“They know me well.”
“But I don’t.”
“What do you want to know?”
“Why’d you hunt me down?”
“Hunt?” He widens his eyes in feigned surprise. “You make me sound like an animal.”
I laugh under my breath. He just took me like one. “Why me?”
He smiles mildly. “I have to brace myself for anyone’s touch. Grit my teeth and hold my breath. It makes my skin crawl, but when you took my hand in the alley that night, my skin didn’t crawl. It tingled.”
“But you still don’t like it.”
“Oh, I love it, trust me. But I don’t trust myself, Izzy. My reaction is ingrained too heavily into me. I can’t help it.”
“Reaction?”
He shrugs. “I don’t like being touched.”
I get the feeling he won’t expand on that, so I fire another question. “Why?”
“Who are you afraid of?” he counters, evading my question and hitting me with his own.
I try my hardest not to tense. I fail terribly, my muscles aching in an instant under the pressure of his question. He’s already figured out that someone hurt me. I can’t venture into my painful past again. “Tell me,” he demands, leveling an expectant gaze on me, his hand drifting down to my tummy and circling over my scars.
I shrink and shake my head, indicating that I’m not prepared to go there, just as I now know he won’t be indulging me. “I need to go find Jess,” I mumble. He doesn’t push me, and I’m grateful. I can live without his secrets if he can live without mine.
Theo squeezes me a little before lifting me to my feet. “Then I will take you back.” Releasing me, leaving me feeling a little lost, he steps back and indicates across the room to the bathroom. “Help yourself to a shower.”
I smile my thanks and gather up my things before scooting across the soft carpet and shutting the door behind me. I drop my clothes to the floor and fall back against the door, covering my face with my hands. The needy ache overwhelming me feels suffocating. I haven’t just dipped a toe into Theo’s world. I’ve dived in headfirst.
Chapter 9
When I call Jess, she tells me they’re in the Chandelier bar in the Cosmopolitan, a few hotels down the Strip. There’s no need for Callum to drive me back, and I see both disappointment and worry on Theo’s face when I tell him.
“It’s an easy walk,” I say as he escorts me to the elevator. “I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
“Vegas isn’t a place where a young woman should be roaming around alone.” He reaches for the call button and straightens out his jacket. “I’ll walk you.”
“You say it like I’m decades younger than you,” I muse, gazing up at him when I feel him cock me a sideways look.
“Go on,” he prompts, his lip curving. “Ask me.”
“How old are you?”
“Thirty-one. You?”
I smile, delighted. “Twenty-seven.” I return my focus forward and catch his small smile in the reflection of the mirrored doors. I return it until he shakes his head a little, looking down.
“Izzy White,” he sighs, just as the doors open.
I look to Theo, not wanting to step in at the same time as him and collide with his big body. He nods for me to lead, which I do quickly, Theo following. The elevator stops at a few floors on the way down, more people boarding. As Theo moves to the back of the cart, I watch him, wondering what would happen if any one of these people were to catch him unexpectedly on the arm. I can see he’s going out of his way to ensure that doesn’t happen, his eyes wide and watching carefully.
When the doors open, he waits for everyone else to exit before stepping forward himself, but someone waiting outside the lift starts to enter. Theo moves speedily, leaning back to miss the flailing arm of the person rushing inside.
I look on, stunned. “That was some fast moving,” I say, waiting for him to join me. His hand comes up between us, showing me his palm before he slowly takes it to my lower back and pushes me on.
“I have a lot of practice,” he says quietly, for the first time making me wonder if one of Callum’s many duties is to guard him from being touched. His bodyguard. It seems ludicrous, yet since Theo hasn’t told me the consequence of an unexpected touch, I can’t appreciate the level of seriousness.
We exit the hotel and wander down the long curved path past the famous fountain display, my instinct putting me on the inside of him so no one standing by the concrete barriers admiring the show can accidently knock him. He looks down at me and smiles, like he’s privy to my intention.
“I can’t believe you came all this way,” I muse, settling into his side when he wraps an arm around my shoulders.
