by Fields, MJ
I fall to my seat, listening to him as he asks his fans for assistance on getting this video to me.
Mason stands back and observes the mess I become as I listen to him sing about me being his gravity. Every part of the song fills me with painful memories, but also memories I helped him through, and memories of what made him who he is today.
And through it all, at every stage, I loved him more. Yes, I still walked out on him, but I never stopped loving him.
Instinctively, I wrap my arms around my belly, loving the little girl that he blessed me with. I reach for a tissue when I realize Mason is still standing there, watching me cry as the man I love sings his heart out for me.
“So, are you going to forgive him now? Wait, holy shit, Ms. Pace, is that baby his?”
I laugh through my tears at the awkwardness of sharing this moment with my student. “Watch your language.” I laugh. “Here,” I say and hand him his phone. “Thanks for showing me.” I walk out of my classroom without saying anything else. I don't have a class first period, so I need to get out of here and regroup before I have to teach my students.
As I reach my car in the teacher parking lot, I see Trevin leaning against it, waiting for me to arrive, and I instantly fall apart, losing control of any ounce I had left.
I walk up, standing a few feet in front of him, and when he sees my tears, I watch as nothing but pain fills his eyes.
“Trevin…” I whisper.
“Shh…” He reaches up, wrapping one hand around my neck and pulling me into him, locking his lips with mine in a single, intense kiss.
We stand there locked at the lips until he releases to take a breath and goes in for more, opening his mouth and searching for any answer he can get from mine.
I hear the sounds of kids laughing in the background right before bolts of lightning rush through my body, sending sensations I’ve never felt wrapping around my belly, through my hips and around my lower back.
Confusion of us, of him, and my emotions run around in my heart until my head kicks in and I bring my hands up to push him away.
“Please, Lily…please don’t do this. Let me be—”
“No, Trev…” I cut him off. “Oh shit, my water just broke!”
With our eyes open wide, we both start to panic. I stand still, holding my belly and trying to breathe through the pain. It rips my insides apart, and Trevin tries to comfort me while guiding me to the other side of my car to open the passenger door.
After he places me in the car, he reaches around to wrap the seatbelt around my belly, and crouches down next to me. “Are you okay? I’ll get you to the hospital, I promise. I’m going to be here, Lily. I want to be a dad. I love you.”
“Yes, Trev. I love you too, now get in the car and get me to the hospital!” I yell, pushing on him to get going.
His sexy smirk fills his face as he gets up, running to the other side of the car. The door flies open, and after he buckles, he looks around, reaching up to the ignition, the center console and his pockets. I watch as he starts to panic as I hand him the keys from my purse, holding them out to him just as another contraction rips through my body. I scream and double over in god-awful pain.
His hands are on me instantly, comforting me, rubbing my back as he says, “Breathe, just breathe. Come on, baby.”
I glare up at him. “Drive.”
“Oh yeah.” He puts the key in the ignition and starts the car.
He peels out of the school parking lot and heads toward the hospital across town. “Hang in there, baby. You got this,” he says as he rubs my leg back and forth before, yelling out, “Holy shit!”
“What?” I say shocked at his outburst.
“We’re having a baby!” he says, hitting the steering wheel.
The excitement written all over his face brings a smile to my lips, even in the face of pain. I can’t deny I’m beyond happy he’s here with me. I have every answer I need in this moment, and I can’t imagine having this baby without him by my side.
I reach out, intertwining my fingers with his. “We are, Trev. We’re having a baby.”
He pulls my fingers up to his mouth just in time for another contraction to rip through me. “Squeeze my hand, baby. I know you can do this.”
“I’m scared, Trev. They’re coming really fast.”
“I’ll get you there. Don’t you worry. I’m here for you, Lilies. I’ll always be here for you.” We pull up to a light and he leans over to place a kiss on my forehead. “You’re almost done.” He looks at his watch. “In five, four, three, two…okay, it should start to get better now.”
My head falls back as the pain subsides and I take a deep, cleansing breath. Once I can think again, I can’t help but ask, “Why were you counting?”
“Each contraction builds, getting stronger and stronger for about twenty seconds and then it releases and will get better. So if you know you can last twenty seconds, it will help you get through the pain, knowing it’s calming down,” he states like he’s an expert in the field of childbirth.
“Excuse me? And how do you know that?”
He shoots me my favorite smile I’ve missed so much before admitting, “I’ve been meeting with a midwife and taking private childbirth classes so I’d be ready when you went into labor.”
“Trevin—” Happiness overwhelms me, but it’s washed away quickly by pain ripping my insides apart.
Keeping my eyes closed, I focus on the feeling of Trevin’s hand wrapped in mine, and his voice as he counts out the twenty seconds, knowing life is just the way it should be.
We pull into the parking lot, and after putting the car in park, Trevin races to the side and opens my door, helping me out of the car and up to the hospital.
Before we walk in, I stop him. “Wait.”
“Please, Lily, don’t stop me. I’m going to be here with you. There’s no way I can miss the birth of our child.”
