by Kaye Draper
Then she started sobbing, her steps growing even more stumbling and useless. “How do you be a good boy? I’m a terrible boy. A terrible girl too. That’s why he left.”
Ethan sighed. “Come on, mom, almost there. And you’re perfectly fine as a man or a woman, okay? That’s not why he left us.”
They managed to wrangle the tall, confused woman into the house and shut the door. Ethan steered her into the living room and onto a couch while Grey went to the thermostat he’d spied on the way in and cranked it up a few degrees. The cold might not bother him much, but Ethan’s mom’s clothes were damp from her tumble, and she was shivering.
Ethan stood back, eyeing his mother warily in case she decided to flop onto the floor or something. “I’m gonna go get your robe, okay? Just…stay here and I’ll take care of you.”
She nodded and looked up at him like a lost child. “Thanks, baby. I know.”
Grey met Ethan’s eyes as he silently pleaded for help. “I’ll stay here and…get to know your mom.” Or, you know, make sure she didn’t pass out and hit her head—again—on the coffee table.
Ethan hurried off and Grey sank down to sit on the coffee table, uncomfortable, but also having some major insights. No fucking wonder Ethan was the peacemaker in the band—always taking care of everyone, never wanting to rock the boat. “Do you want me to get you some water or something?” He could see the kitchen from here, but he wasn’t too keen on leaving her sitting up. She was kind of…swaying.
She shook her head and reached out to pat his cheek with more force than needed, her face wistful. “I was pretty once too,” she confided. Then her sad smile crumpled into despair. “Now look at me.”
Grey caught her hand. Oh well, he didn’t know her, and it wasn’t like she’d remember any of this come morning. “I know how hard it is sometimes,” he whispered softly. “I’m a morph too, just like you.”
She sucked in a breath and gripped his hand. “How do you do it? How do you stand up there on stage in front of all of those p…p…people…and pretend? How do you stand it?”
Grey shook his head. “Honestly? I have no fucking clue. But I do it. I guess I just…refuse to let this bullshit rule my life anymore.”
She blinked at him, clearly about to pass out. “Oh. You’re stronger than me.”
Grey patted her hand. “You’re not weak. But…maybe you could try to be a little stronger. For Ethan?”
The expression on her face told Grey he was right. She might be a complete and utter fuck-up, but she did love Ethan. And now she probably depended on him to keep her together. Damn. Grey would take Rick’s distant cold shoulder any day over the guilt trips and clinging that Ethan probably endured.
A noise caught his attention and Grey lifted his gaze to find Ethan watching them from the threshold, a fluffy white robe clutched in his hand.
Shit. Grey didn’t have to ask. He could see by the wide eyes and the startled look that Ethan had heard Grey’s confession.
Somehow, he found it hard to care.
Finally, Ethan seemed to find control of his feet again. He came forward with the robe and a pair of pajama pants. “Here you go. I’ll help you get changed, mom. Then you can have some tea and get some sleep, okay?”
Grey stood, not wanting to help Ethan strip his drunk parent. “Tea stuff?”
Ethan gave him a faint smile. “The kettle is on the stove. There’s a canister in the cupboard by the fridge. And cups are above the sink. Thanks.”
Grey set about making tea in the other room while Ethan got his mom changed and snuggled onto the couch under a pile of afghans. At one point, she started raging and yelling, and Grey peeked in to check on them, but Ethan waved him away with a quiet, “It comes and goes.” Once she had calmed down again and nodded off—with a bunch of promises that Ethan would be back soon—they got her rolled onto her side so she wouldn’t choke on her own puke and slipped out the door so Ethan could give Grey a ride home.
“How long has she been like that?” Grey asked softly as they made their way to the car under a mantle of big, puffy falling snowflakes.
Ethan hunched his shoulders and looked at the ground. “Ever since it happened, pretty much. She tried living as a man…but she was really unhappy. So she started dressing and acting like a woman. But that only made people at work avoid her or start harassing her. And now…it’s like she’s one thing one day, and something else the next. Her moods swing too. This is mild. Sometimes she’s…not nice to be around.” Grey didn’t miss the way Ethan lifted a finger to the faint scar at his temple. “I never know what to expect. Except the drinking…that’s pretty consistent.”
