by Kennedy Fox
“So? It’s his apartment too.” She shrugs, obviously not understanding the amount of hatred Hunter and I have for each other.
“First, it was my shirt.” I pause when she bursts out laughing. “Second, he’s a manwhore, and you deserve better than that. Got it?”
She slowly inhales a deep breath before bringing her eyes back to mine. “Calm down, okay? I’m not even interested in him that way. He’s just fun to flirt with and beg for free drinks from. Or in my lame case, non-alcoholic drinks.” She rolls her eyes, which makes me laugh. So eager to grow up when life doesn’t get any damn easier.
“Just be careful, please. Hunter knows how to sweet talk and get his way.” I look over my shoulder and see a chick approach him, and he leads her to the bar for a drink. “See?”
Maddie chuckles. “Stop worrying. I’m a big girl. Plus, guys usually run far away once they find out they aren’t getting to home base.” She shrugs, and I see that same embarrassed look in her features as before.
“Waiting to experience it with a guy you really love makes it that much more special. Trust me.” I pull her in for a side hug. “Plus, no booze or sex during training.”
“Something I’m actually mastering.” We both laugh and walk back to the group.
We play pool and darts for the rest of the night, and Hunter prances over with his new friend. I decide since I have nothing nice to say, I won’t say anything at all. Besides, he makes it a point to talk to all his friends and my sisters yet deliberately ignores me. I can deal with his asshole remarks and digs at me, but acting as if I’m invisible somehow makes me even madder.
Hunter glances in my direction once, his lips in a firm line, eyes unmoving, then shifts away just as quick.
His silent fuck you makes my jaw clench, and I’m determined more than ever to forget his entire existence.
Chapter Eight
Hunter
Almost two weeks have passed since that night the group of us played pool and darts together. I can’t seem to shake the way Lennon looked at me with disgust as if she were reading my most personal thoughts about her. I want to sleep all day, but I’m pulled awake. My eyes pop open, and I turn and look at my phone and see it’s barely past nine, which is late for me on a Saturday. My internal alarm clock goes off at seven each day since I have to get up so early for work.
I roll out of bed and immediately open the curtains, then look out at the green grass and cloudless blue sky. I can’t believe it’s already April, and in a blink, it’ll be summer. Since I’m outside most of the day at work, I notice the weather because it affects everything I do.
After I go to the bathroom, I walk into the kitchen and decide to make breakfast. I crack open a couple of eggs and begin to scramble them when Brandon goes to the fridge and pulls out a gallon of milk. He drinks it straight from the jug, which makes me laugh. If Lennon saw him do that, she’d shit bricks.
“Oh you’re making me breakfast too?” He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and grins.
I chuckle. “Isn’t that what your woman is around for?”
“She went shopping with Maddie and Sophie today. Apparently, the outlet mall has some sale, and I took a hard pass.”
“I’ll cook for you, baby,” I taunt. “But I’m not putting out.”
He bursts into laughter and pulls two plates down from the cabinet. I scoop the first serving for him, then grab more eggs.
“No bacon?” he asks.
I roll my eyes. “Beggars can’t be choosers.” I start cracking them into a bowl and mix them before pouring them into the skillet.
Brandon opens the fridge and looks inside but doesn’t find any bacon or sausage. Actually, there’s zero meat in there. All we have right now is canned tuna.
“Thank God Lennon is going to the grocery store when she’s done hanging with her sisters. The fridge is practically empty,” he states.
“Did you give her a list?” I ask him as he leans against the counter and eats his food.
“She knows what we like,” he says around a mouthful.
A few minutes later, my eggs are done, and I turn off the stovetop before I slide them on my plate. I grab a fork and walk to the table. Brandon follows behind me, and we both take our seats.
He looks at me as if he has something else to say but hesitates.
“What’s up?” I finally ask because he’s being weird as fuck.
Sucking in a deep breath, he runs his fingers through his hair and pulls his phone from his pocket. I wait for him to speak up while I finish eating.
