“No.” She shook her head. “He loved my mother. He wouldn’t force himself on her.”
“He didn’t have to.” William huffed as though Elsie was trying his patience with her stupidity. She glared at him.
Did he think he could show up uninvited, unannounced, unwanted, drop this steaming pile of shit on her then whisk her off to live happily ever after in a secluded community of their own? Oh, and murder Brutus while they were at it? No big deal.
“I need to talk to my father.”
William folded his arms. “Why? So he can force you to love him too?”
“No one can force me to love them,” Elsie gritted out, hoping he’d take the point.
“Maybe not, but he can wipe your memory of this knowledge. You need to stay away from Lazarus. Claim Brutus, let me kill him, and then we’ll get out of these godforsaken woods.” William loosened his arms and started toward Elsie.
“Stay away from me,” she cried, jumping back.
William’s eyebrows slanted. “I’m not the enemy.”
“I’ve found a mate in Wolf Hollow, William. Brutus can’t have me, and neither can you. If you continue pursuing me, how are you any better than my father?”
William scowled. “This is different. I’m protecting you.”
“I don’t need your protection. I can protect myself, and so can my mate. After tomorrow, I will be a claimed woman. End of story. Go back to Balmar Heights, William. Or leave if you truly hate it there. But don’t come back to the hollow, and don’t come looking for me again.”
Elsie took off running, tears streaming down her cheeks the moment her back was turned to William. She sprinted for the glade even though the communal area was the last place she felt like going. If William had the bad idea to chase after her, he’d find himself surrounded by a group of angry wolf shifters.
Sprinting over tree roots and rocks, Elsie didn’t slow down until she had nearly reached the glade. She stopped and looked over her shoulder, getting her breathing under control so she could listen for movement in the trees. There were no signs or sounds indicating that William had come after her.
Sinking to the forest floor, Elsie squatted and cupped her face in her hands. William’s words blackened her mind like smoke.
“Raped repeatedly.”
Bile rose up her throat. She vomited into the dirt. Tears joined her dinner, flowing down her cheeks.
William was only trying to manipulate her, she tried to reason. That thought was interrupted by a cruel inner voice reprimanding her for being so blind and naïve. What kind of wolf shifter would willingly leave her pack to live inside a villa on the mountain with a wizard?
Why hadn’t he enchanted another she-wolf after her mother died? Perhaps because he’d had a doting daughter to keep him company. An innocent witch wolf who’d believed he could do no wrong.
Elsie pitched forward, catching her weight with her wrists before she could fall into her own sick. She heaved again.
Love had not brought her into this world. It had been sorcery. Deception. Rape.
More tears came flooding out.
There was a darkness inside her, and now she knew where it had come from. Recalling the spell she’d cast on Hudson to bring him to the ground earlier, a strangled sob burst from her lips. She was awful. Terrible. And she had everyone fooled. They thought she was kind. If only they realized. Elsie was more dangerous than Wolfrik could ever be. If the pack knew even a fraction of what she could do with her powers, they’d send her away.
Zackary thought he didn’t deserve her, but she was the one who didn’t deserve him. She’d pursued him relentlessly, practically given him no other option but to yield to her.
Her father would be proud, she thought bitterly.
Worst of all, there was no altering the course she’d set out on. She would still keep her secret and claim Zackary. But she swore to the moon and the stars above that she would spend the rest of her days loving her mate with her whole heart. His happiness was hers. She just needed to keep this one secret. Well, two secrets. She didn’t want Zackary to know how she’d been conceived. And she never wanted Tabor to find out about his mother. Why cause him needless pain and rage?
The next time she was alone with her father, she’d ask him why he’d done it. She’d give him a chance to explain himself before she shut him out. If he didn’t have an acceptable defense, she didn’t know that she could ever look into his face again.
