She laughed with him. “I have my moments.”
Alexander stepped into the master suite, the last room on his tour. “And this is my sanctuary,” he said as he pointed out the adjoining private sunroom, two walk-in closets, and the connecting bathroom with the whirlpool tub, double sinks, and oversized shower.
Sarai strode through the space slowly, admiring the heavily carved furniture and king-size bed. The décor was simple, the neutral colors calming. Two original pieces of art hung on the wall over the bed, framed charcoal sketches, one of a nude male and one of a nude female. The work was a stroke shy of being primitive, but made a bold artistic impression. She stood staring at the pair, impressed by their simplicity.
“Do you like them?” Alexander asked, pointing in their direction.
“I do,” she answered, her head bobbing.
“Thank you. They were my first attempt at figurative work.”
“You did them?”
He nodded. “I like to paint and draw.”
“I’m even more impressed then. Something I didn’t know about you, Alex.”
He smiled, pride puffing his chest ever so slightly.
She rounded the side of the bed. The pillows were abundant, the bedding in varying shades of brown against a cream-colored comforter. A mandarin-orange accent throw lay folded at the foot of the mattress. On the nightstand was a picture of his family, the exact same image that had graced that holiday card her mother had received so many years ago. Sarai pulled the framed photo into her hand. The memories made her smile.
“What?” he asked, eyeing her curiously.
She paused as she thought about it being the first time she would ever reveal her secret to anyone, most especially him. She looked at Alexander, and he was still staring at her, the question hovering in his expression. “I have this picture. Your father sent it in a card to my mother one Christmas when I was a little girl. I kept it all these years, fantasizing about you. Wondering what kind of boys you and your brother were. What kind of men you would grow up to be. Sometimes I would pretend that we were all family or that you were my boyfriend. Is that weird?”
Alexander’s eyes were wide. He nodded. “It’s a little weird.”
Sarai shrugged. “Maybe, but I’m not a stalker or anything like that so please don’t get the wrong impression. I just didn’t have much else to entertain myself with back then.”
His smile was full. “I was actually thinking that it was kind of sweet. In a weird sort of way.” He chuckled softly.
She continued as she placed the photo back on the nightstand. “My mother would sometimes cry when she looked at that picture.”
His brow creased slightly. “I’m sorry.”
Sarai shrugged her narrow shoulders a second time. “You have no reason to apologize. My mother once said that sometimes love isn’t what we hope it will be, but a love that lasts a lifetime can sometimes be everything we need it to be. And now that I know more about your father, I think I understand.”
“I wouldn’t know. According to you I’ve never been in love, remember?”
She laughed. “I don’t recall saying that.”
“No, that’s exactly what you said about my feelings for Felicia.”
“Felicia wasn’t the right woman for you.”
“And you know this because . . . ?”
“Because I am nothing like Felicia.”
Alexander took a seat on the foot of the bed, his hands folded together in his lap. He stared at her, the smirk across her face teasing his senses. He knew enough about Sarai to know that she didn’t make those left-handed comments without wanting to prove a point. And if he were honest with himself, he seriously liked the point she seemed to be trying to make.
“We don’t know each other well yet, Dr. Montri, but I’m very attracted to you,” he said. “You are truly a breath of fresh air!”
There was the faintest air of nervousness billowing in the space around her. Her lips were parted ever so slightly, and he suddenly wondered what they would feel like pressed against his own. He found himself imagining the sweetest sensations sweeping between them, and then he was unable to contain the surge of nature that had risen with a vengeance. He crossed his legs, one over the other, hoping to stall his hardening manhood. The moment was pressing, and he reached behind his back for a pillow, dropping it into his lap.
Sarai laughed. “I like you too,” she said. “I like you very much.” She moved slowly to his side, coming to stand by the foot of the bed.
Desire was suddenly orchestrating the moment, raw passion the guiding emotion. Alexander eased his arm around her slim waist and gently pulled her toward him until she stood between his legs. He stared into her eyes, and her gaze was full of trust and need, with a hint of apprehension flickering in the dark orbs. He could feel her warm breath on his face, sweet, soft moist air tinged with the scent of lemon and vanilla against his skin. The moment swept a shiver of emotion up his spine. And then, without giving it a second thought, he kissed her.
It was the barest touch of his lips against hers, warm flesh against warm flesh, as they both fell into the sensation and the intimacy of such a simple act. Alexander couldn’t remember ever being kissed so exquisitely. Her reaction was spontaneous, her lips parting slightly as she pulled in a bit of air. He let his own lips part as well so he could feel the hot, soft steam of the breath they shared. His mind went completely blank as he focused solely on the sparks of need and the crackle of raw sexual electricity passing between them.
Sarai leaned into him. She grabbed the pillow with a tight fist and purposely slid it from his lap to the floor. She nestled herself deep between his spread legs, pressing her pelvis against his hardened member. Her body was telegraphing a need for more, even though neither was truly sure what more was at that point. He encircled her completely, one hand gently caressing the back of her head as his fingers tangled in the length of her hair. The other circled her waist, drawing her even closer to him. She suddenly drew back, gasping lightly as she worked to catch her breath. Desire danced in her eyes, hinting at something secret and sensuous.