“And just to get my leg over, too.”
I laugh loudly and look up at him, probably more dreamily than I mean to. “Business,” I remind him.
“Oh, yeah. Business first and foremost, of course.”
I shake my head to myself. I’m the business. “Well, I hope the business was worth your while.”
“It was more than worth it,” he says wryly, returning his attention forward and moving to the side when a tourist armed with a camera barrels toward us. Theo gets us on our way again once the path is clear. “But do me a favor,” he adds.
“What?”
“Don’t let my business wear that skimpy swimsuit again.” He tosses me a disapproving look, and I laugh. He’s a smart man. After seeing my stomach, he knows very well why I wore that particular swimsuit, though he’s not letting his discovery divert his disapproval. I don’t know why that makes me happy. “The answer is ‘Yes, Theo.’”
“Yes, Theo.” I chuckle, feeling him nudge me playfully.
Our short walk to the Cosmopolitan is comfortably quiet and very fascinating. He weaves through the crowds expertly, keeping me close, not only ensuring no one brushes him, but no one touches me, either. When we reach the big glass doors, he opens them for me and places a cheeky palm on my arse when I pass him. I turn to face him once we’re in the foyer, my way of telling him I’ll be okay from here.
He stands a few feet before me, his hands in his pockets, his blue eyes regarding me carefully. “I’ll be leaving early in the morning,” he says quietly, almost regretfully. “So you can get back to your girlie holiday.”
I nod acceptingly, though on the inside I can feel a void forming. “Okay.”
“Call me,” he says, though I don’t mistake it as a polite request. I will be desperate to see him by the time I get home, anyway. As feared, he has a physical hold now, and I don’t want him to let me go. I want to dive at him, bury myself in his huge chest and throw my arms around his neck, but I know I can’t do that without invitation. And like he’s read my mind, he removes his hands from his pockets and opens his arms to me. The magnetic force of him pulls me straight into his embrace without a moment’s hesitation.
“Thank you for…dinner.” I frown into his shoulder as I stand on tippy-toes to get my arms around his neck, feeling him smile against my ear.
“Thank you for bending to my will,” he counters playfully, and I smile, too, lost in the comfort of his tight hug, his massive body completely blanketing mine. “Have fun, sweetheart.” He taps my bottom, and I reluctantly pull free of him, losing the warmth the second we’re no longer touching. I don’t want to jump the gun, but I’m pretty sure Theo’s behavior and the way he’s looking at me are signs of the despondency I’m feeling myself. I honestly don’t want him to go.
“I’ll call you.” I pivot on my heels and jog toward the escalators, not wanting to prolong the challenge of leaving him. I’m ripping the bandage off instead of peeling it away slowly. I take a cheeky peek over my shoulder just as I reach the top of the escalators, finding he’s at the bottom still, watching me go. I smile and lift my hand and give him a small wave, and Theo mirrors it. Then Callum appears, coming to stand a few feet away from Theo. And I realize, he’s probably been in the background the whole time.
I give Theo one last smile before turning away, taking a deep breath, and stepping off the escalator, reminding myself why I’m here. I find Jess at the bar with Kyle, though Denny is nowhere in sight. “Hey,” I say, jumping onto a stool next to them.
“Izzy!” Jess sings, waving the barman over. “Oh my God, what happened?”
“Too much to go into now.” I laugh.
“Cosmopolitan, please,” Jess says to the barman before giving me her undivided attention again. “Tell. Now.”
I look at Kyle, wary, and he laughs, indicating over his shoulder. “I need the men’s room.”
I smile, grateful for the privacy, though I doubt he’ll be gone long enough for me to explain everything. “Thanks,” I say as he wanders off, leaving me at the mercy of my friend’s raging curiosity. “Shit, Jess,” I breathe, slumping over the bar.
“Here, drink.” She pushes a glass over to me, and I accept appreciatively, taking a long swig. “Holy shit, Izzy,” Jess blurts, and I look out the corner of my eye to her, my glass still at my lips. I find her staring at my wrist, and I look down, cringing, knowing what I’m going to see. Red marks. Not too angry, but obvious. “What the hell?” She throws a horrified look at me.