“I want to talk to you about something,” he begins, his breaths uneven and shaky.
My heart pounds, and I hope he’s not about to blindside me and ask me to move out or something. The last time he looked like this was less than a year ago when he told me his girlfriend was moving in. Different scenarios rush through my mind.
“I want to propose to Lennon.”
Dagger meet heart.
He scrolls through his phone and then flips it to show me a photo on the screen. “This is the ring I picked out. Do you think she’ll like it?”
My brows raise, somewhat shocked. I look at the picture, and my eyes go impossibly wider. “It’s stunning. She’ll love it,” I manage to choke out.
“It’s a princess cut diamond ring on a white gold band. Exactly what she wants, I think,” he says nervously, looking at me. He’s waiting for some sort of approval, so I smile.
Jealousy washes over me, but I push it away, forcing those feelings to step aside because right now, I need to be supportive of my best friend. “It’s perfect.”
A wide grin fills his face, and happiness radiates from him. “Thanks, man. I’m actually really fucking nervous about this. But since I started at the firm, I’ve been saving money so I can get her the ring she really deserves. I love her so damn much, and I’m ready to take our relationship to the next level. Being with her the past two years has been…well everything, and I know without a doubt she’s the one. You know when you just feel it?”
I nod, my heart lodged into my throat. “When you know, you just know.”
“That night we met at the bar, it was special. Within the first five minutes of chatting with her, I knew she was the woman for me,” he continues.
That familiar feeling returns. How’s it possible for me to have felt the same way about the same woman on the same damn night? But Lennon made her choice, and regardless of the chemistry between us, Brandon was her best choice, is her best choice. He’s a good guy. I know he’ll give her the world and everything she’ll ever want. I’m a selfish bastard sometimes, but as hard as it is to say, even I’m man enough to admit I can’t give her what she needs. And that’s what matters in the end.
“Yeah.” That’s all I offer.
“I was gonna ask her on Valentine’s Day, but her parents are conservative, so I thought when we visit them over the Fourth of July weekend, I’ll pop the question then. We just had our two-year anniversary, and I haven’t met her parents in person yet, so I think it’d be a really sweet way to propose so her family can be involved. I might fly her sisters in too because I know how close they are and how Lennon would want them there. The logistics are a little overwhelming, but I’m gonna figure it out.”
Brandon looks down at the photo on his phone, smiles, then locks it. I can see the sparkle in his eyes and know how fucking happy he’d be spending the rest of his life with Lennon. “I haven’t told anyone yet, not even my parents, so you have to promise not to let it slip around Lennon.”
Ever since I saw her in my kitchen that night, I knew this wouldn’t be easy. I just didn’t realize as time passed, it would only get harder.
I smile and let out a chuckle. “I won’t tell her. I’ll take your secret to the grave. Also if you need any help with anything, I’ll be happy to do whatever you need. I’m here for you.” It’s a response that’s expected even if I just want this conversation to be over so I can drown my feelings in a bottle of beer.
<
br /> “Well, I wanted to ask you something too. I know it’s probably early for this, but I want you to be my best man. You’re my best friend. You’ve been with me through everything, and I can’t imagine you not standing up there beside me as I marry the woman of my dreams. I imagine it’ll take a while to plan the wedding, and the earliest it would be is next year, but—”
“I’d be honored.” I cut him off and swallow hard.
Brandon stands, and so do I, and we exchange a tight hug. “I’m happy for you. You deserve it, man,” I tell him, genuinely meaning it.
As we break apart, I grab my plate and place it in the sink. He does the same. “Thanks. Appreciate it. Now to grow some balls and get down on one knee and pray she says yes.”
I chuckle. “She’s going to automatically say yes the moment those words leave your mouth. Shouldn’t even be a concern.”
“Hope you’re right. I never imagined I’d find someone like her—gorgeous, sweet, strong values—and she’d actually be interested in a guy like me. We never would’ve met had you not guilted me into going out that night. When I think about it, she’s actually more your type. Well, based on the girls you dated in college. I never dreamed I’d even have a chance, but I felt something almost immediately, and there’s no way in hell I’m letting her go now.”
