From the Ashes

by Marion Kummerow

  “This man is smitten with you,” Georg said. “He could barely take his eyes off you.”

  “What an imagination you have,” she tried to make light of what had transpired.

  “Do I, really? Because the way I saw it, he wasn’t alone in his infatuation. On the contrary, you did your bit to encourage him.”

  She gave a nervous giggle. “That’s completely ridiculous. I was just being polite. Besides, I’d never fall for a communist.”

  Chapter 15

  A few days later Marlene was surprised to get a call from Werner Böhm’s office, informing her of the date and time for an appointment regarding her enrolment as a law student.

  She rushed to the hospital, impatiently waiting for Georg to show up in between classes so she could give him the news. Elated and anxious at the same time, she went through the tasks that had become second nature to her during the past months. Dressing wounds, changing bandages, washing patients or helping them to get out of bed. She did it out of a sense of duty, but unlike Georg and Dr. Ebert, the field of medicine wasn’t her calling. She longed to return to the legal field, to an office filled with healthy people instead of the sick.

  “Georg, can you imagine?” She all but barreled into her dearest friend in her hurry to tell him the good news.

  “What is it, that demands you to attack me like a wild animal?” Georg smiled at her and she immediately felt a rush of guilt running up her spine. Her behavior wasn’t exactly appropriate for a young lady.

  “Herr Böhm has invited me for an admission interview two days from now.”

  “Now, that’s good news. I’m so happy for you,” he said, giving her a quick hug, before he let go of her and frowned. He’d been the one to push and encourage her, so she wondered, what caused his discomfort.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked.

  “Nothing…it’s just…I don’t want you to get hurt. Böhm is my mentor and he has been nothing but good to me, but… he is such a sophisticated man and clearly has set an eye on you.”

  Marlene felt herself blush and adamantly denied that she felt any attraction toward Werner Böhm. “Your fear is completely unfounded, or have you forgotten how he behaved when he closed down our hospital? I could never feel anything for a cold-hearted man like him.”

  “I remember that too,” Georg admitted. “Werner was just doing his duty, since he was under strict orders to requisition the building that very day. After getting to know him I have nothing but compliments for him, he’s far from the cold career politician everyone believes him to be. He’s in fact an honest, intelligent and compassionate man.”

  Marlene shrugged, not understanding Georg’s motives. First, he tried to warn her away from Böhm and now he kept singing his praises?

  Georg must have seen her confusion and added, “I’m just worried about you. You’re a wonderful, sweet girl, and he’s a man of power. He does have to obey the party line and might hurt you without intention.”

  “You’re probably right,” she murmured. Georg’s opinion didn’t help, he was a man and didn’t understand her inner turmoil. She urgently needed female advice. And who better to give advice in romantic affairs than her friend Bruni?

  In the evening she intercepted Bruni on her way to the Café de Paris.

  “Can I talk to you?” Marlene asked.

  “Sure, is it about a man?” Bruni linked arms with her and together they walked through the frosty evening.

  “Why do you always assume there’s a man behind everything?” Marlene exhaled and observed the white vapor coming from her mouth rising up into the air. The harsh cold seeped through her thin coat and she eyed Bruni’s fur coat with envy.

  “Because of the scarlet flash on your face, maybe?” Bruni laughed. Thankfully they soon arrived at the cabaret and the bouncer let them inside into the warmth. Most people heated their apartments sparsely, but since the nightclub catered primarily to Allied soldiers, it never suffered from a shortage of coal.

  Marlene followed her friend to the tiny dressing room filled with glamorous gowns, feather boas, hats, and dozens of cosmetic products. Never short of extravagances, Bruni opened a bottle of fine wine and poured both of them a glass, before she seated herself in front of the oversized, lit-up mirror.

  “Spill the beans,” Bruni demanded, scrutinizing her friend’s face in the mirror as she outlined her perfect mouth with a deep red lipstick.

  Marlene took a deep breath, wondering whether it had been a mistake to come for advice. She already knew what Bruni would say. “It’s about Werner Böhm.”