“He…” I stall, wondering if I should share the reasons for Theo tying me up.
“He tied you up?” she asks, moving in closer, hungry for the dirt.
I nod and swig more. “Arms and legs.”
“Eeeek!” she squeals. “And you liked it?”
I can see the hope in her. The desperation for me to have had sex for healthy reasons, which is really quite laughable given how I just had sex. But the truth is, I loved every moment. Even the teasing, torturing tactics Theo adopted. The pain that faded into pleasure. “It was pretty mind-blowing,” I whisper, and she smiles, so bright.
“Did you find out more about him?”
I contemplate that for a moment. He didn’t exactly tell me much, though I feel like I know him a lot better after a filthy fucking session. “He’s thirty-one.” I start with the simplest piece of information.
“What does he do for a living?”
“I don’t know.”
“You didn’t ask?”
“No.” I turn toward the bar. “We didn’t really talk about that kind of stuff.”
“Then what?”
“He’s picked up on the fact that I’ve run from something.”
“Did you tell him?”
“No. Just like he didn’t tell me why he doesn’t like being touched.”
Jess’s forehead creases in question. “He doesn’t like being touched?”
“No.”
“Why?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. He needs controlled environments. He says he’s hyperaware of me. Of my movements, more so than anyone else’s.”
“Wow,” she breathes. “Does he have a phobia? Maybe sensitive skin or something?”
I shake my head, thinking hard. “He can touch me. He can touch anything. But nothing can touch him. But whenever I asked him about it, he closed up. Or countered with a question I really didn’t want to answer.”
“So you’re both broken.” She winces, her face apologetic. “I didn’t mean it like it sounded.”
I’m quick to reassure her. “I know.”
Reaching over, she gives my arm a soft rub, and I smile in return. “Were you serious when you said his cock is so-so?”
I laugh. “He was listening. I didn’t want to inflate his ego.”
“So it’s big?” she asks, excited. It’s ridiculous. We should be more interested in the fact that Theo tied me up, and why he tied me up.
“Very,” I confirm, unable to lie. “And he knows how to use it.” I drift off in my mind, back to the bedroom of Theo’s suite, seeing myself squirm and beg under his attention. The man is entirely irresistible.
Jess slumps back on her stool, taking her drink and sipping thoughtfully. “Wow, Izzy. Could it be serious?”
Her question gives me pause. “I don’t know,” I answer honestly. How serious could being completely and utterly consumed by someone be?
Chapter 10
I felt I owed it to Jess to give the rest of our holiday my all after disappearing on her. I owe it to myself, too. Theo turning up out of the blue knocked me off balance—more so than I already was with him just having a presence in my mind. But I can’t deny how enamored I am by him. Completely hooked.
Over the past few days, we’ve sunbathed, drank, chatted constantly, and we went all out to visit as many of the hotels on the Strip as we could. Cocktails at Caesars Palace, dinner at the Aria, and a few spellbinding shows. It ate up the time, but it also distracted me from Theo. Finally, I can say that my first girlie holiday was everything it should be, and what I dreamed it would be. We haven’t seen much of Denny, but Kyle has kept regular company with us. I can’t be miffed about it, since Jess was so understanding about my unexpected situation. Besides, Kyle has been good fun. Extra good fun for Jess, judging by the smile on her face when they returned to the pool after sneaking off for an hour yesterday.
It’s our last night in Vegas. As I gather up my purse and head to meet Jess, I contemplate the frame of mind she might be in. She went down to the lobby an hour ago to say goodbye to Kyle, who’s heading home to Georgia. I find her at the bar, and when I’ve parked my arse on a stool next to her and ordered my drink, I chance a peek at my friend, finding her grinning across the bar. I look over and see a tall blond bloke. “Missing him, I see,” I quip, rubbing her shoulder comfortingly in the most sarcastic fashion.
“Who?” She looks at me seriously.
