cherry.”
“Make me? I dare you. I fight back, Grey. I may even bite.”
“Promise?”
I place a hand on the ground and lunge forward with a deep growl, wrapping my arm around her waist and hoisting her roughly over my shoulder before I dead-lift her back to standing.
“Grey! Oh my God! What the fuck are you doing?”
Her screams have me laughing as I turn around and slow-jog back down to the guys. She’s too afraid of her ass showing to fight me off and keeps one hand on the back of her skirt, the other gripping the waistband of my bike shorts, which makes what I’m doing much more manageable than I anticipated. The moment my feet slow, she starts up again, yelling profanities and threats, but her complaints are drowned out by the claps and hollers from the boys.
“Fellas, we got a newbie. Time to break her in. She needs a long, hard ride…real bad.”
“I’ll kill you,” she yells, slapping at my back and laughing.
Liam claps his hands together. “Hell yes.” The coach throws up his arms, like he’s pissed, but he won’t push back. Not to me. I’m the number one rower in the country. Maybe the world. He’ll let me have my fun.
She starts to wiggle again as the guys prep the boat.
“Liam! If you don’t stop this, you’re dead to me!”
He shakes his head at me and walks around, leaning down toward her face. He might be enjoying this more than I am.
“Still chicken, huh? Trust us—there’s no more fun place to be than with both of us. Remember? You’ll love it. We’ll break you in slow and easy. Then drive it home, nice and hard.”
“Dead. To. Me.”
I give a little pop of my shoulder to readjust her, making her squeal, before I carry her down toward where the guys are waving to let us know they’re all set.
“Grey. I swear to God.”
“Be good,” I warn as I carry her the last few steps and bend to set her on her feet.
Donovan narrows her eyes at me, then looks at the water, her brows drawing together. My fingertips sweep across her bangs, giving me more of her eyes.
“It’s nice and smooth over here. You don’t have to be afraid. I got you, Cherry. It’ll be almost as fun as the car.”
“Or the Ducati.” Liam winks,
extending an arm out from where he’s sitting as she steps into his grip. He steadies Donovan by the waist as her hands find his shoulders. Her head is still twisted, staring at me, unsure and nervous as she places one foot inside the boat.
“Come on, Van. You can trust us.”
She shifts her attention to Liam’s voice as she chews the inside of her cheek. I take the opportunity to lean down and let my lips come close to her ear. “Don’t worry, Cherry, we’ve had way more practice since we were twelve. Don’t I always make it worth your while.”
An exasperated smile blossoms on her face, as she glances back at me over her shoulder, and takes the other step down.
Her smile is set firmly in place as she lets Liam guide her into her seat. He places her at the bow of the boat, where there’s a little seat that faces us. He laughs when she bites her lip as he leans back away from her, leaving her alone.
I lower myself in, facing her, Liam directly behind me, and give her a wink.
“Ready?”
“No.”
We push off away from the dock, and she squeals, sealing her eyes shut with her hands, only to immediately dig her fingernails into the edges of the boat when it dips.
“Oh my God, Grey.”
Her raspy laugh cracks the air, and I’m lost. She’s breathless, eyes shining, hair blowing in the wind gorgeous. She’s fucking Aphrodite.
“Fuck,” Liam whispers from behind. Agreed.
I yell out a command, and she jumps out of her skin, beaming again, eyes focused on me. Now I have your attention. Everyone stills, readying their oars. And before she can anticipate it, we’re off. The first few pulls make her rock hard against the drag of the boat, but as we pick up speed by the second, the rocking becomes fluid.
“Holy shit.” She giggles again, letting her head fall back against the wind.
Our bodies move in motion, back, forward, back, forward, as we dig harder, grind more to set the pace. My shoulders swell and contract with each row. All my focus is honed in on her. Fuck, I can’t look away.
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