The knife in my chest drives in deeper as if that was possible. “You don’t give yourself enough credit. Lennon wanted you, or she wouldn’t be with you.” That’s been fucking clear since day one.
Brandon nods and watches me rinse off our plates. “I know you two have this weird sibling rivalry thing going on, but you’ll both have to learn to like each other or at least get along. We’re going to be a big, happy family,” he says, snickering. “The wedding, then hopefully buying a house, and then starting a family. You two are gonna have to set your differences aside so I don’t lose my damn mind. That or Lennon will eventually cut your balls off once and for all.”
At least my façade is believable. The last thing he needs to know is how I feel—how I’ve always felt—about his future wife.
“Yeah,” I tell him, cringing at the visual. “It’ll be fine.” I wipe my hands on a towel.
Brandon chuckles, knowing damn well it’s not going to be that easy.
“I think I’m gonna go to the gym,” I tell him, needing to release the weight of the pain bubbling in my chest. I’m fighting an internal tug-of-war I know I’ll never win.
“Cool,” he says. “I gotta stop by the office. I left my laptop there yesterday.”
“Working on the weekend? Damn.” I walk past him, forcing a chuckle.
“I won’t make partner within the next decade if I don’t show initiative,” he sarcastically responds.
I go into my room and change to my workout clothes, grab my keys, and tell Brandon bye before I head out.
Once I’m inside my truck, I sit there with the engine idling, trying to catch my breath as I hold the steering wheel with white knuckles. I knew this day was coming. Their relationship has always been serious since day one but even more so since Lennon moved in. The part of my heart reserved for her knew this was inevitable. The sinking feeling takes over, and the guilt of wishing she’d chosen me instead of him practically strangles me. I need to work through my demons and be genuinely happy for them both.
I drive to the gym, but after I park, I call my brother before going inside.
“Hayden,” I say as soon as he answers.
“Everything okay?” he instantly asks. I know I don’t sound like myself because I certainly don’t feel like myself.
I try to find my words because I don’t want to be a little bitch about this, but Hayden knows the truth—the full story. He’s the only one who does. “Brandon just told me he’s gonna propose to Lennon in July.”
The line goes quiet, and I have to look at the screen to make sure our call didn’t drop. Apparently, cell reception in New York sucks because of all the buildings.
“Wow, man. I’m sorry.” I hear him suck in a deep breath. I’m sure this was the last thing he expected me to say. “What’re ya gonna do?”
I let out a sarcastic laugh. “Be his best man and give him all the support I can. I’d never do anything to ruin their relationship. She hates me anyway, which I’ve purposely made happen these past two years, but—”
“But it doesn’t make it hurt any less,” he says, somberly.
“Yeah.” I don’t even know what to say, and I don’t know why I called him. I feel as if I’ve lost my fucking mind.
“I don’t have any life-changing advice for you, Hunter. I wish I had something to say that’d fix everything for you, but I’m at a loss. Maybe it’s time to move out and make a real effort to get over her for good. Perhaps date someone for more than a weekend? What was it you told me that one time? Have a one-night stand, wake up in someone’s bed whose name you don’t remember, bathroom sex? Yeah, do all those things.” He chuckles at the memory.
I think back to that time in his apartment last summer when he was still hung up on his high school sweetheart, Savannah. After ten years, he never got over her. I suck in a deep breath and exhale. “I already did those things, remember?” I deadpan. “That was part of my sex bucket list to get over Lennon in the first place. But hell, maybe I need a new and improved list.” One that can numb the goddamn pain.
“You know what they say. The only way to get over someone is to get under someone else, right?” Hayden’s being overly encouraging right now.
“How’d that work out for you?” I ask, reminding him about his own past. “Okay, that was a dick move. Sorry, I’m just frustrated right now.”
“I get it. Don’t worry about it. Anyway, I gotta go. I have a conference call in five minutes, and I want to be prepared to deal with these assholes today.”