I straighten my lips and collect her drink, handing it to her. “Never mind.”
She rolls her eyes and dives into her glass. “A summer fling, Izzy.” She swings a determined look onto me. “It’s our last night. Let’s see Vegas out in style.” Grabbing her glass, she downs the lot and eyes me in instruction to follow, which I do willingly. We both gasp and slam down our empties, then jump down from our stools. Linking arms with me, she marches us toward the casino floor.
* * *
We really are seeing Vegas out in style. I have no idea what I’m doing, but each time I kiss the dice, the guy next to me rolls what he apparently needs to win a stack of cash. So I keep kissing the dice while being plied with alcohol by the waitress tending the table.
“You’re on fire, Izzy!” Jess declares, as everyone around the table laughs.
I shrug and kiss the dice once more when they’re held under my nose, as Jess slides on up next to a South African man at the table.
Yeah, she’s really missing Kyle. I, however, really do miss someone. I smile, unable to stop the warm, fuzzy feeling that the knowledge I’ll be seeing him again brings. Walking away from him in the foyer of the Cosmopolitan was harder than it should have been. What will happen when I get home? The prospect excites and frightens me.
Everyone starts cheering again, knocking me from my thoughts, and I blink and look to my left, finding the man whose dice I’ve been kissing for the past hour is grinning at me. “I don’t know where you came from, but you’re not leaving this table.”
“Actually, I need the ladies’,” I say, placing my empty glass on a nearby ledge. “Give me two minutes.” I dart off to the nearest restroom.
After washing my hands and refreshing my lipstick, I turn to make my way back onto the floor, bumping into Jess at the door. “Hey, you okay?” I ask as she scurries into a cubicle and shuts the door.
“Yeah, you made me need to pee, too.”
I smile and decide to add a bit of blusher while I wait for her. I hear the chain flush and turn my attention to the entrance of the ladies’ when someone walks in, recoiling when I find a man—the guy whose dice I’ve been kissing all night. “Um, the men’s is on the other side.” I laugh, but he does not. In fact, his jaw is rather tight.
“Get back to the table.”
“Excuse me?” My blusher brush pauses midstroke of my cheek as
he approaches, getting way too close.
“You said two minutes. You’ve been five.” He looms over me hostilely. Is he playing a stupid intimidation game? For a second, it works, and my heartbeat annoyingly picks up. But I soon order it back down to steady. I lived on the knife’s edge for too long. I refuse to let this arsehole intimidate me. I move to walk past him, ready to collect Jess and get out of here.
“Whoa, little lady.” My path is blocked, and he takes my arm, holding it a little too firmly to be friendly, and my firm stance falters, wretched flashbacks threatening to come forward. God damn me. Little lady?
“Get your fucking hands off me,” I seethe, determined not to let my vulnerability show. Never. Tugging my arm from his grip, I take a step back. “And get out of the damn ladies’, you creep.” An angry red mist starts to distort my vision, and I blink to clear it, just in time to see him catapult back and hit the deck. What the hell?
Callum appears, giving me the once-over, his jaw tight and twitching. “Are you okay?” he asks, dividing his attention between me and the man he’s just floored.
I can only nod, my mouth dry and useless as Jess comes out of the cubicle, pulling her dress down, obviously keen to find out what’s going on. I catch the man in the mirror pulling himself up, and it takes me a few slow seconds to register him reaching into his trouser pocket. He pulls out a flick knife, and the glimmer of the blade under the lights snaps me out of my inertness. “Callum!” I shout, watching as the blade glides through the air toward Theo’s friend’s chest. He dodges it and catches the man’s arm, ramming it up his back, and the knife hits the floor with a loud clatter. And then there is a gun aimed at the man’s temple. A fucking gun. Of course he has a fucking gun.
“Really?” Callum seethes, tossing the man back to the floor, keeping his gun trained on him. “You have five seconds to get the fuck out of here before I decorate this restroom with your brain.” He sounds as calm as he looks.
“Oh my God,” Jess breathes.
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