“I’m sorry, Trevin. I’m so sorry I pushed you away for so long. I just want you to know I’m so glad you’re here right now.”
He pulls me close to him, kissing my forehead. “Me too, Lily Pad. Me too. Now let’s go have a baby,” he says, pulling me back and showing me exactly why I love this man so much.
* * *
A few hours later, we welcomed a tiny, seven-pound, six-ounce baby girl into the world. Right after she was born, they placed her on my bare chest as tears ran down Trevin’s face seeing his daughter for the first time. He was by my side the entire time, and now we’re waiting for them to finish her newborn screenings before we can get her back.
“Here, Dad,” the nurse says. “You got a bare spot on that arm of yours for another tattoo?”
We both look at each other, wondering what she meant.
She laughs, signaling to him. “Come over here.”
He lets go of my hand and walks toward our baby girl. My heart melts as I watch his face fill with pride when he looks down at the miracle we created.
The nurse places an inkpad on the bottom of our daughter’s tiny foot and reaches for Trevin’s arm that isn’t covered in a sleeve of tattoos. He holds out his arm, letting her stamp our daughter’s footprint on the inside of his bicep.
He looks down at the small foot with five little toes then looks to me with a huge grin covering his face. “Looks like I need to find a tattoo artist in town,” he says, keeping his arm out so it dries properly.
“Oh jeez,” I tease.
“Okay, Dad, you ready?” the nurse says as she picks up our baby.
“What, um…really? I get to hold her?”
“Yes, silly. Meet your daughter,” she says, holding out her arms and handing her to Trevin for the first time.
My heart soars as I watch his face light up with amazement when his arms wrap around our tiny angel.
“Do you guys have a name picked out?” the nurse asks.
Trevin looks at me, slightly panicked that he has no clue what our daughter’s name is.
“Yes, we have a name.�
� I look straight at Trevin, and with a gentle smile, I answer, “Her name is Julie.”
His eyes fill with tears as emotions he can’t hold back take over and he pulls Julie into his chest, letting out sobs he’s trying to hide.
“Julie’s a beautiful name,” the nurse says as she walks to the whiteboard in the room, writing, Welcome to the World Julie, in big red letters with the time ten thirty-five am underneath it.
Trevin makes his way to my side, leaning down to kiss me before handing me our little bundle of joy.
She’s so tiny, all wrapped up with her pink and blue striped hat. I unwrap the blanket just enough to pull out her tiny hand, wrapping her fingers around my pointer finger.
“I’m your mommy,” I whisper. “And this crazy man next to me is your daddy.” I laugh while glancing up at him. “Don’t let him call you silly nicknames—it will last the rest of your life.” He lets out a deep laugh. “But he’ll love us to the end of days.”
He gets up, saying, “You got that right,” before locking his lips with mine.
Epilogue
My girls are my life
I’ll shower them with diamonds and pearls
Forever she’ll be my wife
I’ll always remember her baby curls.
- Trevin Allen
Trevin – Age 35
“But, Daddy, I can’t do it,” Julie whines as she gives me her best puppy dog eyes.
“Yes, you can, Julie Bean,” I say, holding the bike steady for her to get back on.
“Just don’t let go like you did when you taught me.” I hear Lily laugh from the driveway where she’s holding the camera, ready to capture Julie’s first time without training wheels.
“No, Daddy. Don’t let go!” Julie says, panicking.
“Way to go, Lily Pad,” I jokingly shout over my shoulder.
I look back down at the beautiful little girl with long brown hair, watching me with wide eyes. I still can’t believe I have a daughter. I don’t get to be around for everything, but there was no way I would miss out on her riding a bike for the first time without training wheels. There’s just certain things that are your right of passage as a dad.
After Julie was born, Lily, thankfully, forgave me for being a dumbass, and I’ve been working hard every day to prove I can be a rock star, a husband and a dad at the same time.
Escape Velocity took off after the Oz Fest tour, and we’ve headlined a few of our own tours since. We’ve also released three other albums with Gravity recorded in a different manner—the original, live, or acoustic—on each album.
But all my band’s success is nothing compared to being a father.
My manager knows I can only be on the road for a few weeks before I have to take a break to head home to my girls. When I’m on the road, I Skype them so I can continue our nightly reading of Judy Blume’s books—Julie’s favorite.
“What does Mommy mean, Daddy?” Julie asks.
Lily walks out to join us in the street. “Did you know your daddy taught me to ride a bike?”
“You did?” Julie asks, glancing back at me.
“Yup, I did. And look at how good she is now.”
“That’s right, Julie. Your dad’s a great teacher. And he won’t let go.”
I wrap my arms around Lily. “That’s right, I’ll never let go.”
* * *
Thank you for reading Gravity! I hope you enjoyed it! If you want another rock star book by Lauren Runow, check out Our Song that is live now and on KU!
https://amzn.to/2zGwjMO
Our Song
After a devastating accident crushed my dreams, I ended up back in my hometown teaching kindergarten. I was trying to make the best of it. That is, until the world I had to leave behind, showed up in my classroom in the form of a five-year-old little girl. Her father living the exact life I almost had.