  “ The Werner Böhm?” Bruni’s eyes widened and she took a sip of the dark red wine, leaving a mark of her equally dark red lipstick on the glass.

  “Yes, him, one of the Gentner group.” Suddenly aware that Böhm was one of the ten most powerful Germans in Berlin, she shuddered. She was way in over her head. No, no, and no. Even indulging the idea of a romantic relationship with him was out of the question.

  “He’s quite the handsome chap,” Bruni said.

  “Right? And he’s so much more impressive in real life than in the newspapers.” Marlene couldn’t stop babbling. “He’s a true gentleman with perfect manners. His presence is so…so…overwhelming and his charming smile. Oh, but…his voice! You have to hear his voice. It’s nothing like on the radio, it draws you right in like some magnetic force.”

  “Dear God! You have it bad for him,” Bruni said and twirled around on her stool to look directly into Marlene’s eyes.

  “I don’t,” Marlene weakly protested.

  Bruni took no notice and said, “So, now you’re asking for my advice on how to attract his attention, right?”

  “Not at all.” Marlene forcefully shook her head, her brown wavy hair swooshing around. “I’d rather know how to dodge his attraction.”

  “You what?” Bruni set down her glass, giving her friend a stern look. “You come here to tell me the most coveted civilian bachelor in all of Berlin has the hots for you and want me to tell you how to get rid of him? Is that right?”

  “Hmm…yes. Or maybe not…I mean…I…” Marlene sighed. “He wants me to enroll in law school and has personally invited me to the interview. I guess I wanted to know whether this was a good idea or not.”

  “You must be kidding me. Every other girl would kill for his attention and you’re asking me whether this is a good idea.”

  “I’m not every other girl.” Marlene itched to leave this place. It definitely had been a mistake to ask for Bruni’s advice. But her friend was in her element and started a long monologue about the benefits of having a protector in these dire times.

  “Having a man like Werner Böhm fancy you is the best thing that could happen to you. Don’t you see this? He’s handsome, charming, decent. Böhm is just the sort of chap to attract. Being the object of his desires is like winning a lottery. That man can help you in all manner of ways. He can get you things nobody else in Berlin has. Go for it, I say!”

  “Oh, Bruni, it’s not about things.”

  “It is. We all want to survive and for that we need things: food, warm clothes, a roof above our heads. Add to that an accomplished man in your bed and what more could you ask for?” Bruni turned back toward the mirror and put blue eyeshadow on her lids.

  “Love?” A nostalgic emotion surged in Marlene, as she remembered the sweet first love with her late fiancé. A pure and warm feeling, that had nothing to do with material benefits.

  “Love is overrated,” Bruni scoffed. “Men are inherently disloyal and selfish. You take from them whatever you can get and when they inevitably tire of you, you move on to the next one. That’s how life really is. Love is just a ruse the Nazis invented to make you produce dozens of little crying babies for the Führer.”

  Marlene felt sorry for her friend who’d never experienced true love in her life. Not from her estranged parents and certainly not from one of her lovers. But it wouldn’t do good to launch into an argument about love right now. “Böhm’s a co
mmunist, a career politician. He has a dark side to him. Remember I told you how our hospital was emptied? It was him who did this.”

  “All men have different facets to their characters.” Bruni looked at her handiwork in the mirror, pouting her lips to see the effect. “So do women, for that matter. Böhm is interested, you have a chance at getting a degree, if you don’t take full advantage of this deal, you’re an idiot.”

  “Ouch! Is this the best advice you can give me?” Marlene was on the verge of tears.

  “Yes,” Bruni said drily, refilling their glasses with the rest of the Pinot Noir. “If you don’t take it, you’re a bigger fool than I thought.”

  “I don’t know...” Marlene said dolefully.

  “I think you do know, Marlene,” Bruni replied pointedly. “The fact that you have come to me for advice and not to Zara clearly shows what you wanted to hear.”

