“So, you’re keeping the flowers?” Danielle wondered, giving me a puzzled look.
“Yep,” I said confidently. It was a nice gesture from Reid, and actually the only one since that whole morning had gone down. Even if they were just simple flowers, I wasn’t ready to let them go just yet.
Chapter 31
If anyone got their hands on my journals, I’m pretty sure I’d be arrested.
Having something repeated, in the exact same fashion the second time around does not make things easier to cope with. Sure, one would think I should have been prepared for something like this to happen, since I had been down that road before. However, life sucks, and getting knocked down a second time should really be a little bit easier to get up. I was pretty sure just staying on the floor was the way to go; letting everyone just walk over me and give me their suggestions on my ‘next step’. But, for some reason, that damn heart of mine continued to beat. Getting up and facing life was the only thing my body knew how to do. My mind was a jumbled cluster fuck of ideas, and listening to it during that situation would have had a devastating outcome.
“Hey Molly? Are you going to make it to the three-fifteen meeting?” Megan asked through the intercom.
“I totally spaced it.” Groaning, I sunk back into my desk chair and glared at the computer screen. I didn’t really want to go over the invoices from the tour, and crunching my numbers were never really my kind of thing anyhow. “Any chance you can sit in for me? Tell Garret I’m really sorry, but I’m just swamped with this upcoming video shoot.”
Liar.
Staring at my computer screen, I refreshed the solitaire game I had been playing.
“Yeah, I think I can manage,” Megan replied, sounding like it wasn’t something she really wanted to do either. I guess it was a good thing I was her boss and not the other way around, otherwise my ass would have been bored for the next two hours instead of hers.
“Thanks, Megan.”
Hitting the speaker button, I sneered at the reflection of myself on the glass wall and went back to shuffling cards. I really had a ton of work I should have been doing, but I hated the music world at the moment. I couldn’t turn on the radio because Reid’s songs stalked me, and watching television wasn’t an option either considering the music video we stared in together was on heavy rotation. What did I do to deserve this massive ass kicking from Karma? I paid my taxes, I donated to charity, I tried to live a cleaner lifestyle, and what did I get? Nothing, absolutely nothing.
Glancing down at the band aid on my wrist, I released a heavy sigh. Of course I was the idiot who branded herself with a cliché tattoo. Somehow, I had talked myself into it being okay. That the tattoo would symbolize something even if Reid and I went our separate ways. Well, that was the biggest load of horse shit I had ever sold myself before. This tattoo represented the failure of our relationship once again, and this time it was going to be permanent……………………just like the fucking tattoo.
A dark figure walked down the small hallway to my office, quickly thrusting the door open before giving me the opportunity to close out my game window.
“Seriously, Reid? You think showing up at my office is going to make me want to talk to you? One would think not answering your texts or calls would be a good enough hint that I hoped you got eaten by sharks.” My heart burned and my mind said give him hell. I couldn’t deal with this man’s bullshit today, fuck.
“Molly Anne, we need to talk about us,” Reid said softly, creeping closer to my desk with every step.
“There is no us, Reid. You made that very clear to me,” I screamed, tossing my hands up in the air.
“When in the fuck have I ever said that, Molly Anne?” Reid growled, grabbing my chin and forcing our eyes to meet.
“Every fucking day Reid, since you sent me out of your damn house. I’m pretty sure that was a clear ‘we are done, Molly, now get the fuck out’ kind of moment, wouldn’t you say?”
“Molly Anne, are you out of your damn mind?” Reid raged, slamming his fists down on my desk.
Stumbling out of my chair, I flew around the desk and got right into Reid’s face.
“Shut up, Reid. We both know what happened at your place. Your little slut muffin decided she was done letting us play house, and you being the stupid asshole that you are said okay.” My anger was boiling to the point of no return. This man made absolutely no sense. He claimed one thing, and his actions spoke another.
“Molly Anne, you have no idea what happened back at our place. Cassy and I needed to talk, and having you there would have only complicated it.”
“Our place, Reid? Fucking our place? That would have required us to have some sort of commitment, and that was way beyond your comprehension.” My hands were balled up into fists at my sides in fear of reaching out and strangling the idiot. How in the hell did he think that we were going to live happily ever after when he was keeping slut of the month hanging on the side? Reid was absolutely delusional if he thought I would ever agree to the sharing kind of lifestyle.
Reid grabbed me tightly around my waist and yanked me into his chest. I started to fight, but with the man’s size there was no chance at me getting loose. “Let me fucking go, Reid. I can’t stand touching you, asshole.”
“Molly Anne, I need you to believe me when I tell you there was nothing going on with Cassy”
“Just stop fucking lying to me. Please just stop lying.”
I broke down and sobbed. Releasing the tension in my body, I let myself get lost into his massive frame. His beautifully tattooed arms wrapped tightly around my body, his lips pressing softly into my hair. As angry as I was, there was no more fight left in me. Just a broken, hurt, lost shell of a girl.