Adam Jacobs
on is known as the bad boy of rock. While he and his band tour the world, they leave a trail of mayhem. What no one knows is behind the music is a caring, straightedge man with a secret — a daughter who the world is about to discover.
When they move to my small town, their secret is blown. He needs my help to keep her out of the media, and with each exchange we grow closer. Only problem is I need to stay away from the memories he ignites, and the temptations he brings my way.
Secrets I’ve kept and thoughts of that fatal night come crashing back into my life. I have to wonder if it was more than fate that brought his little girl into my classroom.
Our Song
If you loved GRAVITY, check out this sneak peek to Lauren Runow’s next rock star book, OUR SONG, that’s live now and on KU!
Prologue
Sarah
“I’ve never felt so alive!” I jump into the arms of Donnie, our drummer, as applause rings out in front of us.
“You killed it tonight! Biggest crowd yet!” he replies.
My eyes widen in disbelief when I pull back. “You noticed that too?” I jump on the balls of my feet as we run offstage.
“All of us noticed,” Tony says as he joins us in the backstage hallway, his guitar slung over his shoulder. “The owner said it was a sold-out crowd.”
I squeal and do a happy dance, spinning around. I can’t believe all our dreams are coming true.
Tonight, my band, Endless Hope, played at the most happening bar on Bleecker Street. It’s hard to tell when you’re onstage with the lights shining in your eyes how many people are there, but the noise and vibe were more intense than any other show. Everyone was engaged with our performance, and I even heard people singing along.
Having a crowd sing the words you wrote is beyond anything I’ve ever imagined!
Tony wraps his arm around me. “You’ve done us proud, Ms. Hart.” He laughs, and I know he’s teasing me about my name.
I moved to New York from a small, country-living, religious Northern California town to follow my dreams. My parents think I’m only here to attend college. Yes, I’ve been going to classes for my degree in education, but all of my spare time is spent trying to make a name for myself in the music industry.
Well, except I don’t dare use my real name.
If my parents found out, they’d be here in a heartbeat, dragging me back home where my dad would cleanse my soul in holy water for a month.
To say he disapproves of my music is an understatement. As the pastor of our small town that is seemingly stuck in the 1950s, he points his nose down on anything that uses profanity, loud guitar strings, or the pounding of a drum solo.
He won’t take the time to actually listen to the lyrics and how they’re more powerful and meaningful than some of the ones he sings in his beloved church. I’ve made it my goal in life to make him see what rock music is all about, so he will be okay with me following my dreams. I’ve given myself the four years while I’m here to try to make it. When I do, I pray he’ll be able to accept my passion.
I try not to think about what will happen if I can’t change his mind at that point. I keep reminding myself that, if I’ve already made it in the industry, it wouldn’t matter, but deep down, that little girl inside me still wants the approval of her father.
“Okay, you guys, ready to head out?” Donnie asks after he loads the last of his drum set into our rental van.
“I can’t just go home.” I throw my arms in the air. “I’m still flying high from tonight! Want to go to the diner to get some food?”
Tony glances at his watch. I’m sure it’s almost four in the morning.
Before I moved to New York, I’d drive to San Francisco, trying to get a taste of the life I wanted outside of my small town. The clubs closed at two in the morning but not here. Living the nightlife has a totally different meaning in the Big Apple.
“I could go for some breakfast. I have to work in a few hours, so as long as they have fresh coffee, too, I’m game. No reason to try to sleep now,” Donnie says.
I wrap my arms around his neck, tightly hugging him.<
br />
I don’t know what I’d do without these guys. When I found their flyer, looking for a lead singer, at a local bar, I took a chance and made the call. I never would have imagined they’d become like family to me. While I have my parents paying my way, these guys both work two jobs, plus our gigs, to make ends meet. They see the end goal and have the same dream of making it big someday.
We walk the block to a diner on the corner. It’s a beautiful night in Manhattan, and the cool breeze washes away the last of the sweat on my brow from bouncing around the stage. While Tony goes over tonight’s set, discussing which song was received better and if we should switch up the order, I take in the calmness of the last hours of dusk before dawn. Even with the majority of stores and shops closed at this hour, there’s still an energy, about this city that lives when everyone else is asleep.
I feel that buzz in my toes.
It’s a bright light glaring in the midnight hours.
Except that light is no longer a metaphor.
I turn around just in time to hear the screech of tires, the headlights glaring in our eyes brighter than any stage I’ve been on.
Screams yell out.
There’s a loud pounding as the car hits the curb.
Donnie covers me with his large frame, taking me to the ground with such force that my shoulder comes down with a shooting pain.
My head throbs, and then there’s darkness.
Total darkness is all I know after that.
And my dreams … they fade away just as fast.
Chapter 1
Seven Years Later
“Morning, sweetheart. Just calling to wish you good luck on your first day. Is your classroom all set up?” Mom asks over the phone as I walk out the door of my small apartment.
I grin at the memories of helping her set up her classroom over the years.