  On the day of her interview Marlene dressed carefully, wearing her best dress and even using a bit of make-up, which she’d borrowed from Bruni. Happiness gave her an added sparkle and she arrived at the university, her completed application forms pressed to her chest.

  Frau Busch, Böhm’s secretary took them and asked her to wait in the hallway outside until one of the law professors would become available. The words took a load off her mind and she scolded herself for reading too much into Böhm’s charming smile. But at once a confusing twinge of disappointment seared through her. It’s not that she wanted him to fancy her. Hell, she certainly didn’t fancy him.

  When Frau Busch returned to call her inside, she said, “Herr Böhm will personally conduct your interview.”

  Emotions surged through her veins and she could only give a faint nod. What on earth had led him to change the standard process and attend to her himself? She frantically searched for a mouse hole to disappear into, but of course, this was impossible. Steeling her spine, she plastered a smile on her face and entered the office.

  “Ah, good morning Fräulein Kupfer,” he said. brightly. “I wouldn’t want to miss out on revising your application personally.” Then he explained to a rail-thin man with completely white hair sitting at the side of the desk, “Professor Klein, this is Marlene Kupfer, a very promising student. She was recommended by Georg Tauber, the chair of our student board.”

  Professor Klein removed the glasses he’d been using to read her application form and observed her with a piercing glance. Despite the friendly expression on his face, Marlene felt intimidated. Professor Klein was one of the most distinguished law experts in all of Germany and even the Nazis hadn’t dared to touch him, albeit after having advised him to stay out of politics.

  She had somehow expected to be asked about her legal background and any prior experience in the field that might qualify her to become a law student, but instead the professor asked question after question about the professions and political opinions of her family and herself.

  Her answers were as stereotypical as the scripted questions. “Yes professor, I was a member of the BDM, the German Girls Union,” and, “No professor, I wasn’t an NSDAP party member. No, I’m not a member of a church nor of a political party.”

  All through the inquisition she nervously rubbed her sweaty palms against her dress and tried not to look in Böhm’s direction, because his first encouraging smile had done nothing to ease her anxiety. On the contrary, her stomach hat fluttered violently.

  “Fräulein Kupfer, would you please elaborate on your vision for a new Berlin?” Herr Böhm asked.

  She couldn’t avoid looking at him and the way his eyes intensely closed in on hers, turned her knees to jelly and an army of butterflies fluttering in her stomach. Quickly turning to Professor Klein, she found strength in his stern, wrinkled face and somehow managed to say, “I wish for a peaceful co-existence of the Germans with the Allies. And I should hope that with time Berliners will regain ownership over our administration and we can live in a truly democratic and lawful state.”

  “Very well said, Fräulein Kupfer,” Böhm beamed with enthusiasm and stood up. His physical presence was overpowering, and she wished at the same time to flee from the room and have him trap her in his embrace.

  Naturally, neither of the two things happened. Instead he stepped out from behind his desk, taking two steps toward her and starting a speech about the Soviet intention to building a democratic German state, the necessity of political parties and the freedom of speech, the principles of democracy, the foundation of a state in a constitution and a proper jurisdiction.

  Marlene felt his need to express the good intentions of the Soviets and she was mesmerized by the passion with which he declaimed the arguments – until he praised the Red Army for their crucial part in liberating Berlin from the Nazi evil.

  It was then that she tore her gaze away from him and found Professor Klein’s eyes that mirrored her own disdain for the Russian soldiers. But neither of them uttered a word of protest.

  Böhm’s speech came to a glorious end praising Berlin’s paradisiac conditions in a not so distant future under the beneficial rule of socialism. Then he looked at Professor Klein and said, “I’m sure you’ll agree with me, that this bright young lady here is accepted into the university.”

  “Certainly,” Professor Klein said. He must be well aware of the hierarchy in the room. If the Soviet installed chairman of the culture and education department deemed a student worthy to be enrolled at the law faculty, a law professor had no further say in the matter. “Classes begin next month. Frau Busch will give you the details.”