They slid into the car and Grey reached over to touch Ethan’s arm through his thick wool coat, stopping the unconscious tattoo rubbing the guy had started doing. “Your dad left?”
Ethan nodded and let out a long sigh. “Yeah. Bailed right after The Change. So it was just her and a teenage son while she tried to deal with all this shit.”
A sudden wash of anger hit Grey like a tidal wave, demanding he get revenge for Ethan’s pain. Grey clenched his teeth together for a few seconds until he got himself under control. “She hurt you.”
Ethan glanced his way, startled. “I…yeah. A few times. But she didn’t mean it.”
Grey reached out and touched the while line of the scar on Ethan’s temple, just to the side of his eyebrow. “What happened?”
Ethan snorted and looked away, trying to laugh it off, but unable to hide the pain in his eyes. “Broken beer bottle. She…thought I was my dad for a second. I guess we look a lot alike when you’re drunk off your ass.”
Grey sighed. And yet, Ethan was still taking care of her, even now that he was an adult. “This is why you don’t live at the townhouse full time, isn’t it?” Grey said, an odd mix of emotions churning in his gut. On one hand, he understood what Ethan’s mom was going through—it was hard at best. And at worst, it drove people mad. But on the other hand…he kind of wanted to go murder her for what she was doing to Ethan. This wasn’t his burden to bear. Not as a kid, and certainly not now, when he had a budding music career and a promising life ahead of him.
“You can’t stay tied to her forever,” he said carefully. “I know you love her, but what about your life? What about Lucifer? You’re like…leading a double life right now, aren’t you?”
Ethan sighed, and for once, he didn’t bother with the fake cheer. “I guess I am. I just don’t know what else to do.”
Grey held up his hands in defense. “I am not one to give advice. I’m over here living a complete lie myself, so…sorry, but you might be on your own with this one.”
Ethan huffed a laugh and started the car. He cast a glance at Grey as he pulled away from his mom’s house. “Yeah. About that….”
Grey snorted. “Yep. Used to have tits. Now I have a dick. But I don’t tell people because it only makes life harder. Good times.”
Ethan arched a blond brow. “Except, you told my mom. And me, accidentally. And…Luca knows?”
Grey nodded. “Yeah, he does. The weirdo doesn’t seem to care. And…I guess that has made me really rethink the whole secret identity thing, you know? Maybe not everyone would rat me out or treat me like shit.”
Ethan reached over and patted Grey’s knee, then pulled his hand back, like he’d just realized the gesture might be misinterpreted. “Not everyone. Probably not even most people, if you gave them a chance. But I get why you hide it. I’ve seen the shit my mom’s gone through any time she tries to live as a woman.”
He chewed at his bottom lip for a second before he spoke again. “I won’t tell anyone, Grey. You know that, right?”
Grey shrugged. “Of course.” And he was surprised to realize that he believed it. Ethan was so…good. He’d never betray someone that way. Especially a bandmate. Especially someone he wanted to fuck.
Oh, yeah. And there was that.
“About earlier,” Grey said, hating every word. “Can we just never speak of it agai
n?”
Ethan’s charming smile reappeared as he turned toward the trailer park. “Are you sure? I mean…that was some kiss. Might be worth Luca murdering me with his bare hands.”
Grey snorted. “Whatever.”
But secretly, he was reliving the moment himself. Something about kissing Ethan, wrong as it was…had felt right.
Monster genes, Grey reminded himself. You’re part sex predator, after all.
They pulled up in front of the trailer, where Grey planned to finish packing up the rest of his stuff to move to the town house. Grey opened the car door and slid out. “You sounded great today, by the way,” he said as he closed the door. “See you tomorrow.”
Ethan waved and pulled away, still looking a bit sheepish, but recovering. Grey stood on the sidewalk with his arms wrapped around himself, feeling completely chilled to the bone. Ethan had never given any indication that he was interested in men. Not until today, when he’d been alone in close confines with Grey. While Grey sang.