Curled up in the fetal position in a patch of moss, Elsie didn’t sleep much that night. Instead, she replayed past conversations with her father and how he’d responded when she asked about her mother. There had been nothing malevolent in his tone or gaze, only sadness for the forever mate he’d loved and lost. How could he do something so vile to a female he obviously cared for? She couldn’t picture it. She didn’t want to. Not ever.
Her mind switched to more recent conversations—encounters with Brutus when she’d run across him in the forest.
“What kind of brute would want to take a female who hated him?” she’d demanded.
“You should ask your father that question,” Brutus had returned gruffly.
She had always blown off his responses, only half-listened before moving on to her next attack.
“What kind of animals would steal young children and use them as bargaining chips?”
Brutus had growled in outrage, loathing seeping into his eyes.
“The kind who had no other way to protect themselves against your father’s dark sorcery. He’d already taken our home, our place of gathering. Your father snuck up the mountain after our clan had changed skin to hunt. My father was the first one back. He tried to defend our territory, but Lazarus struck him down with a bolt of lightning he conjured from the sky. Your father took our home. It’s a good thing our females weren’t around or he might have taken them too.”
Elsie hugged her knees to her chest. Anger built inside her body, splintering in her chest. Seething thoughts turned toward William for telling her this awful secret. It was easier to hate the messenger than the man who had done these horrid deeds.
Anguish and revulsion warred inside her, but she couldn’t hate her father. She owed him an opportunity to explain himself first.
But what could he possibly say to make it better?
Elsie had the feeling that, like death, there was no coming back from this revelation.
Blurry eyed, and so exhausted she could barely stand up straight, Elsie stumbled into the glade for breakfast the next morning. She sat on a stump and slouched, not sure she had enough energy to wait in line. She really didn’t want to draw attention to herself either.
“Elsie, what’s wrong?” Zackary asked in a low voice.
She looked up and met his eyes. His brown irises shone with concern. Before she could answer, Tabor stormed over with clenched fists.
“Leave my sister alone, Zack.” Tabor’s voice carried across the glade, causing heads to pop up and look over. Elsie winced, frustration sweeping through her belly that her brother had brought more attention to her.
“He was just asking if I was okay,” she said moodily.
Tabor frowned. “Why? Is something the matter?”
“No. I couldn’t sleep, and now I’m tired . . . and cranky. So leave me be.” Elsie stared pointedly at her brother.
Tabor’s frown deepened. He cleared his throat and turned his head to Zackary, narrowing his eyes. She could practically read his mind yelling at the other male to “Go away!”
With stiff movements, Zackary left her side, making his way to the line at the cauldron.
Elsie folded her arms and narrowed her gaze on her brother. “Why do you have to be such an ass to him?”
Mirroring her, Tabor folded his arms. “Because I’ve known that mongrel my entire life. Everyone knows he can’t be trusted. Maybe he thinks he can fool you since you’re new here and don’t know any better. The only reason he’s still around is because I allow it.” Tabor narrowed his eye
s. “I’ve seen how he looks at you. I’m not blind, Elsie.”
Tears formed in her eyes. She squeezed her arms tighter to hold herself together, and keep her heart from falling out of her chest.
Relaxing his stance, Tabor sighed. “I know it may feel flattering to have the attention of a packmate. This is all still new to you, and I’m sure you have a romantic notion of claiming after seeing me happily mated, followed by Jordan and Raider, then Kallie and Wolfrik. And I know you just want to fit in and be friends with everyone, including befriending that mongrel who doesn’t deserve your kindness.”
She wished he’d stop talking.
The resentment Tabor harbored for Zackary might never go away. They would have to leave the hollow. She would never see her family or friends again.
“I’m asking you to stay away from him, Elsie. That’s my only request.”
Her head snapped up. “Request or demand?”
Tabor rubbed his lips together, studying her face.
“Maybe I’m going about this all wrong,” he said slowly. Tabor pulled his arm free and opened his palm, face up, staring coolly at his fingertips. “Perhaps Zackary is the one I should be warning to stay away.”
