With a dark look in her eyes, she said, “Damn sure.”
The harsh smell of smoke and wasted life hung in the air as they approached the trailer. Through the door Bear saw a bleached blonde sitting on a plaid sofa. She had a cigarette in one hand and was flipping through a magazine. A half-empty beer bottle sat on an old coffee table beside three empties.
She glanced up as Crystal stormed in, bloodshot eyes moving from her daughter to Bear and then to Jed. She returned her lazy gaze to the magazine. “I don’t have enough food for an extra person.”
Bear fought the urge to grab her by the collar and shake her.
Crystal was trembling, hands fisted, jaw clenched tight. “You drove him away.”
Their mother’s eyes lifted again, and she took a long drag of her cigarette. Jed stepped around Bear, but Crystal moved in front of him, focused on having this showdown. “How could we mean so little to you?” she accused. “How could you choose booze over us and Dad?”
Their mother slid a disgusted look to Jed. “You opened your big mouth, didn’t you? Just like your father.”
“I’d be lucky to be just like him.” Jed stood tall and supportive beside Crystal.
Their mother scoffed.
“I am done,” Crystal seethed. “Done feeling guilty about going off to college to save myself, done listening to you demean us.” Tears brimmed in her eyes. “I don’t know why you’d turn your back on us, on Dad, or what screwed you up so badly that you ended up like this. And frankly, I don’t care. This is the last time I’m coming here.”
“You think your father was so perfect?” Her mother pushed to her feet, wobbling on sky-high heels. “You have no idea what he was like.”
Jed stepped between them. “Yes, she does. She knows all of it. I’m done protecting and enabling you. No more stealing, no more giving you money that you’ll just drink away.”
“You two think you’re so special. You don’t know what he was like. He promised me a good life, and look where I am!” their mother yelled. “He left us.”
“No,” Crystal said, sounding as though she’d simply given up trying to convince the woman of a damn thing. “He was killed trying to get us out of this hellhole. It was you who left us, long before we lost him.”
“THIS HAS BEEN one of the longest days of my life,” Crystal said as they drove toward home.
After they left her mother, they’d gone out for Chinese food, Crystal’s go-to comfort food. But once their orders arrived at the table, even the thought of it turned her stomach. She knew that, like her mother, Chinese food was another thing she’d probably not want to see for a very long time. They dropped Jed at his friend’s house, and he must have apologized a dozen more times. She should be miserable, given the events of the night, but as they drove over the bridge into Peaceful Harbor, she rested her head on Bear’s shoulder and realized that although she was emotionally exhausted, she wasn’t unhappy. She’d never understand why her mother had turned her back on them, but if she’d learned anything from her father’s death, it was that life was unfair.
Bear tightened his grip around her shoulder. “I know, babe. I’m going to draw you a nice warm bubble bath when we get home. You must be hungry. Want me to stop for something?”
“No, thanks. I have everything I need right here.”
“I’m proud of you,” Bear said. “Sad about all of it, of course, but proud of you and Jed for realizing that it’s time to put yourselves first. That’s a really tough thing to do when it comes to family. Do you want to talk about it?”
“I’m still processing it. Thanks for calling Quincy about the apartment for Jed. I’m glad he’ll be nearby. I’d like to spend more time with him. Do you really think you can hire him? Your father won’t like that very much.”
“My father and I are going to have a long talk, and Jed’s your family. That makes him our family.”
She smiled at his confidence. “You’re pretty sure we’ll stay together, aren’t you?”
“Pretty sure? Babe, you’re fooling yourself if you think we’re ever breaking up.”
“I don’t think we will, but we haven’t been together all that long.” She loved poking her Bear, because—as he did now—it made him hold her tighter.
“When we’re old and gray, someone will ask us how long we dated before we got married. No matter what you tell them, I’m tacking on eight months. So get used to it, sugar. You’re stuck with me.”
Married? As he turned into her apartment complex, she couldn’t think of anyone she’d rather be stuck with.
When they got out of the car, she realized he’d parked in the exact same spot where they’d shared their first kiss the night when she’d panicked.
She wrapped her arms around Bear’s neck and said, “Kiss me.”
He lowered his mouth to hers, taking her in a kiss that rushed through her like fire and ice, awakening all the incredible sensations that had been trampled down by the difficult evening. She melted against him, reveling in their closeness and acknowledging in her mind, and in her heart, how free she felt.
She did this. She made the decision to walk away from the woman who had shamed her and continually demeaned her. Would she ever get over the feeling of wonderment, knowing she’d saved herself by putting herself first? That she’d done the right thing by finding a therapist? If she’d never taken that step, she may never have been able to be close to Bear, or even live the life she had. It was empowering knowing that every time life had kicked her legs out from under her, she was able to take control and find her footing again. And it felt equally good knowing that as long as Bear was with her, she’d never have to handle anything alone again.
When their lips parted, hers tingled with warmth.
“Kiss me like that again and we’re going to give your neighbors quite a show.” He nipped at her lower lip, holding her so tight she felt every inch of his arousal.