Alexander pressed his mouth back to hers, capturing her lips more firmly against his own. He let the tip of his tongue trace the outline of her mouth, teasing the outer rim. She whimpered softly, and he felt her entire body relax, her torso going slack as she swooned in his arms. He savored the taste of her, his touch butterfly soft as she gave in to the slow, sensual sizzle building with a vengeance between them.
He made love to her mouth with his tongue, lapping at her gently, letting it slide slowly between her parted lips. Inside the hot wetness, he found her tongue waiting eagerly. As he teased the tip, she shivered, then purred, the sound a soft, quiet uttering that melted his heart and caused his dick to throb painfully for attention.
He thrust his tongue deeper into the cavity, tickling the roof of her mouth as he slid over the smoothness of her teeth, no dip or crevice left untouched as she pushed back against his tongue with her own. Returning his touch she sucked his tongue gently past the line of her teeth, demanding, controlling, and eager to pleasure him as he was pleasuring her.
Alexander pulled back, his excitement monumental. It took every ounce of his fortitude not to take her right then, wanting to lose himself in the most intimate connection he knew they could share. Instead, he planted a rash of damp kisses across her face, letting her feel his hot breath on her cheek and her chin.
Sarai pressed her palms against his chest, the heat from her fingers searing. As if she could read his mind, she took a step back. She lifted her eyes to his, panting as she struggled to catch her breath. “That was very nice,” she whispered softly.
He nodded, his own breath coming in short, clipped gasps as he fought to fill his own lungs with air.
“But I think I should be going,” she murmured, her body shivering as she tried to shake the sensation of his hands and mouth. “Before this goes any further.”
“Would that be a bad thi
ng?” he asked, still holding tightly to her, his hands skating across her back.
She shook her head. “I imagine it will be a very good thing when it happens. But it just can’t happen right now. Not tonight.” She brushed a soft hand along the curve of his cheek.
Alexander’s eyes skated across her face as he studied her expression. There was something in her eyes that pulled at his heartstrings, but he couldn’t put his finger on what it was. “Are you okay, Sarai?”
She smiled, nodding her head yes, but her body language said something else. She shifted her eyes, fighting to avoid his gaze.
“Then stay,” he said, his head shifting slowly from side to side as he stared at her.
Tears suddenly misted her gaze, her glossy stare concerning to him. She shook her head, her whole body beginning to shake ever so slightly. She whispered, “I can’t. I really do have to go.”
Alexander responded by recapturing the pout of her lower lip between his teeth and lips. He tenderly sucked and nibbled on her mouth. But before they became lost in the flowing sensations, the oral exploration exquisitely magical, he took a swift inhale of air and pulled himself from her. With his hands on her shoulders, he pushed her gently as he stood up, and she took two steps back, a cool breeze billowing between them. He didn’t bother to adjust the bulge in his pants.
Grabbing her hand, he entwined her fingers between his own and guided her out of the room and back to the foyer of his home. They stood in the quiet of the moment as he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her close. She fit nicely in his arms, the top of her head stopping just beneath his chin. He pressed his face into her hair and inhaled the soft floral scent of her shampoo and conditioner. The thick waves tickled his nose and face and made him smile. He drew back, then leaned to kiss her forehead, his full lips caressing. “I had a great time tonight,” he said, his smile endearing. “Thank you for coming.”
“Thank you for having me,” she whispered again, the tingling through her body causing her voice to quiver ever so slightly.
“Are you sure you’re okay, Sarai? I didn’t do or say something to upset you, did I?”
Her head waved from side to side for the umpteenth time. “No!” she exclaimed. “It’s not you. It’s nothing. I’m fine. Really!”
He stared at her, still not convinced but he kept the opinion to himself. “Call me when you get home, please, so I know you got there safely.”
Sarai nodded, and with one last kiss to his cheek, her lips lingering briefly, she disappeared out the front door, leaving Alexander to wonder what had gone wrong between them.
* * *
Zachary was still planted in front of the television when Sarai returned home. As she moved into the room, he sat forward, pushing the PAUSE button on the remote. “Hey, how was your date?” he asked, more emphasis on the word than necessary.
“I had a very nice time,” Sarai said.
He nodded. “I was just about to make some popcorn and find a movie to watch. You want to hang out for a minute?”
She shook her head. “I thought you had to be in bed early? Or did you forget about your training already?”
“No, I just . . . well . . .” he shrugged, biting back any comment as he took in the narrowed gaze she was giving him.
Sarai shook her head. “Go to bed, Zach. You’re back to your old tricks and bad behavior and it hasn’t even been forty-eight hours yet.”
“So, you’re not going to tell me about your date? Did you get a good-night kiss at least?”
She rolled her eyes skyward. “We actually had wild, passionate sex on the dining-room table. It was a really good time,” she said facetiously.
His face was stone as he stared at her, his lids blinking rapidly. “You had sex? At the restaurant?”
“We didn’t go to a restaurant. Alex cooked dinner for us at his house.”
“Alex invited you over to his house?”
“Why do you say it like that? You sound surprised.”