Elsie understood what Tabor meant. Her brother wouldn’t be warning Zackary away from her so much as threatening him.
“I think you’ve made your wishes clear enough,” she said bitterly.
“I’m only looking out for you, Elsie. Our father would do the same.”
She scowled. Their father was the reason for her dark mood this morning. Tabor had managed to draw the clouds in thicker.
If Tabor knew what she’d learned, he wouldn’t speak to her so coldly. He should meet Brutus and William, maybe then he’d open up his damn eyes and see how well Zackary treated her. But, oh no, that didn’t matter, not when Tabor had a grudge he was unwilling to let go of. Stubborn fool. He was ruining everything. What did her happiness matter?
She kicked a clump of loose soil and pinched her lips together.
Tabor straightened his back. “If you’re tired, maybe you should sit out patrol. I’m sure Hudson would understand. I can speak to him.”
“No,” Elsie grit out. “I can handle patrol.”
“Want me to get you something to eat?”
“No.”
Tabor frowned and studied her face. Concerned he’d start speaking again, Elsie got off the stump and headed to the cauldron saying, “I can get it myself.”
After trading places with Chase in the clearing, Elsie apologized for her brother’s behavior at breakfast.
“He can be so thickheaded,” she complained. Tabor needed to stop treating her like a child and recognize her as his equal. He’d managed with Sasha. Why couldn’t he see his little sister as a grown woman?
She paced beside their tree with the heart carved into the trunk.
“He’s trying to look out for you.” Zackary shrugged, keeping his distance from her.
Elsie stopped her pacing and narrowed her eyes. “I can look out for myself. Always have. Always will.”
Zackary scrubbed his jaw, frowning the whole while. If Elsie weren’t so annoyed at her brother, she’d probably be blinking away more tears. Things had been going so well between her and Zackary. They were supposed to claim one another today, but she no longer felt in the mood, all thanks to William’s revelation. She got the feeling the boy wizard was out to sabotage her if she didn’t succumb to his wishes. He was despicable. Again, she seethed at her brother’s impaired perceptions. He said he wasn’t blind, but he was wrong; he saw nothing. Knew nothing. Her world was caving in and all he did was order her around, same as Brutus and William.
No. That wasn’t fair. How could her brother know? Zackary was right. In his own misconstrued way, Tabor was trying to protect her even if his actions meant her doom.
Zackary cleared his throat. His hand moved from his chin to the back of his neck.
“You said you didn’t sleep well.”
This time, the tears flowed freely. Zackary took three wide steps toward her before sweeping her into his arms and hugging her to his chest. He didn’t ask her what was wrong. He simply held her to him, running a gentle hand through her hair.
Elsie pressed her face against his bare chest, inhaling his woodsy scent. They stood like that a long time, saying nothing. Time stretched on. The sun edged its way across the sky higher. Elsie’s sniffles faded. Still, Zackary said nothing, providing comfort while respecting her privacy.
God, how she loved this shifter. He was there for her the way no one else had ever been. He knew what she needed without having to ask or be told. He was pleasure, comfort, and companionship all rolled into one big attractive man.
Inhaling him a final time before stepping out of his arms, Elsie looked over at their initials etched in the tree. She returned her attention to Zackary and blinked.
“I think my father may have done terrible things.” She looked down and pulled at the hem of her dress.
Leaving a stretch of silence, Zackary lowered his voice when he asked, “Why do you say that?”
“How did he end up mating two different she-wolves? Did your parents ever tell you what happened with Tabor’s mother?”
When Zackary didn’t answer, Elsie looked up and found him frowning. She could see the questions swirling behind his eyes. He rubbed his neck.
“Everyone said she’d been bewitched, but that’s only because she mated with a wizard, so they just sorta passed it off as that.”
“Why else would a wolf shifter mate with a wizard?” Elsie asked, hoping Zackary could come up with an answer to let Lazarus off the hook.