They went up to her apartment, and true to his word, after loving up Harley, Bear went to fill the tub. Crystal carried Harley into her sewing room, looking at all the dolls her father had made lined up on the windowsill. How could he have known she’d need them so badly?
Bear came out of the bathroom shirtless, his gorgeous chest on display. His thick dark hair was standing up on end, as if he’d just pushed his hand through it, the way she’d like to. His grin was all male, and it sent zings of heat ricocheting through her.
He wrapped his arms around her, kissing her shoulder. “Missing your dad?”
She cradled Harley between them. She loved the way he was looking at her, his eyes brimming with desire. She almost kept her thoughts about the dolls to herself, but she liked that she could finally share her innermost thoughts with him. It was another level of intimacy that she’d come to love.
“I always miss him, but I was just thinking about how much I counted on those dolls for all these years. It’s not like they have magical powers. It’s silly, really, but having them around gave me strength.”
“That’s not silly. That’s love and trust. You believed in your father’s love, and it gave you strength to become the incredible woman you are.”
Embarrassed by his praise, she kissed Harley and set her on the floor. “Thank you. I’d like to think he would be proud of me. So much has changed since we’ve been together. Do you wish you had chosen an easier girl?”
He shook his head. “No, sugar. You’re the only woman for me, and if you don’t know that yet, then I’ll just have to try a little harder.”
“I know it.” She touched her lips to his. “It’s hard to believe that Jed kept all that stuff from me for all these years and I never told him about what happened to me. We suffered separately for so long, and despite living with a mother who did her best to ruin us, we both turned out okay.”
“Better than okay, babe. You’re amazing. Do you think you’ll tell Jed about what happened in college?”
“Yeah, but I couldn’t tonight. We’ve both been through enough today.”
As he led her down the hall, she said, “You give me strength, Bear, the way you believe in me. Thank you, and thank you for being here for me.”
“Don’t thank me, babe. Just love me.” He drew her into a delicious kiss. “Come on, let’s get you in the tub.”
He opened the bathroom door, and steam washed over her skin. He’d brought in the candles from the bedroom, and their flames danced in the romantically dim room.
She piled her hair on top of her head and secured it with a clip. Bear crouched before her, taking off her boots and running his hands up her legs. His touch made her whole body want. He lifted her dress over her head, and it sailed to the floor, followed by her bra and panties. He helped her into the warm bath, which felt luxurious, instantly relaxing her.
He pulled off his boots and socks and unbuttoned his jeans, never taking his eyes off her as he unzipped his jeans ever so slowly. She licked her lips at his provocative striptease as he worked them over his powerful thighs and kicked them to the side. Lord, she loved the way he looked in those black briefs. Visually devouring that formidable bulge, she scooped up bubbles and spread them over her chest, sinking lower in the warm water. She was slick between her legs, and she had the urge to touch herself while she watched him. It was the first time she’d experienced such a strong pull for the lascivious desire. He was watching her so intently, she wondered if he could tell. She couldn’t resist brushing her fingers over her taut nipple, and inhaled sharply at the heat that seared down the center of her body.
He stripped off his briefs, exposing the part of his body she’d come to crave. She loved touching him, loving him with her mouth, her hands, her body. My soul. He knelt by the tub, kissing her as he dipped his hand beneath the bubbles and caressed her belly, moving his hand up as he took the kiss deeper, until it rested just beneath her breasts. She arched, wanting to feel that rough, strong hand caressing her, his fingers inside her. He feasted on her mouth while he moved his thumb lightly over the underside of her breast. When she tried to lean up, he slid his hand lower, teasing over her curls and dipping between her legs. She moaned into the kiss and felt him smile. He loved drawing out her pleasure, and she was learning to draw out his when they were making love, learning how to angle her hips, how to touch him and how to kiss him, how to suck on his neck when he was buried deep inside her and bring him right up to the cusp of release.
His fingers moved over her sex, without entering her. She broke the kiss, the anticipation overwhelming. He kissed her neck, dragging his tongue along her jaw, then nipping at it as he continued his relentless taunt down below. She grabbed the sides of the tub, raising her hips.
“Bear,” she said breathlessly.
“I love hearing you say my name when you’re so close to the edge. But I love hearing it even more when you come. Scooch forward, baby. Let me get behind you.”
He climbed in behind her, and she leaned back, sighing with the warm, wonderful feel of his hard body. He wasted no time, sliding a hand between her legs and turning her face toward him, capturing all her needy noises in a penetrating kiss. There was something about being just out of reach that made their over-the-shoulder kisses scorching hot. His finger drifted over her sex, driving a path between her legs in a magnificent rhythm that brought her hips up and made her toes curl under. She soared with pleasure, and his free hand threaded into her hair, keeping their mouths fused together until she collapsed against him.
She turned, wanting—needing—to be closer. Straddling his hips, she took his face in her hands and kissed him deeply. She was conscious of all the places their bodies touched and of the water lapping at her belly, sloshing over the sides of the tub.
“Hold me,” she whispered. Dropping her hands between them, she curled her fingers around his erection.