Zachary shrugged his shoulders. “I am actually. We’ve always had this unwritten rule that you don’t invite women to the crib. Keeps them from getting so attached.”
“Clearly, Alexander is following a different set of rules,” she said as she turned an about-face.
“So no movie?”
She shook her head. “I’m exhausted. I think I’m going to turn in. You have a good night.”
As she reached the doorway, Zachary called her name.
“Yes, Zach?”
“You really didn’t have sex with him, did you? That was a joke, right?”
For a split second Sarai stood staring at her friend, disbelief shining in her eyes. She shook her head. “No, we didn’t have sex,” she finally answered as she turned back out the door. She tossed him one last look over her shoulder. “Your brother and I made love. Sweet, beautiful, passionate love!”
* * *
Sleep eluded her. She’d been tossing and turning for over an hour, unable to will herself into dreamland. Sarai rolled onto her back, drawing an arm up and over her head. She couldn’t stop thinking about Alexander, wishing she had stayed to spend the night in his bed. Then she thought about Zachary and his game of twenty questions with an air of attitude that had made her uncomfortable. There was so much on her mind that sleep didn’t stand a chance of getting in to lay claim to her.
Sarai had wanted more. And wanting more had surprised her. Alexander’s touch had been like the sweetest drug imaginable, and she was hooked. But she’d been afraid that he might have looked at her unfavorably, thinking that she might be a woman who was fast and loose with all the men who showed her attention and fed her dinner twice. She blew a soft sigh.
Dating had always been a challenge for her. Western ways were not Thai ways. As a little girl it was expected that a man would court her when she grew up. They would have become friends first and there would have been no touching of any kind and definitely no kisses like the kiss she and Alexander had shared. Any public displays of affection would have had people seeing her as easy or, worse, a prostitute. Any traditional, well-educated Thai girl would have been devastated to be thought of so lowly. And a Thai man would not have wanted to marry a girl of such low class. Sex would only have come after a lengthy engagement and parental approval of the union.
Europeans who visited Thailand came seeking wives and viewed Thai women as submissive and accommodating, with magical vaginas. They wanted female partners who bowed down to the patriarchy, knew a woman’s place, and had no opinion that contradicted their own. Wives who would conform to the stereotype without any deviation and provide them with unspeakable sexual pleasure.
In France she was thought to be a nerd, socially segregated because all Asians were only good at math. She’d been seen as sexually modest, a china doll that might break if touched inappropriately. Her intellect had been allowed to flourish, her sexuality not nearly as much. The varying sexual mores only served to wreak havoc on her self-esteem as she came into herself, discovering everything there was to know about being female.
Her friendship with Zachary had opened her eyes to men who fully appreciated a woman who embraced her sexuality. His honesty and openness had been enlightening, and she’d come to appreciate his views about relationships, even if she didn’t always agree with him. The devastation that had been his marriage had cued her to a man’s vulnerability, and hours of conversation had helped her to put it all into perspective, as she came to believe that having her own wants and desires was a very good thing.
But the nearness of Alexander and the wealth of emotion that had accompanied his touch had actually frightened her, and despite her best efforts, she’d not been able to hide that fear as well as she would have liked. She wanted it to be perfect for them both, because if she were honest with herself, and with him, Sarai wanted Alexander to love her as much as she had imagined herself loving him. And she didn’t think love had anything to do with what he’d been feeling for her.
She rolled against the
mattress as she drew her legs to her chest. She wished that Zachary had been in a different frame of mind because she really could have used a friend to help her figure it all out. But she instinctively knew that sharing her feelings about his brother was no longer a good thing. They’d been friends for so long that Sarai had grown accustomed to his mood swings. But this time there was something about his renewed interest in her relationship with his twin that felt very different.
Blowing another low sigh, Sarai rolled to the other side of the bed and closed her eyes. Despite her love for her dear friend, she didn’t have the energy to worry about Zachary and his feelings. She needed every ounce of fortitude she could muster to handle her own feelings and what was, or wasn’t, happening between her and Alexander.
* * *
Alexander had been pacing the floor of his bedroom since Sarai’s departure. Despite what he felt had been a great evening, he was now feeling like they’d left each other with something unsaid, and the unspoken words suddenly felt like a growing chasm in his head, and his heart. The memory of that look that had crossed her face, a wave of panic dancing in her eyes, was haunting.
He couldn’t stop thinking about her. Every time they were in each other’s presence, he found himself wanting to spend more time with her. He loved to hear her laugh, the musical lilt to her tone, which was one of the sweetest sounds. He enjoyed wallowing in that light in her eyes, that dark shimmer making him feel like they were the only two people in the room. It had been a long time since he’d felt that way about any woman, and it was a feeling he intended to hold tight to for as long as he could.
He moved to the side of his bed and sat down. Reaching for his cell phone, he contemplated giving Sarai a call. Despite the late hour, he reasoned that she could still be up and thinking about him, like he was thinking about her. If she were, she might welcome hearing from him. That’s what he wanted to believe. He eyed the digital clock on the nightstand, and when he realized just how late it was he changed his mind. He imagined that she was probably sound asleep, and he had no desire to disturb her rest.
Guilty Pleasures Page 9