“Molly Anne, there has never been anyone else but you,” he whispered into my hair, gently pressing his lips to the top of my head.
“Bullshit,” I grumbled between my sobs. I’d heard that line from him before, and look where it got me right back to heartbreak, round two.
I forced myself out of Reid’s arms and reached for a tissue to dry my eyes. I knew my makeup had already made me look like a damn raccoon, and a simple tissue wasn’t going to correct the damage it had done on my face. But, using my sleeve to wipe my nose wasn’t the most attractive thing I could have been doing.
“Can we get out of here and talk some place?” Reid asked, his face wearing the look of sympathy very well. I really shouldn’t have trusted him, considering history had a way of repeating itself. Did I really want to subject myself to listening to the same old apology from him? Was I capable for round three of the Reid and Molly bullshit show, where everyone left with a complimentary broken heart? “Please, Molly Anne.”
“I’ll meet you at the café by my apartment tonight,” I sniffed. My heart kept telling me to hear him out, as my head shouted ‘stupid girl’. Of course my head always lost when it came to my heart, apparently stupid wasn’t something my heart accepted.
“Thank you,” Reid whispered as he reached out to touch me. Quickly, I took a step back and gloomily shook my head.
“I’ll see you tonight, Reid.” Refusing to make eye contact, I glanced down at the floor and waited until his feet left my field of vision. The large door softly clicked, and I bit my lip hard to force back another round of tears. I refused to carry on here in my office.
“Save those tears for your pillow girl. No one wants to see you cry,” my mother’s voice ran out in my head.
Grabbing a clean tissue, I wiped the remnants of my break down from under my eyes and made my way back around my desk. Closing the game of solitaire, I opened the document containing the information for the upcoming music video. Might as well get something accomplished today.
Life tended to get a little crazy and fast paced at times. When I was younger, writing in my journals always seemed to slow it down a little. It was always the moments I needed to reflect the most that made me turn back to those trusty journals. Writing soothed my mind and eased my heart. Em
ptying all my emotions onto a few pages gave me the release my body so desperately craved. Later, Simon would create the melodies that could put my mind at ease, gently erasing away the troubles that filled the lyrics. So, during times like these, where I felt my world was once again ass backward, and I was drowning in a pool of my own misery, I got back to my writings, hoping to free my soul once again.
“Would you like a refill, Sweetie?” a waitress asked, startling myself back to the cold world of reality.
“Please,” I stammered, glancing at my empty coffee cup as she filled it with the warm liquid goodness.
She smiled and patted my shoulder with her free hand. Did I really look like that much of a mess that other people were starting to take pity on me? Sighing deeply, I looked back down at the notebook that held so much pain and heartbreak and started to scribble once again.
I was completely wrapped up in the piece I had been working on that I didn’t even notice the busy coffee shop had switched over and was now being the host to an open mic night. Songs were being sung, and people transferring on and off the stage, but I didn’t seem to care. The words were pouring out of my soul, sucking deeper into the pages of my life.
It was the music that broke my concentration; a familiar melody rang through the small place. My eyes didn’t even need to leave the notebook; I knew exactly who was standing up there playing. Smiling, I set my pen down on the table and glanced up into those beautiful baby blues. If there was ever a third chance afforded to me, then it was staring me straight in the face. I had to believe that this man had something to say. Otherwise he wouldn’t have gone to the trouble of doing this for me. Love wasn’t something that could be just tossed away after conflict. Sure, with time a person can walk away, leaving their heart open for a new opportunity in life. But, that wasn’t the case here. I couldn’t just walk away from Reid while not knowing the truth about what happened. I couldn’t say goodbye when there was still a piece inside of me that begged to hear the man out. I couldn’t just end the greatest love of my life knowing that I still had feelings for the man sitting up on stage, pouring his heart out to me with the melodies and lyrics from his heart. That man meant everything to me, and when I got my hands on him, there was going to be no letting go this time.
Chapter 32
Bottom of the ninth………………month later.
The stage was completely dark, except for the dull glow of the foot lights in front. The heavy black curtains hid the light of backstage, and the only color out in the auditorium was the green glow of the exit signs. I really should have been a little worried about what was going to transpire, considering all I got was a text from Reid to meet him on stage. Maybe this was it; he was finally sick of me and planned to play out a death scene complete with the grim reaper. Shuddering at the idiotic thought, I tightly wrapped my arms around myself, trying to force the stupid thoughts out of my pathetic mind. Of course Reid wasn’t there to kill me. This location was way too public; he would definitely get caught here if this was the place for vengeance.
The soft melody of a guitar started to swirl around the large space. My body started to relax once the melody clicked in my head. This was the song he wrote for me. Reid was here, playing my song.
“Reid?” I called out into the vast darkness, letting the acoustics of the room carry my voice throughout the place.
Reid continued to play as I whirled around to try and pinpoint his exact location. Suddenly his tall dark figure parted the black curtain, slowly sauntering over to my frozen body.