“I was still in my mother’s belly when it happened, so I’m just guessing here, but they must have been attracted to one another so they . . . you know?” Zackary attempted a smile. “Jager knows more, but I do remember hearing that Lucinda was crazy about your father.”
Elsie’s jaw locked. Crazy was the apt word. What had her father done to the poor she-wolf to make her lose her mind?
“What if he really did bewitch her?” Elsie found herself asking aloud.
Zackary furrowed his brows. “Why would he do that?”
“So he could breed with her,” Elsie jabbed her toe against the earth.
Zackary shook his head. “Lucinda loved your father. That much I know.”
“Maybe she didn’t have a choice.”
“You can’t force someone to love you . . . can you?”
“We’re not supposed to,” Elsie said defensively. The etched heart in the tree blurred along the sides of her vision. “But maybe my father did,” she whispered.
Zackary stood his ground rather than rush over to comfort her again. Perhaps his eyes had finally been opened to the danger she posed.
“What made you think of this now?” he asked.
She looked at the ground, searching for an explanation that didn’t involve William or Brutus. When no answer appeared in the soil, she looked into Zackary’s eyes as though he might help her.
“I was thinking about our claiming,” she began slowly. “And it got me to thinking about my mother. I never knew her so I only had my father’s stories to go on. He said he’d been a guest of my mother’s pack long ago after setting out on a quest to find shelter for his coven. My mother’s pack lived along a lake and welcomed my father and his travel companions with food, drink, and shelter. He wondered if the wolf pack was still there on the lake, so one day he set out to see for himself. Not only was the pack still there, but he was introduced to my mother and it was love at first sight.”
“That’s a nice story,” Zackary offered.
Elsie used to think it sounded so romantic—her father searching out the first wolf pack he’d ever known and finding his new forever mate in the process. Now she didn’t know if any of it was true. Perhaps he’d gone back and hidden in the woods, waiting for the first female to wander off alone before casting his spell. She’d seen him creep through the forest before—admired
his stillness and patience when they’d first traveled to Wolf Hollow to find Tabor. Without being a shifter, Lazarus still possessed the survival skills of a cunning predator. To think she’d been proud of his abilities. It churned her gut.
Elsie stared glassy eyed across the clearing, straight to the flowing river bordering the hollow.
“It’s just strange that none of my mother’s packmates ever tried to visit. I asked around and our elders all said the same thing. Abigail was the only wolf to ever come to Balmar Heights.”
Zackary squeezed his bottom lip between his fingers then let go. “When a shifter joins another pack, they become their family. I’m not surprised your mother’s old packmates didn’t seek her out, especially on a mountain full of wizards.”
Elsie shook her head. “That’s the other thing. He took that mountain from bear shifters—forced them from their home. If he’s capable of stealing a community for his coven, what else would he be willing to take? He lost his forever mate at a young age. They were never able to have children. Lazarus always said that kids were the best way to continue his legacy—to pass on his powers. He boasted about creating a superior species to thrive in this new world.” She doubled over, feeling sick again. “I think he forced himself on Tabor’s mother and on mine.”
There was no sugarcoating the truth. Her mother never had the chance to fight back. He’d treated her worse than a dog forced to submit to her master.
Sobs wracked Elsie’s body. She pitched forward, thinking she’d fall, but Zackary was there to catch her. When her legs gave out, he scooped her up and carried her across the clearing until reaching the riverbank where he set her gently down, taking a seat beside her. His fingers caressed the top of her hand in soothing strokes.
“Maybe it’s not what you think. Either way, I’m sorry to see you hurting.”
Elsie sniffed and laid her head against Zackary’s shoulder. “Thank you for being so sweet.”
Zackary grunted. “I know a thing or two about bad fathers.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry. I’m being all weepy, when you actually lost your father to madness. I can’t imagine what it would feel like seeing your father that way—still alive, but no longer himself.”
Moon Cursed (Wolf Hollow Shifters Book 4) Page 18