Grey could feel it more and more, something inside him that was growing with each passing day. Luca had said he thought Grey's siren powers were just starting to mature. Grey hugged himself tighter and fought the chill as he turned to the door, wondering just what sort of monster he was becoming.
Chapter 54
Grey hunched into his wool coat and pulled the collar up around his ears. Luca walked close beside him, and he seemed even more miserable than Grey, though he kept up a good front, using his tall frame and broad shoulders to shield the shorter man from the frigid air. It was cold. Too damned cold. Winter should be drawing to a close soon, but Grey just had this sinking feeling whenever he thought about spring.
He hadn’t found a good time to bring up the whole Ethan incident with Luca yet. It seemed like there was always something more important to deal with. After all, the fate of the entire island was more important than Grey’s messed up love life or the fact that he might be some kind of sexual predator in the making.
And yeah, he was kind of terrified Luca would hate him.
“Do you think she’ll come?” The cruel wind carried Grey’s voice away. He felt as though he had to shout to be heard. Luca had sent a message to the sprite who had accosted Grey before, through some watery channel Grey didn't understand. He had managed to set up a meeting with the creature's sister, who apparently worked as a sort of handmaiden to the siren pod.
Luca shrugged and looked out over the angry sea, his dark eyes a misty blue swirl. “She will. Human stories portray sprites as fickle, but they’re usually quite steadfast, once they have something to commit to.”
“I didn’t mean to imply anything,” Grey rushed to assure him. It was hard to think of Luca as one of them. And it almost killed him inside that Luca thought Grey was questioning Luca’s ability to commit to things. For fuck’s sake. Grey was going straight to hell.
Luca glanced at Grey and his beautiful mouth curled into a soft smile. “I know.”
Grey stiffened for a second, but then he realized Luca was only answering what Grey had said a second before, not reading his mind. It didn’t matter. It was one kiss. It was just a little bit of unwanted lust. He just had to focus on Luca. He loved Luca. So much that it terrified him, if he was being honest. That’s all that mattered. Even if it broke Grey’s heart a little, thinking of how much Ethan deserved love. It didn’t matter. They’d break the curse and life could go back to normal. Ethan could move on and find a nice, normal girl to love him. It didn’t have to be Grey. It wouldn’t be Grey.
But a small, stupid part of him still mourned the loss of what could have been.
They came to the place where they had seen the sprite before. Grey glanced around, but the churning waves were empty. “How will we let her know we’re here?”
Luca cast around on the beach until he found a pebble. His eyes went all strange again as he did…something…then he tossed the pebble out into the waves. Within a minute, a foamy form rose from the water and hung suspended at the shoreline. It was a different sprite this time. Her features were sharper than the other’s had been, and though she seemed more feminine, she also seemed older…fiercer. “My brother said you would call,” she sighed in voice like the waves on the shore.
Luca nodded. “Can you help us find the kleidí that rules over this island?”
Grey still didn’t quite understand the importance of this kleidí thing. But if it gave its owner power over the islanders, then Arianna had proven she was not to be trusted with.
The watery sprite tilted her head and her silvery hair ruffled about her shoulders and torso like curling waves. Her eyes slid to Grey. “You are the siren’s child? The one who wants to end this winter?”
Grey nodded. The sprite’s silvery gaze slid back to Luca. “The Gods are obsessed with humans, but they overlook their own children. All because humans have souls. They refuse to interfere with human matters, even when it was something inhuman that caused the mess. Even when their own children suffer. We cannot stand the cold for so long. Some of us have had to re-locate. And those who stay are creatures with hearts of ice.”
Grey could feel the edge of anger in her. From what Luca had told him, sea creatures such as this sprite were tied to their homes. It was dangerous for them to attempt any permanent sort of move.
Luca’s eyes grew sad at her words. “I’m truly sorry,” he said softly. “Pontus can’t interfere. But he’s given me this quest, sent his blood. We want to help. If we can find the kleidí, we can end this curse.”