“Hi,” I meekly stated, biting my bottom lip as he continued to walk toward me.
It amazed me how easily I could get lost in his music. His voice mesmerized me, capturing all of my senses with a single word sung. The look of him with his guitar hung securely around his neck was just about the sexiest thing I had ever seen. This man not only captured my mind, but stole every last piece of my broken heart. There was no doubting my feelings for Reid; he absorbed my entire life.
Slowly, the last cord was strummed, and his parting words echoed in my ears. I would never get used to calling this wonderful man mine.
“Molly Anne?” Reid spoke softly, slinging the acoustic behind him quickly.
“Oh Reid, you sure know how to make a girl lose her panties.” I laughed, taking a small step to close the gap in between us.
“Well, I am a rock god.” Reid smirked, snaking his arms around me while pulling me in for a kiss. His lips gently touched mine, sending my body instantly into a downward spiral of lust. Groaning, I pushed harder into his lips, desperate to deepen the kiss.
“Molly Anne,” he broke the connection, pulling back from our embrace.
Letting out a little whimper, I licked my lips to savor the taste of the moment. I had never had sex on stage before, I thought silently as a wicked smile spread across my lips.
“I know what you are thinking, but you might want to hold on to that thought,” Reid stated quickly, reaching out to tuck a short piece of hair behind my ear.
“Are you sure; it would be fun?”
“Molly Anne, you are just as bad as I am.”
“Yep, basically.” I laughed, tossing my head back while taking in the moment. The peacefulness of the empty auditorium was amazing, considering we had been living on tour for the last couple months, spending much of our time surrounded by others.
“I have something to ask you,” Reid calmly broke the silence, completely breaking our embrace.
I smirked, “no Reid, I will not have a threesome.”
Reid simply shook his head and dropped to a knee. I was pretty sure at that moment all sense of sanity just fell out of my vagina, since I started to shake and panic. I was the type of girl who got a happy ever after kind of scenario. Commitment was not part of my future, what I had going on with Reid right now satisfied the need for assurance of the future.
A bright spot lot flicked on and lit up a small circle around the two of us. Great, now Reid could see the deer in head lights look that was gracing my face.
“Breathe, Molly Anne,” Reid stated firmly.
How could I fucking breathe? He was acting all White Knight style, trying to ride off into the sunset together on a damn horse.
“Marry me, Molly Anne.”
“Yes,” my heart spoke before my mind had a chance to offer a rebuttal. A smile stretched across his beautiful face as he rushed to his feet and crashed our lips together. Melting into our kiss, all the doubt and worries seemed to fade away. Cliché? Very much so. But at that moment I didn’t really care. Standing here on this stage I had finally made the best decision of my life. I said yes.
“I take it she said no? Bad luck Dude.” Brody’s voice yelled through the darkness.
Reid’s lips smiled as he wrapped one arm around me and flipped his middle finger to his bandmate. I could hear laughter from out in the seats, but was completely consumed by the man making use of my lips.
“Get a room,” someone shouted at us.
Pulling back from our lip lock, I grabbed either side of Reid’s shoulders. “You do realize you just proposed to me, right?”
“Shit, Molly Anne, I didn’t mean actual marriage,” Reid joked, tossing me a grin.
“Asshole,” I muttered, crashing my lips back into his once again.
“I have a surprise for you outside.”
“I’m pretty sure this was the best surprise ever, Reid.” I laughed, staring down at the massive rock on my left hand.
“Come on.” Reid grabbed my hand and yanked me off the stage. Tossing open the door backstage, Reid placed a fast kiss on my forehead and grinned like a freaking idiot.
My hands shot up and covered my mouth. Tears immediately started flowing again, as I looked over at my fiancé. I couldn’t believe he did that.
So apparently my happily ever after did come true. Sure, my knight in shining armor was covered with tattoos and slung a guitar instead of riding a horse. But, in reality I didn’t want it any other way. Girls like
me did get fairy tale endings; we just had a bunch of shit to go through until our castle finally came into view.
Well, wasn’t that fucking girly. Someone give me some vodka.
Invisible Crown
(Hide Your Crazy, 3)
Coming December 2014
About the Author
T.A. Hardenbrook currently resides in Spokane Washington, with her husband and two young boys. She has a degree in Early Childhood Education, as well as her license in Cosmetology.
Her days include being the family chauffer and referee, all while trying to become the perfect domestic goddess one strives for. Her family of four also includes a very loving American pit bull terrier, a corn snake, and several American Cavies (Which her oldest son shows at ARBA/ACBA events).
Being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis in 2013, life became a struggle and she found learning to adapt was not an easy task. Luckily with the help of daily medication, life is slowly returning back to normal. Having the opportunity to write a novel at that time was a huge boost of confidence in dealing with the disorder, being able to use her hands and type, was therapy for the soul.
Please remember to never let anything stand in front of your dreams.
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Cheap & Classy (Hide Your Crazy) Page 20