One of his arms circled her waist, and the other snuck into her hair, tugging it from its tether. It tumbled around their faces as they kissed, and she worked him with her hand. She stroked him hard and tight the way he liked, taking extra care to squeeze at the top. His kisses drew her in, turning her loving thoughts darker. Hearing his masculine groans made her want to feel more of him.
“Bear,” she said feverishly. “I want to feel you inside me.”
“We can’t use a condom in the tub.”
“I don’t want to. Can I just feel you for one second inside of me without you coming? I need to be closer to you.”
He ground his teeth together. “Baby, I’ll do whatever you want, but seriously, that’s playing with fire no matter how much control I have.”
Adrenaline and passion burned through her, making her heart race and her breathing ragged. She kissed him again. “One second, that’s all. I’m definitely going to see my doctor about getting on birth control. Jesus, how do people hold back? I want so much more of you.”
He smiled as he kissed her, lifting her up and lowering her slowly onto his shaft. She wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder.
“Ohmygod. You feel so big. This is heaven.” She moved, and he gripped her hips, stilling her.
“No moving. Heaven and hell, sugar.”
She whimpered as she forced herself to climb off the most glorious man on earth. “Come on.”
He held on to her as they stepped from the tub. The second her feet were firmly planted on the bath mat, he plastered his body to hers, kissing her breathless.
She took his hand and ran toward the bedroom, not caring that they were dripping wet and sudsy. He tackled her on the bed in a fit of laughter, nearly crushing Harley, who scampered to the floor.
“Condom,” she said urgently.
He sheathed himself in seconds, surprising her when he sat up against the headboard and reached for her, lifting and lowering her onto his shaft as he’d done in the tub. “Ride me, baby.”
She put her hands on his shoulders, and he took her breast in his mouth. She was already so close to losing it, she held on tight, hoping to stave off her orgasm. Her head fell back as their bodies moved in perfect sync. He lavished her other breast with the same attention, circling her nipple with his tongue, then closing his mouth around it. Cool air rushed over her damp, heated skin, bringing even more titillating pleasure. Cupping her breast in one hand, he grazed his teeth over the sensitive tip, causing her whole body to clench.
“Bear,” she panted out.
His hand slid down to her ass, squeezing as he pressed in deeper, stroking over the hidden spot that he seemed to find so easily, sending her spiraling into ecstasy. He pulled her into another mind-numbing kiss, capturing her cries. She could feel his body growing tense as hers gripped and pulsed around him, urging him toward release. She rode him faster, and his fingers tightened in her hair.
She could feel him holding back, knew he wanted to last for her. She loved that about him. “Let go,” she said against his lips. “I love when you lose control.”
A rough, male groan sailed from his lungs as he found his release. “Baby, baby, baby.”
They lay on the damp sheets for a long while, until goose bumps covered her body and he insisted they change the sheets. After changing the sheets and cleaning up the trail of water they’d left from the bathroom to the bedroom, she was digging through her shirts looking for something soft to put on when Bear handed her a bundled-up shirt.
“What’s this?” She looked down at the soft black material.
“Something I got you on the island.”
She shook it out and read the silver letters. Whiskey Loves Me. She clutched it to her chest. “You made this for me?”
He tucked her hair behind her ear and kissed her. “I loved you then. I love you even more now.” He took it from her and slipped it over her head. It fell to her thighs. “For those nights when you might forget.”
“I could never forget, and not just because you text me your name, or because of this shirt, which I love. But because you have imprinted here.” She covered her heart. “And that’ll never go away.”
> “Good, baby, because I want you to always know that you can count on me. My love for you will only get stronger, no matter what we’re going through.”
Her stomach growled, and he touched his forehead to hers.
“Ice cream,” she said. “I need it.”
He pulled on a pair of jeans, and they went out on the balcony and shared a pint of ice cream from her freezer. The warm evening air brushed over her skin. She’d had one of the roughest nights of her life, and still, it was one of the best. She’d learned so much about her family, and herself, over the past few hours, she almost felt guilty for being so happy.
Bear stood beside her, leaning against the railing. “I want to be with you every night. Every morning. Every minute. Do you want that?”
“I’ll ask Gemma if you can come to work with me, like Harley.” Her heartbeat sped up. She missed him so much on the nights they were apart. She had to fight the urge to throw herself into his arms and say, “Yes!” This was a moment she’d never allowed herself to dream of, and she wanted to savor it. There were so many seemingly unattainable moments, but she realized that falling in love didn’t count as one. Falling for Bear had been a massive number of moments woven together like an unbreakable web of love.
“Smart-ass.” He patted her butt. “Move in with me.”
“So you can have your way with me anytime you’d like?”
“That’s a perk. You need to live with me,” he said as she filled her spoon for the umpteenth time. “I’m worried about your eating habits.”
She smiled around the spoon. “Mm. Worried or jealous? Not many people can live off sugar, pizza, and Chinese food and get away with it.”
“Come on, babe. You know you want to take the next step.”
She stuck her spoon into the ice cream again, unable to suppress her unstoppable smile.
“So…?” he urged.
“Remember when we went to Woody’s that first night?”
“Of course. I’ll never forget. That was the night of our first almost kiss. That was the night you started to let me in.”
Truly, Madly, Whiskey Page 24