I look at the gym and all the people spending their Saturday on the treadmills. “Alright. I’ll call you later if I need to be talked off a ledge.”
“Sounds good.” He pauses, then adds, “You have a lot to offer a woman, Hunter. Don’t be discouraged. You’ll find her someday.”
Before I can argue that I’ve already found and lost her, we say goodbye and end the call, and I make myself get out of the truck. Once I’m inside the gym and find a treadmill, I run until my chest burns, and my lungs beg for air. I don’t give myself time to rest before I’m lifting weights and can barely move. All I want to do is break my body down because I shouldn’t feel this way. I’ll continue to force a smile and be supportive just as Brandon would do for me because I owe him that much. If I could kick my own ass right now, I would because I deserve it.
Considering I didn’t bring an extra set of clothes with me, I drive home drenched in sweat. As soon as I pull up to the apartment, I see Lennon’s car next to mine. I notice she’s slowly walking up the stairs with several plastic grocery bags in one hand and a paper bag in the other, but I pretend as if she doesn’t exist as I stride past her.
“Seriously? You’re such a dickhead!” she shouts, and I chuckle as I climb the stairs two at a time. My legs feel as if they’ll break as I take the top step. I unlock the door, walk in, and kick it closed behind me.
Once I’m in my bedroom, I take off my shirt, grab a clean towel, and place it in the bathroom. I grab a bottle of water from the fridge, feeling dehydration setting in. Moments later, Lennon enters, slamming the door behind her, then drops the grocery bags on the counter. Her hands go to her hips, and she glares at me, but then I catch her studying my shirtless body. I arch a brow, wanting to tell her to keep her eyes to herself. She must realize what she’s doing because she shakes her head and the scowl returns.
“What the fuck, Hunter? You saw me struggling. The least you could’ve done was help me bring everything upstairs because this food is for all of us, not just me. I’m not sure what crawled up your ass and died the past few months, but maybe it’s time to grow the fuck up?”
My eyes meet hers, and I shrug. “Sorry. I didn’t notice
you out there.” I flash her a sardonic smile, which infuriates her further.
She groans so loud it reverberates through the apartment. “Why do you hate me so much? What did I ever do to you to deserve being treated this way? I’ve lived here for nearly a year now, and we still can’t seem to get along. Why do you think that is?”
“Hmm. That’s a really great question.” I pretend to ponder it before I walk around her and go to the bathroom. I close the door and lean against the cool wood, trying to shake the sadness on her face that I’ve caused. This is what’s best for everyone. Making her hate me is easier and the way it has to be, especially now that Brandon wants to propose. If I let my guard down around her, I don’t know that I could hold back my true feelings. Being friends would only hurt worse, so maybe Hayden’s right—I need to make a real effort at moving on. Even if it’s going to be hard.
I need to let go of how I feel and stop torturing myself with what I’ll never have. I need to wake the fuck up and pull myself together. Even if it feels impossible right now.
I jump in the shower and wash off my workout, hoping one day I’ll be able to look back at the ridiculousness of this and laugh. I can’t decide if fate is an angel or if it’s really the devil because this whole situation is fucked up.
I’ve never believed in love at first sight, but Lennon changed that, only to torment me with her presence every single day. Maybe I’m only hung up on her because I can’t have her? Fuck, I know it’s more than that, but I’ll take any excuse to validate how I feel.
After my shower, I change into some clean clothes because I need to get out of this house tonight. I look through text messages on my phone and notice an unanswered one from Jenna. The last time we hooked up, she stayed the whole weekend, playing house and making it obvious how much she liked me. I kept things casual between us and made it clear I wasn’t after anything serious. I could tell she was disappointed, but she seemed to understand at the time.
Deciding it’s now or never, I take the plunge and send Jenna a message asking her to go out with me tonight. If I’m going to actually try to move on, then I need to make a real effort. I don’t want to have these unrequited feelings for someone who isn’t mine, and maybe if I wasn’t so stuck on Lennon, there’d be room in my heart for a woman like Jenna.