The sprite regarded both of them for a long moment. Then she addressed Luca once more. “You will make sure Pontus knows that my family has helped you, even when he refused to save us?”
He nodded.
“The siren keeps a trinket on her person most of the time, something with old, powerful magic. It must be the kleidí. She doesn’t live among the rest of the pod. I will discover the location of her lair and relay it to you. She will be most vulnerable there.” Her expression shifted slightly and she almost smiled. “However, I want something in return.”
Luca looked wary. “Tell us what you want, and we’ll consider.”
She did smile then. “Only a small thing. A kiss.”
Luca raised his dark eyebrows. “That’s it? A kiss. Nothing more?”
It sounded so ridiculous, like something out of mythology. But then, that was kind of Grey’s life these days.
The sprite nodded her silvery head. Luca glanced at Grey and Grey shrugged. If it got her to tell them where the stupid object was, Grey didn’t care if Luca kissed some water creature...thingy. After all, Grey wasn’t about to say anything about Luca making out with other people. No way.
Luca sighed. “Fine. A kiss. Then you tell us where it is.”
The sprite stepped gracefully from her watery pedestal onto the sand. As she passed from the damp sand at the shore to the fine, white sand where they stood, her slender feet left behind fading circles of wetness. Luca stood taller as she approached, but she walked right past him, coming to a halt in front of Grey.
She tilted her head back and gave him an impish grin, dimples showing in that glass-like skin. “My kiss?”
Fairytale creatures were tricksters and rogues all the way through. She knew Grey had assumed she meant Luca. Grey didn’t look at Luca. He simply leaned down and fitted his lips to hers. Grey's eyes closed and he stiffened slightly at the sensation of her lips on his, cool and smooth as glass. He pulled back and opened his eyes to find her regarding him with a look of disappointment.
“What was that?” She crossed her arms impatiently. “Does the fate of this island mean nothing to you?”
Luca rubbed the bridge of his nose and tried not to laugh at Grey. The asshole. “Uh she means something different than what you’re thinking. A kiss is like…a promise? A favor that you bestow on someone for doing you a valuable service.” He shrugged at Grey’s confused look. “Just…you have to mean it. The gratitude part.” He waved his hand, still choking
back laughter. “It’s a magic thing, just go with it. Think about owing her a favor.”
Grey still didn’t understand, but he sighed and stepped forward, trying to channel his inner Don Juan. He slipped his hands beneath the sprite’s cool, silky hair to cradle her face, tilting it up to him. Then he closed his eyes and pressed his lips to hers, slanting his mouth over hers with more pressure. Her arms snaked around his waist and she pressed herself to him on tiptoes. Grey felt as if he were drowning, enveloped in cool water, floating on the tide as energy slipped between them—that must be her true goal, the power inside him that he could feel her siphoning off. It was disconcerting. She took advantage of the moment of surprise to slip her cool tongue between his lips.
Grey released her and stepped back, shocked out of his determination. The drowning sensation stopped immediately, and he stared into silvery eyes like storm clouds. “A weak imitation,” she accused. “Human hearts are supposed to be these complex, fiery things. Where is your warmth, your soul? I certainly couldn’t taste it.” Her form wavered, her face changing, until Grey was looking at a female version of Luca, the sharp angles of his face muted to feminine beauty. Luca sucked in a sharp breath behind him, but Grey ignored it.
Grey clenched his fists, the first wash of embarrassment quickly overcome by anger. He didn’t have time to sit here playing spin the bottle with some demented nympho. They had an island to save. “Look, this just isn’t how things work for humans. I can’t just fake love, if that’s what you’re getting at. Hearts don’t work that way!”
The sprite glared, her face melting back into its original form. “Human hearts. Fickle things! The heart of the sea is fierce and ever changing.” She turned and dove into the water, disappearing beneath the waves.
Grey looked at Luca, dumbfounded. What the hell was wrong with these creatures? “Shit. I fucked that up, didn’t I?”
Luca put an arm around Grey’s shoulder and turned him back the way they’d come. “Don’t worry about it,” he soothed, but his dark brows had drawn together in concern. “We’ll figure something out.”