  Later that day Marlene met with her friends Zara and Bruni, giddy to bring them the good news.

  “So, tell us the juicy news,” Bruni greeted her with a huge grin.

  “How do you know there’s news?” Marlene stuttered, but she knew she couldn’t deceive her friends. Shy Zara would never open a conversation like this, but of course Bruni cut right to the chase.

  “Isn’t it true that you’ve been pining for Werner Böhm, since the university inauguration?” Bruni laughed.

  “And I hear, he’s crazy about you,” Zara added.

  “Who told you this?” Marlene eyed the two of them with a suspicious glance.

  “Georg’s cousin of course. Herr Böhm talks about nothing but you when he’s alone with Georg,” Zara answered.

  Good gracious. Just what Marlene needed. Even before she joined the university, she already was the center of the gossip.

  “And…is it true? Are you and Böhm a thing?” Bruni asked.

  “Don’t rush her, you know she’ll tell us in time,” Zara, the voice of reason in their trio, said. Her amazing waist-length hair astounded everyone with its ebony shimmer that contrasted perfectly with her porcelain skin and her red lips, making her look like a real-life version of Snow White.

  “I have decided that Böhm isn’t for me, but…,” Marlene found pleasure in keeping her friends on tenterhooks. She took a measured sip from the wine glass Bruni handed her. The full aroma attacked her senses and she inhaled deeply to smell more of the heavy, fruity scent. With an evil smile toward Bruni, she said, “That wine is delicious. Truly special.”

  “Enough prevarication. I have to leave soon,” Bruni couldn’t hide the fact that she was dying to hear Marlene’s news.

  “If you insist…I’ve been accepted into law school today.”

  Zara threw her arms around Marlene, hugging her tight. “That’s such great news. When will you start?”

  “Next month already,” Marlene beamed with pride, completely forgetting how reluctant she’s been to apply at the university.

  “I’m happy to see you optimistic like this.” Zara smiled. “Joining the university is a great move. A law degree will ensure a comfortable future.”

  “It’s all well and good to plan for the future,” Bruni said with pursed lips, putting a damper on Marlene’s elation. “But what about the present? Who will provide for you and pay your bills? Certainly not your parents.”

  “I’ve been
thinking about this myself…I could still work with Dr. Ebert between classes the way Georg does.”

  “That’s what I mean,” Bruni replied. “You’ll be spreading yourself thin, working at that place and studying at the same time. How long do you think you’ll last under such pressure?”

  Marlene sighed. “I don’t know.”

  “It won’t be forever. As soon as Marlene is settled, she can go looking for a job in the legal field. Maybe even at the university, something where she can combine work and study. Aren’t you happy for her? Remember it was you who encouraged her to pursue this opportunity?” Zara said.

  “Oh no, don’t put this on me.” Bruni raised an eyebrow in an effort to look offended. “My advice was to take advantage of Böhm’s attention and start her studies with the comfortable knowledge that he will provide for her. Now that silly woman has bitten the hand that wants to feed her. How will she put food on the table and clothes on her back?”

  Zara and Bruni were arguing back and forth on her behalf, until Marlene had had enough and stomped her foot on the floor. “Hey! I’m still here.”

  A perplexed Bruni broke out into a giggle. “Yes, sweetie, you are. And you know that I’ll always support you, but my support includes some tough love. Zara here might be too chicken to tell you, but someone’s gotta spring the truth on you. You’re missing out on a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity by not entertaining Böhm’s attraction.”

  “I know. But unlike you I actually value love, and he simply isn’t the man for me.” Marlene sighed and her eyes became dreamy at the memory of his intense gaze and the electric tension she always felt in his presence. If he were any other man but a leading communist party official. No, she simply could not allow herself to have feelings for him.

  “What’s not to love about him?” Bruni was about to start another lecture in how to deal with men, but closed her mouth when Zara interrupted her with a warning glare. “Have I told you about my new job as a kitchen aide in the French casern?”